


Worth a Thousand Words

by Heath17_KO5



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: Don’t copy to another site, F/F, Photographer AU, background kellex, possible background soran, the whole uswnt - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2020-10-13 15:58:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 90,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20585147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heath17_KO5/pseuds/Heath17_KO5
Summary: Photographer Tobin has been hired to do the (tastefully nude) photography for a USWNT calendar, the proceeds of which will be used to benefit charity. She expected a busy day. She expected the long hours. She expected the nervousness of the women. She did not expect Christen Press.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My friend had this idea and I started writing words and the words turned into this which will apparently be multiple chapters. I don't know how quickly I'll be able to update, but I'll do my best. I hope you like it. If you do, hit the kudos button or leave me a comment.

Tobin meets the US Women’s National Team members in a blur before they start the shoot. She does her best to put them all at ease, knowing that stripping down can be nerve-racking, even for people with experience doing so. They’re loud and amped up and full of nervous laughter and jokes and broad smiles, and Tobin does her best to remember all of their names as they decide that they should go in jersey order, starting with Alyssa Naeher at 1 and ending with Christen Press at 23. 

Christen is a face in the crowd. A very PRETTY face in the crowd with soft, warm hands and a bright smile and stunning eyes, but Tobin’s got a job to do and she couldn’t do her job if she was easily distracted by a pretty face.

She’s abnormally aware of her, perhaps, as she starts shooting, and Christen seems to hover nearby, not intrusively though. She’s obviously supportive of every teammate, especially the younger ones who are generally less sure of themselves and more self-conscious of their bodies. She has that bit of a motherly aura to her. It’s sweet. And it’s fine since she’s staying out of the shots and honestly it’s kind of remarkable the way that she puts everyone a little more at ease.

Kelley, on the other hand, while hilarious and stunningly gorgeous, has to be literally tugged out of frame by her teammate Alex on multiple occasions. She does, at least, draw out some of the biggest laughs and most genuine smiles from Tobin’s subjects, so she doesn’t ban her from set until her turn.

These women are strong and powerful, all toned muscle and precise movements. They’re a photographer’s dream with the right lighting. The camera loves them. Tobin has never felt gayer in her life, but she keeps her eye professional despite the overwhelming degree of attractiveness that surrounds her.

“20!” she calls out and Alex barks out, “Allie! You’re up!” 

The lanky blonde with big blue eyes that’s been goofing around with Kelley for the better part of 15 minutes snaps to attention and comes over, all smiles and easy poise. There’s a friendly energy to her as she cracks a joke that just hints at some nerves as she slips off her robe and Tobin finds herself laughing along. 

“Don’t worry. You’re in good hands.”

“I bet you say that to all the hot girls,” Allie replies with a knowing arched eyebrow. 

Tobin smirks back. “Only cause it’s true. I have very skilled hands.”

Allie lets out a guffaw, head thrown back in pure laughter, and Tobin captures the moment quickly. 

“God, you’re such a Harry,” Allie accuses and Tobin wrinkles her brow as she indicates that Allie should turn her hips a bit more to the left for the next picture. 

“What does that even mean?” she asks, clicking off another three shots then pausing to adjust the lighting slightly. 

“I don’t know, it’s just...a Harry...” Allie laughs again and Tobin chuckles despite what she’s sure is a good-natured insult. 

“You’re a Harry,” she shoots right back with a grin as she shifts in front of the camera to adjust Allie’s shoulders and make sure her arm is fully covering any sign of nipple before stepping back to take the next picture. 

“Nope. You. How many more pictures, Harry?” Allie demands, but Tobin can tell she doesn’t mind being in the spotlight. 

“Is she always like this?” Tobin asks, looking up at whatever teammate happens to be closest.

Green eyes pop against tanned skin and Christen is grinning at her with a smile that makes the camera around Tobin’s neck feel suddenly lighter. 

“Pretty much,” Christen says. 

“Always!” Kelley pipes up. 

“You love me, Worms!” Allie responds. 

Kelley blows a kiss and Tobin laughs and gets back to shooting.

21 and 22 go quickly and there’s a rising anticipation in Tobin that she can’t quite place the cause of as she takes the last few shots of 22. There are 23 members of the team, she remembers, which leaves just one. 

She knows exactly who she hasn’t seen yet, and her mouth feels unexpectedly dry as she says, “23? Christen? You ready?” 

The nerves that she had so easily helped others overcome all day are etched on her face as she makes her way in front of the camera, fingers tugging anxiously at the robe, pulling it a little tighter around her rather than loosening it. 

Tobin wants to be helpful. She wants to reassure her like she has done for so many others today. She wants to find the right words to say to coax out the brilliant smile she’s tried not to notice all day. 

Tobin never was very good with words. She’s so used to letting her pictures so the talking for her. 

She means to say, “You’ll do great.” Or “it’ll be fine.”

What comes out is “you’ll do fate!”

Christen’s shoulders relax as a confused smile graces her features and her brow furrows in a way that, were she not too busy being mortified at the way her mouth and brain just completely failed her, Tobin would’ve called cute.

“Great. You’ll do great,” Tobin mutters, feeling a blush creep up her cheeks.  _ Professional, _ she reminds herself.  _ You are a professional. She is just another pretty face and you have to take her picture.  _

_ Naked.  _

_ Don’t focus on that. _

“Smooth!” she hears someone call, but she’s not sure if it’s Kelley or the upbeat blonde who had insisted she be called “Sonny” not Emily, and was the only younger team member who seemed to have no trepidation about stripping down to her birthday suit.

She ignores the comment and focuses on adjusting the lighting again to account Christen’s lighter skin tone than Jessica who had gone before her. She offers Christen what she hopes is a soothing smile as she does so. 

“It’s gonna be fine. I’ll make it as quick as I can, and I promise these will all be tasteful and showcase your athleticism,” Tobin reminds her. 

“I know. I saw your portfolio,” Christen replies. 

Something about knowing that makes Tobin feel warm and fuzzy inside and somehow simultaneously anxious. “Oh. Well, g-good,” she stammers. “Great.”

“Fate,” someone calls and this time she’s 100% sure it’s Kelley.

She’s never intentionally made someone look bad in edits, but she might have to make an exception for Kelley.

“It’s just weird to think that people are gonna see me naked, you know?”

Tobin’s never been at home in front of the camera, so it’s easy to understand the nervousness of doing so completely undressed. 

“It’s not going to be risqué. No nipples, no butt crack if you’re not comfortable with it, and obviously no, um, crotchal region.”

“Is that the official photographic term for it?” Christen asks, her tone teasing, and when Tobin meets her eyes there’s a gleam in them that shoots warmth straight through her. 

Tobin’s cheeks flush and she steps back to the relative safety of behind her camera, clearing her throat. She does her best not to think of what exactly is in Christen’s crotchal region as she’d so idiotically put it. She’s never thought about things like that in a shoot before, she doesn’t know why she’s starting to now. 

“Whenever you’re ready,” Tobin says, annoyed that her voice suddenly sounds slightly hoarse. Then again, she’s been giving instructions for several hours now. That probably explains it.

She jumps when someone nudges her arm. It’s Kelley, fully clothed now, but her eyes alight with just as much mischief. She’s holding a bottle of water. 

“You sounded thirsty,” she says.

Tobin narrows her eyes at Kelley, trying to work out if there’s a second meaning to her words or not, but Kelley’s face is a mask of innocent concern. 

“Thanks,” Tobin says flatly, but she takes the water and downs a few gulps anyway. 

“No problem,” Kelley replies with a broad grin and Tobin is almost sure that she’s being teased, but then Kelley’s attention is turning to Christen. “Come on Pressie! We’ve all done it! Time to show us what you’ve got!”

“Kel, you have literally seen me naked,” Christen replies with a light laugh and a shake of her head. 

Tobin feels a tightness in her chest contract uncomfortably, and she fiddles with the settings on her camera a bit, just to kill time until Christen is ready for her photos. 

“Not like that,” Christen adds quickly. 

When Tobin looks up from her camera, Christen’s looking up at her from under long lashes with a shy smile. 

“I mean she and I never-“

“What my friend is trying to tell you is that we went to college together and have played together a long time,” Kelley supplies, “but we’ve never hooked up.”

“What I was TRYING to tell her is that you have a basic lack of understanding concepts like ‘privacy’ and ‘knocking’,” Christen retorts.

Kelley laughs and shrugs. “Maybe I just like seeing you naked. So will you strip already?”

“Must like seeing me naked too,” Alex calls over. 

“And me,” Sonny adds. 

There are a few other scattered “and me”s and Kelley throws up her arms with an eye roll and a huff and declares, “Guys, I’m not THAT bad!”

Tobin’s chuckling and Christen has visibly loosened up, so Tobin takes a few test shots even though she’s still wearing the robe, zooming in on the sharp lines of her jaw and the hook of her nose, admiring how good her profile looks on camera.

From a purely aesthetic point of view, of course. 

“How’re you feeling?” Tobin asks, her voice slightly muffled as she peers through the viewfinder. 

She watches through the lens as Christen’s lips part in a small smile, and the words, “Still a little nervous, but ready, I guess,” are formed. 

Tobin pulls back and looks at her then, offering what she hopes comes across as a comforting smile. “You’re really going to do great. I mean, you’re gorgeous and you’re in good hands, so you have nothing to worry about.” 

It’s an easy compliment. Something she’s said to several girls before, but she’s not sure she’s ever meant it so much, and it leaves a lump in her throat as Christen’s eyes seem to brighten a little. 

“Smooooooth,” Kelley comments, her voice low and full of mischief. 

Tobin spares her a quick glare, then turns back to Christen. “Ready when you -”

The last word dies on her tongue, as Christen shrugs out of her robe, the smooth skin of her shoulders giving way to a muscular back, her arms curling around in front of her, covering her breasts self-consciously as the robe drops down, revealing toned, muscular legs and - Tobin swallows hard - the most gorgeous, most shapely ass she has ever laid eyes on. 

“I - How, um, how do you want me?” Christen asks, crossing her legs and arms still covering her chest as fully as she can. Her shoulders are back to tense, accentuating the muscles there, and as Tobin’s eyes trail down in a manner that is definitely not entirely professional, she takes in sculpted, tense abs. 

_ Don’t make her more nervous _ , Tobin internally scolds herself as Kelley beside her mutters something that she can’t quite make out, but it sounds vaguely like, “On your back, under her, probably.”

Tobin ignores it. She probably misheard anyway. 

Christen is looking at her expectantly, her muscles twitching as she shifts her weight uncomfortably, and it’s...Well, it’s more than a little distracting really. 

_ You have a job to do, _ Tobin reminds herself.

“Um, just, um, relax, uh, relax your shoulders, as best you can, and if you could drop your far hand to your side, and swivel your hips a little bit towards me, and -”

Tobin cuts herself off as she watches Christen’s brows furrow and her body attempt to make adjustments, but not quite getting what she’s going for. Tobin takes a deep breath to center herself, then moves forward, slowly as if approaching a wild animal and trying not to spook it. 

“Here, do you- Do you mind?” Tobin reaches towards her, fingers hovering a few inches away, but already she can feel the warmth radiating off of her. Tobin’s tongue darts out and wets her lips as Christen looks up at her through long lashes and nods. 

Tobin hesitates before touching Christen’s shoulders gently, fingers grazing against the softest skin she’s ever felt. She feels Christen shiver under her touch and wonders if maybe it’s a little too light, so she presses the pads of her fingers a little firmer into smooth skin, guiding Christen’s shoulders to the right angle so that the lighting is hitting her just perfectly. 

She swallows hard, reminding herself once again that she is a professional. She’s doing a job. Nothing else. This is just another day at the office.

“Sorry, I don’t mean to get personal,” Tobin apologizes as she moves her hands to Christen’s hips, feeling the strength there, careful not to actually touch her ass, but her fingers press flat against her stomach and feel the muscles tense there. 

When Christen lets out an awkward laugh, Tobin feels it vibrate through her whole body, pooling warmth low in her stomach. “I mean, I AM naked. I think getting personal is kind of a given.” 

Her voice is light and musical and it hums through Tobin in a pleasant way that she really needs to not focus on right this second. She angles Christen’s hips a bit more, making it so that from where her camera is aiming, she’ll get just a hint of butt and nothing at all from in front. It’ll be sexy, but not gratuitously so. 

“Good,” Tobin says, before stepping around to Christen’s front to better position her arm on her chest. She keeps her eyes firmly above Christen’s abs, not wanting to risk that they might dip any lower, not trusting her self-control quite enough. “Okay, so if you cross this arm like this,” Tobin adjusts her arm a little more self-assuredly, focussing on the image in her head of the final picture rather than the actual view in front of her. 

That is, she does that until Christen moves her arm on her own, a little too far, and then there’s a full breast in front of her, not the biggest by any means, but, God, it’s perfect, firm and smooth, a touch paler than the skin on her shoulder, making the contrast of the darker areola and hardened nipple stand out even clearer. 

Tobin’s mouth goes dry and she licks her lips in an attempt to fight the sudden parched feeling, to no avail. She needs to look away, she knows, but somehow her eyes are not cooperating with her one remaining brain cell that wasn’t short-circuited by Christen Press’s boob. 

It’s just one boob, she tries to tell herself. One boob, one nipple. She’s seen boobs before. She HAS boobs, for Christ’s sake. 

Someone clears their throat somewhere behind, and it’s enough to jolt her back into action. Her eyes snap back up so fast she gets dizzy for a split second, and then Christen’s green eyes are looking at her, squinting ever-so-slightly, the barest hint of a v visible between her brows, and Tobin finds her voice faltering all over again. 

She looks up at the ceiling, says a silent and very quick prayer to God to get her through this, and then she forces what she hopes is a distinctly NOT creepy smile, and says, “Um, here,” Tobin says, doing her best not to flinch when her voice cracks. “Cross your arm like - like this. ” Tobin reaches out, wrapping clammy fingers around Christen’s arm and lifting it to cover Christen’s breast once more, pressing it across gorgeous, smooth skin so that there’s a hint of contained boob peeking out above and beneath it in a way that’s sexy, but understated and accentuates Christen’s bicep and deltoid muscles beautifully. 

Everything would have been fine, then. It really would have. Except that the back of Tobin’s fingers brush the bare skin above Christen’s nipple as she pulls away, her skin so very warm and inviting, and Christen - Christen shivers, her eyes darting away, and her cheeks coloring an attractive shade of pink, and then Tobin is just an awkward apologetic mess. 

“SORRY! Sorry. I- That was an accident. I wasn’t trying to cop a feel. I didn’t mean to - I mean I wouldn’t because - You know, I’m a - It’s my job, I don’t see the nakedness. I mean, I do, obviously, but like in terms of lighting and shadows and the right shots, not like sexiness exactly. Not that you’re not sexy. Obviously you’re extremely sexy, I mean all your muscles from soccer and -”

It’s the full on hysterical laughter from off behind the camera that finally shuts her up, her cheeks burning hot with what she’s sure is an incredibly noticeable blush. Christen is looking at her with an eyebrow raised and an amused smile on her face that only serves to make her look all-the-more attractive. 

“There. That. Look over your shoulder like that and don’t move,” Tobin instructs, seeing the picture in her mind. “Just like that.”

And just like that she’s able to return to being the consummate professional. She moves quickly to the camera, looks through the viewfinder to make sure the shot is framed perfectly. She makes a few adjustments, then takes the picture. She takes a few more for good measure, ignoring Kelley next to her saying, “Hey, why didn’t you try to feel me up? I have nice boobs. I mean my butt’s my best feature, but the boobs aren’t bad, you know?”

“Great! Perfect!” Tobin encourages Christen instead of acknowledging Kelley. She grabs one of the soccer balls that have been lying around, being used as props all day and takes one over to Christen. “Can you angle your shoulders more towards the backdrop, then kind of prop up your leg and rest the ball on your thigh?” 

Christen looks unsure as she takes the ball, and this time Tobin manages to keep her gaze mostly where it’s supposed to be (though that doesn’t stop her peripheral vision from catching sight of two invitingly hard nipples as Christen shifts as instructed). 

The muscles in her thigh and the muscles in her calf are both highlighted as she adjusts her leg, and Tobin grabs a crate draped in a neutral colored blanket for her to rest her now elevated foot on. 

“This one will have a little more of your...your butt. If that’s okay. But the highlight will be those amazing muscles in your leg.” 

“My legs and butt power my career, so...I trust what you’re doing.” 

Tobin’s chest feels warm at the comment, but she ignores the feeling, moving back behind the camera. The shot’s not quite right, though. Something is missing, she realizes, looking through the camera lens. 

Her ponytail, which had been perfect for the first picture, doesn’t work with this one as well, breaking up her back in a way that ruins the shot. Not that her back isn’t still ridiculously attractive, but it’s not the right picture. 

Tobin moves back in front of the camera. 

“Try not to cop a feel this time,” Sonny mutters, and Tobin shoots her a quick glare, before proceeding on to Christen. 

“Not right?” Christen asks. 

“It’s not that, it’s just...Do you mind taking out your ponytail?” Tobin resists the urge to do it herself, to feel just how soft and inviting Christen’s hair might be. 

Christen looks mildly surprised, but nods. “Sure.” She pulls out her hair thing, then shakes out her loose curls, running her fingers through them until they settle naturally around her shoulders. Tobin doesn’t even need to call over the stylist to touch it up. 

“Look over your shoulder at me?” Tobin requests. 

Christen does as instructed, and her hair falls in her face. 

“Do you mind?” Tobin asks, acutely aware of just how in Christen’s space she is. Once again she can feel the warmth radiating off of her body, can see just how smooth her skin is, can see the flecks of blue in her eyes. She breathes a little shallower as Christen shivers ever-so-slightly, then reaches towards Christen’s hair, hesitating, waiting for permission. 

“No, go ahead,” Christen invites, her voice soft and lyrical, her breath hot and sweet as it hits Tobin’s cheek. 

Tobin sweeps most of Christen’s hair to one side, forcing a part that isn’t natural, but will look gorgeous in the picture, and she tucks the rest back away from Christen’s face, her fingers straying through soft curls and ghosting across the warm skin of Christen’s back, just for a second. She pulls her hands away quickly, not wanting to overstep, not trusting herself to behave like she should if she lingers for too long. 

She steps back and squints, forcing her brain to look at the picture before her critically. “Perfect,” she breathes, half to herself, but Christen’s cheeks color once again with a hint of pink anyway. She tilts her head down and looks up at Tobin through long lashes, and again, without even trying, she’s hit the perfect pose. “Hold that,” Tobin urges, rushing back behind the camera. 

She takes the pictures quickly, Christen only shifting minutely, brushing a stray strand of hair back as it falls into her face, adjusting her leg slightly upon Tobin’s request. 

They manage to breeze through a few more poses without Tobin having to actually adjust her and, more importantly, without Tobin letting her professional demeanor slip again. 

“You’re all set,” Tobin finally says. “You did amazing.” 

Christen’s answering smile is shy once again as she slips on the robe that Alex is there to hand her. “Thanks,” Christen murmurs. 

“Hey, how come I only did great?” Sonny protests. 

“‘Cause you wouldn’t shut up,” Kelley shoots back, sticking out her tongue. 

Sonny sticks her tongue out in response, and Tobin just rolls her eyes, but finds herself smiling anyway. They might be kind of annoying, but they’re entertaining, too. The bond between the teammates is clear, and it certainly worked in her favor today. 

Tobin’s almost sad that this very long day is now drawing to a close and she’ll have to say goodbye to this lively group of women. Not that they’re all still hanging around, of course. Although, she notes with surprise, that two that had left earlier had apparently returned while she was shooting Christen. Ashlyn Harris and Ali Krieger, Tobin remembers. The real life couple on the USWNT. Their looks complimented each other so nicely and their chemistry was so obvious that Tobin had asked to shoot them together as well as individually. Fortunately, they’d been more than happy to comply. 

She’ll see them again to go over their proofs, Tobin reminds herself as Christen makes her way to the screened off section that has served as a dressing room today to get dressed. 

“Still looking thirsty. Need something else to drink?” Kelley asks with a smug smile, once again appearing at Tobin’s elbow. 

“You know I can make you look horrible in your photos,” Tobin replies evenly. 

“You won’t though,” Kelley says self-assuredly. 

Tobin raises an eyebrow at her as she begins to pack up her stuff. 

“I’ve got pull with Christen,” Kelley elaborates. 

Tobin forces herself not to react. She manages a small shrug. “Why would that matter?” Her voice is even, she’s happy to hear. 

Kelley grins broadly. “I don’t know. No idea. I mean 23 naked women in front of you today and only one made you flustered, but maybe I’m just reading too much into that…”

Tobin hates that she’s right, but she doesn’t feel the need to acknowledge that fact. “I don’t know what you mean.” 

Kelley shrugs. “Okay. If you say so. I might have considered slipping you her number, but since you’re not interested…” Kelley shrugs again and Tobin bites the inside of her cheek to stop herself from blurting out that she WOULD in fact like Christen’s number. 

_ Professional _ , she reminds herself for the umpteenth time.  _ You are a professional. _

She manages a nonchalant shrug of her own, hoping that Kelley doesn’t notice her clenched jaw. 

Christen re-emerges then, tugging her shirt down, but not before Tobin gets a last peek at a toned, tan stomach. Even though Christen was just full on naked, somehow this little glimpse of skin brings a fresh blush to Tobin’s cheeks. 

Christen smiles at her and Kelley and makes her way over. Tobin reminds herself to keep breathing evenly. 

“So I really did okay?” 

Tobin nods, not trusting her voice now that Christen’s gorgeous, sea green eyes are looking at her expectantly from so close. “Mhm,” she hums. 

Christen bites her lower lip and Tobin can’t stop her eyes from dropping to them. Christen is clearly contemplating something, so Tobin waits, gives her time to decide to say it or not. 

“I know they’re not the finished product or anything, but is there any chance I could see them? Or just one? Just…” Christen trails off and bites her lip again. “Nevermind. Sorry. I know you did an amazing job. I trust you.” 

Tobin feels another flood of warmth at the reiteration of that sentiment, and finds herself dragging her camera back out before she’s properly thought about it. 

“They’re raw, but I try to do minimal touch-ups, so it might not look too different, really, in the end. Still, don’t freak out if you’re not 100% happy with it, okay?” Tobin finds herself saying as she turns on the camera and flicks through a few pictures before turning so that Christen can see the screen. She bites her lip, an unfamiliar anxiety twisting in her gut. She KNOWS she takes good pictures. She wouldn’t have gotten the job in the first place if she didn’t. Somehow Christen’s feedback seems important, though. 

There’s a sharp intake of breath, and Christen’s eyes flick from the picture to Tobin and back. That adorable blush colors her cheeks once more, and Tobin can feel the hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. 

“Wow,” Christen breathes out. 

“Damn, Pressy!” Kelley exclaims, hooking her chin over Christen’s shoulder to peer at the picture. 

It’s irrational, she knows, but Tobin feels a twinge of jealousy tighten in her chest as Kelley’s hands wrap around Christen’s waist. There’s a closeness there, a comfort, and it’s so ridiculously stupid to want that with Christen when she barely knows her, but part of her definitely does. She shoves the feeling down, ignoring it as she turns the camera back towards her, eyes appraising the photo. The lighting was perfect, accentuating Christen’s musculature, making her eyes pop brightly, playing over her curls and making them shine. It was a good picture, regardless of the subject. 

“You are smokin’!” Kelley declares. “Do me now.”

Tobin raises an eyebrow at her and Kelley indicates towards the camera. 

Tobin shakes her head. “I am NOT scrolling through the pictures all the way back to you,” she declares. 

Kelley pouts out her lips. “Mean. You did her. That’s not fair.”

Christen lets out a little laugh, but she looks a little nervous, and Tobin can’t help wondering why. 

“Maybe you should’ve been nicer to the photographer,” Tobin replies. 

Christen turns to look more fully at Kelley. “What did you do to Tobin?” she demands. 

Something about the way her name just rolls off of Christen’s tongue, so easily, so gently, makes Tobin’s heart skip a beat. There’s a defensiveness to Christen’s stance, too, and the idea that maybe, possibly, she’s ready to step up and defend her (not that she needs someone to defend her - she’s more than capable of defending herself) makes Tobin feel kind of warm and fuzzy inside. 

Kelley takes a step back and holds up her hands. “Nothing!”

Tobin rolls her eyes and Christen raises a skeptical eyebrow. 

Kelley cups a hand around her ear as if listening for something. “What’s that? I think Alex is calling me. Bye.” 

Kelley hurries away to Alex, who looks rather surprised that Kelley is suddenly at her side, slipping an arm around her waist, and who definitely had NOT just called her over. 

“What was she doing?” Christen asks, turning back to Tobin. 

She can’t throw Kelley under the bus without dragging herself with her, so she just shakes her head. “Nothing I couldn’t handle,” she replies with a smile that she hopes allays any concern. 

“Sorry about her. Sometimes her filter breaks.”

“She has a filter?” Tobin asks with a grin. 

Christen giggles. “Sometimes. She’s actually really amazing. But don’t tell her I said that. She’s been my best friend since my freshman year of college. She just kind of...I don’t know...adopted me, I guess. I showed up to practice, day one, a little nervous, feeling like I had to prove that I belonged on this elite college team even though I knew I was good, and Kelley just kind of threw her arm around me and cracked some stupid joke and just behaved like we’d been friends forever and...well, and now it feels like we have.” 

Tobin nods, again feeling a hint of that irrational jealousy pressing uncomfortably on her. She rolls her shoulders in an attempt to shake it off. “That’s cool,” she says, her voice even. “Friends like that are good to have.” 

She thinks of her own two best friends who are scheduled to come over for wine and photo proofing later. They’d been thrown together by life, the three rookies on an established club soccer team when they were all still in highschool, Tobin the youngest at only 14 (not that Tobin had told any of the USWNT that she knew the game, played a bit herself). They’d been dubbed “the New Kids” by the rest of the team, and now, more than half a lifetime later, it’s still how they think of themselves. 

“Yeah, they really are,” Christen replies, shooting an affectionate look over her shoulder in Kelley’s direction. “But she can still be a grade A pain in the butt,” she adds with a chuckle.

Tobin grins. “I kind of worked that one out on my own.” Christen’s answering smile makes her breath catch in her throat, and she knows she needs to change her mindset quickly before she does something stupid like attempt to flirt. “So, anyway, it will take me a few weeks to work through all the photos probably. Alex and Megan have my info, and I’ll send them an e-mail when I’m ready to have you guys come back and check out the proofs for final approval. From there is shouldn’t be too long before the calendars can do their initial run, and then...that’s it, really. I’m sure they’re gonna sell like hot cakes.” 

Christen looks a little bashful at that. “Yeah, that’s...I mean, it’s good, but...I mean I’ll be naked. Everyone. All of us, I mean. For everyone to see.”

“You’re in good company, everything is tasteful, and it’s for a great cause,” Tobin attempts to reassure her. It was all true, as well, but she knew that wouldn’t stop some people from buying the calendar just for wank fodder. She didn’t like thinking about that, though. She preferred to think about how the proceeds would go to help girls in underprivileged neighborhoods find sports and get proper equipment and facilities, somewhere they could be safe and get involved with something that might help them change their circumstances. 

“Right. You’re right,” Christen agrees with a smile, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes the way her last one had. 

“Anyway, it’s been a real pleasure working with you,” Tobin says, extending her hand for Christen to shake instead of reaching out to tuck the stray strand of hair that had fallen into Christen’s face back behind her ear like she really wants to. “All of you,” she adds, realizing just how much truth she’d unintentionally put in her statement. 

Christen’s smile brightens, then, and she takes Tobin’s hand, the pads of her fingers warm, her handshake somehow both strong and gentle. “You too. I guess...I guess our paths will cross again soon.” 

Tobin nods. She doesn’t want to let go. She doesn’t want to say goodbye. She has more equipment to pack up and put away and she really needs to do a little set up for the string of family shoots she has set up for tomorrow before she goes home to meet Amy and Lauren, but all of that means she has to stop touching Christen and say goodbye to her. 

She isn’t sure why Christen doesn’t pull her hand away, because she’s definitely verging on holding her hand for an awkward amount of time, feeling sucked in by mesmerizing sea green eyes, before a bark of laughter from Sonny at something that Kelley’s said breaks the spell, and then she’s pulling her hand back and running it through the strands of hair that have escaped her topknot. She tugs the hair thing out and leans over so her hair falls upside down, gathering it up and tying it up before righting herself, and Christen is still right there. 

“Well, I should...get stuff...together,” she fumbles with her words. 

Christen nods and steps back. “Oh, yeah, of course. Sorry. I’ll get them out of here. They have a tendency to settle in anywhere they stay too long. Side effect of spending so much of life on the road. We do our best to make anywhere home. Even someone else’s photography studio,” she jokes. 

Tobin doesn’t mind. She almost says so, but then Christen is offering a small wave and heading over to her teammates, leaving Tobin to her work. 

_ Professional _ , she reiterates, her eyes trailing after Christen and falling to her shapely ass, allowing herself just a moment to take it in in a way that she hadn’t let herself while Christen was naked.  _ I’m a professional. A professional who has just met and photographed the most beautiful woman in the world, but a professional nonetheless.  _

She forces herself to look away, and when the remaining members of the team call out their various goodbyes, she manages just a quick look up and a wave. She doesn’t let her eyes linger on Christen. She resists the urge to look out the window from her loft studio when she’s sure they must be exiting the building. She shuts thoughts of Christen out of her head and focuses instead on the newborn shoot she had stupidly scheduled for 8 a.m. 

By the time she’s double checked her props and collected the blankets she needs to take home and push through the wash in anticipation of tomorrow it’s getting late. She shoots Amy a quick text letting her know she’s apt to be a bit late and to go ahead and let herself in, not that she wouldn’t have anyway. She takes one last stock of the studio and the bundle under her arm, shuts off the lights, and heads out. 

She tells herself that images of green eyes, tan skin, and bright smiles don’t chase her all the way home. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen considers the fact that her friends might just be the worst ones in the world (and in the meantime they hatch some pretty good ideas).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found a little time, so this is getting out way faster than I thought. Seriously, don't get used to this updating pace. I hope you enjoy!

“You’re dead!” 

Kelley smiles, the picture of innocence. “Whatever for?”

“You know I’m in that group chat, right?” Christen informs her through clenched teeth. She glances up at the building they’ve just left, up to the loft window where she knows Tobin is still organizing her studio. It’s silly, she knows, but she’s almost a little sad that there’s no sign of the attractive photographer in the window. 

Kelley wrinkles her nose and Sonny cracks up. 

“You forgot to take her off the chat? That’s AMAZING!”

Christen turns her glare on Sonny. “You’re dead, too. Just wait until we’re not in public anymore,” she threatens. 

Ash throws an arm around her shoulders and grins at her. “It’s fine, Chris. I’d get blushy over a hot photographer too.” 

Ali, to her credit, and possibly getting her name crossed off Christen’s mental revenge list in the process, elbows her fiancée in the ribs. 

“If I didn’t have Ali,” Ash adds quickly, sending an air kiss in Ali’s direction. 

Ali rolls her eyes, but there’s a soft smile on her face and a tenderness to the way she reaches out and touches Ash’s elbow then. 

Christen looks away, not wanting to admit even to herself her longing for a relationship like that.  _ I’m a strong, independent woman and I don’t NEED someone, _ she reminds herself. 

“Ash, you’re also on my kill list. I can’t believe you and Ali came all the way back. Was that completely necessary?”

Ash appears to consider this for a moment, then nods. “Yes. Yes it was.”

“It was bad enough that I was naked. It was bad enough that I was nervous -”

“It was bad enough the photographer was so hot and so into you?” Kelley cuts in. 

“She was not!” Christen replies, annoyed at the way she feels her cheeks start to burn in another blush. 

“Hot or into you?” Kelley asks. “Because she was both. 100%.”

Sonny and Allie nod beside her. Even Alex nods. 

Christen glares harder. “She was not into me.”

“So you admit she’s hot,” Kelley responds with a triumphant grin.

Christen groans and speeds up, ducking out from under Ash’s arm and pulling ahead of her supposed friends. At least once they reach the cars she’ll only have to deal with Kelley. Kelley she knows how to handle. She’s had plenty of years of experience. That didn’t mean that Kelley didn’t drive her crazy, though. 

“She DID get pretty flustered around you,” Alex points out, and would it kill Alex to give her a LITTLE support here? Alex who, in theory, is the tamest of the trio that was her, Allie, and Kelley, also has a tendency to go right along with the chaos that Kelley and Allie like to cause. Right this second, Christen does not appreciate that fact. 

“She was being a little goofy to put me at ease,” Christen replies, feeling more than a little defensive. 

Okay, so maybe Tobin had seemed a little fumbly around her, but she’d probably been that way with everyone else and Christen just hadn’t noticed. 

(Except Christen had been aware of Tobin the moment they entered the studio. She’d been aware of kind, brown eyes that crinkled adorably at the corners as she smiled. She’d been aware of easy, broad grins that flashed perfect white teeth. She’d been aware of full, inviting, pink lips that Tobin had a tendency to nibble on when she was focusing behind the camera. She’d been aware of silky brown hair tucked up into a topknot until she’d shaken it out at the end to put up again.)

Christen shakes her head. She shakes her hands, attempting to rid her fingers of the itch they’d felt to reach out and feel just how soft and silky Tobin’s hair might actually be. 

“Oh, honey. She was flustered,” Allie says, speeding up enough to throw an arm around her waist and pull her into a sort of awkward half-hug that she held as they continued to walk. 

“She was surrounded by naked women. I was flustered too, and I’m definitely not attracted to any of you.” 

“Ouch!” Kelley calls up to her. “That hurts.”

“Please, we are the sexiest beasts around,” Sonny adds. 

“And she wasn’t flustered with anyone else,” Allie says in a knowing tone of voice. “She joked easily with me. She got tongue-tied with you.” 

“Yeah, it was fate,” Christen hears Kelley mutter, and she throws a glare over her shoulder at her best friend. 

Christen had thought it was cute that Tobin had fumbled her words. She’d clearly been going to say one thing and switched part way through the word. Christen’s brain did that sometimes. It didn’t MEAN anything. 

“I still can’t believe you guys had entire group chat about Tobin and I supposedly flirting. Honestly she was just doing her job. It was the end of the day. She was probably just tired, not flustered. You’re all idiots.” 

She catches Allie and Kelley exchanging a look out of the corner of her eye and crosses her arms over her chest in response. 

“She copped a feel,” Sonny volunteers unhelpfully. 

Christen makes a mental note to move her higher up her kill list. She swallows hard as she remembers the sensation of the back of Tobin’s soft fingers brushing along the top of her breast. They had felt like fire, leaving a warm tingling sensation in their wake that she can almost still feel if she thinks about it. Every touch had felt like that, as if Tobin’s touch could have simply burned itself permanently into her skin without her even meaning to. It had taken all of Christen’s self-control not to shiver in excitement every time Tobin had moved in close. She’d failed a few times, but all she can do now is hope that Tobin didn’t notice. “She did NOT cop a feel. Her hand accidentally touched my boob. It’s not a big deal. You’ve copped a bigger feel fouling me before. It doesn’t mean anything,” Christen points out. 

“I mean it wasn’t an unpleasant sensation,” Sonny says, and Kelley earns herself back a few best friend points by smacking Sonny on the arm. 

“Anyway, so what if she got a little flustered? She’s a Portland-based photographer. Okay, so Sonny and Lindsey and AD are up here a lot, but I’m in Utah or with my family in LA or we’re all travelling all over the country or all over the world. I’m hardly about to start a relationship with someone so...settled. I mean, you two both play for Orlando, but you know one of you could get traded, and you know that would suck, but at least you’re both in the life, you get it, you’d handle it,” Christen explains, gesturing at Ashlyn and Ali. 

For once nobody has a comeback for her. Her comments hang in the air until she reaches her car and the relative safety from this conversation that it provides. Allie lets her go with a quick kiss on her cheek and moves to get into Alex’s car behind theirs. Sonny, however, lingers by their car. 

“Can I ride with you guys back to the hotel?”

“No,” Christen says decisively at the same time that Kelley replies, “Sure,” and unlocks the car. 

Christen rolls her eyes and shoots Kelley a look that says, “Really???” 

Kelley raises her arms to the side and shrugs, her face asking, “What??”

Christen huffs and climbs into the car. If Sonny tries to tease her more, she’s going to end up walking back to the hotel. 

“You know...” Kelley starts in a few minutes into the ride in a tone of voice that lets Christen know exactly where this is headed, and she slams her head back into her headrest with a deep sigh that Kelley ignores. “Photography is one of those portable professions.”

Christen’s brows furrow. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that when we talked to Tobin about doing this photo shoot, she said she could come to LA. In the end we decided it’d be just as easy for everyone to fly to Portland since we were all coming from different places anyway, but the point is that she could have travelled. She’s flexible.”

“And not just in the fun way,” Sonny adds in a suggestive voice. 

Christen shoots her a glare then turns back to Kelley who, of course, is grinning at Sonny’s comment. They’re too alike for their own (and everyone else’s) good, Christen thinks as rolls her eyes. 

“Look I’m probably never going to see her again anyway. And who says I want to?” Christen asks, knowing Kelley won’t be fooled by the obvious lie for even a second, but trying it anyway. 

“We’ll see to go over proofs and photo selection,” Kelley points out, not even bothering to address the second half of what she’d said. 

“And you can always come visit me and Lindsey and AD, you know,” Sonny chimes in. “Maybe schedule a little private photography session?”

“Okay, THAT is definitely not happening.” Christen shakes her head vehemently, chuckling a little at the idea. “And technically not all of us will be needed for proofs.”

Kelley scoffs at that. “Like any of us are going to leave decision-making about naked pictures of us up to any of the rest of us.”

Christen’s brows furrow. “What?”

“Would you trust anyone besides you on this team to make good decisions about naked pictures of you?” Kelley asks. 

Okay, maybe Kelley has a point. “Maybe Carli?” Christen suggests, but the truth is that she wants to have final say about what makes it out into the world on the calendar. She shakes her head. “Okay, fine. I’ll see her once more.” 

“Anyway, we’re here for another few weeks until then anyway,” Kelley points out. 

“Gotta love how Jill managed to use this as an excuse for a bonus camp and hijack Providence Park,” Sonny mutters in the back. 

“Any practice is good practice, even if it’s not a World Cup year,” Christen counters. She doesn’t mind camps. She doesn’t mind practice. She loves the game and she loves her job and she knows just how lucky she is to have it. Sonny does too, she knows, but she’s younger and she hasn’t suffered through as much drama or time off from injury, so it’s a little easier for her to gripe from time to time. 

“Oooh, maybe we should invite Tobin out to get some action shots!” Kelley suggests, leaning forward in the way that tells Christen that she’s had what she deems a brilliant idea. 

From experience, Christen knows that Kelley’s brilliant ideas are often anything but. In college more than one of Kelley’s brilliant ideas had landed both her and Christen in trouble, which was a little ironic because Christen had only ever tagged along in an attempt to keep Kelley OUT of trouble. Christen also knows, from experience, that once Kelley has grabbed hold of an idea, it’s almost impossible to get her to drop it. She tries anyway. “No.”

Kelley balks. “What? Why ‘no’?”

Christen wracks her brain for good reasons. “We have photographers that already do that.”

“So one more is bad? Besides, we could let her get in with the team in a way we don’t let people at camp often. Think of the cool shots she could get,” Kelley counters. 

“We’d have to pay her,” Christen points out. 

“And? She takes good photos. She’s worth it,” Kelley retorts. 

“We haven’t even seen the finished product of the shoot we literally just left,” Christen argues, but it’s a weak argument at best, and she knows it. 

“We’ve seen her portfolio,” Kelley replies, waving it away. 

“Okay, but we don’t get to decide how US Soccer spends its money. If we did, we’d have equal pay already,” Christen points out. 

“So we hire her out of pocket. I’m pretty sure we can get Jill to go for giving her the access. Some of us pool our money together and have her come out for a week of camp? Even if it’s just an hour a day.” 

“I like it. I’m in,” Sonny volunteers. 

“She’s probably busy. She said she has shoots tomorrow,” Christen says, not really sure why she’s fighting this idea so hard. It’s not like she wouldn’t like to see Tobin again. She DOES, actually, want to see her again. She wants to maybe have a conversation with her, and not while she’s naked. She wants to (maybe) find out what the woman behind the camera is really like. 

Which is silly, she reminds herself, for all of the reasons she’s already mentioned. She doesn’t actually have time to get to know people. Not really. Not on the level she thinks maybe she wants to get to know Tobin. She already gets to see her family way less than she’d like. They all do. Between practices and games and camps and travel and tournaments and interviews and the fight for equal pay...There just aren’t enough hours in a day as it is. It’s not really a coincidence that for all of them, their best friends are those they play or have played with. That or they’re friends from childhood, the type that you build that bond with before life becomes chaos, who understand that you will disappear from their lives for long stretches, but when you’re back together it’s just like it always was. There isn’t time to form new deep friendships. There isn’t time to date with the intention of cultivating a proper relationship. Not now. Not at this stage in her life. 

“Christen, you are one of my oldest friends and one of my best friends, but, girl, you gotta put yourself out there sometimes!” Kelley advises. 

Maybe she’s right. Maybe she isn’t. Christen doesn’t want to think about it right now. Right now she wants to get in the headspace for camp. She wants to focus on showing Jill what she’s got. She wants to prove that she deserves to start every once in a frickin’ while. So maybe it’s a cop out, but she replies, “Oh yeah? And when was the last time you went on a date, Kel?” 

Kelley sighs, like Christen knew she would, because it’s been at least six months for her. “Fine. Be closed off and emotionally unavailable. I’m going to make friends with the hot photographer while she shoots us in camp next week.” 

“Nice!” Sonny says from the back, her grin evident in her voice. “Same!”

Christen groans. “Pull over,” she instructs. “I’d rather walk.”

Kelley laughs and ignores her. Christen shakes her head and pulls her headphones out of her bag. If she can’t escape them, she can at least ignore them. She puts on her workout playlist, already knowing she’s going to hit up the hotel gym when they get back because she has way too much energy and not nearly enough options to work it out tonight, and she settles into her seat, leaning her forehead against the cool glass of the window as the streets of Portland pass by. She doesn’t take in the rows of cute shops or the sort of small town/big city mashup vibe that it’s got going on. Instead, kind brown eyes and a wide smile float before her eyes and she can’t quite find it in herself to chase them away. 

  
  
  


“You think she does wedding photography?” Ashlyn asks in between bites of pancakes slathered in so much syrup that it’s created a sort of moat on her plate. 

Christen looks up, unsure of who exactly Ash is talking to, if anyone at all. “Who?”

“Tobin,” Ash replies as if it’s the most obvious answer in the world. “I bet she’d take good wedding pictures. She seems like she’s got a really good eye,” Ash continues. 

Christen glances across the table at Ali to see if she’s listening. 

“She’d definitely take good wedding photos,” Sammy chimes in. “I’m kinda bummed we didn’t meet her before my wedding.”

Christen rolls her eyes. “Sammy your wedding photos are gorgeous!”

Sammy grins. “They are, huh? Still…”

It’s possible that her teammates are just trying to annoy her to throw her off her game today. Maybe they’re just tired that she keeps beating them in sprints at practice. 

Kelley takes a seat on Christen’s other side, forcing Alex to scoot down a bit. Pancakes and bacon are piled high on her plate. “God, I love a continental breakfast. What’re we talking about?” 

Christen shoots Kelley a glare. “As if you don’t know.” 

“Wedding photography,” Ash informs Kelley over Christen’s head. 

Christen sits up a little straighter, knowing that her height will make it difficult for them to do that more. 

“Oooooh! I didn’t know, but now I do! You guys should ask Tobin!” 

If there wasn’t a plate of food in front of her, Christen is sure that she would be banging her head on the table right now. Seriously, why was she friends with these people? 

“That’s what I was just thinking about. What do you think, babe?” Ash turns to Ali, who at least appears to seriously consider the question rather than just immediately answering yes to annoy Christen. 

“I think we should definitely ask if she’s done weddings and has any photos we can look at. She had a great demeanor. Really easy going. You know she wouldn’t be super intrusive. Plus, if we’re trusting her to keep pictures of us naked private, then you know she’s not the type to leak pictures to the tabloids,” Ali replies, and Christen kind of hates that she has a relatively well-thought-out answer with really valid points for contemplating hiring Tobin. 

“Yeah, but you guys are getting married in Orlando, aren’t you?” Christen decides it’s time to chime in. 

Ash and Ali shrug. “We haven’t worked out the details yet. We’re still checking out venues. Anyway, she’d just need to bring a camera. Photographers travel all the time. We could tell her expenses included.”

“See? Portable profession,” Kelley says with a grin that speaks volumes (and Christen wants to ignore all of them). “Anyway, you can ask her about it when we hire her to take some photos of camp. I was gonna call her later.” She says this far louder than necessary, and Christen knows it’s just so that everyone else will overhear. 

Christen expects some surprise. She expects some push back. Camp is their time. They need to focus. They need to be in their little bubble so that they can work on being the best they can be. They need to be improving every day so that by the time the next tournament kicks off they’re nearing the top of their game, and then they need to push even further. They don’t need some new face in the mix asking questions and getting in the way with a camera in hand (no matter how gorgeous that face may be). 

Instead, faces light up around the room. 

“Ooooh!” Rose calls from one table over. “That’s awesome!” 

“Right? I bet she takes some sick action shots,” Sonny agrees. 

“I’d be down,” Julie says from the table behind Christen. “Maybe we could even include a group shot of us clothed in the calendar.” 

“Or in our sports bras and shorts? Like the cover? So people don’t get us naked right off the bat?” Mal, of all people, chimes in. Mal who is practically a child still. Mal who Christen has taken under her wing and tried to mentor. 

Christen shoots her a dirty look. 

“Plus, it’s always cool to see the moments photographers capture of the action,” Lindsey says from her spot next to Sonny. 

Honestly, Christen is feeling a little ganged up on. Okay, maybe none of them are really looking at her, or even indicating in any way that they’d be doing this on her behalf, but she’d read the group chat...Okay, she’d skimmed it. Apart from Carli, who hated group chats, everyone had found Kelley and Sonny’s (highly inaccurate) accounts of Christen’s part of the photoshoot hilarious. 

Christen looks around the room and spots Carli. Surely she’ll be the voice of reason. 

“Carli, don’t you think we should just focus at camp?” Christen asks, just the tiniest hint of desperation in her voice. 

Carli frowns for a moment, and Christen thinks she’s got it, she finally has a supporter, but then Carli shrugs. “I don’t see how she’d get in the way of our focus. I think it would be fine. Besides, our job is to block out the distractions and keep our heads in the game. We’ll have to pay out of pocket, though.”

Christen’s shoulders slump, knowing she’s lost as Kelley says, “Yeah, I was thinking we could all chip in. Keep her around for like a week and see what she captures? Maybe when US Soccer sees what she comes up with they’ll buy some of the rights for promo material and we’ll get some of our money back.”

She throws her hands up. “Fine. If you guys really want to let in an outsider, fine.”

The smug grins that cross the table around her do not escape her attention. She really needs to rethink this whole “being friends with her teammates” thing. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The New Kids go through some photos and Tobin finds herself wishing for less annoying friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got written quicker (and turned out longer) than I thought. Hope you like it!

“I can’t believe you made us reschedule,” Amy plops down in the stool across the kitchen counter from Tobin, her expression turning less critical as Tobin sets a full glass of wine down in front of her. 

“I didn’t cause the accident that made me barely move a mile in an hour last night!” Tobin replies defensively. “Besides, I said you guys could hang out here without me.”

“That’s no fun. We wanted to see naked ladies,” Lauren replies with a teasing grin. She’s always been the calmer between Tobin’s two best friends, and she’d been less bothered by the abrupt change of plans last night. 

“Says my married, straight best friend,” Tobin shoots back with an amused grin. 

“Best friends. Plural,” Amy corrects. “We both wanted to see naked ladies.”

“Pervs,” Tobin accuses in a teasing tone of voice. 

“Look, I may be straight, but soccer players are hot and this is the US Women’s National Team we’re talking about!” Lauren says, stressing each word of the team’s name. 

Tobin knows. She gets it. Her friends had been almost more excited than she was when she’d gotten the gig. She hadn’t really thought she would, especially based all the way up in Portland, but there had been no real harm in going for the job. It was the opportunity of a lifetime, really, and she hopes it will bring in more clients. Maybe even more bigger clients. Maybe someone will pay her to travel the world and take pictures someday. It’s a dream, and this gig seemed like a good start. Sure she had three shoots back-to-back this morning, but apart from that and the two she has booked for next weekend, her schedule is a little sparse right now. She’s thought about moving to LA and trying to focus more on big contracts, but she just loves Portland so much, the vibe, the artistic atmosphere. She wouldn’t mind traveling for shoots, but she can’t imagine anywhere else being home base at this point. 

“So are you going to show us some pictures? Or are you going to make us beg?” Amy interrupts Tobin’s thoughts, and Tobin chuckles and rolls her eyes. 

“Okay, okay! Either of you want to see the newborn photos I shot this morning?” she suggests, knowing the answer. “He was a cutie!”

“Newborns all look like mini wrinkled old guys, and I say this as someone who thinks that my newborns were the most gorgeous things ever. It’s still true,” Amy replies. 

“Nah, some of them look like aliens,” Lauren muses, and Tobin has to laugh out loud at that. 

There’s a certain element of truth to it, but she loves the newborn shoots. They’re just so tiny and fragile and the parents are trusting her to capture these fleeting moments before they’re walking and talking and asking for the car keys so they can go on dates. There’s something special about it. Plus the baby cuddles are pretty sweet. She may not have kids of her own, but she loves them, and being an aunt, both to her sister’s kids and an honorary one to Lauren and Amy’s kids, is one of her favorite jobs in the world. 

“We want the naked soccer players. And we want to hear all about the shoot,” Amy declares. 

“Did you tell them you play?” Lauren asks as Tobin moves to pull up her laptop. 

“Did you tell them you’re the nutmeg queen?” Amy asks, making Tobin laugh. 

“Did you let on that you’re a fan or were you able to play it cool?”

“Who was the hottest?” Amy throws out, and it’s that question that lodges a lump uncomfortably in Tobin’s throat. 

She takes a big swallow, trying to force it down, but to no avail. 

“Ooooh! Oooh! Did you get anyone’s number?” Amy adds. 

Tobin rolls her eyes. “I already have Alex and Megan’s contact info.” 

“Not what I meant,” Amy points out, and yes, Tobin is aware, but that is definitely NOT why she took the job. 

She sighs as she opens up the right folder and clicks open on the first picture. She’d gone through them a little last night, but largely hasn’t touched them. 

(She won’t admit that she spent more than a little time looking at a picture of Christen, mesmerized by her green eyes, glowing skin, and kind smile.)

“They’re rough,” she reminds her friends, although it’s hardly the first time they’ve seen her rough photos, and she does her best to edit as little as possible, preferring to capture the moment as it exists. 

Amy and Lauren wave her off and crowd around the screen. 

“Wow, look at her arm muscles!” Lauren declares. 

Tobin nods. “Goalie muscles.”

“Alyssa Naeher, right?” Amy asks. 

Tobin nods again. 

“Damn! Can you ask her what her workout routine is for me?” Amy requests. 

Tobin rolls her eyes. “No.”

Amy sticks out her tongue. “Spoil sport. And don’t think I haven’t noticed that you haven’t answered a single one of our other questions.”

Tobin sighs and flips through the next few pictures, making mental notes in her head which ones the lighting worked out best in or which ones are framed just perfectly. “I did NOT tell them I play because I don’t. Not at that level. I did not mention being the nutmeg queen because you two are the only ones that call me that -” 

“Not true!” Amy argues. “The rest of the Riveters do too!”

Tobin rolls her eyes again. It’s not entirely inaccurate, but being the nutmeg queen of their adult recreational club team is not the same as being a pro player. Not by a longshot. 

“And no I did not get anyone’s number in the way that you mean,” Tobin finishes answering as if she hadn’t been interrupted at all. 

“And the hottest player was?” Amy prompts. 

Tobin cringes, wishing that Amy had forgotten that question. 

“Ooh, that’s a good one,” Lauren says, pointing to the screen as Tobin flips through the last few of Alyssa. 

Tobin nods her agreement. It was her favorite pose for her: gloves on, holding the ball covering her chest, fierce determination on her face, arms flexing, showing off their strength, hips turned just enough to keep it modest (or at least as modest as a shot like this got) which also highlighted the muscles in her side and back. 

“Don’t distract her,” Amy scolds. “Dish, Tobes.” 

Tobin shrugs as curly black hair and green eyes swim before her vision. “They were all hot.”

“Awwww, your poor gay heart must have been overwhelmed,” Amy teases. 

“No. I was fine. Because I am a professional. One who does not spend her photoshoots ogling the subject of them.” 

Amy wrinkles her nose. “Where’s the fun in that?” 

Tobin elbows her in the side and she cracks up. 

They go through the next few players pretty quickly, with Amy and Lauren commenting on their favorite shots and assessing each person individually. (“She looks so young, is she really young?” about Mal. “Is she super tall or is it just the angle?” about Sammy. “She’s such a badass,” about Becky.)

When they hit Kelley, Tobin resists the urge to roll her eyes. She was entertaining, definitely, but also a pain in the ass. Tobin had liked her, despite herself. She’s the type of person Tobin could see herself being friends with. In another life. Where one of them isn’t a world famous pro-athlete. 

“Oooh, she’s making you smile. And she’s pretty damn hot! I mean look at that ass!” Amy exclaims. 

Tobin realizes that Amy’s right and instantly tames the grin that had turned up the corners of her mouth. “She’s funny, but not my type. Besides, I kind of got vibes that there was something going on between her and Alex.”

“Alex Morgan?” Lauren gapes. “No way. She’s straight, isn’t she?” 

Tobin shrugs. Alex has essentially been the poster girl for US women’s soccer for years now. Tobin can’t begin to imagine the type of pressure that must put on her to project the perfect persona. Queer probably didn’t fit in that. Honestly Tobin had been surprised to find out she was so down-to-earth. 

“But O’Hara’s gay?” Amy pries. 

Again Tobin shrugs. She thinks so, but it’s speculation. “It’s not like as they stepped up for their pictures and stripped down naked I was grilling them on their sexuality,” Tobin points out. 

“Okay, fair. It’d be kind of weird if you did,” Lauren acknowledges. 

“Exactly.” 

They’re through Morgan Brian, Abby Dahlkemper, and Julie Ertz before her friends decide to bring up dating and sexuality again, and honestly Tobin wishes that they’d drop it. Her stomach is twisting in knots each player closer to Christen that they get as it is, just at the thought of seeing her pictures again. She almost doesn’t want to share Christen’s, which is stupid, she knows, as at least one will be going on a calendar that will be available for sale to the whole world. 

“Okay, she gives off major not straight vibes,” Amy says, pointing at a picture of Lindsey Horan. 

Tobin gives her a skeptical look. “Says my very straight friend.”

“Straight people can have gaydar!” Amy replies defensively. 

Tobin’s look turns even more skeptical. 

Amy narrows her eyes. “Okay Miss Not Straight In The Slightest, what kind of vibes did YOU get off of Lindsey Horan?”

Tobin sighs and shrugs. “Bi would be my guess, but it’s just a guess.”

“Ha!” Amy grins triumphantly and Lauren rolls her eyes. 

“All right, children, we’re supposed to be going through the pictures here,” Lauren admonishes. 

“Yes. Thank you,” Tobin replies, flipping over to Carli Lloyd’s photos. 

They don’t make it as far this time, Amy cutting in as soon as they hit Ali Krieger. 

“Wait, she’s gay right?” 

“And taken,” Tobin nips her thought in the bud. “By Ashlyn Harris. They’re very in love and very cute.”

“Try not to sound so jealous,” Amy advises. 

Tobin glares. “I’m not jealous.”

It’s a small lie. Not really a lie at all. She isn’t jealous so much as she thinks it would be nice to have what they have someday. It’s hard, though. First there’s the whole meeting people thing, then the awkward getting to know people phase, then the whole chemistry aspect to it, and the truth is that Tobin doesn’t have the time (or energy) to devote to dating. Not really. Not when she’s trying to run her own business and be able to afford her studio space and that new lens she’s had her eyes on for a few months. She should be able to get it as soon as the check clears from US Soccer. Still, she hadn’t commanded maybe as big of a paycheck as she could have from them because she wanted to make sure as much money as possible was able to go to the charity. 

“Oh my god, she’s a baby! Is she even old enough to drink?” Lauren asks when Tobin hits Tierna’s pictures next. 

Tobin shakes her head. 

“Yet she’s already posed naked for a calendar. Good for her,” Amy comments. 

“Hey, now I’ve had a kid and am in my thirties, I’m wishing someone had taken some tasteful naked pictures of me in my early twenties. I’d kill to have the body I had back then.”

“Amen,” Amy echoes the sentiment. 

Tobin rolls her eyes. “You’re both still hot.” They are, too. She’s not just saying it. They worked hard to get back in shape after their babies. They work hard to maintain their athleticism. 

“Are you hitting on us?” Amy teases. “Because I think that ship sailed a long time ago.”

“That ship never got afloat,” Lauren amends. 

“That ship never got conceptualized,” Tobin corrects. 

Alex’s pictures draw just as many comments as she’d anticipated. She’d been a pro at the photoshoot, her experience with Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition and her various other photoshoots shining through in her ease in front of the camera. Her smile is easy and genuine in her photos. She had been poised and taken direction so well. Honestly she was a dream client.

Lauren and Amy start to argue over which photo of her is the best and Tobin just decides to skip on ahead because honestly any of Alex’s photos will work fine for the calendar. She’s tempted to just let Alex pick. 

“Oooh! She gives off not-straight vibes!” Amy gets distracted from the argument as soon as Tobin flips to Sonny. 

Amy’s not wrong, but Tobin doesn’t need to tell her that. 

“She’s not my type,” she says instead. 

“Cute and a soccer player? And look at those abs. How is she not your type?” Amy asks incredulously. 

Tobin shrugs. It’s hard to put words to it. “Sonny’s too -”

“Ooooh. Sonny, huh? Calling her by a nickname already,” Amy teases. 

“Everyone called her Sonny and she insisted I did too,” Tobin explains. “She’s a goof. A lot of fun, and, okay, clearly attractive, but...I need someone…I don’t know. More put together, I guess.” 

“Someone who will make you keep a schedule,” Lauren says knowingly. 

“I mean, that’s not necessarily what I meant, but...yeah, I guess I could use a little better organization in my life.”

“Sweetie, I mean this as lovingly as possible, but it’s no small miracle that you’ve been able to become as successful as you have in your business given your lack of organization. It’s a real testament to your artistic eye and your skill with a camera, because it is not your ability to wake up early and plan your day.” Lauren’s tone is gentle, but if Tobin didn’t know how much love was laced into each word she might be mildly offended. 

Only mildly, though. Lauren’s, unfortunately, not wrong. 

Megan Rapinoe gets a rousing chorus of “Pinoe!” from her friends that brings a smile to Tobin’s face. They all respect the stances she’s taken politically and the voice she’s given to the fight for equal pay for women. Really that the whole team has given to that fight. It’s just one small part of why Tobin had actually been really excited to work with them. 

“She is exactly as cool as you think she’d be,” Tobin informs them. 

As they make their way through Rose (“Oh my god, another baby! How are they even old enough to play soccer?”), Andi (“She’s so fierce on the field.”), Ashlyn (“She looks hot AND badass. I would.”), and then the couple shots of Ali and Ashlyn together (“You weren’t kidding! They are gorgeous together and so obviously in love!”) Tobin finds herself feeling a little antsy. She’s shifting in her chair more often and her fingers are drumming on the table as her friends critique the pictures and the players. She knows who’s coming. She knows who the last photos will be of. She’s not sure she’s ready to see them. 

That’s stupid, though. It’s her job to see them. It’s her job to edit and analyze them with a professional eye. It’s literally what she was hired to do. She was definitely not hired to get a crush on some soccer player she barely knows (who had the most dazzling smile she’s ever seen). 

Crystal gets some very complimentary exclamations, and Tobin has to admit that she captured the absolute powerhouse that is Crystal Dunn pretty well. Her toned muscles highlighted perfectly by the lighting, the fierce determination on her face in one picture easily replaced by a warm grin in the next. 

The pictures of Allie make Tobin grin. She’d really liked her. She’d had great energy and just given off this genuinely friendly vibe that had made Tobin almost wish that they could become friends. Of course Amy takes her smile the wrong way. 

“Ooooh, so you like this one,” Amy accuses. 

Tobin shakes her head quickly. “Not like that.”

“She’s the first one that’s made you smile like that,” Lauren observes. 

“Guys, I swear, she was cool, but like in a friend kind of way.”

“Sure. I photograph all my friends naked,” Amy replies. 

“I WAS HIRED TO DO A JOB!” Tobin reminds her, exasperation creeping into her voice. 

“Okay, okay. I’m just saying…”

Tobin makes a mental note of Allie’s two best pictures, and goes on to Adrianna Franch. She’d been pretty pleased with these, too. Actually all of the goalie pictures had been fun. They’re usually so much more covered up than their teammates. Tobin had had to actually keep from gawking at Alyssa Naeher’s arm muscles when she’d taken off the robe. The strength of the goalies was different than the others and they’d gotten to do different poses to showcase that. The pictures had come out pretty well, if Tobin did say so herself. 

Tobin’s aware, as they flip through Jess’s pictures, that her heart has sped up a little. She has to control her reactions, though. She absolutely cannot show how attractive she finds Christen on her face or her friends are going to pounce like a pride of hungry lions. Tobin can see the previews of Christen’s pictures coming up along the bottom, and as the first one gets closer, she finds it harder and harder to swallow. 

_ Stop being ridiculous _ , she thinks.  _ Stop being scared to show Christen’s pictures to your best friends _ . 

She takes a deep breath at Jess’s last picture, then flips to Christen. 

She can’t help her quick exhale. Just seeing a picture of Christen makes her feel like all of the air has been robbed from her lungs. She can hear her gentle, melodic giggle, her soft voice. She can feel the warmth of her touch. 

“Wow,” Lauren says quietly beside her. 

Tobin knows. She KNOWS she’s reacted too strongly. She’d tried to control it and she’s failed miserably. She braces for the teasing to ensue. 

“Damn,” Amy comments on her other side. 

Yep, any second now they’re going to start giving her shit. She can feel it. 

“Who is she again?” Lauren asks. 

“Christen Press,” Tobin replies a little too quickly. She glances at Lauren to see if she noticed, but Lauren’s eyes are glued to the screen. 

She looks the other way to see Amy’s eyes focused on the picture too. 

_ Maybe Christen just has that effect on everyone, _ Tobin thinks. 

“She’s giving you MAJOR heart eyes,” Amy finally says. 

Tobin looks at the picture. “What?” 

Her heart starts beating a little faster and she looks at the picture. There’s a smile on Christen’s face that’s somewhere between flirty and sultry, okay, she’ll give them that, and her eyes are bright and clear and focussed...On the camera, though. 

“She’s posing FOR THE CAMERA,” Tobin argues. The expression isn’t for her. The look (that makes her mouth go dry and something else pool warm in her belly) is not specifically for her. It’s for the picture. 

“It’s a very convincing pose,” Lauren murmurs, not sounding convinced of Tobin’s words at all. 

“THAT is NOT a POSE,” Amy counters. “THAT is her attempting to seduce you.”

Tobin’s heart skips a beat. 

“She’s not. She’s seducing the camera to make a good picture,” Tobin counters. 

“Tobes, you know we love you, she is 100% trying to seduce the woman behind the camera,” Lauren sides with Amy. 

If Tobin weren’t so thrown by the idea, she might glare at them for ganging up on her, but her mind’s too busy reeling at the mere suggestion of it. She’s replaying their conversations, the way she’d made an utter fool of herself, the whole “fate” incident, Kelley’s teasing. She’d been bumbling and more obvious than she’d have liked about her attraction, but Christen hadn’t seemed to notice, even if Kelley definitely had, and she definitely hadn’t seemed to return the interest. 

“She’s - That’s not - Christen isn’t -”

“Oh my God, you’re blushing!” 

Tobin DOES glare at Amy then. 

“I’m not.”

“You are. A lot,” Lauren counters. “I’m not sure I’ve ever really seen you blush, actually.”

“Tobin has a crush!” Amy says with gleeful delight. 

“I do not!” Tobin lies through her teeth with as much determination as she can muster. 

“Well, either you two are into each other, or she’s magical in front of the camera, because these pictures are literally the best you’ve ever taken,” Lauren says, flipping through the next few. 

Tobin slams her laptop shut a little harder than she means to, and she’s working up to a solid retort when her phone rings. 

“Thank God,” she mutters as she dives for it and steps away from the scrutinizing gaze of her supposedly best friends. 

A number she doesn’t recognize flashes across her phone, but that’s not really all that unusual. Despite that there’s a “Schedule a Session” online booking feature on her website, plenty of people would rather call her to set something up. 

“Hello, this is Tobin, how can I help you?” she answers in her most professional voice. 

“Wow, so formal after you’ve seen me naked and everything. I don’t know if that’s kinda hot or just really weird.” 

It takes Tobin a second to place the voice and when she does she balks. “Kelley?” 

She sees her friends mouth “Kelley?” at each other. 

“Ding ding ding! Get the lady a prize! Oh, wait, I guess I’m the prize.”

“What?” Tobin asks, her voice going up in pitch as she starts to panic that she’d misinterpreted Kelley’s teasing. 

“Okay, that came out wrong. I’m calling to offer you a job. Or hire you for a gig, I guess,” Kelley amends. 

Tobin’s brows furrow and her confusion only settles more firmly into place. “Didn’t I just shoot you guys?”

“Yes. This is a different job. Keep up, Tobito.” 

_ Tobito? _ she thinks, but she doesn’t bother asking because she’s already confused enough as it is. “Umm...Okay?” she hazards. 

“We want you to come be our photographer at camp for the next week. Get the real inside look. How are you at action shots?”

“I’ve shot some surf contests and some soccer games, but nothing professionally,” Tobin admits. 

“So you have experience, is what you’re saying,” Kelley says, and Tobin gets the impression that she’s misinterpreting what she said on purpose. “Great. So I looked up your rates on your website and we kinda extrapolated out from your event fee, multiplying it by seven. Does that sound fair? Because obviously we don’t expect you to shoot us like nonstop all day for seven days. Basically we want you to get us in training, but also downtime, like some candid portraits and stuff maybe?”

“US Soccer wants candid portraits?” Tobin asks, still feeling more lost than not. 

“Not exactly, no. We do. Us players. We liked you, you got along well with all of us, though maybe some even more than others, and you weren’t intrusive even though we were stripped down to our birthday suits. You’d be like an honorary team member for the week and at the end we’d all have some pretty sweet pics to commemorate our time at camp and then maybe, possibly, after US Soccer sees how fuckin’ awesome the pictures are, my guess is they’ll pay for the rights to some for promotional materials and the like.”

Tobin frowns, unsure of how much Kelley has really thought this through. Still, a gig for a week straight at the price point Kelley mentioned? She’d be crazy to turn it down. Besides, she’d liked the team. She wouldn’t mind hanging out with them again. 

(She tries not to think about how she REALLY wouldn’t mind seeing Christen again. The prospect of a whole week with her, it - 

It’s not what she should be thinking about right now.)

“Umm...When would you want me to start? My schedule’s pretty open, but I might need to rearrange a handful of half hour family sessions.”

“Could you start tomorrow?” Kelley asks. 

Tobin’s eyes go wide and she’s definitely NOT thinking about the prospect of seeing Christen Press again as soon as tomorrow. Nope. Not. For sure not. “Y-yeah. Sure. What time?” 

“I will text you deets. Also add my number to your phone. K, thanks. See you tomorrow!”

“Wait!” Tobin practically shouts it as an important question occurs to her. “If US Soccer doesn’t want this, who’s paying?”

“We are. We’re pooling funds.”

Tobin’s eyes go even wider. “You the players?”

“Yep! Okay, so we’ll see you tomorrow morning. Text you soon! Bye!”

“Bye,” Tobin mumbles. She puts her phone down without really paying attention and it falls off the edge of the table with a thud. “Shit!” she mutters, picking it back up quickly, glad to see it’s not broken. 

“Soooooo, why was Kelley O’Hara calling you?” Amy asks with a massive grin. 

“Apparently to hire me,” Tobin replies, feeling completely overwhelmed. “For the team.”

The look of confusion that spreads across Lauren’s face and the surprise etched on Amy’s makes Tobin feel a little bit better. 

“Didn’t you just do a job for them?” Amy asks. 

Tobin rolls her eyes, understanding slightly better why Kelley had had the response to that that she had. “This is a new one. Starting tomorrow. Going all week.”

“All week? Wow! That’s huge!” Lauren gapes. She rushes Tobin and gives her a tight hug. “That’s amazing! See? I knew this US Women’s National Team gig would be good!” 

“They must have really liked you,” Amy says, joining the hug. “Hey, now you can flirt with Heart Eyes Press for a whole week! And then you can ask her out. And then you can go on dates. And then you can have little gorgeous babies and Ryan and Luke and Jrue can be their cool older cousins. And -”

“And you can stop planning the rest of my life now,” Tobin cuts her off, and Amy’s pouting when she steps away from the hug. 

Tobin detangles herself from Lauren’s arms and gives herself a little shake, still not quite believing what’s going on (or Amy’s ridiculous fantasy of her life, for that matter). 

“Anyway, there are no heart eyes. I keep telling you guys.” 

Amy and Lauren exchange a look. 

“Okay, if you say so,” Amy replies. 

“Look, we’ll drop it on one condition,” Lauren says, and Tobin looks at her expectantly. “You make sure you enjoy the next week.”

Tobin grins. A week of watching pro soccer players at camp and hanging out with the most beautiful woman she’s ever met? That’s something she should have no problem enjoying. “Deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise there will be more actual Preath interactions next chapter!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen thought she was ready for Tobin to photograph them at training. She was not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. I hope you all think it was worth the wait. Drop a comment if you do!

“Wow, Chris, you look really nice today,” Becky comments as she sits down across the aisle from her on the bus. She leans in a little closer, blocking Abby in the process. “Are you wearing extra makeup today?”

Christen shifts uncomfortably in her seat. She didn’t think it was that noticeable. She looks at Abby, expecting her to be impatient about getting to her seat, but Abby looks like she’s waiting on Christen’s answer. 

“Yes!” Kelley volunteers gleefully when Christen’s answer isn’t forthcoming. 

“This wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain photographer coming to camp today, would it?” Becky asks.

Christen glares. Becky, of all people. Becky who is so self-assured and professional and such a backbone of the team. Becky is joining in on this? “No,” she replies defensively. 

She catches Kelley nodding vigorously, a smirk on her face, out of the corner of her eye, and Christen smacks her in the arm without turning to face her fully. 

“I just felt like looking nice today. For me,” Christen adds. 

Becky leans back into her seat, an expression on her face that says that she’s not fully convinced, and Abby laughs as she moves past. 

“Looking nice for you so you can work on getting you laid,” Lindsey mutters a little too loudly from the seat behind her. 

Christen doesn’t even turn around. She simply raises her hand above the top of the seat and gives Lindsey the finger. She hears Sonny giggle and give Lindsey a high five. 

“You all suck,” Christen mumbles, putting in her headphones so she can tune out any remaining conversation about this topic. 

It’s not a long way to Providence Park, and that’s fortunate for two reasons, as far as Christen is concerned: 1) it gives her teammates less time to give her a hard time before they’re forced to focus on doing their actual jobs and 2) it means she has less time for this anxiety that seems to have taken root in her stomach to grow. 

She’s not sure why she’s feeling so anxious. Camps CAN be anxiety inducing because somewhere in the back of your mind you’re always thinking about making the cut for the actual team that’s going to go to the next game or the next tournament, but camps are also a lot of fun and a great place to work on technique and overall improve your game. Christen LIKES camps. She likes the game. No, she loves the game. It’s her livelihood and her passion all rolled into one and she feels blessed every day that she gets to play it. 

Today, though, the blessings feel kind of overwhelmed by her nerves. 

Kelley nudges Christen as they get off the bus, and Christen pulls her headphones down around her neck and looks at her. 

“Look who’s here,” Kelley indicates with her head, and Christen follows her gaze. 

Her breath catches in her throat, even though she’d anticipated seeing her today. Tobin’s leaning against her car in an effortlessly cool kind of way, her long hair down and soft around her face, and as Christen watches, she pushes it back, running her fingers through it, and squinting in their direction. A smile spreads across her face and it’s honestly the most contagious smile Christen’s ever seen. She couldn’t not smile in return if she tried. 

_ How is it fair that someone who prefers to be behind the camera is so damn gorgeous? _ she thinks. 

Tobin pushes off of her car and bends down to pick up a large black bag that she lugs easily over her shoulder, suggesting muscles that her oversized white T-shirt from the photoshoot had only hinted at. Tobin raises a hand in greeting (at all of them, Christen reminds herself) as she heads towards them. 

Christen swallows hard. Why does her mouth feel suddenly dry? She takes a deep breath, and then Tobin is saying, “Hi. I was a little early.”

Kelley shoots Christen a look that she’d rather not decipher, then steps forward to meet Tobin, hand outstretched. 

“Nice to see you again. Almost like...fate.”

Christen can’t quite see Tobin’s face through Kelley, but just in case she’s not glaring at Kelley, Christen decides she should too. 

Obviously Tobin had been trying to say fine and great and her mouth had mashed the two. It happens to everyone sometimes. It certainly happened to Christen. Kelley didn’t have to keep teasing her for it. 

“Almost like you hired me,” Tobin replies evenly, and Christen admires her restraint at not just saying “Shut up!”

“So if you follow us to the locker room, Chris can maybe show you around and walk you through what we’re apt to do today, and then you can set up whatever you need to?”

Christen chokes on the sip of water she’d just taken at the mention of her name. She splutters and coughs and Kelley at least has the decency to look slightly ashamed, but Tobin moves quickly to her side and pats her on the back, her eyes wide and her hands warm. 

“Are you okay?” Tobin’s asking, concern etched into her voice. Her hair falls forward as she bends over to try to look Christen in the face and it tickles Christen’s cheek, setting off a new wave of coughs as she almost chokes again. 

In case watching her at the shoot the other day hadn’t provided enough evidence, here she was continuing to show what a good person she is. 

It does not make it easier for Christen to stop choking. 

“I’m fine,” she manages to choke what feels like an unreasonably long amount of time later, but in actuality was probably only about a minute. 

Tobin doesn’t look convinced, but she takes a step back and drops her hand to her side, and the distance does make it a little easier for Christen to even out her breathing. Christen turns hard eyes on Kelley. “I’m going to what now?”

Kelley grins. “Show Tobin around. Get her acquainted with how camp works. Stuff like that.”

“I don’t remember volunteering,” Christen replies, realizing too late just how that probably sounds to Tobin. 

Tobin takes another step back and scrunches up her nose a little. “It’s fine. You don’t have to. I’m sure I can figure stuff out,” Tobin’s saying, and Christen instantly feels like an asshole. 

“No! I want to!” she counters, a little too eagerly. She ignores the incredibly smug look on Kelley’s face, too focused on the wavering uncertainty on Tobin’s. 

Tobin shakes her head. “Really, it’s fine. There are so many of you to ask if I have a question, anyway…” she trails off, her brown eyes fixed on a point on the ground just to the right of Christen. 

“Hey,” Christen says, reaching out before she’s properly thought it through. Heat floods up through her fingertips when they touch Tobin’s arms, running through her and settling low in her abdomen. “Honestly, I want to. I just wanted Kelley to know she was a jerk for assuming rather than asking. It was nothing about you. Promise.”

Tobin’s eyes come up to meet hers, studying them so intensely for a moment that Christen’s not entirely sure she can breathe, and then she grins and breaks eye contact, adjusting the bag on her shoulder. “Okay, then, Christen. Lead the way.”

Christen grins back and heads towards the locker rooms with Tobin right beside her, their strides easily matching. 

She wouldn’t put money on it, but she swears she hears Kelley say, “Too easy,” to Alex and Allie as they fall into step behind them. 

  
  
  


For all of the easy confidence Tobin projected at her studio, behind the camera, she seems almost shy here in their space. Her eyes dart around as if she’s not sure exactly where she’s allowed to look as the ladies begin to get changed. It’s funny, really, seeing as she’s seen them all naked (and has the photos to prove it), and now they’re pulling on shorts and switching shirts while fully covered in sports bras, and Tobin is looking at the signs near the ceiling and the spots on the bench in front of her. Anywhere but specifically at someone. 

It’s kind of cute. 

Christen giggles as she pulls her own USWNT practice shirt over her head, and Tobin looks at her in surprise. Her eyes dip down as the shirt falls, and Christen wonders briefly if she caught a glimpse of her abs, but Tobin’s eyes are back on her face so quickly that she shrugs it off. “You’ve seen us naked. I think it’s fine if you see us in sports bras,” Christen teases. 

She’s rewarded by a little half smile and a chuckle from Tobin who nods. “Yeah, I guess. I just...It’s different being here, behind the scenes. I dunno. I’ve only ever seen this place from the stands.”

Christen isn’t sure why the comment surprises her, but it does. “You’ve come to games here?”

“Oh yeah, big Timbers and Thorns fan,” Tobin declares, and Lindsey and Sonny whoop from nearby and AD gives her two thumbs up and a broad grin. 

“Not the Royals?” Christen can’t help asking, raising an eyebrow at Tobin. 

Tobin’s cheeks flush an attractive shade of pink. “Oh, I, um, well, I mean, I’m Portland based. This is home, you know? But the Royals are great. I love the Royals. They’re my second favorite team.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll fix that,” Kelley says, still wearing just her sports bra and her shorts, in no hurry to cover up, as per usual. 

Crystal puts on some music and she and Sonny start dancing. Within minutes Rose has joined her and dragged Sammy with her. Kelley jumps in, too, and the dancing gets simultaneously more organized and more atrocious as Crystal ends up sitting back and laughing. 

“If you’re supposed to be capturing the real behind the scenes feel, you might want to pull out your camera now. They’re like this all the time,” Christen advises as Tobin starts to giggle. 

(She does her best not to think how cute the sound is. She fails at not thinking that Tobin has one of the most stunning smiles she’s ever seen.)

Tobin follows Christen’s advice, snapping a few quick shots as the song winds down and Sammy devolves into laughter, her shaking body and long limbs making her dance moves look more like flailing. 

Kelley STILL isn’t wearing a shirt as she collapses in her own fit of giggles, so Christen takes it upon herself to encourage her to get dressed. She grabs Kelley’s shirt and tosses at her. It lands on her face, which only serves to make Christen laugh too. 

She’s aware of Tobin continuing to snap pictures, her initial awkwardness laid aside with her camera in hand and most of the locker room devolved into laughter. 

Christen’s breath catches in her throat when Tobin glances above her view finder, her eyes meeting hers, just for a second, and then she’s clicking the camera button again, eye back on the viewfinder, camera trained on Christen. Christen can feel the broad smile on her face and it makes her feel suddenly self-conscious, so she looks away, taming her smile some. She’s really not sure she can handle a whole week of Tobin being around, camera in hand, looking like  _ that _ . 

  
  
  


Usually at camps Christen has no trouble focusing. She loves soccer. She loves competition. (Her sisters might say a little too much, but look where it’s gotten her.) Today, though, she just can’t seem to get her head on straight. 

The drills they run aren’t unfamiliar, though the coaching staff always come up with one or two new things to work some skill. It’s nothing she shouldn’t be able to handle, though. Her muscles still feel tight despite her stretching. She trips over the hurdles, more than she’d like to admit, and when they break into a 10 v 2 drill her passes can’t connect for the life of her. 

She’s overly aware of Tobin on the sidelines or moving through the field as they do drills, and she knows that Tobin might well be documenting every single failure on film. 

When they stop for a water break, Allie is joking with Tobin, who’s throwing her head back and laughing in a way that shows off both the sharp cut of her jaw and the smooth skin of her throat, and Christen does her best not to stare. It’s not her fault that both are ridiculously attractive. 

It’s Kelley, of course it is, who throws her arm around Christen’s shoulders, following her gaze on to Tobin, and says, “Get your head in the game, Turtle.” 

It’s a nickname she hasn’t heard in years. Not since her first years at Stanford when she still couldn’t really head the ball very well. It’s enough to make Christen turn a rather harsh glare on Kelley. 

“I’m trying. Not everyone has a good day of practice every day.” 

Kelley smirks. “Not the game I meant, Pressy. Go on. Get over there. Go talk to her.” 

Christen’s eyes go wide as she realizes what Kelley is implying and she shakes her head, taking a few long, cooling gulps of water. “This is camp, Kelley. I need to focus.”

Kelley shrugs and walks away, and Christen almost thinks she heard her mutter “You need to get laid,” but maybe she’s just hearing things, so she lets it go. 

As Allie jogs back onto the field and away from Tobin shouting, “You better get some good shots, Harry!” and Tobin hollers back, “Try not to suck at soccer, Harry!”, Christen tries to convince herself that that isn’t jealousy curling in her gut at the fact that they already seem to have found nicknames for each other. 

She wants to bond with Tobin. She could use a new friend, especially since her current friends are driving her crazy. (Nothing more. Even friendships are hard enough to build with their job.) It’s just not the right time, though. 

  
  


When they head into 8 v 8, she’s sure everyone has noticed her poor performance. 

Dawn’s given her a bit of a pep talk, Julie’s pulled her aside to ask if she’s doing okay, and Alex keeps shooting her quizzical looks. Christen is 100% certain that she’s going to look absolutely ridiculous in every single picture Tobin’s taken of her. 

“Okay, now you need to get your head in this game,” Kelley pants as she jogs up to her after one of Christen’s passes to Carli goes way wide of where she wanted it. “Tobin’s here to do a job. That’s it. Teasing or no teasing. You’re here to do a job too. Focus on the ball. You know how to do this. We’ve been doing this forever.” 

Christen nods because they have and because it’s Kelley. Kelley who showed her the ropes at Stanford. Kelley who welcomed her in like a little sister. Kelley who she’s shed blood and sweat and tears with for over a decade. Kelley who she used to score goals alongside and who now supports her from the back (or the middle, or really anywhere on the field she’s needed). Despite the teasing and the arranging for Tobin to be their photographer this week for dubious reasons, Kelley is one of her best friends, and she has her best interest at heart. Kelley knows she loves the game and knows how to get her centered. 

“Take a breath, focus on the ball, focus on the plays. You got this, Chris.” Kelley pats her on the butt and jogs away to take the throw in. 

Christen closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. When she opens them again, she doesn’t glance towards the sidelines where Tobin is standing, camera in hand. She focuses on the ball in Kelley’s hands, moves in, and she’s exactly where she needs to be when Andi crosses it to her, one touch from her right enough to tap it into the back of the net, past Alyssa’s outstretched gloves. 

She hears cheering from the side and it takes her a second to realize it’s Tobin. She tries to think if Tobin has cheered for any of the other goals scored by other people today. She must have, right? Of course she has. 

Christen feels a blush creeping up her cheeks that she hopes Tobin can’t make out with the zoom lens. 

She gives Tobin a little wave, catching herself in the middle of it and realizing just how stupid she’s being. She bites her lip and turns away. “Head in the game,” she mutters to herself, jogging back to center field and focusing on the ball at Alex’s feet. 

Alex ends up getting her shot blocked by AD and Christen would swear she hears, “She’s our keeper!” called from the sidelines, but when she glances Tobin’s way, her face is glued to the camera and she’s snapping away, so maybe it was just her imagination. 

Except if it wasn’t that means that clearly Tobin is just cheering for everyone. 

Or at least the Portland players. That would make sense. She said she was a fan. 

(Except Christen isn’t a Portland player, and she’d definitely cheered for her.)

AD kicks the ball long and it’s heading towards Christen, but Julie is right there and sends it out. 

“Heads!” Kelley hollers as the ball heads straight for Tobin, and Christen holds her breath, waiting for the soccer ball to hit her or her camera or for someone or something to end up injured or damaged. 

Tobin quickly holds her camera to the side, chests the ball, which drops to her feet, and chips it up into Kelley’s hands with a grin.

Christen’s mouth hangs open and her eyes go wide. Those aren’t moves that just anyone has. Tobin has played soccer. Not professionally, or she’d know her, but she plays. That...that might change things. 

Slightly.

A little. 

“What??” Sonny breaks the silence that Christen hadn’t even realized had settled on the field, too overwhelmed by the noise in her own head. “Where did that come from?”

“I think you’ve been holding out on us, Tobito!” Kelley accuses, as Allie yells, “Hey, Harry, what the fuck?”

“Ladies, you are in the middle of a scrimmage!” Jill’s voice reminds them. 

Christen can see a faint blush on Tobin’s cheeks even as the team settles back into what they’re supposed to be doing, and she can’t help it if this time her eyes are a little slow to drag back to the ball and away from Tobin’s sheepish little smile. 

Fuck.

This might actually be a crush. 

  
  


“You’ve got some ‘splainin’ to do, young lady!” Kelley says, marching towards Tobin pointing an accusing finger as soon as the whistle blows and Jill releases them for some recovery time. 

“You play.” Christen can’t help the way that it’s more accusation than question as she heads over hot on Kelley’s heals. 

“I never said I didn’t,” Tobin replies with a little shrug as more of the team crowds around. 

“Harry, you are full of surprises.” 

“How long have you played?”

“Do you play around here?” 

“You should practice with us some time!” 

The comments are coming in so many directions that Christen can’t keep track of who is saying what, and she’s actually familiar with everyone’s voice. She can only imagine how overwhelming it is for Tobin, whose cheeks are flushing an attractive shade of pink. 

“Guys! Let her breathe!” Christen says, stepping closer to her and elbowing Kelley out of the way. She splays her hands out, forcing the others to take a bit of a step back, and looks at Tobin with a smile. “Sorry about them. They get a little overexcited sometimes.”

Tobin grins back at her. “I can tell.”

“This warrants excitement,” Kelley counters. “Tobin plays soccer!”

It’s the way Kelley is looking at Christen, like she’s trying to convey something deeper in those words, that makes Christen squirm uncomfortably. She thinks she gets it, too. It’s something they have in common. It’s groundwork. 

It’s irrelevant, she tells herself. 

Tobin doesn’t play professionally and the stresses of being pro are different than just playing recreationally. It’s not better or worse, it’s just different. It doesn’t mean that Tobin would innately understand her just because she can kick a ball. 

“Let’s see what you’ve got Tobito,” Kelley says, retrieving a ball and tossing it at Tobin, who fortunately has the quick reflexes to protect her camera. 

“Kelley!” Christen scolds. 

“Sorry,” Kelley mutters with the little nose scrunch that Christen is all too familiar with and means that Kelley acted without thinking. 

Christen rolls her eyes and turns her attention back Tobin, who’s putting her camera safely in it’s case. She turns back and kicks the ball up into her hands with a sheepish grin and a faint blush building on her cheeks, and Christen has to bite her lip to keep from blurting out that that might be the sexiest thing she’s ever seen. 

Tobin turns the thought into a lie a moment later when she says, “What would you like me to do exactly?” then drops the ball to her feet and juggles it easily while waiting for a response. 

It’s not like Christen can’t juggle. It’s not like she’s never seen other players juggle. Good players. Good jugglers. 

But there’s an ease to the way Tobin does it, like she’s not in a hurry at all about her movements like people so often are, like she knows the ball is going to fall where she wants it. She juggles the ball with the calmness of someone who spent hours as a kid in their backyard practicing and practicing until they could do it well. Someone with that much ball control would undoubtedly be able to translate it onto the field. 

Tobin kicks it up high and catches the ball between her shoulder blades, then looks up with a grin. Some stray strands of hair have fallen into her face and she blows them away as Sonny says, “Well, damn Tobin!” Tobin’s grin gets wider as Julie says, “All right, you’ve got some ball skills, girl!” and Allie says, “But do you know how to pass and shoot and score?” 

Tobin’s blush is a solid pink dusting her cheeks as she straightens, and turns so the ball drops to her feet. She looks around and makes eye contact with Christen. She tilts her head towards the field in an unspoken question and Christen nods, feeling inexplicably nervous. She moves back, giving Tobin enough room to pass her the ball, which she does with easy accuracy. 

Tobin jogs out then, towards the far post of the goal, and Christen takes one, two touches, then crosses it to her. It’s an easy tap in, and of course, nobody is actually in the goal, but it goes into the top left corner of the net in a way that makes Christen think that it would have probably gone in anyway. 

Sonny hops out onto the field, retrieving it from the back of the net, and kicking it back towards Tobin. “Let’s see how you do with someone actually trying to stop you,” she challenges. 

Tobin dribbles around a little bit, but Sonny is pretty effectively cutting her off at every turn. 

Christen moves in closer, and she’s not sure Tobin even sees her until Tobin, without actively looking at her, flicks the ball back directly to her. 

Christen has to resist the urge to stop and grin in amazement, and instead she dribbles, turning on the speed to get around Sonny. 

Except Kelley steps in with a wide grin. 

Christen fakes it left, then right, but Kelley reads her just as easily as she always could. She turns away to try to make some space for herself, but when she turns back, Kelley’s still there. She tries another fake, but she can already see Kelley’s read that one, too, and she sees Tobin has moved up in her peripheral vision. 

Sonny is, for now, too amused by her attempts to get around Kelley to have noticed, so when her foot pulls the ball back, she taps it just enough to get it back to Tobin’s feet. 

“Shit!” Sonny declares, racing to get into position to block Tobin again, but Tobin dribbles it once, twice, and then knocks it right through Sonny’s legs and races around her. 

Sonny is so impressed and surprised she freezes in place. Christen can’t stop the grin that spreads across her face at the knowledge that Tobin, sexy photographer, just nutmegged one of the best defenders on the USWNT. The rest of the team is frozen in apparent shock. 

Tobin doesn’t seem to process exactly what she’s done, too focused on the task at hand, as she strikes with her left and the ball sails into the net. 

It’s like the shock wears off on everyone at the same time. Half of the team is saying some variation of, “Oooooooh! Sonny got megged by the photographer!” The rest of them are hooting and laughing and smacking each other as if they still can’t quite believe it. 

Sonny is smacking her knee and laughing hard, and Christen -

Christen sees the triumphant grin on Tobin’s face. She sees Tobin raise her arms victoriously. 

She’s just so goddamn cute and together they just scored against Kelley and Sonny and, well, Christen feels like that warrants a proper goal celebration. 

She runs over and wraps Tobin in a hug, telling herself that it’s just for the goal, that she would (and has) done this for other teammates. She feels Tobin stiffen momentarily, and then Tobin’s arms are wrapped around her, strong and warm, and Tobin’s laughing into the crook of her neck, and it’s just a beautiful sound. 

Christen’s whole chest floods with warmth and a tightness coils in her stomach, and when Sonny and Kelley knock into them a moment later, joining in the hug, it feels like something clicking slightly into place. 

Christen’s cheeks hurt from grinning so wide when the pile on of hugs has stopped enough that she can finally step back, and Tobin is standing there, smiling broadly at her. 

(And it’s probably not really just at her, but it FEELS like it is, and that makes a different kind of warmth than the one in her chest settle somewhere lower.) 

Tobin’s still close and Christen can see the almost amber flecks in her brown eyes and the slight sheen of sweat glistening on her tanned skin, and Christen has to force herself to look away before she does something stupid like hug her again with absolutely no excuse. 

“Nice nutmeg, Tobito!” Kelley declares and holds up her hand for a high five, which Tobin gives her. 

“Thanks, I’m kinda known - I mean - No. Nevermind,” Tobin mumbles, looking at the grass as her cheeks flush an attractive shade of pink. 

“Oh, no, no. No nevermind. Uh-uh. Now we HAVE to know,” Kelley counters. 

“No, it’s stupid. It’s just a nickname my friends have for me,” Tobin replies, still not making eye contact. 

“Well, now we REALLY have to know,” Sonny says. 

Christen wants to tell them to back off, but, at the same time, her curiosity is piqued. 

Tobin glances at her and Christen smiles what she hopes is an encouraging smile, but Tobin looks away again quickly. “They call me the nutmegqueen.” 

The nickname itself is mumbled and said so quickly that Christen isn’t quite sure she heard it properly. Apparently she’s not the only one because Alex says, “The what?”

Tobin sighs, and then, with a vaguely pained expression on her face says, “The Nutmeg Queen.” 

“Dang, Sonny, you got megged by royalty,” Lindsey teases, patting Sonny on the back. 

Sonny sticks her tongue out at Lindsey and Tobin groans. 

“I said it was stupid.”

“It’s not stupid. It’s amazing,” Kelley counters. “These are soccer-playing friends?” 

Tobin nods. “We’ve played club soccer together since we were in high school.”

“What club because apparently we should be scouting it for talent!” Kelley says. 

Tobin laughs, then, but the blush on her cheeks turns an even darker shade of pink. “It’s just a local one now. Not as competitive as the high school one. It’s like an adult rec league. Just a few of us at the park. It doesn’t matter if you can’t make it because the babysitter got sick or whatever. Nothing too serious.” 

“Babysitter? You have kids, Harry?” Allie asks, voicing Christen’s sudden, panicked thought. 

Tobin vehemently shakes her head. “No. God no. Not that I never want to, I should just probably at least have a girlfriend first or something.” She chuckles nervously and Christen feels her own cheeks flush a little as Kelley shoots her a pointed look. 

A completely unnecessary pointed look. Christen is painfully aware of the fact that Tobin just admitted to being single. She’s also aware that Tobin didn’t look at her, or anyone when she said it. She didn’t try to see if anyone was interested in that information. She was just feeling overwhelmed because everyone was crowded around her again and so she was blurting information. It was adorable, but it didn’t mean that Christen should go around letting herself have this crush on her.

“Well, Tobin who plays for a rec club she won’t divulge the name of. Tomorrow, bring your cleats with your camera. You’re gonna REALLY get in on the action,” Kelley informs her. 

“Oh, I mean, I don’t think-”

“I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but you just megged and scored against a US Women’s National Team defender,” Becky cuts her off. 

Tobin closes one eye and squints the other, her face scrunching up adorably as she looks first to the sky, and then at Becky. “I did that, huh?”

Becky nods. Christen nods, too. 

Tobin laughs again. (It’s a sound Christen could really get used to. Not that she should. She shouldn’t. Definitely not.) 

“You should bring your cleats,” Christen says, not entirely sure why she’s encouraging this. It’s not a distraction that Jill is apt to be cool with. Hell, it’s not a distraction that SHE needs. 

Tobin’s eyes flick to her though, and she raises an eyebrow at her and bites her lower lip before asking, “Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Christen confirms as she swats Kelley away as discreetly as possible. 

Tobin bites her lip again then shrugs. “I’ll think about it. But now, I believe you’re all paying me to do a job that I am definitely not doing.”

“I mean, we’re pretty much done. Unless you’d like to photograph us in the shower…” Kelley invites, batting her eyes at Tobin. She gives Christen a devilish grin. 

“Pretty sure I’ve done the whole all of you naked thing,” Tobin retorts, and Christen can’t help being a little impressed that Tobin was able to take that particular bit of teasing in stride. 

(There’s also a little voice in the back of Christen’s head that points out that Tobin didn’t sound remotely interested in seeing any of them naked again and that includes her.)

“Oh, but weren’t we gonna do that team dinner thing?” Ash asks, and Christen’s brows furrow because this is definitely the first she’s hearing of it. 

“Oh yeah! We had talked about that!” Ali replies. “Remember Al?” 

Christen doesn’t miss the elbow to the side that Alex gets when she says, “Hmm?” but Tobin apparently does. 

“Oh, yeah, team dinner. Right! Remember, Kel?”

“Yep! Team dinner tonight. Tobin, as team photographer for the week, you should definitely be there. Nothing too fancy. I’ll text you the deets.” 

Tobin looks mildly suspicious as she looks from one person to another, but then she shrugs and says, “Okay. Food’s on you though.” 

  
  


It’s only once Tobin is left packing up her gear and Christen and Kelley are heading to the showers that Christen says, “Team dinner?” voicing her own suspicions. 

Kelley grins. “It’s team building.”

“And not planned by Jill,” Christen accuses. 

Kelley shrugs. “Oh no, Ash invented a dinner to get you to spend more time with the hot photographer who is 100% your type. How horrible.”

Christen narrows her eyes at Kelley, having half a mind to steal her clothes while she’s in the shower. Knowing Kelley, she probably wouldn’t be phased and would simply wander out naked until she scrounged up enough clothes from someone else. “She’s not my type.” 

Kelley just gives her a look in reply. It’s all she needs. Kelley has known her longer than anyone else on the team. Kelley has always been able to read her like a book. 

“Not 100%.”

Kelley doesn’t address it. Instead she says, “You’d better sit next to her at dinner.” 

Christen suspects she won’t be given a choice about it. 

(Christen doesn’t mind that idea at all.)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin goes to the team dinner and is really good at putting her foot in her mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy the chapter! It's a bit shorter than the last few, but it felt like a good stopping place and I wanted to give people a bit of brightness after the games yesterday. My poor Thorns. *sobs*

“Wait, you nutmegged an actual current member of the US Women’s National Team?” Amy demands, her jaw hanging open. 

Lauren and Amy had both decided they needed to come over again by they time they’d left Tobin’s the night before. Luke and Jrue let out battle cries as they chased Ryan around Tobin’s couch, which only makes Tobin laugh even as Lauren chides them to be a little quieter. 

Amy refills her glass of wine and looks expectantly at Tobin. 

Tobin can’t stop the grin that spreads across her face. “Yeah. I did. I did that.” 

The memory of the nutmeg was pretty sweet. Everyone’s reactions of shock followed by immediately teasing Sonny had been hilarious. The goal she’d scored right after had felt amazing. It had made her want to go outside when she got home and kick a ball around for a while, work on skills she’d long ago stopped bothering to perfect. 

The hug, though. The hug was what made her skin flush with warmth and her chest feel tight in an almost enticing way. Christen’s arms wrapped firmly around her, the clean floral scent of her shampoo mixing with the sweat from practice into something that Tobin would now forever think of as distinctly Christen. 

A shiver runs down Tobin’s back and she shakes it off, hoping her friends don’t notice. It’s bad enough that she’s sure that when she sorts through her photos later a disproportionate amount of them are going to be of Christen. She was supposed to be photographing everyone, but her eyes kept being drawn to Christen Press. 

The way she moved on the field was incredible, somehow dainty at times and then turning it on so full of power and speed and precision. Tobin had had to remind herself to pick her jaw up off the floor when Christen had curled a ball into the back of the net in the most gorgeous goal Tobin had ever seen. No wonder she was one of the elite. 

And now Tobin was expected to choose an outfit and go out to dinner with her. Well, not just her, obviously, but the team. What was she supposed to wear? How was she supposed to behave? Was she supposed to take pictures throughout dinner or should she leave the camera at home? Would it be weird if she showed up without it? 

“Earth to Tobin!” Lauren waves a hand in front of her. 

“Hmm?” Tobin asks, feeling her cheeks flush as she realizes she has absolutely no idea what her friends have said to her for the past few minutes. She doesn’t miss the look they exchange now, though. “What?”

Amy turns a smirk on her. “Where’d you go just now, Toby?” 

Tobin glares at the use of her least favorite nickname. “Nowhere,” she lies. 

Her friends’ expressions tell her that they’re not buying that for a second. 

“Just thinking about photos. And soccer.” That wasn’t a COMPLETE lie.

Amy looks like she’s about to argue, but Luke chooses that exact moment to run straight into the end of Tobin’s coffee table, and the ensuing tears give Tobin a brief respite from inquiring eyes as Luke is given a snuggle and a bandaid despite the lack of blood and all of the children are reprimanded to not be so wild in Auntie Tobin’s apartment. 

Tobin kicks them a ball a moment later, earning her a headshake from Lauren and a heavy sigh from Amy. 

“Do you know how many conversations I have with them about not kicking balls in the house?” Amy demands. 

Tobin shrugs and grins. “Hey guys? Just at Auntie Toto’s house, okay?”

The three children nod and begin passing the ball to each other. The next generation of superstars, Tobin can’t help but think. 

“You KNOW they’re not going to understand that.”

“I kick balls in here. They should be allowed to.”

“If they break some of your equipment that’s on you, Heath,” Amy warns, but Tobin waves away the threat. 

“They’ll be fine.” 

“So back to nutmegging a USWNT defender…” Lauren segues. 

“Sonny,” Tobin supplies. 

“Ooooh. Sonny. Getting all personal with the players now. Wait was she one of the ones that we thought was cute and gay and single?”

“Doesn’t matter. It wasn’t Christen ‘heart eyes’ Press,” Amy replies with a wave. 

“She gave me the assist. Kind of,” Tobin informs them, and immediately regrets it with the way their faces light up. 

“Oh she did, did she?” Lauren asks as Tobin attempts to point out that she definitely did not have heart eyes in the pictures she took and also for sure didn’t today. 

“No heart eyes, just an assist to your goal against a full on member of the USWNT! You! Our little nutmeg queen!” Lauren replies. 

“Oh my God, what if they recruit you! What if you end up playing with them?”

Tobin rolls her eyes. “They won’t. Guys, they’re like whole other level good.”

“Yeah, but you scored,” Amy points out. 

Tobin shakes her head. She had, it was true, but she’d also seen them play today. Their workout may have only been two hours long, but it was intense. Their physicality was above and beyond anything she’d ever dreamed of playing at. She’d gotten lucky today. Maybe she had some skills too, but luck had definitely played a part. That and Christen’s uncanny ability to land the ball exactly where she wanted it. “Come on, you’ve seen their games. I’m not that good.” 

Amy and Lauren exchange another look, but Tobin can’t decipher it. 

“What?”

Amy shakes her head. “Nothing.”

Tobin narrows her eyes at her, and turns to Lauren. 

“You sometimes, maybe -”

Tobin catches Amy shaking her head out of the corner of her eye and sticks her hand up to block Lauren’s line of sight of her. 

“You kind of have a tendency to underestimate yourself.”

It’s Tobin’s turn to shake her head again. “No, you guys don’t understand-”

“Hey, do you want us to help you pick out an outfit for tonight?” Amy cuts her off. 

Tobin wants to keep arguing. She wants to make her friends understand just how good the team really is. The precision, the training, the fitness, everything. She also, however, probably needs the help, so for now she lets it drop. “White t-shirt and jeans?” she suggests. 

Lauren rolls her eyes. “Tobs I love you but you cannot wear a white t-shirt to EVERYTHING.”

Tobin sighs. “Yeah. Fine. Help please.”

Tobin tugs anxiously at the black top that Lauren and Amy had insisted she wear. It’s technically still a t-shirt, but it’s a deep v-neck and the fabric has a silky quality to it that makes it a little fancier and a little more revealing than Tobin’s usually comfortable wearing. Her idea of jeans had been vetoed in favor of grey slacks that hugged her hips. Her hair had been blown dry, brushed, and left down despite her protests that it would get in her food, and the cubic zirconium stud earrings that Ryan had given her last Christmas adorn her ears. It was a good look, but it was not her most comfortable look. 

She peers through the window of the restaurant, wondering if the team is already here. She has her camera tucked under her arm, her zoom lens left at home in favor of a shorter one better for the more intimate setting. She’s not sure if she’s actually going to use it that much, but she’d have felt silly showing up without it as the team photographer. Besides, she felt a little naked without her camera on her. It’s a good ice breaker. It’s kind of something she can hide behind when she’s feeling self-conscious. 

Her heart rate speeds up as she pushes through the door and the bell above it chimes. A smiling teenage girl greets her with an expectant face and Tobin mumbles, “I’m supposed to be meeting a group,” her hand coming up to anxiously run through her hair. 

The girl’s eyes go wide, and she nods in recognition. “The team? They’re amazing! Do you think they’d sign something for me if I asked? I didn’t want to because, well, I mean, I didn’t want to seem unprofessional, but -”

“They’re pretty cool. They probably won’t mind,” Tobin says, not really sure if that’s true or not. It has to be weird just trying to get some dinner and having people come and ask for your autograph. Kind of invasive too, maybe. She’s already regretting her answer by the time the girl shows her into the back “party” room where the team is already seated around several tables that have been pushed together. 

Her eyes scan for an empty place, but before she can locate it, Allie spots her. 

“Harry! You made it!” she declares. 

And then the eyes of the whole team are on her. 

“Wow, Tobin, you look good,” Kelley says as she stands and pulls Tobin into a hug. 

Tobin blushes and tries not to cringe too much as the camera digs into her ribs a little. 

Allie hugs her next, murmuring, “The hair down look is nice on you.” 

“We saved you a seat over here!” Alex calls, and when she looks towards her voice, she sees just exactly who the empty seat is beside, and her breath catches in her throat. 

Christen has on a green blouse that makes her eyes pop and her hair is down and curly and she has large hoop earrings in and a bright, welcoming smile on her face, and somehow the entire look is overwhelmingly classy and incredibly sexy. “Hey,” Christen greets her in a quiet voice, her smile growing shy, which makes Tobin realize that she’s been staring. 

“Hi,” she replies, forcing her gaze away, and looking at Alex who will apparently be sitting on her other side. “Hi,” she repeats, feeling her cheeks flush. 

Alex grins. “Hi back.” Maybe it’s her imagination, but Tobin thinks it looks more like she’s amused than simply happy to see her. 

“Have a seat. We’ve already ordered drinks,” Kelley informs her, patting her on the back and giving her a little shove towards the empty seat. 

Tobin’s elbow brushes against Christen as she takes her seat and a tingly warmth floods through her that she does her absolute best to ignore. No matter what her friends might think, she knows she doesn’t stand a chance with someone like Christen. Besides, the smiles she gives are that bright for everyone. She’s just a kind, generous person. Kind, generous, sweet, and gorgeous. 

The low light of the restaurant makes her pale green eyes sparkle in a way that makes it hard for Tobin to focus when she looks at her, and she realizes that Christen has actually said something to her only after her eyes fall to her oh-so-inviting lips as she says, “Tobin?” 

“Sorry, what?” 

Christen smiles again and Tobin can feel a blush creeping up her neck. How big of a fool is she going to make of herself tonight? 

“I just said I was surprised you brought your camera. You’re allowed to just hang out with us and eat. I think Ash and Kel just wanted you to get more of a feel for the team. The more at ease you are, the better your pictures, or something.” 

There’s a look that passes between Christen and Alex over Tobin’s shoulder, but it’s so quick that Tobin can’t place it. 

“Yeah. We just wanted to spend more time with our new bestie,” Alex declares, slinging an arm around Tobin’s shoulder. 

She knows, obviously, that Alex is joking. She doesn’t mean it. Not really. It’s hard, though, especially after the way they’d crowded around earlier when they’d realized that she plays soccer, not to think of them as new friends rather than just employees. They’re warm and welcoming and, it’s a little weird and probably kind of stupid, but she feels like she fits with them. 

_ They’re only here for a few weeks. Once you’re done doing the jobs for them, they’ll be out of your life, _ she reminds herself as she picks up the menu in front of her and begins to scan through it. 

“Oh, I should probably warn you the hostess is gonna ask for an autograph,” she murmurs, looking up, feeling like she’s barely registered anything on the menu because Christen is right there next to her and Tobin can feel the warmth radiating off of her and it is more than a little distracting. 

“Me specifically or everyone?” Alex asks. 

Tobin shrugs. “Everyone I think. She’s a fan.”

“Awww, like you?” Sonny cuts in from across the table. 

Tobin narrows her eyes then smirks. “Nah. I’m just a fan of Christen and the Thorns that aren’t named Sonnett.” 

“Heeeeey!” Sonny pouts. 

“Oh, so nobody who’s not a Thorn made the list except Chris, huh?” Kelley cuts in. “Interesting. Don’t you think that’s interesting, Christen?” 

Tobin realizes her stupidity too late. “And Alex. I mean, who isn’t a fan of Alex Morgan?”

“Awww,” Alex says and wraps her arm around Tobin. “I’ve got a fan.” 

Tobin swears she can feel Christen’s eyes on her, but she doesn’t want to look to confirm. She doesn’t want to feel any more embarrassed than she already does. Instead she tugs herself away from Alex and does her best to focus on the menu once more. 

It’s like her eyes are reading the words, but none of the information is actually making it to her brain, though, and when the waitress comes to ask for her drink order, she still hasn’t so much as thought about what she’d like and she hasn’t progressed past the appetizers section of the menu. 

“Um, I’ll just have whatever you have on tap.” 

The waitress rattles off a list of selections and Tobin says the first one because it’s the only one her brain is able to retain more than because it’s what she actually wants. 

“Coming right up,” the waitress replies with a smile, and then there’s a glance with awe visible on her face at the rest of the table before she disappears, professional demeanor back in place. 

“I think she might ask for your autograph, too,” Tobin advises them. 

“You haven’t though,” Christen points out. 

“Thought it might be a bit unprofessional to ask you for one while you were naked and I was taking your pictures,” Tobin points out. 

Christen chokes on her sip of water, spitting out a little as she coughs, reaching for her napkin and covering her face as she coughs into it. Tobin pats her back in concern, doing her best to ignore the way warmth floods up her arm just at these small touches, focusing instead on the way that Christen’s face, or what’s visible of it behind the napkin, has turned bright red. 

She shouldn’t have mentioned the nudity. Or she should have timed it better. A gorgeous pro soccer player is choking to death on her drink and it’s all her fault. 

“Are you okay?” Tobin asks. 

“Chris, you good over there?” Kelley chimes in, and Tobin is mildly surprised to find that she sounds genuinely concerned rather than teasing. 

“I’m fine,” Christen croaks unconvincingly, but her coughing slows, and Tobin stops her patting in favor of rubbing soothing circles on her back as her breathing returns to normal. 

Christen lowers the napkin, a sheepish expression on her face, and Tobin realizes that she’s probably been touching her for way longer than necessary. Just in case Christen doesn’t blame her for making her choke, she’s definitely going to think she’s weird and maybe overly touchy-feely. 

Tobin pulls her hand back quickly and manages to bang her elbow on her chair. 

“Fuck!” she gasps as she clutches her arm, and then it’s Christen’s turn to reach out and ask, “Are you okay?” 

Christen’s hand is warm on her forearm, but the touch is delicate, as if she’s worried she might inflict more pain if she touches too firmly. 

Tobin’s grimace belies her nod. “Just hit my funny bone,” she manages through gritted teeth. 

Christen inhales sharply in sympathy. “Ouch.”

“That really hurts,” Alex murmurs from her other side. 

“Maybe you should kiss it and make it better, Chris,” Sonny suggests. There’s a soft thump and then Sonny says, “Ow!” and Tobin glances up in time to catch Lindsey looking far too innocent. 

She can feel her face flushing with heat and knows that another blush is undoubtedly making its way up her cheeks, but she hopes that the soft light of the restaurant will hide it some. 

“I’m fine,” Tobin tries to downplay it, shaking her arm as if that will make the intense pain shooting up from her elbow suddenly subside. “Really.”

The waitress, of course, chooses this moment to walk back over. “Is everyone ready to order?” 

Tobin has still barely looked at the menu, but there are a lot of them to order and everyone is probably hungry. Before she can say something to the effect of, “I’ll know by the time you reach me if you come to me last,” Ash is saying, “I think we need a few more minutes. Thanks.”

Tobin looks at the menu with renewed determination, but Christen’s arm is hovering near hers on the table and it’s just so damn distracting. 

It’s just an arm. 

It should not be having this effect on her. 

She didn’t want to label this thing, whatever it is, a crush, but if just Christen’s arm on the table  _ near _ her is doing  _ this _ to her, she might have to rethink it. She feels absolutely ridiculous when five minutes later the waitress comes back and she is no closer to deciding what she wants to eat. 

She opts for a burger in the end, just because it requires the least amount of thought. People settle in to easy conversation around her and she finds herself finally relaxing slightly as Kelley ribs Alex about something from the last Utah vs. Orlando game. Christen joins in, calling out Ali for a foul she swears up and down she did not commit, and Ash comes to her defense, but then Christen is saying, “At least she didn’t try to rip my jersey off,” and looks pointedly at Allie. 

“Couldn’t help it,” Allie replies with a grin and a shrug that has Tobin laughing. 

“I know she’s hot, Harry, but you had to try to undress her on the field?” 

The words are out before she’s properly thought through them, and as soon as she realizes exactly what she’s said she feels her cheeks start to burn and her heart start to race. 

“I meant that she’s so fast, she would’ve gotten away and scored if I hadn’t grabbed her jersey and fouled her, but good to know you think she’s hot,” Allie shoots back, her grin growing wider, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“I mean, you’re all hot,” Tobin mumbles, feeling her blush deepen and wishing there was a way for her to melt into her seat so that she could escape this complete embarrassment. “Like, objectively. You’re all in great shape and you’re all -”

“It’s cool. We all know Christen’s hot,” Kelley cuts her off. “Good to know you have functional eyes.” 

Tobin takes a deep breath and manages a small smile at Kelley. She’s more than a little surprised that Kelley bailed her out, but she’ll take it. She makes sure she doesn’t look at Christen, though. She can’t risk her blush getting even worse. She can’t risk her eyes giving away just how hot she actually thinks Christen is. Instead she fiddles with her napkin and unrolls her silverware, placing her napkin in her lap and her silverware next to her place. 

“Here’s your beer. Sorry about the wait,” the waitress rescues her a moment later. 

If she’s honest, she’d just about forgotten that she’d even ordered one, what with all of her putting her foot in her mouth, but she takes it and thanks the server. A drink is just what she needs to hide behind, and maybe the alcohol will make her loosen up just a little. 

“So are you going to insist on keeping your soccer team a secret?” Kelley demands once the waitress has left with a promise that their food will be out in not too long. 

“Mhm,” Tobin replies. The last thing she needs is the USWNT googling her team and showing up at her games or something. She’d be mortified. She wouldn’t be able to play. She would very possibly melt into the field. 

It’s one thing to play around with them at their practice. It’s something else entirely to have them come see her really try in an actual game. Plus, she can just imagine Lauren and Amy’s reactions. Everyone on the team, actually. Casey, Yael...All of them. They’re all fans. An actual game would just devolve into 20 questions for the national team and embarrassing stories about Tobin. No, Tobin definitely needs to keep this team far far away from her team and from the New Kids. 

“So you’ve never heard of a team called…” Kelley looks at Sonny, who happily supplies, “Wizards on the Mountain.”

Tobin feels her mouth go dry and she takes a large gulp of beer and almost chokes on it as a result. “Sorry, who?” she asks, feigning ignorance as she covers a cough. 

Kelley grins. “Wizards on the Mountain. They’re a women’s league team in the area. I’m surprised you haven’t heard of them.”

Tobin smiles meekly at Kelley. “Weird,” she says. 

“Yeah. Very. Especially since this kinda hot player rainbowing the opposite team’s defender in the middle of the game looks SO much like you.”

The sinking feeling in the pit of Tobin’s stomach grows as Kelley pulls up a video on her phone. She cringes, but the video isn’t THAT good quality. It could probably be anyone with brown hair. It’s not like they know her number is 17. 

“Strange.” 

Kelley looks like the cat that ate the canary as the video continues and Tobin hears her sister’s voice yell, “YEAH TOBIN!” as she dribbles around another defender and shoots on goal. 

Tobin closes her eyes and sighs. 

“She’s even got your name. You should maybe look into that,” Kelley advises. 

“How did you-?”

“Sonny and Lindsey did some recon,” Kelley replies with a smirk. 

Sonny shrugs. “We play here. We know people. We hear things. We’ve been to some of your league’s games actually, though I don’t think we’ve seen you play.”

Tobin groans and covers her face with her hands. 

“You’ve got skills, Tobito! Why the embarrassment?” Kelley asks. 

“Seriously. That video of you nutmegging two players in a row that one game! That was sweet!” Sonny chimes in. 

“Oh, and remember the one where she was just juggling before the game, then to stop she kicked it into the back of the net from practically midfield?” Lindsey adds. 

“I personally liked the rainbow compilation video,” Ash puts in her two cents. 

“Do you ever nutmeg the keepers?” Alyssa asks. 

“Wait, have ALL of you seen these videos?” Christen demands. 

There’s something in her tone of voice that makes Tobin finally look at her. Tobin would have thought that Kelley would have shown her the videos already, but by the expression on her face it’s clear that that’s not the case. 

There are some sheepish nods around the table. 

“I was pretty impressed, actually,” Carli says from the far end of the table, and Tobin’s mouth hangs open in surprise. 

Carli is complimenting her playing? Carli had bothered to watch the videos in the first place? She’d given off such a professional vibe at the photo shoot and had barely hung out longer than necessary. 

“Um, thanks,” Tobin hears herself mumble. 

“I think we should make her try one of our practices,” Pinoe chimes in with a cheeky grin. 

“YES!” Kelley declares as Tobin vehemently shakes her head. 

“Your coach would never go for that,” Tobin attempts.

“We can be very persuasive,” Julie counters. 

“I don’t want to waste your time. You guys are training. Besides, you hired me to take pictures.” Tobin holds up her camera for emphasis. 

“She has a point,” Carli says, and Tobin feels the slightest hint of relief. 

“You could see how many of us you could meg in one practice,” Kelley says, eyes bright. 

“She wouldn’t get me,” Mal says. 

“Or me,” Tierna agrees. 

“Pressy’s too fast. No way she’d get megged,” Alex says. 

“I’d have to see it in person to believe you could get me,” Crystal teases with a grin. 

“At least we all know she can meg Sonny,” Kelley points out. 

Sonny pouts and Kelley laughs and Tobin feels herself relax into the idea ever-so-slightly. It could be fun. It could be an interesting challenge. She wouldn’t necessarily have to do the whole practice with them. She could just hang out a bit before and a bit after and then photograph during. 

“Bet I could meg you all in two days,” Tobin retorts. It’s a bold claim and she regrets it the moment is leaves her mouth, except then she looks at Christen and there’s a gleam in her eye as she smirks at her. 

“All of us, huh?” 

Tobin swallows hard. How is it possible that Christen’s voice sounds so incredibly sexy. It’s unfair. It’s  _ doing _ things to her. She nods. 

“You seem pretty confident about that.”

Tobin’s sure it’s an unconscious thing, but Christen is leaning in a little closer and Tobin can smell the sweet, clean scent of her shampoo and something else that is just Christen and it’s more than a little distracting. She forces a smirk onto her face and leans in a little herself. “I mean, I know my strengths.”

“Is flirting one of them?” Kelley’s voice cuts into the moment and Tobin leans back, feeling herself starting to blush yet again. 

“What?” she asks. They weren’t flirting. It hadn’t been-

Christen obviously isn’t interested in her like that. 

“Nothing,” Kelley says with a smirk. 

That seems much more like the Kelley that Tobin is getting to know. She narrows her eyes at her and tries to think up something witty to say, but the waitress shows up with some of the food and the conversation gets derailed. 

Tobin makes a mental note to not get sucked in like that again. No matter HOW gorgeous Christen is. No matter how much her eyes sparkle in the low restaurant light. No matter how sexy her voice sounds. 

No matter how fast Tobin is falling for her. 

This is not good. Not good at all. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin begins her nutmeg challenge and Christen begins her trying not to fall for Tobin challenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone had a good Halloween! Have a late Halloween present. As always leave me a comment if you like how this is going!

“Think your girl can do it?” Alex asks, tapping Christen on the shoulder to get her attention. 

Christen rolls her eyes. Her teammates seem insistent on not getting the idea that there’s nothing to her relationship with Tobin besides maybe a budding friendship. 

“She’s not my girl,” Christen says anyway. Maybe with enough repetition her teammates will actually start to believe her. 

(Maybe with enough repetition she’ll start to believe she doesn’t want what they’re all suggesting to be true.)

Dinner had been fun. Really fun. 

And also, at moments, a little intense. It was like she had been able to feel Tobin next to her from the second she sat down at the table beside her, as if she had a warmth and an energy just radiating off of her. 

It had been more than a little distracting. Tobin had set Christen’s heart racing on more than one occasion both with her words and innocent touches - ones that Christen knew Tobin meant nothing by and probably barely noticed, like when she’d patted her on the back when she’d choked. The touch had burned into her back and made it harder for her to stop coughing, and yet she’d never wanted it to stop and had actually been disappointed when Tobin had pulled her hand away. 

There had been moments when Christen had almost been able to convince herself that there was the hint of a spark between them, but then Allie would say something to Tobin, calling her “Harry”, or Tobin would turn to Alex and start a conversation, or Sonny or Kelley would tell a joke or tease her and she’d laugh. 

God she has an amazing laugh, Christen can’t help but think. It’s the type of laugh where her whole face lights up and her body shakes as her mouth opens into a wide smile, half giggle and half full-on laughter. Everytime she had laughed last night Christen had found herself smiling along whether she’d caught the joke or not. 

God, this is getting out of control. 

She needs to get a handle on this crush, like, yesterday. 

“Sure, not your girl. Just the girl who sent heated glances your way all through dinner,” Kelley says. 

Christen rolls her eyes again. If that were true, Christen would have noticed. She’d definitely stolen more than her fair share of glances in Tobin’s direction. 

“How does it feel being so delusional, Kel? Is it nice in O’Haraland?” 

“It’s lovely,” Kelley replies with a grin. “The girls are hot and flirt adorkably and soccer and surfing are life.” 

Christen chuckles despite herself. “You do you, Kel.” 

“Always,” Kelley says. 

“You never answered Alex’s question, though,” Becky points out from across the aisle. 

Christen narrows her eyes at her. Seriously, where is the support from her teammates? She shakes her head and sighs. “I don’t know. She megged Sonny pretty easily.” She says it extra loud and is rewarded with indignant “Hey!” from Sonny a few rows back. 

“Not wrong!” Crystal shouts from the back. 

“She got lucky!” Sonny calls back. 

“Looked like skill to me,” Christen counters, happy for the shift in teasing and attention. 

“That’s funny ‘cause if we’re going by appearances, it looked an awful lot like you were flirting with her last night,” Sonny shoots back.

“What?” Christen had not been flirting. She hadn’t. “No!”

“No, of course you weren’t flirting,” Kelley says, but Christen knows better than to think she’s not about to follow that up with something that completely contradicts her first statement, so she bites back the “Exactly. Thank you.” on the tip of her tongue. 

“You just leaned in every time she said anything.”

Christen rolls her eyes. That was obviously just so she could hear her better. 

“And touched her arm every available opportunity,” Lindsey adds. 

“I did not!” Christen argues indignantly. She can feel herself getting riled up and she knows that that’s what her teammates want to some degree, but she can’t help it.  _ Deep breaths, _ she tells herself. 

“Oh Tobin,” Christen hears Alex say behind her, and when she turns to look through the seats, she sees the way Alex has her hand on Allie’s arm. “You’re SO funny.”

“I never said that,” Christen points out. 

“Wow, Tobin, that sounds really interesting,” Allie says, reaching out a hand to touch Alex’s arm. 

“You surf? That’s amazing. Kelley does too,” Becky joins in, reaching across the aisle to put a hand on Christen’s arm. 

She hadn’t really done it that much, had she? Sure, maybe a few times, but it wasn’t like every time they spoke, right? 

“You’re all exaggerating,” she grumbles. “And you all suck.” 

She turns to Kelley, who’s always been able to read her best, and her doubt must still be written on her face because Kelley just nods with a sympathetic smile and pats her arm. 

Christen groans and thumps her head back against the headrest, closing her eyes and trying not to see Tobin’s broad smile or her brown eyes on the inside of her eyelids. 

“I hope you all get ‘megged!”

  
  


It’s really unfair how good Tobin looks in a pair of light blue soccer shorts with the number 17 printed on one leg and a white T-shirt. She’s all tanned, glowing skin, muscular legs, strong arms, and broad smiles as she pulls on her cleats. She wears her socks low, barely covering her shin guards, putting her calves attractively on display. 

It’s really, really not fair. 

In case the cleats weren’t enough of an indication, Tobin shows that she has every intention of following up on her threat by picking up her camera in one hand, snapping a few pics of the team stretching, then making her way over to a group of balls and kicking one up, juggling it for a few steps, then kicking it right through an unsuspecting Lindsey’s legs. 

Christen has to laugh as Tobin bites her lower lip, trying to hold back a grin, but her happy little wiggle as she jogs after the ball gives away just how pleased with herself she is.

It’s adorable.

Tobin is adorable.

Tobin is going to be a problem. 

  
  


Tobin somehow manages to continue to take pictures as she meanders through the team through warm ups, joining in at times once she’s checked with Jill and Dawn that it’s okay. Tobin gets Tierna, Andi, and Moe in the same sneaky, unassuming way she got Lindsey in short order. It’s not until she goes for Kelley that she gets blocked, Kelley giving a triumphant, “Ha!” as Tobin laughs and chases down the ball that Kelley had kicked away. 

Christen can’t help making eye contact with Tobin as she reclaims the ball and turns back towards them. Tobin raises an eyebrow at her and starts to dribble towards her and Christen just laughs. 

“No,” she warns. “No way.”

“Give me time,” Tobin replies, dribbling ever closer. 

The words hit Christen square in the chest. Tobin just means to nutmeg her, but it almost feels like a call from the universe for something else. Of course time is a luxury she doesn’t have. When she’s done in Portland it’s back to her club in Salt Lake City, traveling for games. Then the next camp for the national team, wherever that one is. Then photoshoots for sponsors and meetings with potential new ones, zig zagging across the country. She’s not likely to be back in Portland until the Royals play the Thorns there in a month and a half. Tobin, meanwhile, will be in Portland the whole time, far away, living her own life that Christen still knows barely anything about. 

Tobin’s almost at her before she realizes, the grin on her face wide, her feet faking left then right. She uses quick touches with both sides of her feet and Christen can understand how defenders in her club league might have a hard time keeping up. Christen is expecting it, though, so she simply puts her feet close together and grins her challenge back at Tobin, who laughs a light, melodic laugh that Christen feels reverberate through her body, as she dribbles around her. 

Tobin passes close enough that her elbow brushes against Christen’s arm, and Christen fights the shiver that threatens to run down her spine at the touch. Christen’s still stuck in a world of sensations when a moment later she hears AD groan. 

“For real?” AD says. 

When Christen looks over her shoulder she sees Tobin grin and shrug. 

“Everyone includes the keepers.”

AD groans again and looks mildly embarrassed. 

“You know the more of us you get, the harder it’ll be,” Ash points out. “We’re already on higher alert than we were at the start.” 

“All right, ladies!” Jill gets their attention. “We’re going to do some 2 v 2. Tobin -”

“Yeah, got it. Moving to the sidelines!” Tobin says, heading off the field before she’s even done talking. 

“No. I was going to say, if you’d like, you can join in to make the numbers even instead of some of the coaching staff.” 

Christen’s eyebrows shoot up and she secretly wonders which of her teammates bribed Jill because this does NOT sound like her. Her eyes fall on Rose, Sonny, and Mal who are standing around looking far too innocent, but maybe it’s just her imagination. 

Tobin freezes and looks equally as surprised as Christen feels. 

“You can play forward or midfield?” Jill asks. 

Tobin nods, her eyebrows still knitted in confusion, a bewildered look in her eyes. 

“Okay, great. Why don’t you be....Christen’s partner. Grab a green pinny. Also in green I want Julie, Kelley...Let’s see, um...Sammy, Rosie, why don’t you jump in there, too…”

Jill continues to split them up and assign partners, but Christen is too distracted to pay too much attention to who else is on her team or the opposing team for that matter because Tobin is at her side offering her a smile. 

Tobin nudges her gently with her elbow, and Christen feels warmth flood through her. She prays she’s not blushing when Tobin says, “So I guess we’re partners, huh?” 

Christen’s mouth goes dry, but she manages a smile and an “uh-huh.” It would be nice if her heart wasn’t pounding quite so loudly in her ears, though, so she could focus, she thinks. 

“Sweet. Let me ditch the camera. Somehow I think it’ll be a little distracting. Although I can’t help feeling like I’m slacking at my actual job.”

Tobin’s grin is infectious, and Christen finds her own smile becoming less forced and more natural in response. 

Christen can’t help the way her eyes trail Tobin as she jogs to the sidelines and stores her camera safely in its bag. She tells herself not to stare, but damn Tobin has a nice ass. Not that she wants to do anything about that. She definitely does not wonder what it might be to slide her hand down Tobin’s back and grab it while their mouths are locked together in a passionate embrace and their tongues dance. Nope. Not at all. 

(Fuck.)

Her eyes flick up as Tobin turns around to face her and heads back in her direction. She ignores the tension coiling in her gut as best she can. “Get your head in the game,” she mutters to herself as Tobin jogs back. 

“Hm?” Tobin asks, but Christen just shakes her head. “Nothing.” 

“So shall we go rock this drill, or what?” Tobin says with a grin. 

“See how many of them you can ‘meg while we do it,” Christen responds, thankful that her competitive nature is taking over so that she can actually focus a little on the task at hand. 

Tobin’s face flashes with something that Christen can’t quite place, but then her grin is firmly back in place and she throws her head back and laughs in a way that exposes the invitingly soft-looking skin of her throat, and Christen has to look at the ground to stop herself from imagining what it might be like to kiss her way down it. 

“Deal,” Tobin replies, holding out her hand. 

Christen only hesitates for a split second before shaking it. It’s warm and smooth and Christen doesn’t really want to let go, but Tobin does quickly and heads over to pull a piny on, so Christen follows suit. 

Kelley and Rose go up against Abby and Jess, and things get physical quickly. Jess almost scores, but Kelley is a brick wall, and wins the ball back, streaking upfield before crossing quickly to Rose. Christen is ready to cheer for her team’s point, but Abby somehow gets a foot on it, keeping it out of goal, and then Jess and Rose race to it, Jess beating Rose by a narrow margin. Kelley can’t quite get back fast enough, and the ball is in the net, so then Allie and Sammy are up from their team. 

Tobin and Christen are the fourth set of partners to go up, and Tobin absently dribbles the ball at her feet as she watches the pairs play. She’s not really looking at her touches, but they seem easy anyway, and Christen can’t help but think that’s hot. 

Jess and Abby take down Allie and Sammy, too, but then Crystal and Carli score on them. Sonny and Moe take off with the ball, making Crystal and Carli chase them down, but they both have the speed, and another good battle ensues before Carli gets one in the back of the net. Ali and Andi run in, but, despite Ali’s best defensive efforts and Andi getting the ball away from Carli for a short breakaway, they can’t manage to score on them either. Alex and Pinoe run in next and their on-field chemistry is as good as ever as they sprint down, cross and put it in the back of the net before Crystal and Carli can backtrack towards their goal. 

Christen is about to say, “That’s us,” but Tobin’s already chipping the ball at her feet onto the field and racing after it, so Christen takes off, too, setting herself up wide for a pass. 

Tobin doesn’t really look up at her, focused instead on Alex, charging at her, but then the ball is sailing through Alex’s legs mid-stride and towards Christen. Christen turns on her speed just a little to reach the ball and head towards goal, but Pinoe steals it off of her with a hard tackle that almost takes her to the ground. 

She doesn’t take a second to get her breath, though. Instead, she turns on a dime and chases Pinoe down. She has the edge, speed-wise, and she uses it to her advantage, getting a slide in to send the ball back in Tobin’s direction. Tobin dribbles it back the other way and Christen is back on her feet as quick as she can to back her up, Alex hot on Tobin’s heels. 

Christen sees the tackle coming, but it’s like Tobin can sense it, too, because the moment before Aex goes for it, Tobin sends the ball up through the air in Christen’s direction, and Christen gets her head on it. It’s not the neatest header in the world, but it makes it into the goal and that’s what matters. 

Tobin lets out a whoop and Kelley calls out, “How’d it feel to nutmeg the face of US Women’s Soccer?” to a spattering of laughter as Julie and AD come out onto the field, Julie charging hard. 

Christen just catches Alex giving Kelley the finger out of the corner of her eyes before she’s chasing Julie down. 

Christen barely gets a foot on the ball and flicks it towards Tobin, dancing around Julie, knowing just how powerful she is. Christen doesn’t stand a chance against her in a collision. AD was made to block shots, though, and she’s quick to fall back and defend, not charging head on like a defender would, but observant, depending on catlike reflexes as Tobin tries some tricky dribbling. Julie wastes no time in getting back down the field either, but she leaves Christen unguarded as she goes after the one she deems an easier target. AD is clearly anticipating another nutmeg, keeping her feet close together, but Tobin doesn’t opt for that. Christen almost loses focus on the task at hand as Tobin kicks the ball up behind her so that it arcs over Julie and towards Christen. 

Christen bites back a gasp at the beautiful rainbow, but she hears audible ones from the sidelines as she has one, two quick touches, then shoots with her left, sinking it into the back of the net. 

Becky and Lindsey are out on the field with a ball before Christen can even think to catch her breath and Lindsey with her raw power receives a sailing pass from Becky. 

Tobin is there, though, all quick feet and surprising bursts of speed, and she takes the ball right off of Lindsey’s feet and passes it right to Christen. 

Christen takes off with it. She knows Becky. She knows how she plays. She’s practiced with and against her for club and for country for years. She reads her defensive plan in her movements, in the shuffle of her feet and the tensing of her shoulders. She reads her anticipation of a shot, so Christen doesn’t shoot. She passes back to Tobin, who charges ahead, catching Lindsey off-guard. Becky runs towards her, but Tobin sees her coming. 

It’s a nutmeg and a goal in one amazing touch and Christen wants to laugh, but they’re still going, and Abby and Jess have already taken down two sets of partners on their team, and their legs are a little fresher for their short break. 

Tobin steals the ball from Jess, putting it straight through her legs for one of her quickest nutmegs yet, but Abby’s defense is sharp, and in the end Tobin and Christen have to cycle out as Jess heads it in off of a long pass. 

Ash and Mal head on, high fiving them as they cross paths. 

“That was amazing!” Christen declares, though a small voice at the back of her head tells her not to gush too much. She doesn’t think about it too much, though, when she steps forward and throws her arms around Tobin pulling her into a hug. She tells herself it’s how she’d celebrate that scoring streak with any teammate she’d been partnered with. 

(It’s not a total lie, at least.)

Tobin’s a little sweaty, but she still smells clean, like fresh washed clothes and vanilla lotion. It’s a heady mix, and Christen forces herself to step away rather than hold Tobin close, their bodies pressed together the way she really wants to. 

Tobin beams at her, but then Allie is throwing an arm around her shoulders saying, “Crazy moves, Harry! You’re going to have to teach me to rainbow.”

Then Crystal is sliding up saying, “Nice ‘megs, girl! How many are you up to now?”

Tobin scrunches up her face adorably as she thinks. “Nine, I think? Counting Sonny yesterday.” 

“Nope, doesn’t count. It was before the challenge started,” Sammy says. 

“What? It totally counts. She already nutmegged her,” Christen steps in. 

“Sonny, does Tobin’s nutmeg of you yesterday count?” Sammy calls across to where Sonny’s standing next to Lindsey laughing about something. 

“No way! And she won’t get me again!”

“Eight then,” Tobin amends, but Christen still feels annoyed. 

The whole point was to see if Tobin could nutmeg everyone on the team and clearly she’s already nutmegged Sonny, so clearly she’s capable of it. She’s about to open her mouth to argue more, but then Mal sinks a gorgeous goal and Ali and Andi are running on and Christen gets swept back up in the 2 v 2. 

  
  


By the time they make it to twenty points (and Christen can’t help feeling slightly smug that she and Tobin are at least half responsible for their team’s win), Tobin has managed to add Pinoe and Julie to the list of people she’s nutmegged. 

Christen tells herself she’s not disappointed when Tobin resumes taking photos for the next drill. She tells herself she didn’t feel incredibly alive running with her, passing to her, scoring with her, forging an on field connection with her -

She tells herself that over and over as she moves into the rest of practice. She tells herself she doesn’t glance to the sidelines more often than she used to (and definitely not to search Tobin out). 

She tells herself this and a dozen other lies, but the problem, she realizes as Tobin offers her a smile with a lip bite and a high five as she jogs off the field, is that she knows she’s lying. 

“You were awesome out there,” Tobin says, and Christen can feel her cheeks flush with heat. 

It’s an innocuous compliment. In fact she high fives Kelley, too and says, “Nice work, KO!” 

It doesn’t  _ mean _ anything, but the thing is - 

The thing is that Christen  _ wants _ it to. 

Tobin snags a few shots of everyone cooling down, and Christen is just about to head to the locker rooms when she feels a ball knock against the inside of her ankle then bounce off her opposite foot. She stares down at it in confusion for a moment, watching it roll on a few feet before stopping.

Then Tobin knocks her shoulder against Christen’s, and her voice is so close that Christen can feel Tobin’s breath hitting her ear as she teases, “Got you.”

Christen has never been more okay with being nutmegged, and it’s possible that she’s never blushed harder. “Yeah. Guess you did,” Christen replies, her voice cracking slightly. 

If only Tobin realized how much. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelley overridesTobin's afternoon plans, but she gets to be with christen so she doesn't really mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This did not go where I thought it was going to when I started it. Apparently we have to wait a bit before the end of the nutmeg challenge. Go figure. As always, if you like it, let me know in the comments, please!

“No, I’m pretty sure you need a glimpse into our hotel life.” 

Kelley’s arm around her is firm, leaving little room for argument, but Tobin tries anyway. “You do understand that part of my job as a photographer is going through the pictures and editing them and stuff, right? They don’t just magically get ready for the client by themselves as soon as I snap them.” 

Kelley waves away the complaint. “You can do it later. There will be plenty of time.”

“Kelley, I’m still working on the photos for the calendar!” Tobin tries again. 

“You mean the naked ones,” Kelley replies with a mischievous wiggle of her eyebrows. “Why? Do you keep getting caught up staring at our awesomely hot bodies?”

“Kelley!” Christen chides from behind them, and Tobin hates that her mind instantly flashes to Christen’s pictures. 

She’s looked at them more than once. She tells herself it’s for professional reasons. She’s checking which has the best lighting. Which is framed the best. Which might be the best to put on the calendar. 

(She tells herself she’ll be able to pick which ones are the best options when really she thinks they’re all absolutely stunning.)

In truth her eyes trace the defined lines of Christen’s abs, the curve of her ass, the muscles in her shoulders, the flow of her hair, and always, without fail, she gets sucked in by her incredible grey-green eyes. She’s never seen eyes quite like them. 

(She searches for any hint of the heart-eyes her friends claim to see, but there is none. It’s a photograph not a miracle worker.)

“Sorry about her,” Christen’s saying, coming up beside them, her arm brushing Tobin’s and sending electric tingles up it. 

“Would you believe I’m getting used to her?” Tobin replies with a grin. 

“That’s worrying,” Christen says with a laugh that’s musical and light and floods Tobin with warmth. 

“Hey!” Kelley protests, and Tobin snaps back to reality. 

She’s just a photographer on a job. Okay, maybe she’s actually making friends with the team members, but that’s all she’ll ever be to them. Besides, soon they’ll be gone, their jobs and lives carrying them far away to live a life Tobin can never really be a part of. 

Tobin’s life will go back to normal. Engagement sessions, newborn sessions, family photography, Christmas specials, weddings littering her summer, and club soccer. She’s fine with that. It’s how it’s supposed to be. 

She’s fine. 

She’ll be fine. 

Christen’s looking at her with curious eyes and Tobin wonders if somehow she’s let her sinking heart show on her face. That’s not very professional of her, if so. 

“Apparently Kelley is kidnapping me for the afternoon. She said something about a drink for eleven nutmegs already and none of them being her...yet.”

“Ever,” Kelley corrects and Tobin laughs. 

She knows she can get her, she just has to catch her off-guard. 

“I got Chris,” she points out, realizing too late that the nickname was probably a bit too familiar for her to be using. It had rolled off her tongue without her even thinking about it, but now she’s regretting it. She looks at Christen to gauge her reaction, ready to apologize, but Christen’s eyes are wide and her expression isn’t angry or annoyed. Tobin can’t really place it, but it doesn’t seem negative. She can feel heat rising in her cheeks just the same, though. It’s surprise, Tobin decides in the end. She’s surprised by it. That’s all. “I mean, Christen,” she corrects, just to be on the safe side. 

Christen’s arm brushes hers again as she walks and Tobin does her best not to get distracted by the warmth that floods through her at the touch and the tension that’s coiling low in her gut. 

“Chris is fine,” Christen says, her voice soft. She bites her lip, just for a second, as she looks at Tobin, and Tobin is struck by the idea that Christen is nervous about something. 

But then Kelley is saying, “And you can call me Kelley the Amazing,” and Tobin forgets all about it as she laughs. 

  
  
  


Kelley gives her her spot on the bus. She had insisted that she could have driven to the hotel in her own car (and then not been trapped there), but Kelley seems insistent on holding her hostage. 

Still, at least she gets to sit next to Christen. 

Of course, breathing normally would be easier if she WEREN’T sitting next to Christen. 

“You okay?” Christen asks. 

Tobin nods, biting her lip to keep herself from blurting out anything stupid like, “Yeah, it’s just you’re really hot and I’m really aware of your thigh pressing against mine.” 

“I’ve made Kelley promise to call you an uber to get you back to your car later,” Christen informs her.

Tobin probably would have been able to reply in a fairly normal way, if Christen hadn’t decided to pat her comfortingly on the knee. 

Christen’s hand is warm and smooth on the bare skin of her knee and Tobin swallows hard, desperate to force down the sudden lump in her throat. She can’t take her eyes off of Christen’s hand until Christen must feel so uncomfortable that she snatches it back with a mumbled apology.

Tobin’s made it weird. She knows she has. She needs to say something. Anything. 

“Okay,” she croaks, her voice hoarse. She clears her throat. “Cool.” 

She knows that it’s not actually possible that the skin where Christen’s hand touched is still burning, but it sure feels that way. She can feel her cheeks burning, too, and knows that another blush is forming there. She really needs to get ahold of her blush reflex if she’s going to survive this job. 

“Sorry if it was sweaty,” she blurts a moment later, wishing instantly that she could take it back. 

“What?” Christen turns to her in surprise. 

Tobin momentarily gets distracted by the green of her eyes. They’re so close, sitting next to each other on the bus, that Tobin can make out the patterns in her irises. 

“My knee,” she mumbles after a pause that lasts a second too long. 

“Oh. No. It’s fine.”

“I just figured I’d get to go home and shower after this, you know? I didn’t think to bring a change of clothes. I probably smell. Sorry.” 

Tobin sniffs at her shirt and grimaces at the smell of dried sweat, but Christen shakes her head and smiles. 

“It’s fine. Honest. You don’t smell bad.” 

Tobin raises an eyebrow at her. “You know I have a nose. I KNOW you’re lying.”

Christen laughs. “You should get a whiff of Alyssa’s gloves when she takes them off after a game. Compared to that, nothing smells bad.”

“Hey!” Alyssa protests from behind them. 

“Accurate,” Sonny calls. 

Tobin giggles and the awkward tension that had descended between them seems to break a little. 

“You can shower at the hotel if you want. My clothes would probably fit you,” Christen offers. “I know what it’s like to just want to get clean.” 

Christen’s voice sounds a little huskier, though Tobin’s not sure why, but she IS sure that it’s doing  _ things _ to her. She clears her throat and manages to reply, “Um, yeah, sure. Thanks. If you’re sure you don’t mind,” in a fairly normal voice. 

“Yeah, no. It’s no problem,” Christen assures her. 

“Great. Thanks.” She’ll get to shower. She won’t have to smell like dried sweat for the rest of the day. She’s gonna get a shower and feel all refreshed and then maybe being kidnapped won’t be so bad. 

She’ll get to shower in Christen’s hotel room. Naked. With a wall between them. 

And then she’ll put on Christen’s clothes. 

She’s fine. She’s totally fine. 

She is definitely not about to have a panic attack on the bus with the USWNT. 

“You okay?” Christen asks her again. 

“Yep. All good.” 

At least Christen doesn’t pat her on the knee again this time. 

  
  


“Okay, so, good on towels, good on clothes, you know how to work the shower?” 

Tobin laughs and bites her lip. Christen playing hostess is ridiculously adorable. Kelley smirking at them from her bed across the room is less so. “I’m pretty sure I’ve used a hotel shower before. I think I can figure it out.”

Christen blushes and ducks her head as she mumbles, “Right. Yeah, of course.” 

Tobin reaches out and touches her arm comfortingly. She can’t help it. Christen makes her WANT to touch her. It’s kind of a problem. “It’s fine. It’s cute.”

Kelley laughs across the room and Tobin realizes what she’s just said. She turns a glare on Kelley, glad that Christen has turned to look at her, too, so she can’t see her expression. 

Kelley holds up her phone, the picture of innocence. “Sorry. Text from Sonny. It was funny.”

Tobin narrows her eyes skeptically, but Kelley just smiles a broad smile at them before turning back to her phone and typing something. 

Christen turns back to her with a smile that Tobin tries not to think of as “dazzling”. “Okay, so do you need anything else? Feel free to use any of the shampoo and whatnot. Oh, washcloth?”

Instead of saying, “Thank you for ignoring that I called you cute,” Tobin says, “Aren’t they hanging up with the towels?” 

Christen nods. “Yes. True. Okay. So, you’re good?” 

“I think so. I’ll be quick.” 

“Take your time,” Kelley calls. “Enjoy yourself.”

Tobin might actually kill her. Sonny’s a pretty good right back. The team will only miss her a little. 

Christen has turned to look at Kelley again, so Tobin takes the opportunity to flip her off, but Kelley just grins at her again. 

“She’s annoying, but she’s right. Don’t feel like you have to rush. We’ve got downtime to kill.”

Tobin nods. “Thanks.” She heads into the bathroom without blurting out anything else stupid, feeling minutely more relaxed when the door clicks shut behind her. She locks it for good measure. Not that she thinks either Christen or Kelley would actually try to come in, but it makes her feel a tiny bit better. 

She sets Christen’s borrowed clothes carefully in a dry spot next to the sink, then turns on the water. 

She makes sure her towel is close enough that she’ll be able to reach it without dripping water all over the bathroom floor first, then she takes her hair out, shaking it out and running her fingers through it. She takes out her contacts and puts them in the spare case she always keeps in her camera bag, grateful for it today. Steam is already starting to swirl around the bathroom so she shuts out all thoughts of Christen and soccer and borrowed clothes and strips down. 

The hot water feels good as it streams down over her head, washing away the grime and sweat she’d built up earlier, urging her muscles to unwind and relax. Steam rises around her as she scrubs and washes, digging her fingers into her scalp, stretching and turning to make sure the water hits everywhere.

It’s refreshing and she maybe lingers a little long, letting the water cascade over her and head, closing her eyes and simply letting it wash over her. 

Everything is going fine right up until she runs a soapy hand across her breast and her brain decides to think about seeing Christen naked for the first time at the same time. She remembers Christen moving her arm and seeing her breast in full. She remembers the urge to reach out and touch and how strong that had been, how she’d barely been able to pry her eyes away. How was it possible that one person was so incredibly gorgeous? 

Tobin feels herself getting turned on just at the thought, and she brushes her thumb past her own nipple, unable to keep herself from wondering what it might feel like if it was Christen’s thumb instead. 

It sends a shudder down her spine. She lets her eyes drift closed again and caresses her breast gently before pinching at the nipple. It’s not very much of a touch, but she can already feel heat pooling low in her stomach and, God, she’s reactive today. 

It’s all because of Christen. Christen who is gorgeous and talented and has the most stunning smile and the sweetest personality. Christen with her kind eyes and her casual touches that set Tobin’s body on fire. 

Christen, Tobin reminds herself, who is part of her current job and nothing else. 

She pulls her hand off her breast so fast that she accidentally elbows a bottle of shampoo from the thin ledge around the shower. 

She fumbles to catch it, and fails, managing instead to send another bottle of shampoo and a bottle of conditioner crashing into the tub with a loud bang. 

And then there’s knocking at the door, and Christen’s voice is calling in sounding all concerned, asking, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah! Yeah. Fine. Just...knocked some stuff over!” Her voice comes out strained and croaky and she can just imagine Kelley laughing about it in the next room. She can feel a blush burning across her cheeks and neck. She’s suddenly acutely aware of how little space actually exists between Christen and her very naked body. 

She does a final rinse and turns off the shower quickly. She rushes through toweling off and only slows as she’s pulling on Christen’s royal blue T-shirt. It’s soft and has a clean scent that reminds her of Christen and she breathes in deeply as she tugs it down over her head, feeling the fabric settle on her body, sticking gently to a wet spot on her back she apparently didn’t dry well enough. The shorts are next. Soccer shorts, loose and comfortable, with a 23 on the leg. It gives Tobin a fuzzy feeling inside, knowing that not only is she standing here in Christen’s clothes, but she’s wearing her number. It doesn’t mean anything. Obviously Christen just grabbed something she had with her that was clean. Still, Tobin can’t help but smile. 

“Kel, can I use your brush?” she calls out through the door, eyeing the brush with light brown hair trapped in the bristles. 

“As long as you don’t have lice!” is her reply and it makes her laugh. 

She picks it up, cleans it out, and brushes her hair, putting half of it up in a top knot just to get it out of her face while she dries. 

She eyes the contact solution and feels the strain in her eyes already from hours spent peering through a lens and her early morning editing pictures, and she can’t bring herself to put them back in. 

She opens the door to the bathroom and is met with a wall of cooler air as the humid air from the bathroom flows out around her. She goes straight to her camera bag, dropping in her contact case and digging out her glasses case. Only once they’re securely on her face does she turn to see what Kelley and Christen are up to. 

Christen’s eyes are wide and her cheeks look a bit pink, and Tobin can only assume that Kelley’s been teasing her about something or other. 

“What’d I miss?” Tobin asks, a grin tugging at the corners of her mouth. 

“Nothing!” Kelley says, popping up off her bed and coming to stand beside Christen, slinging an arm over her shoulder. 

Christen jumps a little, her eyes still on Tobin. Her mouth is slightly parted like she’s thinking about saying something, so Tobin looks at her expectantly, waiting for her to contradict Kelley’s obvious lie. 

She swallows hard, and Tobin can’t help the way that her eyes trail down her throat at the sight. She snaps them back up quickly when she realizes, turning her eyes back to Kelley, who looks far too amused. 

“The glasses are a really cute look for you, Tobito. Don’t you think she looks cute in the glasses, Chris?” 

Christen swallows again and nods. “Mhm. Yeah. Good look.” Her voice has a hoarse quality that sends heat rushing through Tobin.

Tobin can’t help wondering if maybe she missed Christen yelling at Kelley about something while she was in the bathroom, for her voice to sound like that now. 

“And she looks really good in your clothes. Very comfy,” Kelley adds. 

Tobin can feel Christen’s eyes travel down her body and back up quickly, and she knows there’s a blush now tingeing her own cheeks as a result. She silently wills it away, as Christen nods. 

“Yeah. Good. Glad they fit,” Christen says. 

Tobin looks down, brushing her hands over the clothes, as if checking that what Christen just said is in fact true, even though obviously everything fits fine. “Yeah. Thanks again.”

Christen nods, now not quite making eye contact. “Yeah no problem.”

Kelley looks from Christen to Tobin and back again, a smirk gracing her cheeks, and Tobin knows that she’s trying to tease her. She just KNOWS that Kelley is aware of her crush. Or at least suspicious of it. She narrows her eyes at Kelley to focus on anything but the now slightly awkward silence that continues to stretch between her and Christen. 

“So!” Kelley declares loudly with a clap of her hands that makes both Tobin and Christen jump. “We have some fun hotel activities for our dear photographer friend lined up.”

Christen looks surprised, but Tobin feels suspicious. 

“First up: we are going visiting. Grab your camera, Tobito. Time to see how we live on the road.”

Tobin warily does as instructed and heads for the door, but Kelley is back in her bed, typing away furiously into her phone. “Uh, Kel?” she prompts. 

Kelley ignores her, and Tobin snaps a picture just to spite her. 

“Kelley?” she tries again. 

“Hey, O’Hara!” Christen yells, and then, it’s almost like Tobin sees it coming, because she brings her camera up ready, and then Christen is taking a flying leap into Kelley’s bed beside her, snatching her phone out of her hands in the process, and Tobin manages to capture it all, her finger holding down on the button as continuous mode snaps picture after picture in rapid succession. 

Tobin giggles as Kelley hollers “Hey!”, but she’s already starting to laugh, and Christen has a massive smile as she holds Kelley’s phone out away, taunting, “What now, O’Hara?” 

Christen starts to read what Kelley was typing, and her expression turns to annoyance, but then Kelley is tickling her side and Christen shrieks. 

“I’m gonna kill you Kelley!” she threatens, as Kelley gets the upper hand, knocking Christen over and climbing onto her before successfully grabbing her phone back.

Tobin somehow manages to hold her camera steady enough to keep taking pictures despite her laughing, and she grins triumphantly as Kelley climbs off of Christen and then looks expectantly at her. “Ready to go, Tobito Glassito?”

Tobin furrows her brows in confusion. “What?”

“‘Cause the glasses?” Kelley explains. 

Tobin shakes her head. “Nope.”

Kelley sighs dramatically. “Fiiine.”

Christen steps over, fixing her hair a little self-consciously. “So are we actually going visiting now? I’d like to talk to Alex.”

Kelley grins at her. “Yep. Julie and Crystal’s room first. Let’s go.”

She bounds out of the room leaving Tobin and Christen staring after her. 

“Is she planning something?” Tobin asks. 

Christen sighs. “Almost always.”

“Do I wanna know?” 

Christen shakes her head. “I’ve found it’s better not to.”

“Should we follow?” 

“Probably.” 

Tobin grins. She can’t help it. She wants to smile all the time when she’s around Christen. 

It’s a problem. 

It’s going to be a big problem.

She needs to get this under control now.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin is too adorable for her own good and Christen fights the urge to murder every one of her teammates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this update happened quicker than I anticipated. I wouldn't get used to it, though. I hope you enjoy!

Christen is TRYING to keep her eyes to herself. She really is. She doesn’t MEAN to stare. 

It’s just that Tobin fits in her clothes SO well. And the number 23 stands out on her leg as a constant reminder that they are, in fact, Christen’s clothes that she’s in.

And she hadn’t even complained about wearing her number, like she doesn’t mind the idea that people might think that she’s with Christen. 

Not that she is. Not that she’s probably even thought about that. 

Christen’s reading too much into it and she KNOWS that, it’s just -

Tobin’s pulled her hair elastic down so it’s a little wavy down around her face, and she’s got her glasses on -

HER GLASSES.

Fuck. 

It was one thing when she was hot, but now she’s also adorably cute. It shouldn’t be possible. 

Christen catches herself looking again, but this time Tobin catches her too. She feels her cheeks flush with heat, and she knows she’s blushing as she looks away, but there’s this cute little smile tugging at the corner of Tobin’s mouth and this little twinkle in her eyes and she finds herself glancing back again a moment later. 

“What?” Tobin asks, and Christen can hear the hint of self-consciousness in her voice. 

She’s made her self-conscious.

Fuck. 

“Nothing,” Christen assures her quickly. 

Tobin raises an eyebrow at her, and Christen can tell that she doesn’t quite believe her. 

“Nothing. I just- You-” Christen stops herself and tries again, racking her brain for anything that she can say by way of explanation that doesn’t betray the fact that she was ogling her. 

Tobin looks at her expectantly. 

“You look cute in glasses,” she blurts, feeling her cheeks burn even more. Nope. That was not it. 

Tobin’s grin is shy as she tucks her hair behind her ear, and murmurs, “Oh. Thanks.” 

“I mean-” Christen pauses. “You’re- You- Sorry.” 

Tobin looks at her with a puzzled expression on her face. “For calling me cute?” 

“Yeah. NO! I-”

Tobin giggles and Christen realizes that she’s being teased. 

“If you two are done flirting...” Kelley declares, and Christen realizes that she’s come to a stop outside of someone’s room and her hand is poised to knock, but she’s looking at them with a smirk on her face. 

“We weren’t-” Tobin says quickly, as Christen says, “Kelley, don’t be annoying.” 

Kelley’s eyes flick from her to Tobin and her smirk grows bigger. “Okay, well, we have arrived.”

It’s their fourth room and Christen is hoping that it’s Alex’s because she’d still very much like to have words with her. She does NOT need to feed Kelley’s tendency to tease. She REALLY did not have to offer to do CPR if Christen passed out. 

They’re jerks. All her teammates are jerks. 

“TOBIN!” Alex greets as Allie shouts, “Harry!”, and Christen throws up her arms as if to say, “What about me and Kelley?” 

She’s ignored as Alex and Allie pull Tobin into their room. 

“Welcome to our crib,” Allie says, launching into an entire spiel that they’ve obviously rehearsed, acting like they’re on an episode of MTV’s Cribs. As if all of their rooms aren’t pretty much exactly the same. As if this hotel room is somehow drastically different from all the others they’ve stayed in so far this year. 

Christen rolls her eyes, and tugs Alex back. “CPR is for when people aren’t breathing, not when they’re unconscious,” she mutters through clenched teeth. 

Alex grins and shrugs. “Kel said you weren’t breathing.”

“She does NOT need encouragement, Al.”

Alex leans in even closer and lowers her voice even more. “But you are so very smitten, Chris.”

Christen wants to protest. She wants to argue. She has no ground to stand on and she knows it, but she doesn’t want that to be the case. Before she gets a chance, though, Alex dances away and continues Allie’s tour of their room. 

Tobin dutifully snaps pictures, laughing from behind the camera at their antics.

When they leave Allie and Alex’s room, the two of them follow along. 

“Next stop: Sonny and Lindsey!” Kelley declares as they move on down the hall. 

Christen groans. They’ll be just as bad as Kelley and Alex, and having all of them along may as well be described as a form of torture in a situation like this. 

Kelley hangs back at the door, offering Tobin the honors of knocking, and then Christen feels a slight shove from behind just before the door swings open. 

“Tobin! With Christen! What a surprise!” Sonny declares, looking not remotely surprised. 

Christen isn’t really a fan of violence, but she’s not sure she’ll be able to last the day without hitting SOMEONE on her team at this point. 

“And Kelley and Alex and Allie,” Christen points out, gesturing behind them. 

“Oh yeah, them,” Sonny replies with a cheeky grin, holding the door open wider. “Lindsey, look! It’s Tobin and Christen!”

“And others!” Christen calls into the room, bumping her shoulder against Sonny a little hard as she walks past her.

“Are you in Christen’s shorts?” Lindsey asks by way of greeting, and Sonny’s eyes drop to Tobin’s legs and then go wide. 

“Oh my God, you ARE!” Sonny declares in a gleeful voice. 

Christen shoots them both a warning glance. They’re going to make Tobin feel self-conscious and then she’ll never want to borrow clothes from any of them again. 

Tobin just shrugs, though. “I needed something clean to wear after my shower.” 

“Oh. You showered?” Lindsey asks. 

“Alone?” Sonny adds, face the picture of innocence. 

Christen might actually commit murder today. 

Tobin’s cheeks flush pink and Christen hates how cute she finds it, as Tobin mutters, “Yes. Alone. Who else would- ? Nevermind. I don’t want to know what you guys thought.”

“Good choice,” Christen advises, though she has a guess. She knows her teammates are trying to get under her skin and have something to tease her about. Poor Tobin is just getting caught in the crosshairs. 

Tobin heads deeper into the room, led by Sonny so that Sonny can show her the dance moves she’s been working on recently and Tobin starts snapping pictures as she bites back a giggle. Christen hangs back a little, though, forcing herself to look away from Tobin being absolutely adorable to glare at Kelley. She’s thankful for the music Sonny puts on because it gives her a chance to call out her best friend without Tobin overhearing. 

“Did you put everyone up to this?” she demands. 

Alex and Allie look away tellingly. Christen doesn’t for one second think that they’re actually suddenly very interested in the hotel’s choice in wallpaper. 

“Up to what?” Kelley asks with a grin, batting her eyes at Christen. 

“You know exactly what, Kelley Maureen O’Hara.”

“Oooh, middle name. Kelley’s in trooouble,” Allie murmurs in a sing-song voice, shrinking away when Christen turns her glare on her. 

“People are just reacting to what they see, Chris,” Kelley replies, not looking nearly concerned enough about Christen being annoyed with her. 

“And what exactly do you think that is, Kelley?” Christen demands. 

Kelley shrugs. “Two people who seem to like each other?” 

Christen rolls her eyes. “Look, I know you guys think I have -” Christen cuts herself off and glances at Tobin to make sure she’s still far enough away to not overhear and not paying attention before lowering her voice to a whisper and hissing, “-a crush on her or something, but I think the joke’s gone on long enough. Leave her out of it at least.” 

Kelley just looks at her for a long moment, then shakes her head. “You really don’t see it?”

“See what?” Christen demands. 

Kelley just shakes her head again and sighs. “Nothing. Chris. We’ll lay off. At least around Tobin.”

As if she’d heard her name, Tobin heads back over at that exact moment, leaving Christen unable to press the matter further. It doesn’t stop her from wondering what Kelley might have meant as they head out of Sonny’s room to go find Sammy and Rosie so that she can “properly show off their choreography”. What doesn’t she see? What does Kelley think she sees? 

Tobin falls into step beside her and bumps her shoulder gently with her own, breaking her out of her thoughts. 

“Are hotel afternoons always like this?” she asks quietly, her brown eyes searching Christen’s face with an earnest curiosity that Christen can’t help finding adorable. 

Christen shrugs. “Usually they’re a little less tour-guide-y, but someone is always up to some antics. Just appreciate the lack of jump scares.”

“Oh God,” Tobin murmurs, clearly not thrilled at the idea. 

“Yep,” Christen nods. “I work with idiots.”

Tobin giggles and the sound sends a little ripple of warmth through Christen. She finds herself smiling at Tobin, earlier concerns dissipating. She’s about to see if she can coax another laugh out of Tobin when Sonny yells out, “ROSIE!” and Tobin disappears back behind her camera as dancing begins to happen right there in the middle of the hallway, no music to be heard. 

  
  


“You can always just crash here,” Kelley points out. 

Christen is torn between wanting to strangle her best friend and wanting Tobin to say yes. 

“I don’t have any clothes. Or pajamas. Or a toothbrush. Or-”

“Dude, we’re literally in a hotel. One call to the front desk fixes the toothbrush problem, I’m sure. And WE have clothes. You’re already wearing some of them.”

“Or a bed,” Tobin points out. 

“Chris will share hers,” Kelley volunteers. 

She’s definitely going to go with the strangling option. She makes a slicing motion across her throat as she catches Kelley’s eye over Tobin’s shoulder. 

“I couldn’t ask her to do that,” Tobin argues. “You can’t ask her to do that either.” 

Christen laughs. “Ha. Someone was raised right, at least.”

“Yeah, me, offering our guest a place to stay for the night so she doesn’t have to drag herself all the way home and then meet us back at the field in the morning,” Kelley retorts. 

Christen hates that she has a bit of a point. She’s not sure she can survive a night lying in the same bed with Tobin. God, what if Tobin’s morning voice is all scratchy and husky and sexy. What if she’s somehow even more adorable blinking open sleepy eyes first thing. Christen’s not sure she could handle that. She’s already having a hard enough time keeping this crush in check. 

But it doesn’t make sense, when it’s getting late and they’ve already eaten and Tobin has all her equipment with her already and she can easily just borrow more clothes. (Plus, Tobin looks so good in her clothes.)

“You can stay, if you want,” Christen offers, her mouth not waiting for her brain to reach an agreement with itself. 

Tobin turns and looks at her, her expression hard to read. “No, honestly, I need to get all the pics I took today off the card so I have space to photograph whatever Kelley hijacks me to do tomorrow,” Tobin explains. 

“Oh. Right. Yeah. That makes sense.”

Christen tells herself she’s not disappointed. She’s not. She’s relieved. Well, she’s relieved more than anything else. 

Probably. 

Except that Tobin’s looking up at her through those long lashes of hers with a shy smile, and the thick-rimmed glasses she’s wearing just continue to add an extra layer of adorableness, and Christen’s mouth is a little dry just at the sight. 

“Thanks for offering, though,” Tobin adds with a smile. 

“Why didn’t I get thanked?” Kelley demands. 

“Probably because you kidnapped her to begin with,” Christen points out, sticking out her tongue at Kelley, focusing on her instead of Tobin, who is still looking at her in a way that makes her feel a little unsteady on her feet. 

Kelley waves away the accusation. “Fine. Whatever. I’ll call you an uber,” Kelley sulks. She pulls out her phone and starts typing something on it, a moment later declaring, “Aiden will be here in a green mazda in twelve minutes apparently.”

Tobin grins. “Thanks. I should probably just go wait outside.”

“I’ll walk you down,” Christen volunteers, probably a little too eagerly. She sees the way that Kelley raises her eyebrows a her. She tells herself she only offered so quickly so Kelley wouldn’t have the chance to volunteer her first. 

Tobin’s shaking her head and gathering her stuff, mumbling, “You don’t have to do that.”

Christen wants to, though. It’s silly. Here’s this woman that she just met a few days ago, that she’s spent rather a lot of time with in so short a time, and already she wants to spend more time with her. (Already she feels like she can’t get enough.)

She feels her cheeks flush with heat but she shrugs and grabs Tobin’s smaller backpack. “It’s fine. Least I can do after my roommate held you hostage all afternoon.”

“SHE HAD FUN!” Kelley argues, and Christen shoots Tobin a wink. 

Tobin giggles adorably, and Christen ignores the way that butterflies flutter in her stomach as a result. “All set?” she asks Tobin, who looks around the room one more time and nods. 

“See you tomorrow, Kel.”

“See you tomorrow, Tobito,” Kelley replies. 

Tobin rolls her eyes at the nickname and heads out of the door that Christen is holding open for her. 

They fall into step beside each other easily, Christen feeling suddenly unsure of what she should say as an awkward silence begins to stretch between them. 

She offers Tobin a shy smile, racking her brain for anything to say to start a conversation as they round a corner heading towards the elevators. She’s finally decided on, “I hope you really did have some fun,” but Tobin beats her to saying something. 

“Thanks again for the clothes. I’ll get them washed and back to you ASAP.”

Christen shrugs. “I’ve got a ton of shorts and can always get more. No rush.”

Tobin nods as they reach the elevators.

Christen reaches for the button at the same time Tobin does, pressing on Tobin’s finger instead. She pulls it away quickly, feeling her cheeks burn in embarrassment. “Sorry,” she mumbles. 

“It’s fine. My fault,” Tobin murmurs in reply. 

Christen risks a glance. It shouldn’t be this hard when it’s just the two of them, right? She’s making things awkward. That’s what it is. She’s let herself get in her own head with this crush and now she’s making it awkward for Tobin. Maybe she should just head back to her room and let Tobin go wait downstairs by herself. Or will that only be more awkward? 

Before Christen can decide, the elevator dings and they both step on. 

She wants Tobin as a friend. She needs to smooth things over. “I hope Kelley didn’t completely derail your plans for the day,” Christen offers, shifting the weight of Tobin’s backpack on her shoulder as the doors glide shut, closing them in together.

“No. I mean, I was gonna do some editing, but I had fun. Kelley was right about that.” Tobin chuckles and it seems like it’s half to herself as she shakes her head. 

Christen can’t tear her eyes away, tracing the creases at the corners of her eyes, the lines around her smile, her lips. Christen bites her lower lip and offers a smile of her own when Tobin’s eyes meet hers. There’s a moment where there’s a look in them that makes Christen think that Tobin caught her staring, but then it’s gone too fast for her to be sure. 

“Good,” she says, realizing she still hasn’t responded. 

Normally she’s good at talking. She has to be for her job. She’s had compliments (some bordering on more racist than others) about how well-spoken she is for most of her life. So why are words failing her so much right now? Why is she failing at such basic human communication? 

“It’s good that Kelley has you around for balance,” Tobin says. 

“Hmm?” 

“Just, like...I don’t know. I get the feeling you keep her in line. Or something. A little, maybe,” Tobin murmurs. She’s fiddling with the shoulder strap of her bag like maybe she’s not so sure of herself anymore. 

“Oh. Yeah. Kind of. To be honest I used to go along with her plans a lot more,” Christen admits as the elevator jolts to a stop, taking an extra small bounce before the doors slide open. 

They both hesitate for a moment to see who should go out first, but Christen takes a step back, making it clear that she’s going to let Tobin go first. It’s only right. Technically Tobin is the guest. 

“Wait, so you’re secretly a troublemaker, too?” Tobin asks as they make their way through the lobby. 

Christen laughs at the accusation in her tone. “No.” She thinks on it for a moment then concedes, “Maybe. I used to be.”

Tobin is eyeing her curiously and Christen finds that she wants to elaborate. She wants to give Tobin this chance to know her better. She wants to offer up this insight into her life. 

If she thinks about why too much, she knows it’ll scare her, so she starts talking instead. 

“When I got to Stanford I was nervous. Like...Playing club soccer and high school soccer, as competitive as it felt, stepping up to Stanford felt like the big leagues, like a whole new game. In the club teams I was a big fish in a little pond and then suddenly I was in this really big pond and I didn’t feel so big anymore.”

Tobin nods, clearly following. 

“And Kelley...she was only a sophomore, but she was already somehow a big fish in this big pond, and she was so full of life and energy and laughter...She was kinda magnetic. Everyone wanted to be around her. She got all the invites to parties. She got included in all the conversations. And - this probably won’t surprise you too much - she instigated all the pranks.” 

Tobin chuckles. “Yeah, I can see that.”

Christen grins at the memories. “She welcomed me with open arms even though she could have seen me as direct competition, and she took me under her wing, and...I definitely did more encouraging than reigning her in in those days,” Christen admits a little sheepishly. 

“I feel like I’d like Christen the troublemaker,” Tobin says with a laugh as they step outside. 

A cool breeze picked up and Christen wrapped her arms around herself as they came to a stop, looking out into the parking lot for any sign of Aiden in a green mazda. “Are you saying you don’t like normal me?” Christen teases, leaning in a little closer to Tobin, telling herself it’s just for the warmth she’s radiating. 

Tobin glances at her and bites her lip for a second, then shakes her head. “No. Definitely not what I’m saying.”

Christen can’t help the shiver that runs through her then or the tension that coils in her gut. “Oh yeah?” There’s a hint of something else, something she doesn’t want to acknowledge, settling tightly in her chest. Something that feels an awful lot like hope. 

Tobin’s eyes are bright as she looks at her, and there’s a sly grin on her face as she says, “I mean, you’re pretty fun just as you are, but troublemaker Christen sounds like fun, too.” 

It feels like Tobin’s leaning in a little closer, but Christen wouldn’t swear that she’s not the one who’s moved in, and she knows she needs to watch herself before she goes and does something stupid like lean in for a kiss and make everything all awkward again. She forces herself to take a small step back as she laughs. “She was okay. Kelley doesn’t need the encouragement, though.” 

Tobin laughs harder. “Yeah. That I can definitely agree on. But she is fun.”

Christen nods. “She is. She’s a good friend as much as she’s a pain in the ass. You’d never know it by the way she acts, but she can be serious when she needs to be. She’s my person I know I can call no matter the time if something’s going on and she’ll answer, even if she was sound asleep.”

“Those are good to have,” Tobin says. 

Christen keeps her eye contact with Tobin. She should look away. She needs to look away, but somehow she can’t bring herself too. Tobin’s eyes are kind and curious and her smile is wide and genuine, and Christen can’t help thinking that she could get lost just staring at her for ages. 

She swallows hard and forces her gaze away, up the driveway leading into the parking lot. “I think your ride’s here,” she says, indicating the car that was turning in. 

“Oh.” 

Christen thinks, just for a split second, that Tobin sounds almost disappointed. When she looks back at her, though, Tobin’s still smiling, adjusting the bag on her shoulder. 

The car pulls to a stop in front of them and Tobin leans in to talk to the driver through the window, confirming that he is in fact uber driver Aiden. 

She opens the door to the backseat and slings her bag in, then turns back to Christen with a smile. “I’ll take that now.”

Christen is momentarily confused before Tobin nudges the backpack still over her shoulder. She’d completely forgotten about it, and feels her cheeks flushing in embarrassment as she hands it over. “Oh, right. Here.”

“Thanks,” Tobin says, putting it over her own shoulder. She stands there for a moment, looking at Christen, and Christen feels herself growing more self-conscious by the second, and then Tobin is opening her arms and stepping in for a quick hug. “I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow, Chris.” She steps away quickly and turns her face towards the car, climbing inside as Christen takes a second to remind herself to breathe. 

“Yep, tomorrow. See you, Tobs.” The nickname slips out. She doesn’t mean it to. It just sort of happens, and as soon as it’s out she wishes she could take it back. Her eyes go wide and she’s about to apologize, but Tobin pauses, her hand on the door, and smiles. 

“Tobs,” she hums. “I like that. Just don’t let Kelley call me Toby,” she adds a moment later. 

Christen laughs and nods her head. “You’ve got it.”

Tobin shuts the door, then rolls down the window and pops her head out, her camera in hand. “Night, Troublemaker Christen!” she says as the car starts to pull away. 

Christen laughs again as Tobin lifts the camera to her face and snaps a picture. 

“Night Not-Toby!” she calls back with a wave. 

She stands there for a moment longer, watching the car drive out of sight, only realizing after the fact that she’s still smiling like an idiot. Thank God Kelley isn’t there to see her. She’d never live it down. 

  
  


Christen opens her eyes to darkness. It must be early in the morning still, she thinks. She sits up and rubs her eyes, glancing over at Kelley’s bed only to see that it’s empty. She frowns. That’s weird. 

Then she hears the shower. That’s even weirder. Why would Kelley be showering in the middle of the night? She makes her way to the bathroom. It’s different. Not how she remembered it, but she can’t quite find the time to be bothered by that fact. 

She’s not sure why she moves further in, steam curling around the room, obstructing her view. She feels propelled forward, drawn on, her feet moving across the floor without her express permission. 

There’s a figure in the shower - a tall glass encased shower with a wide shower head jutting out from the ceiling, tiled with large sandy-colored tiles inlaid with a pattern of smaller aqua ones. At first she can’t make the person out through the steam, and then she can and Christen can’t breathe. 

Tobin’s eyes are shut, her head thrown back as water cascades down over her brown hair, over her face, falling over her shoulders and on down. 

Christen swallows hard as her eyes continue on down to small, firm breasts, hardened, inviting nipples, expanses of tanned skin. 

Tobin is naked in front of her, water flowing over her toned body, and all Christen can do is stare. Tobin tilts her head back down and opens her eyes, looking straight at Christen. 

She doesn’t freak out, though. Instead she smiles. It’s not her full smile. Not the blinding kind that takes Christen’s breath away. No, this is a half smirk and it makes Christen feel hot all over. 

Really hot. Hotter than the steam coiling around her, licking at her body. 

“You coming?” Tobin asks, and Christen looks down to realize that she’s not actually wearing any clothes. 

She doesn’t want to cover up, though. She wants to join her, and she’s just been invited to do just that. 

The water is hot, but Tobin’s arms are even hotter as Christen steps into the shower and Tobin draws her into an embrace. Her body is slick against Christen’s and Christen can’t help but rub against her, feeling the effects of Tobin’s skin sliding over hers, her breasts pressing into her. Her eyes meet Tobin’s again and then they’re kissing, hands travelling slowly over each other’s bodies, tongues dancing together. It’s slow, almost too slow, and Christen can’t stop the moan that escapes her lips. She’s so turned on it’s almost uncomfortable. 

Tobin pulls back and Christen opens her eyes. Tobin’s looking up at her through long lashes, biting her lip.

“God you’re sexy,” Christen gushes, chasing after Tobin and kissing her deeply. Tobin’s hands roam over her body, and suddenly they’re not in the shower anymore, they’re laying in bed and Tobin’s body is pressing down into hers, hips thrusting between her legs.

  
  
  


Christen bolts up in bed, panting heavily. She throws off the blankets, noting the sweat on her sheets, and tries to shake off her dream. It had felt so real. She can still practically feel Tobin’s hands on her body, remember what she’d tasted like, how her lips had moved against her own. 

God, her body is aching in response to the dream, but she refuses to give in. Besides, Kelley’s just over in the next bed, snoring lightly. 

Christen gulps down some water, hoping to soothe the longing inside her and cool her down all at once. 

She repositions herself on her bed, trying to find a cool spot on her pillow. 

It takes a bit of tossing and turning, but she eventually feels herself drifting back to sleep. 

She has two clear thoughts before she falls asleep completely.

First, Kelley can NEVER find out about the dream. 

Second, how the hell is she supposed to ever look Tobin in the eye again?


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin works on completing the nutmeg challenge while trying not to get preoccupied with Christen's sudden weirdness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really appreciating everyone's feedback on this story. Seriously, the comments fuel me to write more, so thanks to everyone who's taken the time, even if it's just a word or two!

Tobin sends off the email with the link to the online album of the newborn photoshoot she did the morning after she met the USWNT with a satisfied sigh. She’d gotten up early, not something she was overly fond of, to make sure she got that done so that she could focus on her work for the team. 

As fun as hanging out with them is, it’s proving more time consuming than she’d anticipated. 

She stretches, refills her cup of coffee, then pulls up the album from the original team photoshoot. The pictures, she reminds herself, that actually have a set due date. 

She’s made it through Julie’s pictures, so she starts on Lindsey’s. So far they’ve needed very little editing, and Tobin’s appreciative both for having amazing subjects of her photos and also for taking the proper time to set up each shot and adjust the lighting. It’s made this part of her job a lot easier so far. 

She’s selected the three best shots for each player, printing them off and putting them in individual folders for the players to review. 

She flips through all of Lindsey’s first, seeing which ones jump out at her and which need maybe a little adjustment or cropping. 

She zooms in and out, making sure that nipples aren’t visible and she hasn’t missed anything unintentionally unflattering, making sure that shadows are just that, adjusting the lighting on a bruise to Lindsey’s shin to make it less noticeable. She doesn’t believe in airbrushing, but making the dark welt not stand out so much makes for an overall better picture. 

Lindsey’s body is a portrait in solidly built musculature and Tobin admires the way she was able to accentuate her toned arms and back in one shot. 

“Great legs,” she mumbles to herself as she selects her second of the three pictures she’ll print. There’s a power in them in this shot as she moves to kick the ball Sonny had thrown at her. Tobin’s just glad that nothing got too revealed in the moment because the shot is her personal favorite for Lindsey. 

She has a little more trouble picking out a third. There are two others that are pretty good, but no others that jump out at her as a must include. She settles it with a coin flip in the end and moves on to Carli’s photos. 

She’s made it through Tierna when she feels like her eyes need a break from the intensity of the work. 

She flips over, instead, to the pictures she’d downloaded off her card from yesterday. She doesn’t do a close examination, opting instead to throw any of them that stand out to her in a quick look through into another folder for future study. There’s a gorgeous one of Carli scoring a goal in practice. Another great one of Julie just hitting a header. There’s one of Andi and Tierna laughing together, looking more like sisters than teammates with their similar build and identical brown ponytails that makes Tobin smile, so she moves it to the folder, too. When she hits the hotel pictures she finds herself giggling at the memories. 

There’s one of Kelley jumping on a bed and pulling faces. There are several good ones of Sonny and Rose and Sam dancing. There’s one of Alex and Allie where they look like they’re conspiring about something. There’s Alyssa looking adorable if cold in an ice bath she’d made in her hotel room bathtub. 

And then there are the pictures of Christen.

She has to fight the urge to put every last one of them in the folder of best shots. Christen is simply stunning in all of them. It’s unfair, really, that someone can look so good in absolutely every candid shot. The green of her eyes and the cut of her jaw and the flow of her hair and the easy smile that lights up an entire room...It’s all just so-

Tobin cuts off her thoughts and takes a deep breath, shaking her head. She needs to remain professional. Christen is incredibly sweet and Tobin can tell she’s a naturally giving person, and so she knows she can’t read too much into the little gestures like letting her borrow her clothes or offering to help her with things. She doesn’t mean anything by it, and Tobin knows that if she keeps staring, keeps keeping her camera trained more often on Christen, she’s going to ruin the friendship they’re starting to build by making it awkward. Besides, Kelley and the rest of them really don’t need any more reasons to tease her. 

Tobin keeps flipping through the pictures until she hits the last one she’d taken as the Uber was driving away, and it takes Tobin’s breath away. 

There’s Christen’s dazzling smile as she laughs, and-

Tobin swallows hard as she looks closer at the picture.

She’s seeing things. It’s just the way that Christen looks when she’s happy and laughing. It’s just the way her eyes naturally look. 

It doesn’t mean anything. 

For a second, though, Tobin almost let herself believe that she saw the heart eyes her friends had claimed to see. 

Only for a second. 

She knows better. 

Besides, she has a job to do. 

  
  
  


“Ready to complete the challenge?” Kelley hollers as soon as she sees her. 

Tobin grins. “You ready to be nutmegged?” she shoots right back. 

“In your dreams, Tobito!”

Tobin throws her hands up and shrugs. She knows she can get her, she just needs to catch her off-guard. She knows today will be a little harder after her successes yesterday. Everyone will keep more of an eye out for her. She’ll get them, she’ll just have to pick her moments carefully. 

They’re still stretching, so Tobin takes the time to get a few stretches in herself and then juggle a ball a bit. It’s silly, but she’s always felt better with a ball at her feet. 

She moves closer to Christen. Not really on purpose, but possibly not entirely by accident either. 

“Hey,” she greets her with a lazy smile as she kicks the ball up and catches it with the back of her neck, balancing it there for a few seconds before letting it drop back down to her feet. 

“Hey,” Christen mumbles, not looking up to watch her trick. 

Tobin’s smile falters, just a little. “How you doing today, Troublemaker?” she asks with a hint of teasing in her voice. 

She sees a smile tug at the corners of Christen’s mouth, but she doesn’t look up still. “I’m okay,” she replies noncommittally, getting to her feet and working on a quad stretch. “You?”

Tobin is so distracted by the way Christen seems off that she misses the ball entirely and sends it sailing into Julie’s back. “Shit! Sorry!” she calls out, as Julie turns around in annoyance. “Accident!” Julie tosses the ball back in Tobin’s direction and Tobin traps it easily. 

She hears a soft giggle and turns back to Christen to see her finally properly smiling, eyes dancing as she looks at her. Except that as soon as Tobin DOES look at her, Christen turns away again. 

Tobin feels her heart sink a little. She did something to put her off. She made her feel awkward. Christen has caught on to her crush and it’s made things weird. 

“I should probably set up my stuff,” Tobin says, giving herself an easy exit as she dribbles the ball away. 

When she glances back in Christen’s direction, Kelley is standing beside her, talking to her intensely. It doesn’t seem quite like the usual teasing, and Tobin wonders what else might be up. 

  
  


Before the team has finished drills, Tobin has managed to add Sam, Ash, and Ali to her list of people she’s nutmegged. Kelley laughs at each one, and Tobin knows that’s going to come back to bite her when Tobin finally gets her. Christen smiles a small smile, but she doesn’t laugh and she doesn’t make eye contact still. 

It has Tobin replaying their conversation last night over and over as she lines up her shots. Maybe she didn’t like being called a troublemaker? She hadn’t seemed bothered in the moment, but maybe she should apologize anyway just to be sure. 

Tobin gets invited to join in on 8 v. 8, and she hears Ash mumble, “No, really, who’s bribing Jill?” which makes Tobin laugh.

They split into 3 teams with one cycling out whenever Dawn blows the whistle. 

Tobin’s team, consisting of AD, Crystal, Tierna, Andi, Moe, Alex, and Christen, stands on the sidelines first. 

Tobin keeps a ball at her feet and her eyes on the field as she moves to a spot beside Christen. She wants to make conversation. She wants to smooth things over. She wants to know what exactly she did to make this awkwardness spring up between them so that she can make it go away. She just doesn’t know how to bring up the subject. Instead she puts her foot on the ball in front of her and her hand on her hip and feels the warmth from Christen’s body just close enough that her arm occasionally grazes Tobin’s elbow. 

Crystal is standing on her other side and dances from time to time to a song that’s only playing in her head, and it makes Tobin smile, and then gives her an idea. Crystal isn’t crossed off her list yet, after all. And she’s running out of time to nutmeg them all. She discreetly shifts so that she’s a little behind Crystal.

It’s this motion that finally makes Christen look directly at her, one eyebrow raised in an unasked question, and Tobin feels a small victory at the attention, as silly as it sounds. She shoots Christen a grin and brings her finger to lips, silently asking for Christen to not bring attention to her. 

Christen seems to understand exactly what she has planned, because suddenly she’s grinning too and the sight of it floods Tobin with warmth. Tobin reaches out a foot to pull the ball back towards her, and then, while Crystal is dancing in place and before she notices, Tobin snakes it straight between her legs. 

Her reward is Christen’s giggle and Crystal turning around in surprise. 

Crystal laughs and shakes her head and says, “Dammit, I thought I’d be safe when we were on the same team!”

Tobin grins and shrugs, and she can’t stop the way she glances back at Christen. She can’t stop the way Christen’s smile fills her with a surge of longing for something more.

  
  


She gets Sonny again their first time in. Sonny’s focused more on the ball than whose feet it’s at and so Tobin gets it through her legs and races around her. 

Sonny groans and pulls a face, but when she wins the ball back a moment later, it only feels like a small triumph. 

Besides, she still has seven players left to nutmeg and one of them is Kelley, who has been hypervigilant since the challenge started. 

She manages to get the ball back from the feet of Rose, kicking it back through her legs and crossing her off her nutmeg list all at once. She doesn’t keep the ball, though, or try to go for more. She passes up to Christen who looks...surprised? 

But then it’s game mode Christen, focused Christen, who takes the ball and scores on Ash. 

When the whistle blows a minute later and the teams switch, Tobin makes a mental note of who she has left to nutmeg that’s on this team. There’s Kelley, of course. Harry, Carli, and...Alyssa will be hard. Not because she’s on guard around Tobin, but because she’s on guard around everyone. There’s a reason that more often than not she’s the starting keeper. 

Tobin sighs and glances at Christen, who looks away. Tobin’s losing count of how many times that’s happened today, and every time it does she has to bite back an apology. 

She doesn’t know what she did, but she should probably figure it out before she apologizes. 

She focuses on the ball instead. It only takes her a few minutes after the whistle blows to get Harry, who gives her a playful shove off the ball as she laughs. Christen’s there to pick it up though, and she’s running towards the goal, almost there, until Kelley stops her, Christen just dancing out of the way of Kelley’s solid form, but she loses possession anyway. Kelley passes to Carli and Carli scores just past AD’s outstretched fingers. 

“We’ll get it back,” Alex says confidently, and sure enough a few minutes later she’s darting past Abby off a pass from Tierna and faking Alyssa out the wrong way before sinking it into the back of the net. 

The intensity only ups from there, and Tobin almost forgets about her personal challenge as she gets caught up in the game, in the drills, in finding the openings. 

But then Alyssa is between her and the goal and it would be so, so very nice to get her out of the way. 

She fakes right, but Alyssa isn’t fooled. She dances the ball between her feet, going over and around it and touching it in what she hopes will be the least expected way possible. She sees Alex open for a pass and she knows she could score off of it, but…

She lunges right as she touches the ball left, and she sees Alyssa react, her step wide. It doesn’t take much to reach out a leg and pull the ball back towards her, and then it’s a quick touch to finish, right through Alyssa’s legs and into the back of the net just as the whistle blows for her team to go back to the sidelines. 

Alyssa throws her head back and groans and Sonny laughs and Tobin can’t help but do a happy little dance as she makes her way to the sidelines, giving Crystal a high five when she offers. 

“Nice one,” Christen says softly. 

Maybe, Tobin thinks, she doesn’t have to apologize for anything after all. “Thanks,” she offers in return with a broad grin. 

Christen glances at it then looks away and Tobin knows she’s wrong. She knows that Christen is purposefully not looking at her. 

She has two missions now: the nutmeg challenge and to find out what’s going on with Christen. 

  
  


By the end of practice Tobin has nearly succeeded in one of her tasks. She has everyone checked off her list but Kelley. 

Kelley who looks far too smug about the fact that she has yet to be nutmegged.

Kelley who is keeping her legs awkwardly close together as she walks in tiny steps. 

Kelley who has teased practically everybody else about the fact that they’ve been nutmegged. 

“Told you that you wouldn’t get me,” Kelley says with a smirk. 

Tobin likes a challenge, but she’s not entirely sure how she’s going to overcome this one. 

She hasn’t figured out how to work out what’s going on with Christen, either. 

Tobin likes challenges, but she prefers ones that she thinks she has a chance at solving. 

“I’m pretty sure I have until the end of the day,” Tobin points out. 

“I’m pretty sure you only had until the end of practice,” Kelley shoots back. “And, oh look, practice is over.”

“We’re not at the locker rooms yet,” Sonny says. “She’s got time.”

“Yeah, in fact, I’m pretty sure it’s still kind of practice until we’re back on the bus,” Julie adds. 

Kelley makes a face and shakes her head. “No, it’s over.”

“Then why are you still walking like that?” Lindsey asks with a smirk of her own. 

Tobin can’t help but grin at the way that everyone is suddenly taking her side. 

“Like this? Oh, I always walk like this,” Kelley lies with a grin. 

Tobin hears a familiar giggle that makes her heart race just a little and then she hears a whispered, “Be ready,” Christen’s breath falling hotly in her ear and flooding her with warmth. 

“You always walk like that, huh?” Christen asks, speeding up just enough to fall into step with Kelley, and Tobin watches and Tobin follows with a ball at her feet. 

“Yep, always,” Kelley confirms. 

“It’s funny, because I’d think it would screw with your balance,” Christen replies, giving Kelley just enough of a nudge that she has to take a big step sideways. 

Tobin doesn’t wait for an invitation. She takes the opportunity, knowing it’ll be her only one. 

The team erupts in “Ooooohs!” and “She got you Kelleys” and laughter, but the only thing that Tobin hears is Christen’s giggle and the only thing she notices is the way that Christen throws her a little wink over her shoulder. 

Tobin’s head feels like it’s spinning from the mixed messages she’s getting today, but her heart doesn’t care as it races in response. 

Then, Kelley is shoving Christen back and she gives Tobin a shove for good measure and says, “Fine. Whatever. You win.”

“What exactly do I win?” Tobin asks, stopping short when she realizes that they hadn’t actually set terms for a victory. 

“Our undying respect,” Jess replies. 

“The pride in knowing you megged the whole USWNT?” Rose suggests. 

“Dinner,” Kelley declares. “Tonight. Dress nice and meet us in the lobby at 7.”

Tobin shrugs. She’ll take it. Besides Rose actually made a pretty good point. She can’t wait to gloat to Amy and Lauren. 

Her other task may have to wait for another day. 

  
  


Tobin double checks her phone when she only sees Christen through the glass doors of the lobby. She’s on time. Maybe everyone else is just running late. If any of them is the type to be prompt, it’s Christen. 

She feels suddenly nervous and she’s not entirely sure why except that the awkwardness with Christen from practice is still lingering in her mind. She tugs a little anxiously at the silky blue top she’d thrown on over a pair of black jeans. Amy had said it wasn’t dressy enough, but Lauren had pointed out that it was pretty dressy for Tobin, so she’d gone with it, but seeing Christen standing in the lobby with her hair down in loose waves and large hoop earrings in and a sleek black dress that shows off her ass and her legs...

Tobin’s mouth goes a little dry, and she swallows hard before steeling her nerve and heading inside. 

“Hey,” she greets quietly as if she’s scared of spooking Christen. 

Christen looks up from her phone in surprise. “Hey,” she greets in reply, and Tobin thinks she can see a hint of pink on her cheeks. 

“Where is everyone?” Tobin asks. 

“That is precisely what I just asked in the group text,” Christen replies, turning her attention back to her phone. 

Tobin watches as her expression turns first to confusion and then to annoyance. 

“Well, apparently everyone is flaking,” Christen sighs. “Rose says that Sammy fell asleep and Julie says she has a headache and Carli says her legs need a longer ice bath.”

Tobin raises an skeptical eyebrow. “And everyone else?”

Christen shrugs. “They’ve all got an excuse. I’m sorry.”

“Kelley?”

“Kelley was getting ready when I left the room and now she’s being annoying.”

Tobin notices the tinge of pink on Christen’s cheeks turning a little darker and she wonders what Kelley might have said. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. There’s no point in her hanging around if they’re not going to dinner. She needs to go home and figure out something to cook and she’s already hungry. She tells herself she’s not disappointed as she offers a half smile and says, “Well, I guess maybe we’ll do this tomorrow night instead? When everyone feels better?” 

Christen hesitates for a moment, then shakes her head. “No. That’s stupid. You’re already dressed up and you came all the way here. We should still go to dinner.” 

Tobin’s heart skips a beat. “You and me?” 

Christen swallows hard and Tobin’s eyes trace its path down her throat. 

“Yeah,” Christen replies. 

Tobin wants to say, “Okay.” She wants to walk out of there with Christen and crack jokes until Christen is giggling that adorable giggle of hers. She wants to figure out every way she can coax a smile onto those gorgeous lips. (She wants to do so much more, but she won’t let her mind stray there right now.)

She wants to, but she just can’t because Christen still won’t meet her eyes and she’s looking shy and a little uncomfortable, and Tobin needs to know how to make it better. She needs to know what she did. 

“So you’re not still mad at me?” she blurts. 

Christen looks at her then, her eyes wide and her mouth parted in surprise, and God she’s just so incredibly gorgeous. Tobin gets lost just looking at her for a moment before Christen manages to gasp, “What?” and Tobin remembers that she needs answers. 

“Earlier you wouldn’t really look at me and you haven’t talked to me much today, and I was trying to work out what I said last night that upset you because I feel like people should know what they’re apologizing for and...and suddenly I feel like I imagined everything because you’re looking at me like I have three heads,” Tobin finishes in a mumble, feeling her cheeks flush with heat. 

“I’m not mad at you!” Christen says. Her cheeks are definitely a few shades darker now, but her eyes are meeting Tobin’s at least, and when Tobin searches them she finds nothing but honesty. 

“You’re not?”

Christen shakes her head. “No. Sorry. I was...I was in my own head today. It- It wasn’t about you. I didn’t mean to make you think that.”

“Oh,” Tobin replies, feeling stupid for jumping to conclusions in the first place. 

“Let me buy you dinner,” Christen says. “You earned it, after all. You won the nutmeg challenge.”

Tobin feels some of the tension ease out of her shoulders and she grins a half grin. “I’m pretty sure I couldn’t have actually won it without your help, so how about we split the bill.”

Christen shakes her head. “No. I’ll pay. You ‘megged 22 of us all on your own. Besides,” she adds a little sheepishly, “I feel bad that you thought you’d done something wrong.” 

“No! Don’t feel bad. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. I just wanted to know how to fix it.”

“But you didn’t do anything.” 

Tobin looks at Christen for a long moment, their eyes locked, more apologies dying on the tips of their tongues, and then they’re both laughing. It’s a little awkward, but it’s kind of funny too and Tobin has to smile. 

“Okay, fine, but I’ll leave the tip.” 

“Deal,” Christen replies with a smile of her own. 

It’s not a date, Tobin tells herself as she offers Christen her arm. It’s definitely not a date because Christen is just being nice. She’s just a genuinely nice, good-hearted person. She’s not into her like that. Besides, Tobin will get over her stupid crush. She will. She has to. 

As Christen slides her hand into the crook of Tobin’s elbow and her whole body floods with warmth, Tobin’s not entirely sure how she’s going to manage it, though. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen and Tobin go on what is very definitely NOT a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. I haven't felt like writing fluff recently (apart from the super short thing about the UNC vs Stanford game), and I've been exploring some other pairings like Soran and So'Hara (check them out if you're interested ;)). (Also I have 3 kids so writing can be slow going.) Thanks for all the feedback. I'm glad everyone seems to be enjoying this so far! Hopefully you like this chapter, too! You know the drill, leave a comment if you like it please!   
xx

It’s not a date. This is not how dates happen, no matter what Kelley might think. Dates are not just group outings where nobody else shows up. For it to be a date, they would both have to  _ want _ it to be a date. They would have to communicate with each other about how it  _ is _ a date. 

This is not a date. 

This is dinner between two friends. 

Christen is going to give a few of her teammates a stern talking to when she gets back to the hotel. 

She might give herself a stern talking to, too. 

The look on Tobin’s face when she’d started rambling about Christen being mad at her and avoiding her had broken Christen’s heart. She hadn’t meant to make her sad. She hadn’t meant to hurt her. She just hadn’t been able to shake her dream. 

(She still can’t shake it. How can she when she’s been wet all day at the thought of Tobin’s hands on her, of Tobin’s mouth kissing her, of Tobin naked before her? How can she when every time she’s even been near Tobin today all she can think about is pinning her to a mattress and having her way with her, want coursing through her body?)

The problem is that she hasn’t dated in a while. Well, more specifically, that she hasn’t had sex in a while. And hotel living with teammates is not the most conducive lifestyle to taking care of certain needs. That’s all. That’s why she had that dream. That’s why she’s having trouble getting over that dream. 

“You okay?” Tobin asks. 

It’s not the first time since they got to dinner that she’s asked that, and it makes Christen feel even worse about the way she treated Tobin earlier. “Yeah. I’m fine!”

Tobin’s eyeing her curiously over her food and Christen has never wished she could read minds quite so much. Then again, it’s probably better she can’t. She doesn’t really want to hear how strange Tobin thinks she is. She doesn’t need it confirmed that her crush isn’t returned. She’d rather live with the sliver of hope even though she’ll never act on it. 

“What?” 

Tobin averts her eyes and shakes her head. There’s a slight blush on her cheeks and Christen can’t help thinking how damn cute she looks. 

“No, what?” Christen presses, feeling just a tiny bit bold. 

“You said before you were in your own head today. I was just wondering about what.” 

“Oh.” Just like that any bravery is gone and embarrassment flushes her cheeks. Just like that she can’t look straight at Tobin anymore. 

(Just like that she’s remembering a naked, wet Tobin beckoning for her to join her in the shower and her mouth goes dry.)

Christen sips at her water to buy herself a second to answer. 

“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me. It’s none of my business.” Tobin gives her an out before she can think one up. 

“No, it’s just...camp. Getting in my head. I’ve felt like my focus is off and the competition is so fierce, it’s like you can’t have an off day because someone else is right there having an on day, ready to start in your spot. Not that I start much anyway.” It’s amazing how fast the lie flows once she starts it. Maybe that’s because it’s not a complete lie. Every word she’s said is true, but she doesn’t usually talk about the pressures of the game. She thinks them through, she breathes them out in her mindful meditation, and then she carries on with a smile. She doesn’t complain because complaining doesn’t get her anywhere. It feels weird that it’s all spilling out here with Tobin. 

“Yeah, I can’t even imagine how intense it must be. I mean I know you’re all friends, but then seeing you at training, you’re all working so hard. You’re so talented, every one of you. It’s like you’re competing against each other and rooting for each other all in the same breath. It has to feel like so much.”

Christen nods. “I love them. All of them, but there’s a part of me that’s selfish, too. I want the starts. I want the minutes. I want to be the one putting the balls in the back of the net. And I love when I can assist a teammate and they score and we go up in a game. I love celebrating with them and for them. I love that feeling of being a part of something bigger than myself.” 

“But-” Tobin supplies with a kind grin. 

Christen smiles in return and bites her lip before she says, “But I love it even more when I’m the one that scored.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s a normal, natural feeling,” Tobin assures her. “If you didn’t have that competitive drive, you wouldn’t have gotten to this level. I don’t think that’s something you should feel guilty about.”

Christen shrugs noncommittally. 

“In fact, I’d bet money that every other player, or at least every other forward and midfielder feels that way.”

“Maybe,” Christen concedes. “And some defenders. Sonny and Kel. I don’t know how Kelley made the transfer to defense so well. I mean I do, I saw it happen, but like...Sometimes I just miss our college dream team days.”

“Didn’t she give you the assist on your world cup goal?”

Christen nods and smiles. “Yeah. That felt right.”

“So why do you think you’ve been in your head about this recently? Like why has it been getting to you today?” Tobin probes, and Christen remembers that she’d been lying. 

Or, well, not  _ lying _ , exactly, just diverting from the truth at hand. “I’ve just felt...distracted.” 

That’s not a lie either. 

“By what?” Tobin asks, her eyebrows raised in genuine curiosity. 

Christen had hoped she wouldn’t ask. She feels the flush returning to her cheeks and she knows she’s blushing. Images from her dream flash through her mind unbidden. “I, uh, well, I mean, nothing really specific…” This is why she hadn’t told an outright lie the first time around. She’s not good at lying. 

“Is it weird having a photographer around? I’m not trying to make you feel even more judged in camp. I swear, I’m just impressed by all of you.”

“Well, you’ve impressed us, too. You’ve got real skills,” Christen replies, eager to turn the conversation away from her. “You never thought about going pro?”

Tobin shrugs. “I don’t think I’m  _ that _ good.”

“You’ve practiced with the National Team. I dunno if you know this, but someone kinda smart said that we’re all really talented and impressive,” Christen teases. 

Tobin grins. “Yeah, but that was just a bit of scrimmaging.”

“That you’ve done WELL at,” Christen points out. “Plus you won the nutmeg challenge.”

“Because you helped me,” Tobin replies with a smile. “Besides, I love photography. Like, I walk around the world and I see the photos framed. Like...like right now, you in this restaurant, the candlelight flickering on your face in the warm glow, especially when you turn your face to the right like with your smile, the shadows and the light and the way it makes your eyes glow and the way it accentuates your curls. It’d be such a good picture.” Tobin fades out and then looks away, blushing lightly again, as if she hadn’t meant to get quite so into her description of how she thinks about a picture. 

Christen finds it fascinating, though (and the fact that Tobin is looking at her like she’s something beautiful maybe makes her heart beat a little faster in her chest). “That’s so cool. Seeing the world with such an artistic eye...You must find beauty everywhere.”

Tobin smiles, but doesn’t make eye contact. “I try to,” she replies with a small shrug. “Sometimes it’s easier than others.” She glances up at Christen and Christen feels her heart skip a beat. 

It doesn’t mean anything. It’s a coincidence. Tobin isn’t trying to tell her anything with the look. She was just being polite, trying to make some eye contact in their conversation. 

That doesn’t stop Christen from having to swallow down the sudden lump in her throat. 

“So, um, sorry, again, that everyone else bailed.” 

Tobin smiles at her. “It’s fine. We’ll just have to rub it in their faces tomorrow that I got to hang out with the coolest player on the team.”

Christen laughs. It’s a joke. She should laugh. Tobin doesn’t mean anything by it. “Yeah, be sure to tell Kelley that. I can’t wait to see the look on her face.”

Tobin chuckles in response, her eyes dancing in the candlelight, and Christen feels warmth flood through her at the sound. It’s such an inviting sound. Christen could listen to Tobin laugh all day. 

The thought stops her in her tracks.

This crush is getting out of hand. She really needs to get a handle on it and rein it in. She cannot fall for the photographer for all of the reasons she’s been telling herself since she first laid eyes on Tobin, all cute and hot and professional behind her camera, putting people at ease, offering that easy-going smile she has, flexing her arms as she adjusted lights and lined up shots. 

Christen closes her eyes and tries not to think about how quickly she’d let her attraction overwhelm her. She tries not to think about how Tobin has ACTUALLY seen her COMPLETELY naked. She tries not to think about the way Tobin 100% saw her nipple when she did a bad job of covering it up and then how quickly she had hurried to cover it for her. She tries not to think about how Tobin took her picture with the same calm eye that she’d taken everyone else’s. She tries not to let her heart sink at the idea that Tobin sees her the same as she sees the rest of the team: as a job. Maybe as a friend. 

“You getting lost in your head again?” Tobin asks. 

Christen’s eyes snap open. “What? No. Sorry. Just...tired,” she lies. She’s not really a fan of lying, but she is a fan of self-preservation, and that’s what this is. 

“We don’t have to get dessert,” Tobin says. 

“No! We do. You do. Dawn would kill me for it. But you should,” Christen encourages. She may be dealing with some conflicting thoughts, but she’s not ready for this night to end. She’s not ready to say goodnight to Tobin. 

(That in itself is a problem that she’s going to have to deal with at some point. Probably. Maybe.)

“I’m not getting dessert by myself,” Tobin counters. “How about we share something?” 

Christen smiles. She tells herself there’s not a flutter in her chest at the idea. “Yeah. Okay. I’d like that.”

  
  


Christen tells Tobin that she doesn’t have to drop her back at the hotel. She can just Uber back. It’s not a big deal. But Tobin insists. 

Tobin, who is just genuinely one of the nicest people she’s ever met. 

It’s not helping her not fall for her. 

She should put some distance between them. She needs to regroup. 

And yet…

She can’t take the sad look on Tobin’s face that she caused earlier. And if she actively avoids her, she’s sure to notice. 

So she won’t. She’ll suck it up. It’s just for another week and a few days, and then Christen will get back to her normal life that exists in places that are not Portland. She’ll get plenty of space then, and her crush will fade, and everything will be fine. 

“Thanks, again, for driving me back here,” Christen mumbles as they pull up in front of the hotel. 

Tobin shoots her a wide smile. “It’s no problem. I like driving.”

Christen nods. She should get out. She’ll make it awkward if she doesn’t. 

“Sorry again about the rest of the team.”

“You honestly don’t have to keep apologizing for them,” Tobin assures her. “Anyway, I had fun.”

There’s a tension that’s been sitting on her chest all night, and it presses in a little tighter at Tobin’s words. “Yeah? I didn’t bore you with my rambling about soccer stresses?”

Tobin shakes her head. “Not one bit. Besides, you’re cute when you ramble.” She turns away quickly and looks out the windshield, and Christen knows that she’s waiting for her to get out and leave already so that she can get home and get to bed. 

“Well, goodnight,” she says. And then her body, acting without express permission from her brain, leans over and places a kiss on Tobin’s cheek. She freezes in place when she realizes what she’s doing. Tobin’s skin is warm beneath her lips and she smells so good, like warm vanilla and fresh laundry, and fuck, fuck, fuck, because now she’s lingering in a kiss she shouldn’t have done in the first place. 

Tobin moves a little, pulling back just a touch and turning her head, and then her eyes are right there, dark and surprised, but she manages an awkward smile and, obviously just to make Christen feel less weird about what just happened, places a quick, chaste kiss on Christen’s cheek in return. “Goodnight,” Tobin murmurs, breath hot against her cheek, and smelling like the mints they’d grabbed from the bowl on the way out of the restaurant. 

It wouldn’t take much. She’d just have to press forward a little bit, just lean in a bit more, really. It would be so very easy to kiss Tobin right now. Properly. 

She gives herself a mental kick. She’s made a big enough fool of herself tonight already. She pulls away before she can do something else she regrets. 

“See you tomorrow,” she says with what she hopes looks like a genuine smile and hops out of the car. 

She doesn’t turn around. She doesn’t glance over her shoulder. She heads straight inside and goes right to the elevators and up to her room and she marches in, not caring if Kelley is asleep. 

Kelley’s not, of course. She’s grinning like the Cheshire cat. “Hey, Pressy. How was your date?”

Christen moves to her bed, picks up her pillow, and throws it at Kelley. Hard. “It wasn’t a date!”

“Private dinner...Just the two of you? Sounds like a date to me. Did it end in a kiss?”

“Not the type  _ you _ mean!” 

Kelley sits up a little straighter. “Wait, does that mean there  _ was _ a kiss?”

“On the cheek, Kelley. A kiss on the cheek. It was nothing exciting and it was honestly a little embarrassing and I didn’t mean to, and you could tell I weirded her out, and-”

“YOU kissed HER? Nice, move, Pressy.”

“KELLEY!” Christen flops down on her bed and throws her arm over her face. She can’t believe how badly Kelley is missing the point. 

Well, actually, she kind of can. 

“It wasn’t like that, and you know it,” Christen sighs. 

“Bet she wanted it to be.”

“Bet she didn’t,” Christen counters. She was there. She’d have noticed. 

“Chris, I love you, but would it hurt you to flirt just a little?”

“Yes. Yes it would,” Christen replies and Kelley sighs. 

“We were just trying to help,” Kelley mutters. 

“I don’t need your help. I don’t need a date. I’m fine, Kel.”

“If you say so,” Kelley replies, and Christen knows this isn’t over. She knows Kelley isn’t convinced. 

She just wishes she could convince herself that what she’s saying is true.

  
  


“Kelley, where are we going?” Christen demands.

She knows it won’t yield any better results than the previous three times she’s asked, but she’d really like to know. 

“You’ll see when we get there,” Kelley repeats her mantra. 

Christen pokes Sonny in the side. “Tell me,” she demands. 

Sonny glances at Kelley then back at Christen and shakes her head. “We’re almost there,” Sonny replies instead. 

When Kelley had said that they were going on an adventure and dangled the keys to the van in front of her, Christen had assumed that she would get to know what that adventure was. Apparently, she was wrong. And now, here she was, crammed in the middle row of seats between Sonny and Allie and wishing she’d stayed back at the hotel. 

“You know rest days are supposed to be restful, not stressful,” she tries again. 

“This isn’t stressful. It’s fun,” Alex informs her from the front passenger seat with a sly grin that does not put her at ease at all. 

The GPS on Kelley’s phone informs her to take a right, and Christen tries to peek at it, but Alex blocks her view. 

It’s just before the GPS blares, “In 500 feet your destination will be on the right.” that Christen notices the park. More importantly, she notices the small sets of bleachers, the groups of people lining what are clearly the sides of a soccer field, and, more importantly, the players running around. 

“You’re taking me to play soccer on our rest day?”

“No,” Kelley corrects. 

“We’re taking you to WATCH soccer on our rest day,” Ash supplies from the back seat. 

Christen has a sneaking suspicion as to why before they’re even out of the car, before she catches sight of a familiar lanky form jogging to the sidelines. 

“We’re gonna get recognized,” she complains, feeling a lump rise unexpectedly in her throat. Normally she doesn’t mind fan interactions, but, well- “We’re going to spoil her game!”

“Shhh. We’ll be fine,” Kelley replies, waving her protests away. She leads the charge of their small group. 

Their small group that includes some of the most recognizable faces in women’s soccer, Christen reminds herself. Kelley heads to the already half-full bleachers and claims the top row for them, a few people willingly moving out of the way when they see exactly who is requesting that they shift, their eyes wide, jaws hanging open. 

News travels quickly from there, but Christen tries not to notice the hushed whispers and the furtive glances in their direction. 

Instead, she focuses on the players getting ready to start their game. Tobin is on the sidelines, arm in arm with two other women. She looks good in her blue and white kit, all toned legs and tanned skin. Christen tries not to notice. She stifles a giggle as Tobin and the other two women jump over the line onto the pitch before breaking apart and heading to their positions. 

She ignores the slight pang in her chest that feels almost like jealousy at the way these women clearly get to know Tobin in a way that she never will. 

The whistle blows, and the blonde who had been arm in arm with Tobin a minute before kicks the ball. Christen doesn’t focus on her for long though.

Her attention is easily captured by Tobin. Tobin who is focussed on the ball. Tobin who runs up and down the field in long strides with good bursts of speed. Tobin who dribbles around two defenders when others might have looked to pass. Tobin who keeps a ball barely in bounds with a clever touch. Tobin who nutmegs a defender with a sneaky cross to the brunette with loose curls dangling from her ponytail. Tobin who cheers and runs to hug the brunette when she puts it in the back of the net a moment later. Tobin who has an assist in the first ten minutes of the game. 

(Tobin whose focus and skill is one of the sexiest things she’s ever seen in her life.)

Tobin gets flanked by the blonde, too, and then other teammates pile on for a quick celebration and then-

And then Kelley is on her feet beside her, cheering loudly, hollering, “Whooo! Nice assist, Tobito!” and people are turning to look. 

TOBIN is turning to look, her eyes wide and her focus from minutes before vanished. Her eyes lock on Christen and she looks surprised and confused and thrown. 

Christen curses Kelley under her breath. They shouldn’t have come. This was a mistake. They’re going to ruin her whole game. 

  
  



	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin plays her game and then her new fans descend upon her (but she only has eyes for one of them.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quickish, but short update. Thanks so much for all the amazing feedback! So glad everyone is liking this! Enjoy! xx

“Did your girl bring like half her team to come watch our game?” Amy asks, slinging an arm around Tobin’s shoulder and pointing not remotely subtly at the stands.

Tobin shrugs off her arm, but can’t take her eyes off of Christen. How can she look so good in a simple grey crop top and high-waisted jeans? “She’s not my girl.”

“Really? How come she’s looking straight at you?” Amy points out. 

Tobin shakes her head and breaks the eye contact, feeling a blush spreading across her cheeks. She fights it, doing a few jumps to psych herself back into the game and have a more reasonable excuse for the color on her face. “She’s looking at us,” Tobin gestures between Lauren and Amy and herself as they head back up the field to line up, “because we just scored.”

“Uh-huh,” Lauren says in a completely unconvinced tone of voice. 

“I told you guys, I tried flirting the other night when it was just the two of us and...nothing. She’s not interested.” Tobin shrugs like it’s no big deal and gets in position. She risks one more quick glance at the stands and sees Christen talking to Kelley. Suddenly there’s so much more pressure to do well, this game. She needs to focus. 

Then again, Tobin has always thrived on a bit of competition. 

The whistle blows and Tobin charges forward, stealing the ball. She does a quick pass to Amy, able to find her without really looking after years of playing together, and then pushes up the field. Amy gets slide tackled by a Portland Pride defender, and it occurs to Tobin that maybe she’s not the only one who’s interested in showing off in front of members of the USWNT, though probably not for the same reasons. 

She chases the defender down, but she passes before she can reach her. Lesley intercepts the pass and dribbles up the field, crossing to Lauren, and Tobin is racing back towards goal, ready at the far post when Lauren crosses. The Portland Pride keeper is good, though, and she gets a hand on the ball, but she isn’t able to grab it and it bounces back to Tobin’s feet. She does a quick flick back into the goal, knowing exactly where each post is, not needing to look. She hears the groan from the keeper. She hears Lauren’s triumphant yell a second before she slams into her for a hug, feels Amy jump onto her back, but Tobin looks one place. 

In the stands, Kelley, Sonny, Ash, Ali, Alex, Allie, Lindsey, and Christen are all on their feet, arms in the air. Christen is clapping above her head. 

Tobin can’t help herself. She points at her and grins. 

It’s stupid. It’s as good as an admission of attraction. She doesn’t even care, though, because a moment later Christen cups her hands around her mouth and whoops, the sound carrying over the other cheers. 

Tobin jogs back to centerfield. She’s only getting started. 

  
  


They win by their largest margin ever. 6-1. Tobin scores a hat trick and Lauren gets a brace with Amy scoring the last goal in the 89th minute. 

The whole team rushes Amy and Tobin as soon as the final whistle blows, cheering and celebrating their win. It’s silly. It’s not even to get them into a playoff spot for their league. It’s just a normal game, and yet Tobin feels like she’s on top of the world. 

That feeling intensifies as the members of the USWNT make their way down the bleachers and head straight for her. There’s a crowd following them, clearly hoping for autographs or the like, but Kelley is shouting, “TOBITO YOU STAR!”, and Ash is saying, “Daaaammmn giiiiirl!”, and Sonny is doing an impromptu celebratory dance, and Christen…

Christen’s smile could outshine the sun. “You were AMAZING!” Christen gushes and then Tobin’s being swept up into a hug, and Christen is warm and soft and, GOD, she smells so good. Tobin lets herself, just for a moment, pretend that her feelings for Christen are returned as she buries her face in Christen’s shoulder and breathes her in. She allows herself to squeeze a little tighter as Christen holds firmly onto her waist. She’s known her a week and already she finds herself not wanting to let go. 

This crush has gotten out of hand. 

She’s pulled back to reality by a few familiar voices shouting, “Auntie Toto!”

She lets go of Christen and turns to greet Jrue, Luke, and Ryan. Jrue jumps into her arms and Luke tackles her legs, while Ryan grips onto his mom’s arm and eyes the people he doesn’t know shyly. 

“Hey, kiddos! Did Auntie Toto have a good game, or what?” 

“Mama scored!” Jrue exclaims delightedly in her arms. 

“That’s right! Mama DID score! Twice!” Tobin replies with matched excitement, glancing over her shoulder at Lauren, who was talking animatedly with Alex. 

Jrue grins up at her, and Luke tugs at her leg and says, “MY mama scored too.”

“You bet, bud,” Tobin confirms, reaching out a hand to ruffle his hair. Tobin glances at Amy and realizes she’s deep in conversation with Kelley. That is apt to lead to nothing good. 

Jrue pokes her in the nose, and Tobin refocuses on the little girl in her arms. Jrue points at Christen. 

“Is that Kissten Pess?”

Tobin grins. “Yeah. It is.”

Jrue’s eyes go wide as she looked from Christen back to Tobin. “She’s my fav-it.”

Tobin’s eyes met Christen’s over Jrue’s curls, and sees the way she touches her hand to her heart, sees the way she melts at Jrue’s words. 

“You wanna meet her?” Tobin asks. 

Jrue nods solemnly, and Tobin repositions her in her arms. “Christen, this is my buddy Jrue. Jrue, this is my friend Christen.”

“Hi, Jrue. It’s very nice to meet you,” Christen says, extending her hand and shaking Jrue’s very properly. 

“Hi,” Jrue murmurs, leaning in a little closer to Tobin. 

“Do you like soccer?” Christen asks. 

Jrue nods again. “Mama plays.”

“Yes, she does,” Christen agrees. “She’s very good.”

Jrue grins, then she reaches out for Christen, and Tobin moves in a little closer to facilitate whatever she’s doing. Jrue touches Christen’s hair with a tentative hand, and says, “You have curls like me.”

If Tobin could have melted into the ground, Christen’s look at that comment from Jrue would have made her do it. 

“Yeah, I do,” Christen replies, her voice cracking with emotion. “And your curls are BEAUTIFUL.” 

Jrue beams at her and Tobin has to keep herself from audibly “awwing” at the entire exchange. She’s distracted a moment later by a cry of, “No! You stole it right from my feet!” 

When she looks over, she sees Sonny acting overly distressed and Ryan with a soccer ball at his feet grinning broadly. 

“Haha! Can’t get it back!” he teases her, and she makes a dramatic lunge that Ryan easily dodges. 

Lindsey hops over next to him and starts hollering, “Over here! Pass it here!” 

Tobin has to laugh. “You okay if I put you down, munchkin?” 

Jrue nods, eyes still fixed on Christen (and really, Tobin can’t blame her). She sets her down carefully, looks down at Luke, who’s still holding on to her leg, and says, “Wanna go help Sonny play against your brother?”

Luke grins, delighted at the idea, and nods. Together they run over and Tobin steals the ball from Lindsey. 

“Luke, get open!” she calls.

Luke takes approximately one step away from her, but it’s enough, so she kicks the ball straight to his feet. 

“I got it!” he declares excitedly. 

“Go to goal!” Lindsey calls. 

Before Tobin can suggest to Sonny to go hop in goal, Ash is there challenging, “Think you can score on me, dude?” 

“Yeah!” Luke shouts, at the same time Ryan, in true big brother fashion says, “No way!” 

“Run, Luke!” Tobin encourages. 

Luke does so, kicking the ball ahead of him. 

“Ryan, steal the ball!” Sonny urges.

Ryan runs at his brother, but Tobin intercepts, picking him up and flying him around the side of Luke as Luke approaches the goal. 

Ryan squirms in her grasp, laughing as he protests, “That’s cheating Auntie Toto!”

Tobin throws him over her shoulder and runs alongside Luke. “What? What cheating? I don’t see any cheating!”

Ryan laughs harder, tapping on her back. “You can’t pick someone up in soccer!”

“That’s not true,” Lindsey counters. “We do it all the time in celebration!” 

“Put me down!” Ryan protests as Luke squares up against Ash, who’s making a good show of being ready to defend the goal. 

Tobin takes a few steps away from Luke and does as Ryan requested. 

Ryan immediately takes off towards his brother, but it’s too late because Luke swings back his leg and kicks hard. 

Ash dives the wrong way on purpose, but it looks real enough to Luke because he’s jumping up and down triumphantly as Ryan slows to a stop and pouts. 

“She let you score,” he tells Luke. 

“No way. You rocked it, Luke!” Tobin declares, high-fiving Luke. 

“Hey, Ryan, wanna see if you can score on her too,” Sonny asks, retrieving the ball and kicking it to him. 

Ryan lights up at that idea, and Ash protests from goal, “Aww, come on! I thought you two were on my team!”

“We’re our own team, right Ryan?” Sonny declares. 

“Right!” Ryan agrees. 

Luke starts charging at Ryan and Tobin can see what he’s planning, so she scoops him up, this time, flying him off to the sides towards his mom before collapsing to the ground dramatically, letting him flop, giggling, to the ground beside her. “Oof! When did you get so heavy, kid?” 

Luke stands up and flexes his arm muscles. “It’s cause I’m growing big and strong, Auntie Toto!” 

“You sure are, bud,” she agrees. “You think you’re strong enough to help me up?” she asks, holding out her hand, as the cheers from Ryan scoring on Ash greet her ears. 

Luke nods and takes Tobin’s hand. Tobin makes a show out of him pulling her up, even though she mostly has to support her own weight as she stands. 

“Wow! So strong, dude! Thanks!”

“Welcome!” he beams at her. 

Tobin glances around, noting Kelley and Alex signing autographs. Allie has joined in the impromptu soccer game behind her, and Amy is already encouraging Luke to get back to it. 

And Christen-

Christen is holding Jrue in her arms, looking like a natural. The little girl who owns such a large part of Tobin’s heart and the woman who is worming her way in there despite Tobin’s best efforts. It takes her breath away, just for a second. Christen is talking to Lauren, her easy-going nature evident as both of them look completely relaxed, and Jrue is interrupting every now and then. Every time Christen addresses Jrue, her eyes light up, and Tobin thinks it’s the most beautiful she’s ever seen her look, and that’s actually a pretty good accomplishment. 

“So those heart eyes for sure go both ways, then,” Amy comments, coming up beside her. 

“Huh?” Tobin asks, tearing her eyes away from Christen to frown at her best friend. 

“I mean you are so fucking smitten,” Amy says. 

Tobin looks around quickly, but the only one who is even possibly close enough to have overheard is Ali, and she looks pretty involved in watching Ash play soccer with the kids. Still, Tobin shoots Amy a glare and hisses, “I am not!”

It’s a blatant lie, and really, she should know better than to try lying to Amy at this point in their friendship. Amy gives her a pointed look, and Tobin sighs. 

“It’s a tiny crush,” Tobin says. 

Amy just keeps looking at her. 

“Fine, it’s a big crush. It doesn’t matter. She’s not interested.”

Amy glances over Tobin’s shoulder at Christen and raises her eyebrows. “You sure about that?” 

Tobin looks, too, and Christen is looking over the top of Jrue’s head at her. She smiles shyly and offers a little wave before turning her attention back to Lauren. 

“You should’ve seen her watching you playing with Luke and Ry.”

“She was watching?” Tobin asks. 

“She could barely keep her eyes off you even though she was talking to Lauren,” Amy replies. 

Tobin feels a flicker of hope. It’s just a small flicker. It doesn’t really prove anything. And Christen really hadn’t been responsive to any of her attempts at flirting the other night. Besides, Christen would be leaving town in another week and Tobin would be...well, here: playing club level soccer, taking photos of newborns and engaged couples and weddings if she was lucky. It’s not worth it to make a move. 

Right?

“Doesn’t matter,” Tobin mumbles. 

“Why not?” Amy demands. 

“Because she’s a pro soccer player and I’m just a photographer.”

“An amazing photographer who has been photographing pro soccer players all week,” Amy argues. 

“It’s just a job, Amy. A Portland-based job. Where does she play?”

“Um...Everywhere?” Amy suggests.

Tobin rolls her eyes. “Yeah, but she’s based in Salt Lake City.”

“Okay, but she travels all the time. I’m just saying long-distance can work.”

“IF she was even interested-”

“Which she is.”

“IF she is, then there’s still only one week left before she leaves town and we haven’t even gone on one date yet. And I have to photograph the team all day and then I still have to edit shots sometime-”

“You’re awfully full of excuses and awfully short on time, and yet, here she is, at our game, watching you AGAIN.” 

Tobin glances over her shoulder again, and Christen’s eyes are indeed back on her as she hands Jrue over to Lauren. 

“So?” Tobin asks stubbornly. 

Amy gives her a shove towards Christen. “So go talk to her, you idiot.”

Before Tobin can respond, Amy is walking away to Lauren. 

Tobin watches as a fan catches Christen’s attention and asks for an autograph and a picture. Christen obliges with an easy smile and the young woman practically skips away, giddiness radiating off of her. 

Tobin walks over slowly. “I’m pretty sure you made that girl’s year.”

Christen laughs. “She was sweet.”

“You’re good with fans,” Tobin compliments her. “And kids,” she adds, glancing to where Jrue is now joining in with the impromptu soccer game. 

Christen shrugs. “The fans are great, and Jrue is a cutie.”

“And you’re pretty great, too,” Tobin says. She doesn’t mean to just blurt it out like that, but she can’t take it back without sounding like an asshole, so she just swallows hard and looks away, hoping that the blush she feels on her cheeks isn’t as obvious as she thinks it is. 

Christen clears her throat, and murmurs, “You’re pretty great, too.” 

Tobin looks at her in surprise. 

“I mean, at photography,” Christen fumbles, but Christen still hasn’t even seen any of her recent pictures, and Tobin feels that slight glimmer of hope again. 

Is it possible that Amy and Lauren and even Kelley are onto something? It seems so improbable, and yet, now that she’s looking for it, Tobin can see the hint of a faint blush on Christen’s cheeks. 

“And soccer. You really had an amazing game.”

Tobin grins. “Thanks. I might have been showing off, just a little.”

“Because we were here? You know we don’t get to decide who makes the team,” Christen jokes. 

“Because you were here,” Tobin replies, hoping that Christen will understand that she means just her and not the rest of them. 

If she does, she doesn’t say anything about it. Instead she turns her gaze to the soccer game, which Ali, Kelley, and Alex have all joined in on now too.

“Those kids have no idea they’re playing with the best soccer players in the world,” Tobin marvels. “Minus one,” she adds, elbowing Christen in the side gently. 

Christen chuckles. “I don’t know about that, but I do love the freedom they have. I miss that sometimes. I still love the game, but it carries a weight now that it never did when I was their age.”

“Well, maybe you’re just not playing in the right games,” Tobin says. She reaches out and takes Christen’s hand and leads her towards the field with a grin. “Come on,” she invites, “bet you can’t get past me and Jrue!”

She ignores the way her heart beats a little faster when Christen giggles. She ignores the way that Christen’s hand feels like it fits so nicely into hers even if it’s just for a few brief moments. She ignores the looks that Kelley and Lauren give them when they join in and Tobin drops Christen’s hand. 

She’s having trouble ignoring the way she feels about Christen, though, and Amy’s words ring in her ears. She’s short on time. 

Does she dare make a move?

  
  



	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen tries to fight the way she feels, but it's getting harder and harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So so sorry for the really long wait. It's not even a super long chapter to make up for it. The holidays have been busy and then my entire family got the flu and I'm still coughing up a lung (I know, I know, flu shot - bit late now). This may not be up to par, but I hope you like it anyway. Thank you so much for all the kind feedback. Every time I get a comment for this I smile.   
Enjoy!  
xx

“You doing all right, Pressy?” Kelley asks. She’d handed over the keys to Ash so that she could sit next to Christen and tease her, Christen is sure. 

“I’m fine, Kel.”

“It’s just, I swear I saw you melt into a puddle back there.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Christen replies. 

“I do. You watching Tobin play with the kids. I’ve never seen bigger heart eyes!” Lindsey declares and Christen shoots her a glare. 

“It was cute. Those kids are adorable. Jrue is gonna be a star someday,” Christen defends herself. 

“Of course, Tobin could barely take her eyes off of you and the kids, too,” Sonny says. 

“Kid has a point,” Kelley agrees. 

Christen feels her cheeks flush. She hadn’t been oblivious to the way that Tobin’s eyes had seemed to find her quite a lot. It would have been hard to be oblivious to it when she was looking at Tobin so much. 

And then there was the way that Tobin had pointed to her when she’d scored. Okay, maybe it was to the whole team, but it had felt like Tobin had been pointing just at her, and, well-

It had DONE things to her heart. 

All of the teasing, all of the shoving by her teammates in Tobin’s direction...Was it possible that they just saw what she’d been too blind to? Could Tobin actually like her back?

Did it change anything if she did?

No. Tobin’s life was based in Portland and Christen’s wasn’t. Maybe if she played for the Thorns it would be worth trying for something, but she doesn’t. 

No. She would be Tobin’s friend and nothing more, whatever her treacherous heart seemed to want. 

“She was watching all of us with the kids,” Christen replies. 

Kelley just gives her a look. It’s a look she’s given her a few times over the years, and Christen knows exactly what it means. 

“You’ve all been on this Tobin has a crush kick since she took our pictures, and you really need to stop,” Christen continues despite the look. 

“You have a crush, though,” Ash calls from the front. 

“I do not!” Christen protests. 

“Sure. Okay,” Allie replies, sarcasm dripping from her voice. 

“I...Appreciate her beauty. And her genuine sweetness. And her soccer skills.”

“And her calves. And her ass. And her arm muscles. And her adorkable goofiness,” Kelley supplies. 

“Sorry, which of us supposedly has a crush on her?” Christen demands. 

“That’s a good question,” Alex says, leaning forward from the row behind them and looking pointedly at Kelley. 

Kelley just shrugs. “I have eyes. And I know Pressy’s type.”

Alex harrumphs and sits back with her arms crossed and Christen can already tell that she’s going to have to vacate her room later to let Kelley make it up to her. 

“I just wish you’d all lay off. We’re people. We’re not dolls you can write the narrative for!”

The van falls silent, and Christen knows that maybe she’s being a little harsh, but it’s not like life and romance is easy for her. Her teammates should understand. They live the life, too. 

“We just don’t want you to turn down a chance to be happy,” Kelley says soothingly, nudging Christen’s arm with her shoulder. 

Christen sighs. 

“I think about what if I was too scared to admit my feelings for Ali. Then I wouldn’t be marrying her,” Ash supplies from the front seat a moment later. 

“And I’ve never seen a connection like you and Tobin have unfold in real time,” Sonny offers. “Not teasing. Just genuinely, you two have chemistry, whether you see it or not.”

Lindsey hums her agreement. 

Christen frowns. “It’s just too complicated.”

“Life always is,” Kelley replies. “You can always find an excuse. It’s taking a leap of faith that’s hard.”

“Like when you went to Sweden. Did you know that’d work out okay?” Ali asks. 

“Well, no, but it was a new adventure, and it was exciting.”

“What do you think falling in love is?” Kelley points out. 

Christen coughs and feels a blush burning its way up her cheeks. “I’ve known her for like a week. I don’t think ‘falling in love’ is really what’s going on here.”

Kelley sighs and rolls her eyes. “Fine, whatever. What do you think starting a relationship is like? It’s a new adventure and it’s exciting, but you have to just go for it.”

“So, what? I ask her out and assuming that you’re not all seeing things, she says yes, and then...What? We date for a week and then I go back to Utah and see her like once every few months when we happen to have a game in Portland? Sounds like an amazing relationship.”

“Long distance can work. Remember when Ash was in Orlando already and I was still in DC?”

“Al and I make it work between Salt Lake and Orlando,” Kelley adds. 

“Yeah, and you regularly bitch to me about how much it sucks and how you’d love to get laid more often, and one of you is flying to see the other every chance you get,” Christen counters. 

“Getting laid sometimes is better than getting laid never,” Kelley shoots back. 

“Yeah, but you all had years to get to know each other before you even made a move. Kel, don’t think I’ve forgotten your pining days.”

Kelley sits up a little straighter. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Christen,” she replies. 

“I do,” Alex offers with a wicked grin. 

“Whose side are you on?” Kelley demands. 

“I dunno. How much have you been checking out Tobin’s ass?” Alex retorts. 

“It’s got nothing on yours, babe,” Kelley offers with an endearing grin. 

Christen has to laugh. “See? You guys get THESE moments. And here I am, squeezed in between my annoying best friends.”

“You heard her call me one of her best friends, right?” Allie asks. “Everyone heard that? I’m claiming it. Christen Press’s best friend. I’ll put it in my twitter bio.”

Christen rolls her eyes and laughs. “Thought we all had 22 best friends,” she teases. 

“Well, yeah, but I mean, clearly I’m a better best friend,” Allie replies. 

“Whatever makes you happy, Allie,” Kelley says, reaching over Christen to pat Allie on the head. “But seriously, Chris, time can be made, but only if you give it a chance. We’re more than just soccer. We’re more than our jobs.”

“I know that! Obviously, I do, but...Look, whatever you think is happening here, it’s just not, okay? It’s just not.” The words sound forceful, but they don’t ring as true as she’d like in her ears. 

She doesn’t miss the looks exchanged over top of her, but she does ignore them.

Kelley sighs beside her and presses a kiss to her temple, but doesn’t push it further. 

_ There’s nothing there _ , she tells herself, and she doesn’t even believe it. 

  
  
  


Christen can’t help the way she’s looking forward to seeing Tobin again by the time practice comes around. She’s not even lying to herself well anymore. Her body won’t let her. Not when her heart beats a little faster the moment she sees Tobin. Not with the way a smile breaks across her face as soon as Tobin gives her a grin and a wave. Not when she has an actual skip in her step as she goes to greet her properly. 

She goes in for a hug without thinking about it until Tobin’s warm arms are wrapped around her and she’s breathing in Tobin’s shampoo, face buried in her Tobin’s hair. Her eyes flutter closed and when she opens them again she sees Kelley giving her a knowing look over Tobin’s shoulder. 

Christen braces for the teasing, but it doesn’t come. Actually, nobody has teased her all morning, and it’s more than a little disconcerting after the days on end of it. Maybe she finally got through to them. It’s a shame it coincides with her no longer getting through to herself. 

Falling for Tobin is a bad idea. 

And yet, she leans in as Tobin talks animatedly about how fun it had been the day before after her game. 

“Jrue wanted me to make sure I said hi from her, by the way,” Tobin says. “I think she’s smitten.” 

“Aww, well she’s not the only one,” Christen replies. 

Tobin’s eyes are bright and questioning as they meet hers, and Christen can feel the blush spreading up her cheeks at what it sounds like she’s implied. 

“I mean, I’m smitten with her, too.” 

Tobin nods, but her eyes stay locked on Christen’s and suddenly the air on the field feels stuffy. 

Christen gulps a deep breath. “I mean, she’s such a cutie. So sweet. And the way she kicked that ball right through Kelley’s legs? I mean I might be her biggest fan.” 

Tobin chuckles and the sound floods Christen with warmth. “I think you’re gonna have to get in line.”

“Oh yeah?” Christen asks, raising an eyebrow. She’s not flirting, she tells herself as Tobin leans in a little closer. She isn’t. She’s teasing. It’s different. 

“Yep. I’ve been her biggest fan from the day she was born, so…” 

“Oooh, pulling the ‘I’ve known her since she was born’ card. Bold.”

Tobin grins and shrugs. “Yeah, well, I have to play the cards I can. I’ll lose out on cool points to her favorite pro soccer player.” 

“Mmm, yeah, that pro soccer player card has its perks, I guess,” Christen responds with a grin of her own. 

Carli jogs past and clears her throat, and it’s only then that Christen realizes that she’s still very much up in Tobin’s space and everyone else is stretching and warming up while she’s-

Not flirting. 

Definitely not flirting. 

Right? 

  
  
  


It doesn’t matter what she does at practice today, Tobin is at the forefront of her mind. It doesn’t help that it seems like no matter what drill she’s running, Tobin is right there with her camera. It’s not that she’s being more invasive today than she has been any other day. She’s doing her job, the same as every other day she’s been there. 

It’s just that Christen is so incredibly aware of her, everywhere she moves. She can’t stop herself from glancing to the sidelines when Tobin’s right there shooting. She can’t stop the way her heart skips a beat when Tobin moves the camera aside enough to shoot her a grin. 

She scores in a scrimmage and looks straight to Tobin as she runs her hands through her hair, jogging back. Tobin whoops a cheer and Christen feels warm from more than just the heat in the air and the effort of her exertion. 

“You’re on fire today, Chris,” Julie says as she passes her. 

“Thanks,” she mutters, feeling like she really might be as Tobin throws her a wink. 

  
  
  


It’s probably a bit too bold, and maybe a little stupid, but she can’t resist picking up Tobin’s camera from where it sits on the bleachers and looking through the viewfinder. 

“Hey!” Tobin protests, swiping for it, but there’s a grin on her face and she doesn’t actually seem upset, so Christen dances out of reach and pulls off the lens cap. “Do you even know how to use it?” Tobin challenges. 

Christen checks the settings and turns them to automatic, and grins. “I have an inkling. Point and click?” she suggests, holding it up with a grin and snapping a picture of Tobin, who holds up her hand to block the shot. “Do you know how to be in a picture?” Christen challenges right back. 

She can see the faint blush gracing Tobin’s cheeks and she wants to see if she can bring it out more as Tobin shakes her head. 

“I’m better behind the lens.”

“Come on, give me a smile,” Christen coaxes, turning the camera to the side and attempting another picture. 

She considers it a win when Tobin just looks up shyly instead of blocking the shot. There’s a hint of a smile on her face, but not the big, bold smile that Christen finds herself seeking out. The one that takes up her whole face and reaches her eyes and makes Christen feel happy just at the sight of it. 

“How about I take more pictures of you, instead,” Tobin offers, reaching for the camera. 

Christen takes a playful step back and raises her eyebrow at her over the top of the camera. “How many pictures of you do you even have? Everyone should have some good pictures of themselves.” 

“I have pictures of me!” Tobin replies, but she’s stifling a laugh and looks a little sheepish. 

“More than one?” Christen teases, bringing the camera back to her eye and snapping another picture. 

“Yes! I have a soccer picture from like every year growing up,” Tobin replies, sticking out her tongue. 

“Oooh, one picture a year. That’s a lot,” Christen jokes, snapping another quick picture of Tobin with her tongue out, and doing her best to ignore the reasoning behind it. 

“I mean, two, really, because there’s always the team picture, too,” Tobin retorts, with a barely repressed smile. 

“Two whole pictures a year? Wow. And how many have you taken of...I dunno, just me? Just today?” 

The blush that that question coaxes to Tobin’s cheeks makes Christen’s breath catch in her throat. 

“More than two,” Tobin admits. 

“Well, now you’ll have more than two of you this year!” Christen declares, snapping a few more, and dancing away when Tobin pretends to lunge at her. “I think I’m maybe at like 6? I think a few more is good!” she says, letting Tobin begin to chase her. 

She’s rewarded with a full on laugh as Tobin attempts (though not really very hard) to get her camera back. 

“Woah! Tobs, you’re letting someone else touch your camera??” 

The unfamiliar voice stops Christen in her tracks and Tobin’s eyes go wide as she looks towards the sidelines. 

“Amy??” Tobin asks, and Christen turns to see Tobin’s blonde friend that she’d met at the game the day before. “What’re you doing here? How did you get in?”

“I invited her,” Kelley declares with a grin, throwing an arm around Amy’s shoulders. “You’ve got cool friends, Tobito, and I wanted to get to know them better, but Lauren couldn’t make it today.” 

“What she said,” Amy adds, pointing at Kelley. 

“Oh God. This is not going to end well,” Tobin murmurs, and Christen can only agree as they fall into step beside each other, heading over to Amy and Kelley. 

“Tobin, you’re seriously letting her use your camera? You MUST be special, Christen. I’m not even allowed to touch it!” Amy declares. 

The statement combined with the look that Amy’s giving her makes Christen’s cheeks flush, and she shifts awkwardly on her feet. “Oh, I, um, just kind of stole it. I just took a few pictures of her,” Christen mumbles, handing the camera back.

Tobin’s fingers brush hers as she takes it from her, and they’re warm and inviting, and it only serves to make Christen’s blush worse. 

“Well, then you must be magic if you managed to get pictures of her. Tobs is one hell of a camera dodger,” Amy replies. 

“Shut up, Amy,” Tobin mutters, giving her friend a little shove. 

Christen risks a glance at Tobin and notes the way her cheeks are a dark shade of pink, and the knowledge makes her heart race just a little. 

Kelley, for her part, looks absolutely delighted. “Hey, Tobs, can I touch your camera?” she asks. 

Tobin instinctively holds the camera as high as she can. “No. Definitely not.”

“So what you’re saying is that I’m not as special as Chris?” Kelley asks. 

“Yes,” Tobin replies quickly. 

Christen’s eyes go wide at that. 

“She’s not nearly as annoying,” Tobin adds, but it’s a little too late to stop the way that Christen’s heart is hammering away in her chest. 

“And she’s cuter,” Tobin says, shooting Christen a quick glance that might just stop her heart altogether. 

“Oof, you know how to cut deep, Tobito,” Kelley complains, holding her hand to her heart, but her eyes meet Christen’s with a pointed look. 

Tobin’s just teasing Kelley. Right? 

Except with the way that Tobin’s still standing right beside her and the little look she’d shot her, it doesn’t feel like it. 

“So what are you doing here, Amy? Really?” Tobin asks, changing the subject. 

“Kelley invited me to see Providence Park from the field. How could I say no? Plus a chance to hang with the best soccer players in the world? Don’t be greedy, Tobin. You can share them.”

Christen’s breath catches in her throat again when Tobin throws an arm around her shoulder and says, “Maybe I don’t want to,” clearly joking with Amy. 

Even though it’s just a joke, it makes something in Christen’s test tighten with a pressure that she’s only now realizing has been there from the first moment she met Tobin. 

“So selfish,” Amy retorts, sticking out her tongue, and Tobin copies her.

Her arm is still resting firmly around Christen’s shoulders, and Christen finds herself wrapping her arm around Tobin’s waist without thinking about it until the contact has been made, and then it’s almost all she can think about. They’re standing there, arms around each other, on a soccer field, surrounded by other people, but somehow it feels too intimate. She can’t take it back, though. If she does, it will make it weird. 

Worse is the realization that she doesn’t want to break the contact. 

This whole time her teammates have been teasing her about developing crushes, and here she is, already in far too deep. 

It’s a horrible idea. 

It can’t work out.

And yet, right now, she can’t bring herself to stop. 

She has a crush, and as Tobin continues to joke with Amy and Kelley and keeps her arm around Christen, all Christen can really do is lean into it. 

What the fuck is wrong with her?


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin tries to flirt and gets roped into some babysitting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dunno if everyone else is having as hard a day as I am with all of the trade news in the NWSL, but I felt like I wanted to put something fluffy out into the world to give people something happy to read in case they are. I'm so heartbroken over Sonny being traded. I only hope she's happy with the move. Ugh, it's been a day.   
Anyway, have some happy preathness. I was blown away by the feedback from last chapter and it's probably part of why there is a new chapter so quickly, so thank you all for taking the time to comment! I hope you enjoy this one.   
xx

“Okay, it’s a crush. It’s a really bad crush and I don’t know what to do about it because the timing is horrible,” Tobin sighs, flopping down onto her couch and letting Lauren unpack the Thai food she’d picked up on the way home. 

“We know,” Amy says. 

“She’s leaving in less than a week. And who knows when she’ll be back in Portland!” 

“There’s such a thing as a long distance relationship,” Lauren advises. 

“Yeah, and they suck!” Tobin retorts. 

“How do you know, have you ever had one?” Amy shoots back.

“No, but it doesn’t take a genius to work it out! Besides, she might not feel the same about me.”

She ignores the pointed looks that she gets from both of her friends. They don’t know. Christen hasn’t told them anything. 

“She was full on flirting with you today,” Amy counters. 

“She was teasing me,” Tobin replies, her cheeks flushing with heat. 

“Teasing IS flirting you idiot,” Amy says affectionately “Especially the way she was doing it.” 

Tobin can’t help the way her heart skips a beat. She wants Amy to be right. In the moment she’d let herself believe that Christen was flirting back. It had felt good to have her attention like that, to chase her a little, to play like they didn’t have this deadline of her leaving over their heads. But it had just been a little play. That was it. Even if there had been flirting, it didn’t mean that Christen meant anything by it. 

Tobin reaches for her camera bag and pulls out her camera. She flips through the most recent ones taken and can’t help smiling. Normally she hates any picture of herself, but she has to admit that these aren’t bad. Maybe it’s just the knowledge of who was holding the camera. 

“Aww, look at those heart eyes,” Lauren says coming up behind her and leaning over the back of the couch to peer over her shoulder. 

“Shut up,” Tobin mutters, waving her away, but all she does is shift over. 

“Dinner’s served,” Lauren informs her. 

“Ooh, yum!” Amy declares, getting up and hurrying to the table, but Tobin’s past the pictures of herself now and she’s hit one of Christen. She’s all smiles, calling to Julie on the field, her arms are toned and her shorts are pulled up one leg a bit showing off her incredible thigh and her skin gleams from sweat and she’s absolutely breathtaking. 

“I think you’ve gotta take a chance,” Lauren murmurs gently, putting a warm hand on her shoulder. 

Tobin closes her eyes and lets her head fall back against the back of the couch. She doesn’t want to, and yet she knows Lauren’s right. “Maybe.” 

“And while you’re doing that, any chance you’ll babysit for me tomorrow? Jrue signed us up for some cooking class and I really want to go and you’re my absolute favorite childless friend and I will love you forever?” 

Tobin laughs. “Flattery will get you everywhere.”

Lauren kisses her on the cheek. “Thank you! I owe you!” she calls over her shoulder as she heads to the table.

“I’m holding you to that!” Tobin declares as she puts her camera back away and hops over the back of the couch to join her friends in the kitchen. 

At least babysitting will give her something to focus on that isn’t Christen. 

  
  
  


“So I got you something,” Tobin informs Christen when she sees her first thing. It’s stupid, really. It was an impulse purchase. She’s not 100% sure that Christen will be amused instead of offended. She’s taking the risk, though. 

Her chest flushes with warmth at the way that Christen’s bright green eyes light up and a smile spreads across her face. 

“You did?” 

Tobin nods, holding the present behind her back, her fingers pressing into the cheap plastic.

“What?” Christen asks, attempting to peer around her, but Tobin scoots to the side so that Christen can’t see it, not quite ready to reveal it. 

“It’s nothing big,” she replies instead. 

“Are you gonna give it to me?” Christen asks, moving closer and trying to look behind Tobin’s back again. 

“She’d like to,” Kelley mutters with a smirk as she moves past them into the locker room. 

Tobin can feel a blush burn its way across her cheeks, but if Christen heard Kelley, she doesn’t say anything. Tobin clears her throat and tries to regain her composure, feeling like this is a stupider idea by the second. She’s in it now, though, and Christen is reaching out for her, fingers brushing against her arm as she tries to get Tobin to hand over the present. 

“It turns out you’re an okay photographer,” Tobin informs her, trying not to get distracted by Christen’s touch. 

“Wow, such an effusive compliment,” Christen teases, and Tobin finds herself grinning wider in response. 

“And, you know, this is kind of a tough job. You guys keep me pretty busy,” Tobin continues, switching the hand that the present is in when Christen reaches around her to try to get it. 

It pushes Christen right up in her space and Tobin has to focus on keeping her breathing even as she draws it out a little more. 

“Not too busy to tease me,” Christen replies, pouting out her lip adorably. 

It takes all of Tobin’s willpower not to kiss the pout away, but she’s pushing things as it is, she knows. She brings her hand out from behind her back, holding it up between their bodies, realizing when her hand bumps into Christen’s stomach, just how close they are. 

“So I thought maybe you could help me out today?” she can’t stop the smirk on her lips as Christen takes in the disposable camera. 

She starts to laugh as she takes it from Tobin, her fingers warm as they brush against Tobin’s. 

“You’re such a dork,” Christen says, shaking her head, but her tone is so affectionate it tugs at Tobin’s heart. 

“I mean, I can give it to Kelley, I guess,” Tobin jokes, reaching for the camera, but Christen holds it up out of reach and raises an eyebrow at her. 

“Kelley? Please. You’d end up with pictures of her abs and nothing else.”

“Hey!” Kelley protests, but Tobin laughs, and Harry calls, “Not wrong!”

“Are you saying I won’t get any pictures of your abs?” The words are out before she’s thought them through. It was supposed to be a joke. Her tone is teasing, but her eyes go wide when she realizes what she’s implied. 

Christen hesitates, her eyebrow still raised, and a smirk tugging on the corner of her lips. 

“Pretty sure you have pictures of her naked,” Ash says. 

“All of us naked,” Ali points out. 

Tobin feels her cheeks flush, and Christen is still looking at her with an expression she can’t quite read. 

“Are you saying you WANT pictures of my abs?” Christen challenges, holding her gaze. 

She should say no. She should salvage whatever she can of this suddenly awkward situation. Instead her lips say, “Well, I wouldn’t say no.”

“Well, I guess you’ll have to wait and see,” Christen replies with grin and a wink before turning and wandering off to get changed. 

Tobin isn’t sure what she expected when she gave Christen the camera, but it wasn’t THAT. 

“You okay there, Harry? Your mouth’s hanging open a bit. I think you might be drooling just a little,” Harry asks, dabbing at Tobin’s mouth with the corner of her shirt. 

Tobin swipes her away. “Shut up,” she grumbles, feeling the blush on her cheeks deepen. “I am not.”

“Might as well be,” Harry replies with a smirk. 

Tobin turns a glare on her. 

“Don’t worry. She doesn’t mind,” Harry says, throwing an arm around Tobin’s shoulders. “Come on, let’s go get you set up so you can add to your photo collection of her today.”

Before Tobin can protest, Harry is leading her out of the locker room and towards the field, her words echoing in Tobin’s head. 

  
  
  
  


“So, want to go with me to get the film developed? See how amazing my photos are?” Christen asks with a smile. 

It’s an innocent invitation. It’s not really suggestive of anything more. And yet, Tobin’s heart skips a beat at her words. 

“I’d love to!” she replies, but then reality sets in. “But I have to get home. I promised Lauren I’d babysit Jrue tonight.”

“Oh,” Christen says, and Tobin can almost swear she sees disappointment in her features. 

Maybe that’s what emboldens her to say, “You’re welcome to join, if you want. We can put in the photos on our way. I’m sure Jrue would love to see her favorite player.”

The way that Christen’s whole face lights up makes Tobin feel warm and fuzzy inside. She knows that it’s for Jrue and not for her, but just the fact that Christen so quickly has become attached to someone so important to her life somehow means a lot. 

“Really?” Christen asks. 

Tobin nods. “I mean, don’t try to steal my spot as coolest Auntie and I don’t have a problem with it. But, I mean, I also get it if you have better ways to spend your night than hanging out with your photographer and her niece, I get it too…” She’s giving her an out. She doesn’t think she’ll take it, but she feels like she needs to offer it anyway. 

“I dunno. Sounds like a pretty enticing offer to me,” Christen replies with a shy smile. 

Tobin steps forward, into her space just a little more. “Yeah?” she asks. It’s felt like something has been shifting between them all day. It’s not just that she’s finally admitted her crush to herself. She’s fairly certain it’s not just that, at least. She doesn’t think she’s imagining the way that Christen leans in when Tobin flirts (not that she’s flirting a lot, or especially well, but she IS flirting a little - she’s trying to). 

“I mean the photographer is all right company,” Christen says. “But Jrue just sweetens the deal.”

“Oof,” Tobin replies, clutching her chest but unable to keep the hint of a smile off her lips. “All right company. Just what every girl always wants to hear.” 

“Will you two stop flirting and get out of here already?” 

Honestly, Tobin could kill Ash right now. It’s one thing to attempt to flirt, and something else entirely to get called out on it. She takes a step back, feeling her cheeks flush with color. 

“We weren’t- I wasn’t -”

“Fishing for compliments from a pretty girl?” Kelley suggests popping up at her elbow. “Yeah you were. Don’t worry, Tobs. We all think you’re great company. Right, Chris?” 

Christen glares and Tobin doesn’t blame her. 

“I was not fishing for anything,” Tobin grumbles. 

“Uh-huh. Okay. Sure. Well, you two have fun ‘babysitting’ tonight,” Kelley declares. 

“There is no need for the air quotes, Kel,” Christen hisses and Tobin wants to be mad but there’s an adorable blush forming on her cheeks. 

“Will you two crazy kids get out of here already? Do we have to kick you out?” Kelley asks. 

Christen seems like she wants to argue, but she looks at Tobin and Tobin offers her a small shrug and a half-smile that she hopes comes across as charming rather than lazy. 

She leans in close to Kelley and says, “Fine. Don’t wait up,” in such a suggestive way that Tobin is left reminding herself to breathe and scrambling after her a moment later when she calls over her shoulder, “Coming, Tobs?” 

It’s a joke. She’s just teasing Kelley. She knows that, rationally. 

And yet Tobin’s heart is pounding in her chest and suddenly babysitting is the farthest thing from her mind as she follows Christen out of the stadium and towards her car. 

  
  
  


“I don’t want it.” 

Tobin frowns. Jrue loves grilled cheese sandwiches. Why is she suddenly refusing it? 

“It’s grilled cheese!” Tobin coaxes. “Mmm. Cheese!” 

Jrue crosses her arms and shakes her head. 

“You know, Christen LOVES grilled cheese sandwiches,” Tobin attempts a different tactic. She looks to Christen for help, and Christen nods vehemently. 

“Mm. So much! I love them. You know, Tobin, that looks so good. Can I have one too please?” 

Jrue brightens a little at that. “You eat it,” she says, shoving her plate towards Christen. 

Christen offers Tobin a sympathetic look as Tobin thinks,  _ So much for that idea. _

“No, Jrue, YOU need to eat it. You need to eat to become a big strong girl so that you can play soccer just like Auntie Toto and Christen!”

“Don’t like it,” Jrue says, sticking out her tongue when Tobin slides the plate back towards her. 

“What? Since when?” Tobin demands. 

“I only like the triangle one,” Jrue replies. 

Tobin feels her body relax. The mystery has been solved. She smiles at Christen who still looks a little confused. 

“Of course,” Tobin says. “Silly me. Triangle Grilled Cheese coming right up. Can I eat this inferior rectangle one?” 

Jrue starts to nod, then shakes her head when the sandwich is already halfway to Tobin’s mouth. “No. Kissten eat it.”

“Aww, sweetie, I don’t mind if Tobin eats it,” Christen replies. 

Jrue shakes her head again. 

“What if I share it with Tobin? Would that be okay?” Christen asks. 

Jrue considers this for a moment before nodding her approval. 

“So gracious. Thank you,” Tobin says with exaggerated manners, shooting Christen a grin over her half of grilled cheese. “Only the finest of dinners to share with you, my dear.”

Christen picks up the other half with a grin and takes a nibble. “Mm. Delicious. You make an A+ grilled cheese, Tobs. I bet the girls are flocking here with fine dining like this.” 

Tobin laughs as she starts to prepare a new sandwich for Jrue. “Oh yeah. All the ladies come knocking for my ability to put cheese on bread and heat it up.”

She glances sidelong at Christen, who is watching her with those incredible green eyes as she eats the sandwich. There’s a glint in her eyes that Tobin can’t quite place and a grin tugging at the corner of her lips, and Tobin really wants to push this banter a little further. 

“But, you know, I don’t make grilled cheese sandwiches just for anyone,” Tobin says. 

“No?” Christen asks, standing from her stool and moving closer to Tobin. “Is that right?”

Tobin nods. “You actually have to be pretty special to get a grilled cheese from me. Isn’t that right, JT?”

Jrue nods seriously, and Tobin flashes a broad grin at Christen. 

“Oh, well, then, I’m honored I’m special enough.”

“Well, only because Jrue says you’re okay,” Tobin teases. 

Christen laughs and it’s the most beautiful sound that Tobin’s ever heard. Christen’s light, lyrical giggle in her space, in her apartment. It fills her with warmth. 

Tobin had been self-conscious at first as Christen had taken in her apartment, perusing the pictures on the wall, seeming to observe everything. But Jrue had quickly demanded attention and it was hard to stay focussed on Christen’s assessment of her place when there’s an eager little girl who wants to kick a ball with Auntie Toto and also color and also paint all at the same time. 

“I’m so glad that I’ve got Jrue’s approval,” Christen says, and there’s a sincerity to her words that warms Tobin’s heart. She reaches over and runs some fingers through Jrue’s hair and offers her a smile. Jrue beams back at her. 

“Me too,” Tobin admits. 

Tobin finishes up the sandwich, careful to cut it in half diagonally this time, and places it on Jrue’s plate. “Voilà, mademoiselle. Your feast is served!” Tobin declares and Jrue giggles. 

“Tank you.”

“Welcome, munchkin,” Tobin replies, ruffling her hair. She takes a seat and looks expectantly at Christen who joins her a moment later. “Promise we can order something else as soon as we get her down,” Tobin murmurs, nudging her knee against Christen’s leg. 

Christen just smiles. “It’s fine.” 

Tobin turns back to Jrue. “That one good? Has Chef Tobin met with your approval?” 

Jrue giggles and nods around a full mouth. 

“And when mom asks, I gave you nothing but vegetables, right?” Tobin prompts. 

Jrue giggles harder and nods again. 

“Atta girl,” Tobin replies with a grin. 

“You’re secretly a bad influence, aren’t you?” Christen teases. 

“Who, me? Look one night of nobody forcing broccoli on her is not going to kill her.”

“True.”

Christen bites her lip and Tobin can’t help the way her eyes fall to her mouth. When she manages to lift her gaze back up, she can tell that Christen noticed. 

“So is Jrue’s approval like a requirement for you?” she asks softly. 

The question catches Tobin off-guard and she frowns, furrowing her brows. “What do you mean?” 

The blush that creeps up Christen’s cheeks is nothing short of endearing and it’s almost enough to distract Tobin from the question. 

“Nothing,” Christen mumbles. 

Tobin raises an eyebrow at her and gives her leg another nudge under the table with her knee. 

Christen hesitates and bites her lip for a second again. “Just...Is that how I get in good with you?”

It’s Tobin’s turn to blush then. “You were definitely already in good with me,” she admits, glancing at Jrue to see how much of the conversation she’s following, but she’s happily munching away at her sandwich, seemingly oblivious. “Jrue’s approval doesn’t hurt though.”

It’s not a lot. It’s not a huge admission, really. It’s nothing that Christen shouldn’t have been able to tell from her behavior over the last week and a bit. And yet it feels big. It’s enough to make Tobin’s breathing a little shallow and the blush on her cheeks a couple shades darker, and when Christen shoots her a smile in reply, she’s pretty sure her heart actually skips a beat. 

“That’s good to know,” Christen says in a thoughtful tone of voice.

Tobin wants to ask, “What about me?” She wants to say, “Am I in good with you yet?” She wants to press for more. 

But Jrue says, “I want some milk” and Christen hops up to get it for her, pausing to look to Tobin for instructions on where she keeps her glasses and Lauren texts to check in, and before Tobin can push it, the moment is gone. 

  
  
  


Tobin doesn’t like to think of herself as an overly emotional person. It’s not that she’s not in touch with her feelings, it’s just that, well, she doesn’t see a real need to focus on them that much. Seeing Christen Press - hair half tied up in a loose bun while the rest falls in loose curls around her shoulders, perfect skin, gleaming green eyes, soft smile on her gorgeous face - sitting on her couch in her living room holding a sleeping Jrue in her arms and gazing down at her with an expression full of love...It makes her feel like she’s melting in the best possible way. 

She almost doesn’t want to interrupt, but then Christen shifts slightly and Jrue lets out a sleepy whimper and Tobin approaches after all. 

“Want me to put her down?” Tobin asks. 

Christen hesitates, then nods. “If you don’t think it’ll wake her,” she whispers back. “I don’t mind holding her.”

Tobin shakes her head. She leans over them and scoops her arms under Jrue’s body, ignoring the part of her brain that’s telling her that she is full on touching all of Christen’s chest with the back of her one arm as she makes sure she has a good hold on Jrue before lifting her. It always surprises her how heavy such a small child can be when she’s asleep, but she manages the transition smoothly, Jrue’s eyes only fluttering open once as she deposits her in her own bed. She pulls her blanket up around her and keeps the door open a crack so that the room isn’t completely dark if she wakes up before Lauren comes to get her, and then she tiptoes back towards the living room, only taking heavier steps when she’s sure she’s far enough away. 

Christen is still sitting on her couch, and it’s starting to get a little bit late, but Tobin isn’t ready to say goodnight yet. Maybe it’s selfish, but she feels like she’s running out of time with this amazing woman as it is. 

“Want any more food?” Tobin asks, moving to put away the leftover takeout boxes from the Chinese they’d ordered once Jrue was happily fed. 

Christen shakes her head but joins her in the kitchen, and it’s surprisingly easy to put away the food with her, moving naturally around each other. 

“I should probably head out,” Christen murmurs when the fridge is closed for the final time and the wine glasses are put in the dishwasher. 

Tobin nods, feeling her heart sink. She knows she could make a move, but she’s still not sure what it would accomplish. It’s only a few days until Christen is walking back out of her life. It doesn’t feel like nearly enough time. “Sorry we didn’t get to pick up the pictures tonight.”

Christen shakes her head. “It’s fine. Just means we’ll have to look at them tomorrow.”

Tobin nods again, then hesitates. There are words that are on the tip of her tongue. She doesn’t know if they’re wise. She doesn’t know if she really wants to say them. She doesn’t manage to get them out. Instead, she hears herself say, “You could stay, if you want.”

Christen’s eyes meet hers and there’s a question there that she’s not quite sure she knows the words to, but she holds her gaze steady. 

Christen opens her mouth to respond, but Tobin cuts her off. 

“I mean, we’re going to the same place tomorrow anyway. It’s not like it would put me out to give you a ride. And I have clothes you could borrow. Or just have Kelley bring your warm ups for you. And I have a king size bed, or I can take the couch or-”

Christen’s finger on her lips is warm and surprising and Tobin almost keeps talking through it, but there’s a smirk on Christen’s lips, and a glint in her eyes, and it’s enough to take Tobin’s breath away. 

“Okay,” Christen says. “But we’re picking up the pictures on the way to the stadium tomorrow.”

Tobin can’t help being a little disappointed when Christen’s finger drops from her lips, but then her words kick in and she realizes what Christen has just agreed to. 

“Oh. Yeah. Okay. Sure!” 

Christen grins shyly at her through long lashes and Tobin finds that her heart is racing. 

“In that case do you want to watch a movie or something until Lauren comes to get Jrue?” 

Christen nods and reaches out a hand to Tobin, lacing their fingers together when Tobin takes it. “Sounds nice,” Christen replies. 

Tobin leads her to the couch and takes a seat, dropping her hand reluctantly, only to have Christen sit down right beside her and cuddle up. It’s so much more physical contact than they usually have and Tobin’s sure that Christen must be able to feel the way that her heart is practically beating out of her chest, but there’s no way that she’s going to move to put more distance between them. Not when if feels like Christen’s leaning in to whatever this is that’s happening here. 

They’re close enough that Tobin feels the shiver run down Christen’s spine and she grabs the blanket off of the back of her couch without thinking as Christen scrolls through Netflix. She drapes the blanket over both of them, reaching around Christen to spread it out better, and Christen leans into the touch so that when Tobin relaxes, she still has her arm around Christen’s shoulders. 

It feels like a lot and not enough all at once as Christen puts on a movie. Tobin barely pays attention to what’s playing as Christen shoots her a quick smile, then leans further into her. Her hair tickles Tobin’s arm, but she doesn’t mind, relishing instead the weight of Christen against her side. 

“I’m glad you’re staying,” she murmurs into soft black curls. 

Christen turns enough to make eye contact, and, God, she’s so incredibly close. It really wouldn’t take much at all for Tobin to just-

But she doesn’t, and Christen says, “Yeah, me too.”

For tonight, Tobin decides, this is enough. 


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Couch snuggles and bed sharing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit on the short side, but I wanted to get an update up and where I left it seemed like a good stopping point. I hope you guys enjoy! I've got another chaptered preath up now, too, so I'm gonna do my best to juggle them both and update in a timely manner, but I've also got 3 kids that are my first priority. Chapter is unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.
> 
> As always, comments fuel the writing, so if you feel like it please let me know what you think. Your feedback so far has been amazing, so thank you so much!  
xx

She should go. She should head back to the hotel. She doesn’t really know why she’s not. Except that this whole night feels...different, like there’s a fundamental shift in the way they’re relating to each other. She’d love to put it down to Jrue being there and the way everything just feels so domestic, but she knows it’s more than that. 

Tobin has been flirting with her all day. Definitely flirting. There’s no denying it. There’s no mistaking her intentions. It’s not like she’s buying cameras for the rest of the team or inviting them over to her place. 

Tobin likes her. 

The knowledge simultaneously feels heavy in her chest and makes her feel like she’s floating on air. 

What’s more is she’s flirting back. Kelley’s already called her out in an ignored series of texts. She can only imagine how much worse the teasing will be when she doesn’t come back to the hotel tonight, but she can’t help it. She can’t bring herself to want to leave. 

Not when Tobin’s body is so comfortably slotted next to hers on the couch, warmth radiating off of her. Not when Tobin’s arm is wrapped around her shoulders, a little possessively. Not when she’s already fighting every urge in her body to turn and kiss her. 

She doesn’t have the fight left in her to force herself to leave. 

There’s a quiet knock at the door and Christen sits up straight so that Tobin can untangle herself and go to the door. 

Lauren looks surprised when she sees Christen, but the surprise quickly morphs into a smile and a wave of greeting that Christen returns. 

“Want me to get her for you?” Tobin offers. 

“Sure,” Lauren replies. “Thanks again, Tobs. You’re the best.”

“I know,” Tobin throws over her shoulder with a grin as she heads towards her bedroom. 

Christen stands and makes her way over to Lauren, feeling like she should provide some explanation for her presence, her heart rate increasing as she nears her. 

“I hope you don’t mind that I’m here. Tobin invited me to help her babysit and Jrue is such a sweet kid, I just -”

Lauren shakes her head and offers a warm smile. “I don’t mind. I’m sure Jrue was thrilled. She’s been talking about you nonstop since the other day.” 

Christen can’t help brightening at that. “Really?” 

Lauren nods. “She’s pretty smitten.”

“Aww, well, she’s not the only one. She’s stolen my heart.”

Lauren smiles wider, but then her expression shifts to thoughtful. “So are you staying over tonight?”

Christen can feel the scrutiny of her gaze, and shifts her weight uncomfortably from one foot to the other. “Um, yeah. Probably just on the couch, you know? But it’s late and -”

“I’m not here to judge you,” Lauren replies with a slight chuckle. “I just...I’m looking out for my friend, you know? Tobin’s...She’s something special. She deserves- Well, she deserves the world, and…” 

Christen can see the internal struggle with Lauren about how much to say, but it doesn’t matter, because Christen understands what she’s getting at. This is the best friend warning. They’re not even anything yet and Christen is being cautioned with Tobin’s heart, and already she feels guilty. She can’t be what Tobin deserves. Not with her schedule. Not with her travel. Not with the life she leads and the career she’s chosen. She nods anyway. “I know. She does,” she agrees, because that is not a lie. 

Tobin re-emerges carrying a large backpack and a sleeping Jrue.

Jrue only stirs a little as Tobin transfers her to Lauren’s arms and Lauren places a tender kiss to her forehead as she murmurs, “Mama’s here, baby girl. Mama’s got you.”

It’s such a tender moment that Christen almost feels like she’s intruding. 

Tobin carefully helps Lauren put the backpack on while disturbing Jrue as little as possible, as Lauren says, “I hope she didn’t give you any trouble.”

“Only at dinner. Otherwise she was a sweetheart.”

“Let me guess, you cut the grilled cheese wrong?” 

Tobin chuckles. “Yep.”

“Did she want rectangles or triangles today?” Lauren asks. 

“Triangles,” Tobin replies. 

Lauren lets out a small laugh. “Of course. It was rectangles yesterday. Wouldn’t want any consistency.”

Tobin laughs too and Christen finds herself chuckling along. 

“Okay, well, I should get her home. Hopefully she transfers back to her bed okay! Wish me luck!” Lauren says, placing a kiss on Tobin’s cheek. “Brunch Sunday?”

Tobin nods. “Yep.”

“Okay. Um...Christen, why don’t you join us?” Lauren suggests. 

Christen’s heart leaps into her throat at the unexpected invitation, but she nods. “Yeah. Um, I have to check my schedule, but I’d like that.”

“Great. Goodnight ladies! Be good!” Lauren adds, looking pointedly at Tobin. 

“I’m always good,” Tobin shoots back, holding the door open for Lauren. 

“Love you!” Lauren calls over her shoulder. 

“Love you, too!” Tobin calls after her before shutting the door behind them. 

Tobin turns back to Christen and there’s a shift in the air, a tension that hadn’t been there a moment ago. 

“You’re always good, huh?” Christen asks the first thing that comes to mind. It sounds so much flirtier than she meant it to and Tobin raises an eyebrow in response and takes a step towards her. 

“Well, maybe not always,” she admits and her voice has a husky quality that makes tension coil low in Christen’s stomach. 

“Oh?” Christen asks, and it’s like her feet have a mind of their own as she steps towards Tobin. 

They’re close enough now that she could reach out and touch her, but she doesn’t, she resists, her fingers twitching by her sides at the effort. 

Tobin’s eyes meet hers and suddenly the air between them feels heavy and charged, and Christen’s not sure she remembers how to breathe, but then Tobin’s stepping back with a shy smile and saying, “We should probably get to bed, huh? It’s kind of late and I don’t want to be responsible for you not doing well at training tomorrow.” 

Christen tells herself she’s not disappointed. She tells herself that it’s better that that moment didn’t lead to anything. She offers a small smile and nods. “Yeah. Probably. Um, I’ll just...sleep on the couch. Do you have a pillow I could borrow?”

Tobin frowns at that. “Why? My bed is plenty big and it’s really comfortable. I’d say ask Jrue, but she left.” 

Christen chuckles, but her heart is beating faster in her chest and she’s really not sure if lying in bed beside Tobin all night is a smart decision. 

“I mean, if you’d rather stay on the couch, that’s okay, but honestly my bed is big and...I don’t mind sharing.”

Christen bites her lower lip and hesitates. She shouldn’t. She really shouldn’t. “Okay. I mean, yeah, sure. I’ll sleep with you.”

Tobin’s eyes go wide and Christen realizes too late what it sounds like. 

“I mean in your bed. With you. I’ll sleep next to you in bed-” Christen cuts herself off as Tobin’s smirk grows and she raises an eyebrow at her. 

“You’re cute when you’re flustered,” Tobin says. 

There’s nothing equivocal about that, and the words coil tightly in her chest, but Tobin just winks, and turns away saying, “I’ll get you something to sleep in.”

  
  


Logically she knows that the T-shirt she’s wearing with the name Heath and the number 17 on the back probably the most comfortable shirt she’s ever worn, but it’s soft and it’s warm and there’s something about wearing clothes with Tobin’s name and number that makes her feel-

Well, she’s not really sure what. She’s not sure she really wants to put a name to it. 

“Oh, I’ve still got your clothes, actually. Would you rather wear them?” Tobin asks, holding up the shorts with the number 23 that she’d lent her, but Christen shakes her head. 

Maybe a little too quickly, if Tobin’s smirk is anything to go by.

“No, I’m already wearing these and they’re comfy,” Christen replies. 

“Well you should probably remember to take these with you tomorrow,” Tobin says, setting the shorts and T-shirt on top of her dresser. 

Tobin climbs into bed and she’s wearing those large, dark-rimmed glasses again that only serve to make her look even more adorable, and Christen’s really considering how incredibly stupid she was to agree to share a bed with her because right now keeping her hands to herself is the farthest thing from her mind, but she really, REALLY needs to. 

“Oh, um, would you rather have this side? I don’t mind,” Tobin says when Christen doesn’t immediately climb into bed beside her, but Christen shakes her head. 

“Um, no, I usually sleep on the other side,” Christen replies, her voice cracking slightly. She clears her throat to try to cover it and does her best not to think about what that means about their compatibility. 

She makes her way to the other side of the bed and climbs in, scooting closer to the middle, towards the warmth of Tobin’s body. Towards Tobin. 

It’s only after Tobin looks shyly up at her that she realizes just how easily she did that, like there was nothing more that she wanted than to be closer to her.

And, fuck, is there anything she wants more? Tobin’s eyes are curious as they search hers and she’s biting her lip in this way that somehow manages to be both cute and hot and she’s so close. 

It would be so easy to-

“Do you snore?” Christen blurts, cutting off her own train of thought. 

“Hmm?” Tobin asks, eyes going a little wide. 

“Do you snore?” Christen repeats. 

“Oh, um...not really? If I have a cold sometimes. You?”

Christen shakes her head. “Not that anyone’s ever complained, and I’ve roomed with Kelley, so-”

“She would have,” Tobin finishes with a small laugh. 

Christen nods. 

“Are you good if I turn out the light?” Tobin asks, reaching for the lamp on her bedside table. 

Christen nods again and Tobin turns off the light. 

It takes her eyes a second to adjust and then she snuggles down under the covers, trying not to be overly aware of Tobin’s movements beside her. 

She’s staring at the ceiling in the faint moonlight let in by the blinds, willing herself to sleep easily, willing herself not to say something stupid, willing herself to keep her hands to herself. 

“I had fun with you tonight,” Tobin says, and when Christen turns her head she realizes that Tobin is on her side, looking at her. 

Tobin’s gaze is heated and her words carry weight behind them and suddenly Christen feels like she can’t quite breathe properly. She rolls onto her side to face Tobin, picking out her shy smile in the darkness. 

“Me too,” she confesses. “I like being here.”

She shouldn’t have added that. She shouldn’t have because now there’s this tension hanging between them and the way that Tobin is looking at her-

The way Tobin’s eyes dip to her lips before coming back up to meet her eyes-

The way Tobin licks her own lips and Christen can’t help but look to them-

She’s reaching out towards Tobin’s hand on the bed between them before she can stop herself, tracing a finger along Tobin’s. She turns her focus onto that, to how Tobin’s fingers feel soft and warm beneath hers, how the turn to capture hers, slotting together perfectly. 

“It’s comfortable here,” she says, voice barely above a whisper, but it still feels so loud in the stillness of the dark room. It’s not really what she means, but it’s close enough. What she means is, “It’s comfortable with you.” Too comfortable. Too enticing. 

Tobin’s thumb rubs across the back of her hand, a little rough, a little soothing. 

“Good,” Tobin murmurs back after a pause that feels just a little too long, like maybe Christen isn’t the only one who’s thinking things she’s not saying. 

Christen brings her eyes back up to meet Tobin’s and they’re boring into her with such intensity that Christen’s breath catches in her throat. 

“I’m really glad I got the job,” Tobin says, scooting a little closer. 

Christen can feel her breath hitting her cheek and and she can see the way Tobin’s eyes gleam in the limited light from the window and, God, she’s stunning so up close. Genuinely stunning. It takes Christen’s brain a moment to process Tobin’s words, and even then she doesn’t really know what Tobin means, too distracted by the hint of a smile on her lips. 

(God, have her lips always looked so damn kissable?)

“Shooting you guys for the calendar. I’m glad you went with me,” Tobin explains, extricating her hand from Christen’s to trail her fingers up and down her forearm. 

A shiver runs through Christen and her breaths are shallow and it’s too much and not enough all at once. She finds herself scooting in a little closer. Close enough that just the smallest shift would find her resting her forehead against Tobin’s. Just a little tilt of her head and her lips could meet Tobin’s and-

“Me, too,” she says. “I can’t imagine stripping down to nothing in front of anyone else.”

She can feel the blush that burns across her cheeks as soon as the words leave her mouth, but it’s dark enough that Tobin probably can’t see it. Tobin’s fingers still on her arm, and they’re so close that Christen can feel the way that Tobin stops breathing, just for a second. 

“No?” Tobin asks, and she’s biting her lip and looking at Christen through long lashes and-

Fuck!

She wants so much. She wants to give in. She wants to touch her and kiss her and hold on and never let go-

And that thought is sobering. That’s not the thought of a simple crush. That’s-

She’s only known her a week and a half.

It’s ridiculous to feel that way.

She leans away, just a little, a small repositioning, but Tobin already feels too far away. 

She opens her mouth to say, “We should go to bed,” but Tobin’s fingers find hers on the bed again and she threads her fingers through Christen’s, lifting their hands between them a little. 

“I don’t want to imagine you stripping for anyone else.”

There’s so much in those few words. It’s as good as an admission, and Christen feels the weight of them pressing down on her chest. 

“Have you- Have you thought about it?” She doesn’t know why she’s asking. She’s not sure she really wants the answer. 

“Have I thought about...what?” Tobin coaxes, and again the intensity of her gaze makes Christen feel hot all over. 

“About me. At the shoot...When I was-” Her voice is coming out hoarse and a little husky. Images of Tobin blushing faintly, awkwardly repositioning her with soft hands, freezing when she caught sight of her nipple. God, she’s seen her completely naked. The knowledge seems to properly sink in for the first time and she’s never been more thankful for the dark of the room because she knows she’s blushing harder than she ever has before. This gorgeous, sexy, sweet woman before her has already seen her naked, stripped bare. She has PHOTOS of it. 

“Yes,” Tobin confesses. “You were- You ARE the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I couldn’t- You short-circuited my brain.”

And that’s...That knowledge does things to Christen. There’s a heat pooling low in her gut and it feels like a tension is coiled inside her and it feels like she might just burst if she doesn’t do SOMETHING, but then Tobin’s laughing a little and saying, “God, I probably seemed like such an idiot that day. I could barely talk when it was your turn.”

“No,” Christen is quick to correct her. “You were adorable. And very professional. I thought- I didn’t think that you-”

She can’t bring herself to say it. If she finishes the sentence then she’s acknowledging her feelings too, and if she does that-

She leaves in a few days. Brunch on Sunday will probably be the last she sees of Tobin for months if not forever. 

“Well, however I came across, I’m really glad I got to meet you,” Tobin says. 

She leans in and Christen doesn’t dare breathe, just finds herself tilting her head a bit to make a kiss easier for Tobin.

But then Tobin’s lips press into her cheek, lingering there, burning the memory of them onto Christen’s skin. 

“We should get some sleep,” Tobin whispers into her ear, and then she’s laying back and pulling the blanket up around her a little more and closing her eyes. “Goodnight, Chris,” Tobin mumbles, and somehow she already sounds sleepy. 

“Goodnight, Tobin,” Christen echoes. She brings her fingers up to touch her cheek where Tobin had kissed her. She can still feel her lips lingering there. She closes her eyes and pulls up the blanket, a small smile on her face, but it’s long after Tobin’s breathing has evened out that her brain settles enough for her to fall asleep too. 

Tonight has been wonderful, and yet it’s left her with one undeniable piece of knowledge: 

She is totally, utterly screwed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I KNOW they could have kissed. Don't kill me. I love you all!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin tries to handle her morning after waking up to Christen Press in her bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait AGAIN! I am truly overwhelmed by the feedback I got last chapter (even if it involved death threats *looks pointedly at a few of you*). Seriously, you have no idea how much it means to me that people are enjoying this story and it's resonating with you! Whenever I get a comment for this is makes my day. I hope you enjoy this chapter. It didn't play out how I initially planned, but it works.   
Enjoy!  
xx

Tobin has never really been a morning person. She’s always kind of slow to wake up, and it usually takes her a solid few minutes to properly become aware of her surroundings. This morning her first fuzzy thought is,  _ warm _ . She smiles, her eyes still closed, shifting further into the warmth. That’s when her second thought hits her.  _ Soft. _ It’s a good combination. She likes warm and soft. She presses her fingers into the soft with a contented little sigh. It’s only when the softness beneath her fingers shifts that a thought that consists of more than one word runs through her mind. 

_ Not alone. _

She opens her eyes, but everything is bleary, so she closes them hard and then tries again. 

Curly black hair is splayed across her pillow. Smooth light brown skin leading to perfectly sculpted cheekbones and gorgeous lips parted a little. Tobin swallows hard and suddenly she is far more awake. 

Christen Press is in her bed. Christen Press is in her bed and curled up with her. Christen Press’s legs are tangled in her own and Christen Press’s bare stomach is under her hand and Christen Press’s eyes are fluttering open. 

_ Oh. _

_ Oh fuck. _

It’s not that she’s never woken up in bed with someone before, but she’s never felt this tightness in her chest and this fluttering in her stomach just from someone opening their eyes and looking at her. 

It’s-

It’s a little terrifying if she’s honest. 

The way something so little makes her feel so much. 

Christen’s eyes are bright and the most amazing shade of pale green and then she ducks her head shyly and there’s an attractive blush on her cheeks and Tobin has to fight every cell in her body to resist the urge to lean forward and kiss her. 

“Hi,” Christen murmurs. 

“Hi,” Tobin replies, feeling a little dazed. Her fingers stroke against Christen’s skin, relishing how smoothe it is, how soft, and then she feels Christen’s muscles tense beneath her touch and realizes exactly what she’s doing. 

She pulls her hand away quickly with a mumbled, “Sorry. I didn’t- I wasn’t thinking. I didn’t mean-” and a blush burning its way across her cheeks. 

Christen’s hand finds hers and gives it a squeeze. “It’s fine.”

Tobin nods, but she still feels embarrassed and she knows that her blush is only getting worse. On top of that, she’s now painfully aware of the way her leg is slotted in between Christen’s, of the smooth skin and firm muscles of her legs, of the way that it wouldn’t take very much movement for her to just press her thigh up between Christen’s and-

She bites her lower lip to stop herself from doing or saying anything inappropriate. 

There’s been a lot of flirting, but no actual moves made, and the boldness that she’d felt last night seems to have escaped her this morning. 

She is not awake enough to deal with this right now. She rubs at her eyes and blinks hard, clearing her throat, but still sounding hoarse when she says, “Good morning.”

“You’re cute all sleepy,” Christen replies. 

It’s like she’s surprised herself by saying that. Her cheeks flush a bright red, and she turns her head to bury it in the pillow. 

That’s all it takes. That’s all Tobin needs to feel her boldness return. She’s still not that awake. She still feels sleep clinging to the corners of her mind and impeding clear thinking. It’s a dangerous combination with the boldness, and maybe that’s why she reaches out and puts her fingers under Christen’s chin. Maybe that’s why she guides Christen’s face to look at her again. 

Christen’s eyes stay down, though, looking at her arm instead of her face, so Tobin says, “Pretty sure you’re the cute one,” and when Christen’s eyes do come up to meet hers, she’s smiling. 

“Good morning,” Christen breathes, voice barely above a whisper. 

_ Just go for it! Just kiss her! _

Christen’s eyes are so green, bright in morning light, her skin is smooth, her hair soft, and her lips...God, her lips are so inviting. 

“Chris?” Tobin says, her voice husky, her fingers still lingering under Christen’s chin.

“Yeah?” Christen asks, and her breath seems a little shallow, her voice catching in her throat, her eyes locked on Tobin’s. 

She does it. She can’t stop herself anymore. She likes her so much. She WANTS her so much. Too much, maybe. 

She presses her lips to Christen’s, absorbing the small gasp that escapes her lips, pressing firmly, but chastely in. She pulls away before she can let herself get carried away, but Christen follows her, kissing her again, deeper, more intensely. Tobin can’t help her slight squeak of surprise, or the way she wraps her arm around Christen to hold her closer, or her moan when Christen’s tongue slides against her lips. 

And then just like that Christen is pulling away and biting at her lip and looking up at her through long lashes. 

Tobin takes a shaky breath in and holds it before letting it out slowly. There’s something about the moment that feels like too much. It makes Tobin feel shy. 

“Sorry, I probably have morning breath,” she murmurs, covering her mouth and pulling her legs away from Christen’s.

“No. I mean, you’re fine. I mean I probably do, too. Sorry.”

She’s so cute and adorable and she looks so self-conscious in a way that Tobin hasn’t seen before that it takes the edge off of Tobin’s nerves, just a little. “No. You’re good. You’re-” She swallows down the word “perfect”. “You’re fine, too.” 

Tobin sits up and Christen does the same, both of them swinging their legs over opposite sides of the bed, and Tobin throws a shy look over her shoulder once she’s put her glasses on only to find Christen watching her with her mouth parted as if she’s debating saying something. 

“Coffee?” Tobin suggests. 

Christen nods gratefully. 

“I’ll go make some. Help yourself to any of my clothes you think will fit.” 

“Thanks,” Christen mumbles. 

Tobin hurries out of the room and doesn’t think about how Christen Press, the woman she’s been pining over, the woman she’s just kissed, is about to be naked in her bedroom. 

  
  


Breakfast is full of shy smiles and awkward conversations, but neither of them mention the kiss. It’s almost like it never happened, except for Tobin can still feel the lingering pressure in her lips, the tingling through her body, the way her heart rate rises anytime they make eye contact. 

“So we’ll pick up the pictures on the way, and then we should be good to get there early enough that we can look through them before the team descends upon us.”

“What about our pictures?” Christen asks suddenly and it takes Tobin by surprise. 

“Our pictures?” Tobin frowns. 

“The team’s. The calendar ones I mean. Have you- Have you been able to find time to edit them?”

“Oh, yes. Almost done. I was going to give the folder one more lookover tonight, but I was going to tell Megan whenever you guys want to come see the proofs is good with me today at practice actually.”

“Can I see mine?” Christen asks, a blush coloring her cheeks. “Are they okay?”

“They’re gorgeous.” Her answer is maybe a little quick. The truth is that she’s looked at Christen’s more than anyone else’s. She hasn’t been able to help it. She’s been trying to keep her eye professional, but holy crap Christen’s curves, her smile, her eyes… “They’re, umm...yeah. Sure. I’ll get them.” 

She’s nervous. She doesn’t know why. They’re pictures OF Christen. It’s not like they’re her nudes. But she feels like this is a critical moment. She flips through the proofs and pulls out the two options she’d chosen for Christen to decide between - the two best in terms of pose, lighting, the perfect balance between revealing and strong. She hands them over, feeling her heart starting to race as Christen’s eyes take them in. 

The seconds tick by agonizingly slowly and Christen says nothing. Tobin scoots to the edge of her seat, trying not to rush her reaction, trying to be patient, trying not to assume the worst. 

Finally Christen looks up, her eyes wide and full of an emotion that Tobin can’t quite read. “They’re gorgeous,” Christen breathes out, almost reverentially. 

Tobin lets out a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. “Yeah?” she asks. 

“Is this how you see me?” Christen asks. 

Tobin’s breath catches in her throat. 

“I mean everyone. Like how you see the world? With the shadows and curves and lines and lighting and just...the beauty?”

Tobin feels a flush on her cheeks and there’s the hint of a blush on Christen’s cheeks, but she fights through it and bites her lip as she nods. “Yes and no. I see what’s there. Sometimes it’s things people miss. Sometimes my subject does all the heavy lifting for me. You- Everyone sees your beauty, Chris.”

Christen’s blush depends and Tobin feels like she’s said too much, especially after their moment in the bedroom, the moment neither of them has mentioned, the moment that Tobin can’t stop replaying in her head over and over. 

“I don’t kno-“

“How mad will Jill be if we bring donuts for the team?” Tobin interrupts. 

Christen looks confused for a moment, but then goes with the conversation redirect. “It’s not Jill who will be mad. It’s Dawn. She might uninvite you from photographing camp,” Christen teases.

At least, Tobin is fairly certain she’s joking. “Okay. Donuts another day. Got it,” Tobin replies. “Well, we should probably head out to get the pictures.” She takes the proofs from Christen a little hurriedly, but falling short of actually snatching them away, and puts them back in the folder. “Make sure I talk to Pinoe later about the pictures?”

“Yeah of course. If everyone’s look like that, they’ll be ecstatic.”

They don’t, Tobin knows. It’s not that the others are bad, but there’s something about Christen’s shots that are downright magical. She doesn’t say it, though. She doesn’t mention how it’s possible that it was just because she was smitten upon first sight. She pushes it away and she murmurs, “Thanks,” and she reminds herself that she has to be professional for three more days. 

  
  


They don’t talk in the car. Not really. Tobin pretends to be super focussed on the road and the traffic instead of the beautiful woman sitting beside her, instead of replaying the kiss over and over in her head, instead of thinking up and discarding a dozen different ways to bring up the kiss. 

Tobin lets Christen go in to pick up the photos by herself after Christen insists she’ll only be a minute anyway. Tobin takes a few moments to breathe deeply and try to center herself. She has a job to do today. She can’t keep thinking about the kiss. She can’t keep thinking about how they haven’t talked about it. She can’t keep thinking about how the longer it goes without them mentioning it or acknowledging it the more it feels like maybe it was a mistake. She has to get out of her own head and be there for the team. 

“Okay, ready to see my insane photography skills?” Christen asks with a grin as she climbs back into the car. 

Tobin grins back. She can’t help it. Christen’s smile is infectious. “Of course. Wow me.”

Christen laughs, and opens up the pictures. She starts to flip through them and Tobin leans over, into her space, breathing her in, feeling the way Christen tilts towards her a bit more so that her shoulder is pressing against Tobin’s chest. 

It’s more than a little distracting, but she tries to focus on the pictures. She laughs at Kelley pulling faces. She points out some great shots of Julie and Crystal laughing together with the lighting hitting them from the side just right. She compliments a shot of Alyssa jumping to tap the ball over the goal. And then she notices it. It’s not so obvious at first, but towards the end of the set of photos it’s more apparent. 

There are a lot of her. 

Laughing, smiling, taking pictures of her own, and one, right near the end, of her looking right at Christen. 

Tobin doesn’t know if Lauren and Amy were right about Christen’s heart eyes in the initial pictures Tobin took of her, but there’s no denying her own heart eyes for Christen in the picture. She swallows hard and glances at Christen, whose eyes are lingering on this picture longer, it seems, than she has previous ones. 

“That’s a pretty good picture of me. I don’t look horrible,” Tobin comments, trying to joke, trying to play it off, hoping against hope that Christen won’t see the heart eyes as obviously as she does. 

“You never look horrible,” Christen replies, but in an absent kind of way, like she has no idea what those words might do to Tobin, like her mind is thinking about something else entirely. 

Tobin’s breath catches in her throat and she tries not to wonder what Christen might be thinking. 

“There’s one more,” she croaks. 

Christen doesn’t react for another full second, and then she flips to the last picture. 

Tobin chokes. She chokes on air because the last picture-

The last picture is a picture of Christen from the waist up taken in a bathroom mirror. The last picture is Christen in a sports bra flexing her abs with an eyebrow raised. The last picture is so fucking hot that it makes Tobin’s brain short circuit and she chokes on air. 

Christen is smirking when she asks, “You okay?”

Tobin nods, catching her breath. “Yep,” she squeaks. “Just choked.”  _ Not for any reason in particular. Definitely not because of your abs. _

“You did say you wanted a picture of my abs,” Christen teases. 

And, God, Tobin had said that hadn’t she? She’d joked it and Christen had joked back and now there’s the picture and all Tobin wants to do is see it in person, is run her fingers down over Christen’s stomach and feel them for herself, all she wants -

But those are not professional thoughts to be having. Not right now. Not when they’re about to head to Providence Park where she’ll have to photograph the entire team and likely endure some teasing from Kelley at the very least. 

(Not now that she knows that Christen’s lips feel like against hers.)

“They’re, um, very nice abs,” Tobin manages. 

Christen smirks a little wider and hands her the picture. “I think maybe you should keep this one,” she says. 

A hundred different thoughts run through her head, but she says none of them. She doesn’t trust her voice right now, and Christen’s eyes are crinkled in amusement and her smirk is doing things to Tobin, and Tobin still needs to drive. “Thanks,” she murmurs. She tucks the picture into her sun visor and then pretends to check her mirrors. She takes a few deep breaths, willing her mind and her heart both to calm. She can feel Christen’s eyes on her, but she wills herself not to react, not to say anything stupid, not to DO something stupid. “Ready?” she asks. 

“When you are,” Christen replies. 

Tobin wonders if she’s just talking about the ride to the stadium. 

  
  


“Hey there, sleepover buddies!” Kelley calls in greeting, and Tobin can feel her cheeks flushing already. “Did you have fun?” 

Christen rolls her eyes. “Yes. Jrue was adorable.”

“Uh-huh, but she didn’t stay the night, did she?” Kelley presses, smirking at Tobin. 

“Lauren picked her up around ten,” Tobin relays. 

“And then what happened?”

She’s fishing. She’s fishing for things that didn’t happen and attempting to sound innocent about it. 

“We watched a movie,” Christen replies. 

“Were people naked in the movie?” Sonny asks, her head popping over Kelley’s shoulder. 

“NO!” Christen and Tobin respond in unison. 

Sonny snickers and Kelley says, “Too bad.”

“I’m going to change,” Christen grumbles, stalking off towards the locker room. 

“Are those Tobin’s clothes?” Ash calls after her. 

Kelley and Ash and Sonny all turn expectantly to Tobin who sighs. “She needed something to wear. My clothes fit.”

“Uh-huh. Yep. So tell me,” Kelley says, throwing an arm around Tobin, “was there cuddling during the movie?”

“Yeah, did you finally make a move, Toby?” Sonny chimes in. 

Tobin groans. “You’re all insufferable, do you know that?” 

“That’s not a no,” Ash points out. 

“What’s not a no?” Pinoe asks, joining the group. 

“Tobin isn’t saying no to her and Christen cuddling during a movie last night or finally making a move,” Sonny supplies. 

“Oooh, so there WAS cuddling?”

Tobin groans and covers her face. She knows her blush is going to give her away and she wishes she could control it, but she feels it burning across her cheeks anyway. “We watched a movie and shared a blanket. It was not a big deal,” Tobin replies. 

There is NO way she’s telling them about the kiss. 

“Blanket sharing is a yes to cuddling,” Pinoe declares. 

“Cozy,” Kelley replies. “So tell me, Miss Heath. What exactly are your intentions with our little Pressy?”

Tobin groans again. “You know she’d kick your butt if she heard you asking that.”

Kelley laughs. “She’d try. She’d have to catch me first.”

“I’ve seen her zoom, Kel. I think she’d do it,” Tobin retorts. 

“Ooof, mean. But I see what you’re doing here. You’re trying to redirect the conversation. Not gonna work, mi amiga.”

“Yeah, was there more than cuddling?” Ash asks. 

“Like kissing?” Sonny suggests, and Tobin is at least a little relieved that Pinoe elbows her for the comment with a muttered, “That was implied. We were being subtler than that, Son,” if for no other reason than that Sonny’s yelp of pain distracts everyone from Tobin’s initial reaction. 

“Yes,” Tobin manages to reply once the attention has shifted back to her. 

“Oooooh,” Kelley starts, but Tobin cuts her off. 

“There was more than cuddling. There was also sleeping. It was super eventful. I think I rolled over at one point. Might’ve been a hint of snoring-”

There’s a collective groan of disappointment and Ash gets handed some money by Kelley and Sonny. 

“Told you they were too busy dancing around the flirting to take it anywhere,” Ash says. 

Tobin stops dead and turns on them. “You were betting on us??” she demands, her cheeks flushing again. 

The three of them have the decency to look mildly embarrassed. Pinoe just laughs. 

“We’re not- It’s not- It’s just a little fun flirting. It’s not- She doesn’t have feelings- You’re all reading too much into this!” Tobin lies. 

At least she’s lying on her behalf. She hopes it’s a lie on Christen’s, too, but honestly it’s nobody’s business but their own that they kissed this morning. 

With the way that they’re continuing to avoid the subject, she’s not even sure it’s their business. They don’t need Christen’s teammates sticking their nose in it. 

“Okay! Calm down! Sorry!” Sonny mutters, looking both taken aback and a little ashamed. 

Tobin nods her acceptance of the apology then turns to Pinoe. “Hey, um, I wanted to talk to you today about the proofs. I’m all ready for you all to come over and pick which ones you want me to send off to the publishers. Maybe we can talk after practice about a good time?”

Pinoe looks mildly surprised by the abrupt change in subject from personal to business, but rolls with it, much to Tobin’s relief. “Yeah. Sure. Sounds good.”

“Great. Now don’t you all have a practice to get ready for?”

Pinoe smirks and Kelley laughs, patting her on the back. Only Sonny still looks like a scolded childs as she shuffles off to the locker room. 

Ash lingers behind. “I know they can be a bit much. Oh, Hell, we can all be a bit much. Here’s the thing: we like you. You’re chill. Almost feels like we’ve adopted you as the 24th woman on the team, you get me? And we LOVE Pressy. She’s family. We just want what’s best for both of you. You feel me?”

Tobin nods. “Yeah, just- Whatever you think is happening there...I don’t know that it is.”

Ash grins. “You don’t know isn’t the same as you don’t think that it is. I’ll take it!” With that, she practically hops off to the locker room, leaving Tobin standing there, regretting her choice in words. 

“Wait! That’s not what I-” she sighs heavily as her voice echoes back at her. “...meant,” she mumbles. 

She leans back against the hallway and closes her eyes. 

She tells herself not to replay the kiss from this morning in her head. 

She ignores her own advice. 


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen tries to mentally prepare to leave Portland (and Tobin) behind and the team gets a look at their nude photoshoot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please try to stick with this. AND PLEASE READ THE END NOTES!

“I am SMOKIN’!” Kelley declares. “Pressy look! Look how hot my ass looks in this picture!”

Christen leans back with a laugh as Kelley sticks her picture directly in front of Christen’s face. “It’s a very nice ass, Kel.”

“Right?” Kelley turns and tries to see her own ass then looks back at the picture. “Damn. I’m a catch!” 

Christen laughs again. “Al, come get your girl. She’s becoming obsessed with her own ass!”

“Well, it’s a pretty nice one!” Alex calls back.

“Damn, JJ!” Crystal says, leaning over Julie’s arm to get a better look at her pictures. “Talk about a nice ass!” 

Christen can’t help her natural curiosity. She leans over and looks too. “Zach is a lucky man,” she comments. 

Julie laughs. “Thanks. Let’s see yours.” 

Crystal perks up too and comes around to her other side. “Yeah, girl. Let’s see!”

Christen hesitates. She doesn’t know why. Soon one of the pictures will be on a calendar that anyone anywhere can buy. And these are her teammates. They’ve seen her practically naked in the locker rooms. Half of them were hanging around when the pictures were taken. They’ve stood by her through some of her worst moments. And yet- There’s something about the pictures, something in them- It almost feels like Tobin was able to capture her soul with them. 

She’s being silly, though. She knows she is. So she forces a smile and shows her pictures. 

Crystal whistles and Julie inhales sharply, and then Kelley is peering over Crystal’s shoulder, and Ash is peering around Julie and Christen feels her cheeks getting hotter and hotter. 

“Damn, Pressy,” Ash finally breathes out. “That’s...Wow!”

“Wow is right! Hey, you think if I flirt with her she’ll make me look that good?” Kelley asks. 

Christen is saved from having to hit Kelley by Crystal elbowing Kelley in the gut. 

“Oof,” Kelley grunts as Crystal says, “No, that’s as good as you get.”

“Heey!” Kelley complains. 

“Weren’t you just saying how hot you looked?” Julie points out. 

“Yeah, but that was before I saw Christen’s professional model shots!”

“The heart eyes shots,” Ash adds. 

“What?” Christen asks, pulling them back and looking at the pictures. And, oh. She hadn’t noticed that the other morning. She had just been struck by how...well, by how beautiful she looked. She’d never seen herself quite that way, but all of the flaws that she always saw in herself in the mirror seemed to have vanished under Tobin’s lens. But there they were, sure enough. Heart eyes. Day one. She barely knew Tobin. They’d barely been introduced. And there she was looking at Tobin with unmistakable heart eyes. 

God, was there any way that Tobin hadn’t noticed? Surely not. She’d spent time pouring over everyone’s pictures. She had to have noticed. That’s why she-

Why they’d-

Christen shook her head. “You’re seeing things,” she says, knowing full well that it’s a lie that her teammates aren’t apt to buy. 

“Sure, Pressy,” Ash says, patting her consolingly. “Keep telling yourself that.”

Christen narrows her eyes at them, but then she catches Tobin’s eyes across the room where she’s animatedly talking to AD, and she feels her breath catch in her throat. 

Her mind instantly goes to the feeling of Tobin’s soft lips pressing against hers, to the needy want she’d felt in the pit of her stomach. Tobin had been going to keep it chaste but then-

Fuck.

Christen hadn’t let her. Christen had chased her. Christen had deepened the kiss. Christen had almost let things go even further. Too far.

Fuck, it was already too far. 

She was LEAVING. 

It wasn’t like she could just hop back to Portland anytime she wanted. She had games and training and other commitments. What little free time she had she wanted to spend with family. She could be Tobin’s friend and nothing more. Friendships she could do long distance. More? No. 

Except that everytime she was with her, every time they were in the same space, Christen seemed to forget. Even now, across a room, her body is betraying her. Her mind is going places it shouldn’t and her body is reacting and-

Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

“You okay, Chris? You look a bit flushed.” There’s a teasing tone to it, but it’s said quietly in her ear and she knows that Kelley is trying to actually be considerate, to check in with her. 

It’s simultaneously annoying and feels like a lifeline, so Christen uses it as the latter.

She’s sure she’ll regret this, but she needs to tell someone or she’s going to explode, and at this point she really can’t talk to Tobin about it. It’s too complicated. They’ve waited too long. 

She puts her proofs carefully down, takes Kelley’s out of her hands and places them with her own, then grabs Kelley’s hand and drags her out of Tobin’s studio and into the hall. 

“Woah! Don’t kill me! I was just checking in!” Kelley is protesting, but Christen covers her mouth with her hand and says, “I kissed her.”

Kelley’s eyes go wide and Christen can feel the smirk forming under her palm. 

She drops her hand to her side and slumps back against the wall, pushing her head back as if maybe if she pushes hard enough the building will just swallow her up and she won’t have to deal with any of this. 

“You actually kissed her???”

“Yes. No. Technically she kissed me first.”

Kelley grins like an idiot. Christen can tell that she’s bursting with responses, probably all of them likely to piss her off, so Christen continues before she gets a chance. 

“It wasn’t a big deal. It was just a small kiss.”

“Was there tongue?”

Christen feels her cheeks heat up. 

“Oh my God, there was!”

Christen rushes forward and puts her hand back over Kelley’s mouth. “We’re not in middle school, O’Hara. Pull it together.”

“I’m sorry,” Kelley mumbles into Christen’s hand. 

When Christen doesn’t immediately pull it away, Kelley licks it, and Christen snatches her hand away quickly then. “Gross,” she mutters as she wipes it on her pants. 

“I’m sorry, I’m just happy that you two are finally headed in the right direction!” 

“We’re not!” Christen retorts, her voice too loud in the hallway. “We’re not,” she repeats more quietly. “We- We kissed and then we didn’t talk about it.”

Kelley frowns. “You’re kidding me.”

“No. Look we shouldn’t even have kissed! It was just- She was so cute. Kel, she was SO cute. First thing in the morning? All sleepy-eyed and her voice all husky and drowsy and she was giving me these little smiles and then I stupidly SAID she was cute and then she kissed me and then she tried to stop it quickly and I- I-”

“Wanted more?” Kelley suggests, looking a bit smug. 

Christen glares. “Shut up, O’Hara.”

Kelley holds up her hands appeasingly, but the smirk on her face doesn’t leave. 

“Anyway I kissed her back and then- It was too much. I- It was like if I didn’t stop then then I wasn’t going to-”

Kelley opens her mouth but Christen gives her a warning look and she shuts it again.

“And so I pulled away and then she was talking about morning breath and offering me coffee.”

“Well you do have some pretty awful morning breath sometimes.”

Christen smacks Kelley on the arm. “She was apologizing for her own!”

“Did she have bad morning breath?”

“No! And it was obvious it was just a cover. She was uncomfortable. Which proves she probably didn’t think this through either and-”

“If you try to turn this into some ‘she doesn’t really like me like that’ argument I might actually hit you, Christen,” Kelley cuts her off. 

“But-”

“SHE kissed YOU. She has flirted with you and been unable to take her eyes off of you and got you a disposable camera and invited you over to help her babysit and LET YOU SHARE HER BED WHERE SHE KISSED YOU! I don’t know what part of that screams, ‘she doesn’t have feelings for you’ to you, but you’re wrong. Okay? Look, I see it. The whole team sees it, Chris. The only one who doesn’t is you and that’s only because you’re trying not to.”

Christen is quiet for a long moment, letting Kelley’s words sink in. She swallows thickly, feeling emotions well up in her throat, pulling tight across her chest. She doesn’t like to run away from her emotions, but this- 

“Even if you’re right-”

“I am.”

“But we’re still leaving in a few days, Kel.”

“Yeah. We are,” Kelley agrees. “But why should that stop you? You two really seem to like each other, Chris. Just- Talk to her! Long distance sucks, but- Sometimes it’s worth it.”

“But to start knowing all it will be is long distance-”

“For now-”

“Unless I get traded to Portland, but I’m not going to move for a girl, Kelley!”

“You’re also not allowed to leave me. Sorry. I don’t make the rules. We’re teammates for life.”

Christen snorts, but she can feel a smile tugging at her lips for the first time all conversation. Right up until Kelley says, “But you’re not going to play soccer forever.”

“I mean hopefully for a good few years yet!” Christen retorts. “And by that point- I can’t START a relationship already planning several years down the road with someone. That’s stupid. We probably wouldn’t even make it that far. We-”

“Will never know if you don’t try.”

Christen hates that Kelley might have a point. Maybe. Sort of. It’s still ridiculous. It’s still a bad idea. 

“Just think about it, Chris,” Kelley advises. 

“There you two are! Tobs wants our opinions!” Ali declares as she bursts into the hallway. “Come on!”

Kelley gives Christen a knowing look, then follows Ali back inside. 

Christen lingers a moment longer. Already the idea of saying goodbye to Tobin feels horrible. If they- If she- 

She’ll only be opening herself up to more hurt. The closer they are, the more painful goodbye will be, and the goodbye is an inevitability that is fast approaching. 

“Friends,” she tells herself. “Just friends. That’s what I can handle.” 

With that she takes a deep breath and heads back inside. 

  
  


There’s a melancholy feeling to the last day of camp. Not just for her. For everyone. At first she thinks she’s imagining it. Today marks more than just the last day of camp, the day before she’ll say goodbye to a lot of her closest friends for a while. Today marks the day before she says goodbye to Tobin, and Tobin’s last day photographing the team. It feels like a lot. 

It feels like a lot with the way that people keep going up to Tobin and saying how much they’ve enjoyed having her there, how they can’t wait to see the photos she took, how she totally needs to come to games - they’ll make sure she gets in. 

It feels like a lot with the way that Tobin keeps shooting her these shy smiles that make her heart flutter. Smiles that remind her that they still haven’t talked about the kiss. Smiles that remind her that she won’t get to see that smile again for a while after tomorrow. 

It feels like a lot with the way that Kelley keeps shooting her pointed looks. Looks that let her know, in no uncertain terms, exactly what Kelley thinks about all of this. And she knows. SHE KNOWS. 

She’s run out of time. 

And she’s not ready for goodbye, but she doesn’t think she’s ready to do what’s necessary for this to not be goodbye either. 

(That does nothing to tamper the ache in her chest when AD and Sonny and Lindsey all make plans to get coffee with Tobin and have her photograph some Thorns games from the sidelines. It does nothing to lessen the pure envy at the reminder that some of her teammates won’t have to say goodbye at all.)

  
  


It’s the lingering goodbyes that make Christen have to fight the pricking of tears behind her eyes. It’s not even like this is goodbye for her yet. There’s still brunch tomorrow. (Brunch that Christen kind of wishes was just going to be her and Tobin without her friends.) 

But everyone else is saying goodbye now. 

Allie holds Tobin close and they call each other Harry (which Christen still doesn’t understand) and it makes something twinge in Christen’s chest. 

Ash and Ali pull Tobin into a group hug and whisper things in her ear that have Tobin looking emotional and Christen has to avert her gaze to keep her own emotions in check. 

Pinoe kicks a ball at her and cheers when she immediately kicks it up in the air then begins to juggle it, then runs over and gives her a hug as soon as Tobin kicks the ball off towards goal. 

One by one everyone says their goodbyes until only Kelley and Christen are waiting their turns. 

Kelley wraps Tobin up tightly in her arms and lifts her of her feet so that Tobin’s laughing, even though Christen can see the hint of tears in her eyes, and then she sets her down and whispers something in her ear that Christen can’t make out, and then she’s saying, “I expect to see you at any Royals vs. Thorns game in Providence Park this year! And you’d better root for the right team.”

“Oh, the Thorns, you mean?” Tobin teases with a grin, and then she yelps when Kelley pinches her in the side. 

“Excuse you. The Royals are obviously the best team in the league.” 

“I don’t feel like their record shows that…” Tobin dances away before Kelley can pinch her again. 

“You’ll see, Tobito! I’m going to make you a fan. It’s going to happen. Besides, the Royals have your two favorite players in the league!” Kelley declares, throwing her arm around Christen’s shoulder and beaming at Tobin. 

And then Tobin’s eyes come to rest on Christen, and she feels like all of the air is pushed out of her lungs. She expects maybe a bit of sadness in Tobin’s beautiful brown eyes. She expects the normal kindness in her gaze. She doesn’t expect the flickering of hope she sees there. There’s so much pressure on her chest she’s not sure she’ll ever be able to take a proper breath again, but then Kelley is shoving Christen towards Tobin, who’s smiling at her and saying, “Guess I’ll give you a hug, too, but I’ll see you tomorrow still, right?”

Christen wants to say no. She wants to cut this short. To have the goodbye be now instead of postponed until she falls even deeper, until she has even more of a chance to blurt something out that will only cause more pain for both of them in the long run. Instead she steps into the offered hug and nods into Tobin’s shoulder. “Yeah. Of course. Wouldn’t miss it.”

And then she’s stepping away and looking around and realizing that suddenly everyone is looking somewhere else, everyone has moved away. Everyone has given them space. 

And it’s too much. 

Everything just feels like too much. 

“See you tomorrow,” Christen says, and then she turns and heads to the locker room, grabbing Kelley on the way and calling out, “Anyone else ready to get changed??” over her shoulder, like her heart isn’t hammering in her chest and her throat doesn’t feel constricted and her lungs don’t feel like they may never have enough air again. 

  
  


Brunch is-

Well, it’s a lot more animated than she expected. She expected a similar feel to the last practice, but instead the table is full of laughter and smiles. Instead of timid conversation about future plans the atmosphere is laid back with anecdotes and memories passed around easily. 

Christen finds herself laughing almost nonstop as Amy relays a story about Tobin from high school when they had very narrowly escaped arrest while orchestrating her senior prank of putting the principal’s school on the roof (thanks in part to a friend’s older brother who had access to a crane at work). She lucked out because the officer who responded to the suspicious activity call happened to be none other than Lauren’s dad, and he had simply sighed heavily and sent them all home, driving Tobin personally to her parents’ doorstep. 

She can feel Tobin shaking with laughter beside her, arm slung casually around Christen’s chair, cheeks flushed, eyes bright. 

For a moment Christen gets caught up looking at her and forgets about the story altogether, but then Tobin’s saying, “I don’t think your dad was even surprised, though,” as she laughs, and Lauren says, “No, not at all!” and Christen focuses back on the conversation. 

It turns to her soon enough, as they sip mimosas, and she sees Lauren giving her a knowing look while Amy straightens a little, her eyes focusing on the way that Tobin can’t seem to stop leaning in towards Christen (and Christen is trying to help the way that she leans towards her in return, but it’s so very hard when all she wants to do is keep touching her). 

“So when do you think we’ll be seeing you back in Portland?” Amy asks. 

The sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach hits her so suddenly she wonders momentarily if she’s going to lose her brunch. 

“Oh, um…” Christen shrugs. “Our next game here isn’t for a month, so probably then?” 

She doesn’t miss the look that Amy and Lauren exchange then. It would be impossible to, really. 

“You know you’re allowed to visit before you play here, right?” Lauren suggests, and Christen doesn’t miss the way that Tobin’s body has stiffened beside her. 

She can feel her own muscles tensing. She can feel the way her heart is beating faster and her stomach feels uneasy and she really doesn’t want to think about the fact that now that they’re done eating, now that they’re just kind of hanging out, she’s minutes rather than hours from having to say goodbye to Tobin. 

“My schedule is pretty busy. Trainings and games and travel and then meetings with sponsors, and Pinoe and I have been talking about trying to start a company, and-”

“Hey, Lauren, do you remember that championship game when you had the flu and you still insisted on playing?”

It’s the least subtle subject change in the history of subject changes, but Christen leans into it. 

“Wait, you played a championship game with the flu?”

Amy and Lauren exchange a look, then the glance at Tobin, and in unison they seem to decide that this is, in fact, okay, much to Christen’s relief, because Amy laughs and says, “Only about five minutes until she puked on the sidelines and coach sent her home.”

“He wouldn’t even let me stay and watch the game, which I still think is unfair.”

“Dude, you had a horrible fever. We didn’t see you again for almost two weeks,” Tobin argues.

And just like that, Christen can breathe again. 

For now. 

  
  


She doesn’t want to leave. She has to. She knows she does. She has a flight out in a few hours and Kelley is waiting for her back at the hotel so that they can head to the airport. 

She doesn’t want to leave, but she has to, and she hates the way she can feel it coming, the dread that’s hanging over her. 

She lives such a nomadic life, she’d thought she’d adjusted to saying goodbyes, but this one feels-

It feels different. 

It feels different with the way that Tobin awkwardly walks her to her door. With the way that Amy and Lauren both made excuses about five minutes ago as to why they suddenly couldn’t stay any longer. With the way that Christen is dragging her feet slower with each step. 

And then Tobin is saying, “Oh! Hang on! I almost forgot!” and she’s rushing to her bedroom and reemerging with a gift bag and holding it out. 

She’s already rambling as Christen takes it from her with a slight frown. 

“So, this isn’t as big as it seems because I actually just bought a new camera thanks to you guys hiring me for two weeks, and well, I wanted to encourage you to take more pictures and keep seeing all the beauty and art there is in the world, so I figured there wasn’t really a better home for my old camera, and there’s still a lot of life in it, so, like, yeah…”

And Christen opens the bag and looks down at the camera, the same one she’s seen in Tobin’s hand so many times over the past two weeks, the same one she grabbed the one day at practice and started snapping pictures with, and something in her chest constricts. 

“Tobin,” she chokes out, the tears she’s been fighting spilling down over her cheeks. 

“Hey, no, don’t cry, Chris.” Tobin moves in closer, her thumbs warm on Christen’s cheeks as she wipes the tears away, and Christen closes her eyes and wills them to stop. This isn’t how she wanted to say goodbye to Tobin. 

“It’s just- I thought maybe you’d use it and have some fun with it,” Tobin says, and when Christen does let herself open her eyes, Tobin is right there, in her space, hands cupping her cheeks, smiling at her. “I thought maybe it’d remind you of me. So you’d remember to look me up when you’re back in town,” Tobin adds with a blush. 

And, fuck. 

Why does she have to-

Why is she just so-

Why-

Fuck it. 

Christen throws her arms around Tobin’s neck, on hand still clutching the camera, and kisses her hard. She kisses her like she’s wanted to since the moment Tobin’s lips touched hers the other day. She kisses her like she’s wanted to since she first saw Tobin’s shy smile and adorable blush as she did her best to put her at ease about stripping down to nothing. 

(She kisses her like she doesn’t have to say goodbye to her today.)

And Tobin gasps into the kiss, her hands falling to Christen’s hips, and then she’s kissing her back. 

It’s needy and urgent and so full of emotion, Christen feels like she might explode. She doesn’t want to stop. When Tobin’s tongue swipes against her lips she meets it with her own, she lets the kiss deepen, lets her arms tighten around Tobin, feels the way that Tobin is holding her closer, hands pressing firmer. 

Her skin is on fire as Tobin backs her into the door and she wants-

God, she just wants-

Fucking-

She wants this to go on forever. 

The thought is suffocating. She wants Tobin in a way that she can’t ever remember wanting anyone else. Tobin who is leaning into her, whose body is pressed flush with hers, whose weight is pinning her to the door, whose lips are soft and a little sweet, whose tongue is in her mouth tasting like champagne and orange juice, whose thumbs are rubbing slow circles into her hips in a way that turning her on so fucking much-

Tobin who she has to leave. 

Their situations haven’t changed. 

Tobin lives and works in Portland. Christen doesn’t. 

She still doesn’t have time for a long distance relationship even if that’s what she- 

Even though she’s pretty sure that Tobin would go for that right now, that she’s hoping-

Christen brings her free hand back between them and presses on Tobin’s chest until she’s breaking the kiss and stepping away, brows furrowed, lips a little swollen. 

“I can’t.” Her voice is breaking and her chest feels like it’s being ripped in two, but she moves to the side, putting more space between them, and repeats, “I can’t. Tobin, I’m sorry I just- I don’t have time in my life right now. I’m focused on my career and-”

Tobin’s whole face falls and she takes a step back, her chin dropping to her chest. She bites her lip as she nods. “Oh. Right.”

“Tobin, I want- I wish things were different. I- Tobin, I like you I just-”

“No. Right. It’s fine. I get it. It was stupid. I mean-”

“No!” Fuck. This isn’t how she wanted this to go. She shouldn’t have-

If she had just been able to keep her hands and lips to herself! 

“No. Tobin. Please! It wasn’t stupid. I was stupid. I let myself- Look, I- Here, I can’t take this.” 

The camera feels suddenly so heavy in her hand as she holds it out, but Tobin shakes her head and takes another step back. 

“No. I want you to have it. Please.”

“Tobin-”

“Please,” Tobin repeats, her voice breaking. 

Christen closes her eyes again as a tear burns a trail down her cheek and she brushes angrily at her eyes. This is all her fault. Tobin’s pain, her own stupidity for letting herself fall for someone when she knew, she KNEW that she couldn’t incorporate them into her life right now. 

She fights the urge to hug Tobin, to comfort her. She’s not sure she’d be strong enough to step away if she did. “I’m so sorry, Tobin. I- I’d love to be your friend. To see you next time I’m here. To-”

“Yeah. Yeah, of course,” Tobin mumbles, but she won’t look up, she won’t meet Christen’s gaze, and then she rubs angrily at her eyes, blinking hard. 

“Tobin-”

“Have a safe flight. Tell Kelley goodbye for me, okay? I have- Um, I need to finish cleaning up and get on editing all those pictures I took of you guys so. Sorry, I meant to walk you out, but-”

“No. Yeah. It’s fine. It’s- Good luck with the editing, Tobin.”

“Good luck with soccer, Chris.”

Christen closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, the tears waiting to be shed already making her eyes ache, and then she looks at Tobin again and forces herself to say the word she’s been dreading. “Goodbye, Tobin.”

“Bye, Chris.”

Her legs feel numb as they carry her out of Tobin’s apartment, out of her building, and, in all likelihood, out of her life. 

She regrets everything already. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know right now probably a lot of you are really mad at me. You're wondering why the hell 16 chapters in these two aren't together. But here's the thing: it's been 16 chapters, but only 2 weeks of story time. That's it. They've known each other 2 weeks. They're not in love yet. They haven't known each other long enough. They've barely gotten quality alone time together. And as fun as it would be to say "they're in love now and they live happily ever after" it wouldn't sit well with me for either of them to give up their careers, their normals, to rush into something together (yes I used the word rush about two characters who have only just kissed 16 chapters in). So here's what I'm asking: I'm asking that you stick with this, that you try to trust that I have a plan (and have had a plan even before now) of what I want to happen, that they WILL hit their happily ever at some point, and that Christen's teammates want that for them too. That's my request, but in the end it's your choice if you want to hang in with this fic or not. If you choose not, thank you for reading this far.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin deals with life after the national team leaves town (and mostly she deals with missing Christen).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so I'm kinda stressing about this whole pandemic thing, what with being asthmatic and already having spent my entire 2020 coughing, and being a mom to 3 little kids that I definitely don't want to leave behind. If you feel like distracting me with some kind words about the chapter, that would be very welcome. 
> 
> Also: we're socially distancing, but that means that I'm homeschooling my 6yo which means updates may be even slower, sorry. 
> 
> Thanks to everyone who took the time to tell me they're sticking with it last chapter. It was touching to see that response. 
> 
> I hope you like this chapter and that all of you are staying responsible and healthy. And to any of you who are medical professionals or retail workers and can't stay home right now: wishing you all luck. This chapter is for you guys. xx

It’s not a break up. 

Tobin doesn’t really have any reason to feel as upset as she does. Not really. It wasn’t like she didn’t know that Christen was leaving. It’s not like-

But she’d gotten her hopes up-

And this crush-

It’s so stupid. 

She’d felt like maybe it could be more. 

But that’s all it was. Is. It’s not gone. It’s just-

It’s just a crush. 

  
  


She has lots of photos to edit. Thousands. It’s enough to keep her busy. It’s enough to give her something to focus on other than-

Fuck.

When Christen had kissed her, properly, she’d actually gone weak in the knees. She’d-

It had felt like-

Fuck. 

No. 

Photos. 

Some are easy to discard. Some she’d not gotten the aperture setting right. Some she’d simply missed the moment. Some she’d switched focus too fast. 

Some are in need of minimal editing, some a little more.

Some are perfect as is. 

It’s easier to focus on the edits for now, on actually doing something specific. She plays with the sharpness, with the colors, with black and white. She changes settings until each shot looks exactly the way she wants it, and then she still has thousands. 

Paring down to the absolute best shots takes more time, and at the end of her third day she realizes that part of the problem, maybe the biggest problem, is that every single picture of Christen is gorgeous. She doesn’t want to exclude any of them. 

She also doesn’t want to focus on any of them too hard. She has a job to do, though, and so she starts sorting through, finding ones where the lighting isn’t as good, where the shadows are a little too intense, the framing isn’t just right, anything to keep herself from getting lost in Christen’s toned legs, muscular thighs, high cheekbones, brilliant smile, and stunning eyes. Anything to keep herself from getting lost in thoughts of the woman herself. 

  
  


** _[Kelley O’Hara 8:45 p.m.]_ ** _ Sup photo genius? You free? _

Tobin frowns. She didn’t really expect to hear from anyone on the team. Not this soon anyway. She had told them it would be a while before she’d have the pictures ready. 

** _[Tobito 8:46 p.m.]_ ** _ Just editing your photos. _

Her phone rings a second later and she should probably be a little more surprised than she is that it’s Kelley. 

“Hey,” she greets her. 

“What happened with Pressy?”

The words feel like a smack in the face, and it takes Tobin a second to recover. Just hearing her name, or nickname, rather, makes her heart stutter in her chest. “What do you mean?”

“I mean why has she been on the verge of tears since brunch with you and your friends and WHY have you two not been texting regularly?”

Something pangs in her chest. She’s been sad? She’s been close to crying? But, no. It was her decision to make. Tobin had been willing-

She’d wanted-

“Why don’t you ask her?” Tobin suggests. 

“She told me to mind my own business,” Kelley replies. “And then the second time she used more colorful language that I won’t repeat.”

Tobin snorts. She can’t help herself. She can picture it, can hear Christen’s voice, can see Kelley’s offended face. “Well, then, it sounds like you have your answer.”

“No, I have no answer. But you’re going to give me one,” Kelley counters. 

“Why’s that?” 

“Because I can help you.”

Tobin closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She’s got an idea of where this conversation might be headed, but with Kelley, she’s learned, it’s better not to assume. “Help me what, exactly?”

“Win Pressy’s heart, obviously.”

She can’t stop the sharp inhale of breath, or the way her heart races in her chest, and Kelley must hear the former because she says, “What?”

“She made it pretty clear she doesn’t want to give it to me,” Tobin blurts. 

She hasn’t even told Lauren and Amy about it. Not yet. She’s thrown herself into work. 

And Kelley is probably the last person she should be telling. Kelley who’s proven that she likes to meddle, that she’ll tease relentlessly. 

Kelley who isn’t responding. 

Finally, after a pause that drags on far too long, Kelley says, “What?” It’s a very different tone from the way she’d asked it moments before, a little shrill, full of surprise. “She did what? How?”

“She...She said she didn’t have the time right now. That she only wanted to be my friend.” Tobin hates the way she chokes up, hates the way her voice cracks and her throat feels thick, hates the ache in her chest at the words. She can still hear Christen’s voice saying them echoing in her head. 

She hears Kelley let out a deep breath. 

“She’s an idiot.”

“She’s not. She had her reasons.”

“They’re stupid reasons,” Kelley grumbles. 

“Kelley-” Tobin sighs. She doesn’t have the energy to defend Christen while nursing her own hurt, but Christen is anything but stupid. 

“You doing okay?” Kelley asks, her voice laced with concern. 

“Yeah,” Tobin replies automatically. 

“Really?” Kelley persists. 

And maybe it’s because Kelley bothered to call in the first place, maybe it’s because Kelley is now the only other person who knows, or maybe it’s just the level of genuine concern in her voice, but Tobin sighs and says, “I don’t know. I’m keeping busy so that I don’t have to think about the fact that it hurts. And- I WANT to be her friend, but thinking about her makes me-” She sighs again. “It makes me want.”

There’s a pause and then Kelley says, “Yeah. I get it.”

“Is it stupid that I miss her?”

“No. And she definitely misses you. She’s just- Pressy is stubborn. It’s part of what makes her such a great athlete. She has this focus and she’s so stubborn about it, pushing herself, but sometimes she gets tunnel vision and-” Kelley cuts herself off. “Did I ever tell you how Alex and I got together?”

The abrupt change of subject throws Tobin for a second, but then she says, “No.”

“Okay, so, Al was with this guy, nice guy. Good guy. They’d been dating since college. And I had like an instant crush, right?”

“On the guy?”

“Tobito, keep up. Instant crush on Alex.” 

“Okay…”

“But she had a boyfriend. And everyone, including her, thought she was straight.”

“But now you’re dating, so obviously not,” Tobin points out. 

“Quit interrupting!”

“Sorry,” Tobin mumbles, flicking through a few more pictures on her screen as she listens to give her hands something to do. 

“Okay, so anyway, obviously I was my usual charming self around her-”

Tobin snorts, but Kelley ignores it. 

“And then I started to flirt, and before I knew it she was flirting back a bit, but she still had this boyfriend and we played for different club teams, so it just didn’t really seem like a thing that was going to work out.”

Kelley pauses and Tobin waits for her to continue.

“Are you listening?”

“You told me not to interrupt!”

“Yeah, but the occasional ‘mhm’ so that I know you’re actually listening wouldn’t be out of place,” Kelley argues. 

Tobin rolls her eyes and dutifully hums, “mhm.”

“Better. Thank you. Anyway, you’ll probably be surprised to learn that I’m not actually great at emotions-”

“Shocking,” Tobin deadpans. 

“TOBIN!”

“Sorry, go on.”

“Thank you. Anyway, nothing happened except me having a crush-”

“Pining,” Tobin corrects. 

“HAVING A CRUSH,” Kelley repeats, “and some mild flirting for like a year and a half, but Ash and Ali and Pinoe and Allie-”

“You said Ali already.”

“Ali Krieger AND Allie Long.”

“Oh, you mean Harry-”

“Seriously what is with you two and the Harry thing??? You know what? Nevermind. On with my riveting story that you are being a bad listener for: they all kept encouraging me to be open with my feelings and take a chance on love and then I finally told Alex how I felt and you know what happened?”

“You lived happily ever after annoying other people about their non-relationships?” Tobin suggests, flicking quickly past a picture of Christen. 

“No! She freaked out and told me she was straight and barely talked to me for the rest of camp.”

“This is super motivating to get me to pursue things with Christen. You’re doing a great job.”

“Shut up. Anyway, THEN she called me like a month later and apologized for freaking out and said that she and her boyfriend had broken up and I was still feeling dejected so I said, ‘So what?’, and she’s a little stubborn so she said, ‘Just thought you’d want to know,’ and I said, ‘Well, I don’t,’ and she said, ‘Oh,’ and-”

“Jesus! How DID you two actually end up together?” 

“We finally talked at the next camp. Properly. Laying out what we wanted, what our hopes were, and then she kissed me.”

“So you’re preaching communication.”

“Yes. Also not being stubborn.”

“I shot my shot, Kel.”

“Shoot it again.”

“She’s kind of far away,” Tobin points out with a sigh. 

“Long distance is a thing,” Kelley counters.

“Yeah. A part of the problem thing.”

Kelley sighs. “Well then take a little bit and see if friends is a thing you can do.”

As if on cue the next picture is another one of Christen - her kind eyes, her bright smile, that particular way she holds her hands when she’s talking, the wave of her hair. 

“Okay, I can see you’re not swayed, so let me ask you one really important question, because maybe I really have been reading this wrong all along.”

“What?” Tobin asks. 

“Do you want her in your life? Doesn’t matter what capacity. Just in your life at all.”

Tobins eyes trace over Christen’s face. She can practically hear the melodic ring of her laughter echoing around her studio. The ache in her chest grows stronger, but she’s not running from it, not right now. “Yes. I do.”

“Then take a little time, and make sure she’s part of it.”

“And if she doesn’t want to be a part of my life?”

“Trust me, she does. And if you think I’m not going to have words with her you’re very wrong.”

“You realize that she’s going to kill me for telling you,” Tobin points out. 

“She’ll get over it. Just remember to thank me at your wedding.”

Tobin’s eyes go wide and she feels her heart race just at the joking suggestion. “Kelley we’re not-”

“Okay, gotta go Tobito! Be good! Talk soon!”

“Kelley, WAIT! We’re NOT-”

“Byeeeeee!”

And just like that the line goes dead. 

Tobin lets out a long breath and rolls her eyes. “Fucking Kelley O’Hara,” she mutters under her breath. 

But Kelley’s words stick in her head the rest of the day. 

And the next day. 

And by the time she texts Lauren and Amy that she needs a girl’s night, she’s already made up her mind. 

She wants Christen in her life. 

  
  


“You could move to Utah,” Lauren suggests. 

“Um, no you could not. You are not allowed to move so far away,” Amy counters.

“If it’s for love,” Lauren says. 

“It’s not love. It’s...like,” Tobin corrects quickly. 

Both of her best friends ignore her. 

“It doesn’t matter if it’s for love, we love her too, and I am not okay with her moving to Utah. Besides, isn’t Utah a dry state?”

“Actually no,” Tobin replies.

“And we need her for soccer,” Amy continues as if Tobin hadn’t spoken at all. “She’s our top scorer. She can’t leave. What if we lose?”

“You know that Tobin finding happiness in life is maybe more important than our record, right?” Lauren counters. 

“Says who?” Amy argues. 

“GUYS!”

Amy and Lauren both finally turn to her. 

“I’m not moving to Utah.”

“Ha!” Amy declares triumphantly. 

“But...I need to figure out what to say. Or- How I can be her friend, I guess.”

“Sweetie, you don’t want to just be her friend,” Lauren says, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, and Tobin can’t help but lean into the comfort it offers. 

Lauren’s right, but right now it seems like her only option. “I want to be her something and her friend is better than nothing,” Tobin counters. 

“So how about, ‘Hey? How’s it going?’?” Lauren proposes. 

“Lame,” Tobin replies. 

“Oooooh, maybe she could move to Portland?” Amy suggests. 

“How about realistic options?” Tobin counters. 

“I think that anything that comes from us won’t sound nearly as good as something that comes from you, Tobs,” Lauren advises. 

“She’s right,” Amy agrees. 

Tobin groans and snuggles in closer to Lauren. “Why do relationships suck?”

“They don’t always, but they ARE work. Even the good ones involve quality, consistent communication,” Lauren replies, kissing her on the top of the head. 

Tobin sighs. “Can I have more wine?”

“Always,” Amy assures her, taking her glass. “THAT we can help with.”

  
  


Tobin watches the Royals play Sky Blue on her computer. Somehow knowing that Christen is all the way in New Jersey makes her miss her even more, even though she can see her on her screen. 

She’s smiling and vibrant and so fucking fast. Somehow she looks even faster on the screen than she had been in person. 

Tobin can pick her out easily on the field. Nobody holds herself quite like Christen. Nobody runs quite like her. And when Christen scores in the 21st minute, Tobin can’t help but jump to her feet and cheer. 

She knows she could be watching Kelley or Becky, and she does when they are zoomed in on on her screen, but she can’t take her eyes off of Christen whenever she’s visible. 

Utah pulls off a 2-0 victory against Sky Blue and Tobin’s not sure she’s ever been happier to see a team win. 

It’s silly. 

They’re not even HER team. 

She’s a Thorns fan!

Except maybe now she’s a Royals fan too. 

Before she can think better of it she pulls out her phone and opens up a new text. 

** _[Tobin 5:30 p.m.]_ ** _ Awesome game! Congrats on the win and the goal! _

She locks her phone and puts it on the table. She busies herself with making dinner. She cleans up afterwards, then reads for a bit. 

She keeps her phone purposefully at a distance. 

It’s not until just before bed that she picks it up and sees a message waiting for her. 

** _[Christen 7:54 p.m.]_ ** _ Thanks :) _

It’s not a lot, but it’s a start. 

  
  


“Do you have a job next week?”

Tobin frowns. “I mean, I’m a photographer, so technically yes, I’m employed,” Tobin replies. When Ash had called, she’d assumed it had had something to do with the first batch of pictures she’d posted in the training album the night before. She’d emailed the link to everyone on the team and already heard back from a few of them complimenting the pictures or declaring they needed blown up prints of some. 

“Okay, but what I meant was do you have any bookings next week? Like are you photographing anyone?”

“Oh, um, no. I was going to edit some more of your pictures. Technically I only finished week one.” 

“Okay, well, Ali and I need you to do an engagement shoot for us.”

Tobin hesitates. “You know you guys live in Orlando, right? Are you playing in Portland next week?”

“Nope! We’re flying you here, biiitch!”

Tobin’s jaw falls open. “What?”

“We need a photographer with discretion and skills and you’re it, chica! So get that cute little ass on a plane and come see us!”

“You know a local photographer would probably be way cheaper than flying me to Orlando and back, right?” 

Ash sighs. “Yes, obviously, but we LIKE you. This gives us an excuse to see you again AND to get some damn good pictures. It’s worth the price.”

“You’re crazy,” Tobin replies through a laugh. 

“The best kind of crazy though,” Ash counters. “Ali’s texting you flight options now! See you next week, Tobito!”

  
  


Tobin’s not entirely sure why she’s nervous. She loves to travel. Flying has always been exciting, and she hasn’t been to Orlando since she was a little kid and that was just to go to Disney World with her family. 

And it’s not like she doesn’t know how to do an engagement shoot. She’s done dozens and half of them also hired her to do their wedding photography, so it’s not like she doesn’t know what she’s getting herself into. 

The point is that there is no reason for her to be nervous. 

Yet she is. She can feel the nerves increasing the closer the plane gets to Orlando. By the time she’s checked into the hotel that Ali and Ash had booked for her, her whole body feels like it’s practically buzzing with anticipation. 

Maybe she’s just excited to see Ali and Ash again. It’s been a few weeks since she’s seen her new National Team friends in person, and after seeing them every day for two weeks straight, that feels like a lot. It’s strange for her, now, to think about them not being in her life in some way or another now after being so intensely in with the team for a stretch. 

Except that by the time she’s in the Uber heading to the address that Ali and Ash had sent her, she’s a little nauseous, too, and honestly, she doesn’t understand it. Ali and Ash might have been a little nosy at times about her interest in Christen, but they’d also been nothing but friendly and supportive. Plus they had just filled her schedule for this week with both travel and work, which was really pretty cool. 

Her heart is racing as she raises her hand to ring the doorbell, her equipment bag slung over her shoulder, snapback on to shade her eyes from the bright Florida sunshine. 

“Hey! You’re here! So great to see you!” Ali greets her enthusiastically, pulling her into a hug that surprises her as soon as she’s pulled the door open.

Tobin feels some of her anxiety melt away at the effusive greeting, and she’s laughing as she lets Ali lead her into her home. 

It’s once she’s standing in the living room, her sliders toed off by the door, feet feeling the cool floor beneath them, and she sees who Ash is sitting next to on the couch, talking animatedly with, that all of the anxiety floods back in and she stops in her tracks. 

“Oh, hey! Tobin! You’re here! Great!”

And then Christen’s beautiful green eyes, open wide, are looking straight at her, surprise etched on her features, and Tobin feels her mouth go dry. “Hey,” she offers in a quiet voice that does nothing to hide her confusion. 

“Hi,” Tobin replies. “Am I- Is this the right time? Do you want me to come back?”

Her heart feels like it’s beating a million times a minute and the fingers gripping the strap of her equipment bag are curled so tightly that her knuckles have gone white, but she can’t bring herself to tear her gaze away from Christen, even as she’s talking to Ali and Ash. 

“Nope! You’re right on time!” Ash assures her. 

“I’ll just head back to the team hotel,” Christen says, scrambling to her feet, but she, too, is cut off. 

“No! Chris, please. You have to stay. How else am I going to get Ash to be reasonable about these pictures?” Ali pleads. “I’m going to need your levelheadedness.”

“I don’t know what you have against the grill,” Ash mumbles. 

Christen looks at Tobin and Tobin can only stare back at her. There’s a flash of something in her face that Tobin can’t read, and then Christen’s nodding with a small smile. “Yeah, okay. Sure. Whatever you need.”

Tobin feels something pulling in her chest, and she closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, but when she opens them again, Christen is still staring straight at her. 

She thinks, maybe, just maybe, that means something. 


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen deals with the emotions that seeing Tobin in Orlando bring up, and maybe some communication happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing is slow-going right now and time feels even more limited despite not having to run my daughter to activities thanks to things like homeschooling and fetching snacks for 3 kids instead of just 2 (which is apparently a full-time job). I did come up with a very rough plan of the next several chapters, though, so that's something. I'll update when I can. I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy. Special thanks to any of my readers who are essential workers in this time.   
xx

She should’ve known that her teammates wouldn’t leave this alone. They’d all been disappointed when it had become clear that Christen wasn’t making a move on Tobin (not that she’d tell them about, anyway), and then when Kelley had found out-

Well, she’d expected to be annoyed, really, but in the end it had been a relief. Kelley hadn’t been as insufferable about it as she’d expected and having SOMEONE to talk to about things had been nice. 

It had been so nice that she hadn’t thought to be suspicious when Ali and Ash had invited her over while she was in town to play them. Really, why would she be? They’re friends, after all. Close friends. Old friends. The type of friend who doesn’t hesitate to meddle. 

And Christen wants to be annoyed now, too. She really does. Because this isn’t their business. Just because they’ve found their happily ever after doesn’t mean she has. So what if there was an instant connection between her and Tobin. That doesn’t mean-

But Tobin’s glancing shyly at her through long lashes. Tobin’s looking at her like maybe them both being here means SOMETHING. 

And despite her offer to, she doesn’t want to leave. She wants to stay. She wants-

Fuck. 

She takes a deep breath. 

“So, shall we get started?” Ash suggests, and Christen can hear the teasing lilt in her voice, but hopes that Tobin doesn’t know her well enough to pick it out. 

Christen can already feel a blush starting in her cheeks, but she forces her gaze away from Tobin toward Ali and Ash as Tobin mumbles, “Um, yeah, sure. Um, maybe we could talk a bit more about what type of a feel you’d like, and then I can get set up?”

“Sure. Put your stuff down and let’s all go have a drink in the kitchen and talk about it. You’ve been traveling a while. You deserve a bit of a sit down,” Ali replies. 

Christen doesn’t look back at Tobin, but Ali’s hand is firm on her wrist as she directs her towards the kitchen as if it isn’t visible, as if she doesn’t know exactly where it is, and she’s not surprised when her friend directs her to a chair that happens to be exactly next to the chair the Ash directs Tobin to. 

She offers Tobin a shy smile, feeling the warmth radiating from her. She’s trying to focus, really she is, as Tobin opens up a portfolio she brought with her of other engagement shoots she’s done and Ali and Ash start to flip through it while Tobin talks, but her mind has other ideas. 

Being so close to Tobin for the first time since their awkward goodbye is flooding her mind with memories. Memories of cuddling on Tobin’s couch in Portland. Memories of lying in her bed, breathing in her scent. Memories of kissing her like she never wanted to stop. That one above the others is hard to shake, and she feels heat running through her body. Her fingers brush her lips as she remembers exactly how Tobin’s had felt against them, and she can’t stop the regular glances at Tobin. 

But Tobin is all business, her focus on Ali and Ash, on explaining the concept behind certain pictures, on taking in the spaces that are available, on suggesting certain props, certain looks. It’s-

It’s a little disappointing. Whatever effect Tobin is having on her it seems the feeling is not mutual, and that-

Well, that’s proof, really, that whatever they had in Portland wasn’t meant to last. 

“What do you think, Chris?” Ash asks, a smirk on her face. 

“Hmm?” Christen asks, feeling her cheeks flush in embarrassment at being caught not paying attention. 

“Outside shots, some with the dogs,” Ash explains. 

“Oh. Yeah. Very you.”

“Ooooh! What about some nighttime shots with like blacklights and glow sticks?” Ash suggests. 

Ali and Christen look at each other, and they both turn to Tobin. 

Tobin’s brows are furrowed, and she says, “The lighting would be difficult,” slowly, as if she’s actually considering it. 

“No,” Christen and Ali declare at the same time. 

“Something classic and timeless,” Christen elaborates. 

“But we’ll still make it us, baby,” Ali adds, leaning in to Ash and placing a quick kiss on her lips. 

“For sure,” Tobin encourages, but Christen doesn’t miss the way that she averts her eyes from the kiss, the way she scoots a little further away from her. 

Christen sits up a little straighter and pushes all thoughts of kisses from her mind. Tobin isn’t here for kisses or flirting or even to talk things over with her. She hadn’t even known she was going to be there. This is just work, and Christen is just there to help. 

It’s fine.

Everything’s fine. 

“Okay, well, let’s get started.”

  
  


“Go talk to her,” Ali urges. 

“I thought I was here to help. Helping you choose a wardrobe IS helping.”

“Yeah, so is helping our photographer get set up. Don’t make her set up the lights and stuff by herself,” Ali counters. 

“I thought you needed me to balance Ash,” Christen argues. 

“I don’t need balancing. Our photos need to be us, that means I need to be me,” Ash points out. 

“You know you’re here to see her,” Ali adds. 

“Yeah, you’re all about as subtle as Kelley,” Christen grumbles. 

“Hey!” Ash protests. 

“Look, she doesn’t even seem all that happy to see me!” 

“Maybe you should go talk to her without an audience and find out,” Ash urges. “Come on, girl! Get your cute little ass out of here and go chat to your girl!”

“She’s not my-”

Ash cuts her off with an actual little shove. “Shoo. Don’t want you staring at my tits when I change. Go on. Go!”

Christen rolls her eyes, but she knows her friends. They’re pushy, especially if they think they have her best interest at heart. Besides, Tobin can always send her away if she doesn’t want the help. 

“Shoo!” Ash waves her away again, and Christen sighs. 

“Fine! But I’m leaving if she doesn’t need help!”

  
  


“Get it together, Tobin.”

Christen’s sure she’s not meant to have overheard that, but she can’t help but smile. Tobin is absolutely adorable as she struggles with setting up a light near the loveseat that she’s already draped a silky-looking blanket over. Her movements are too sharp, too quick, and Christen can see the tension in her shoulders. 

“Talk to yourself often?” She can’t help the teasing. Can’t help wanting to see if she can make Tobin smile. Even if this isn’t going anywhere. Even if she blew the chance she was given. 

Tobin jumps, and when she turns to face Christen, she looks sheepish and there’s a faint blush on her cheeks. 

“Well, I can be a pretty good conversationalist, so…” There’s the hint of a smile she’s biting back and it’s just so-

Easy. 

That’s how things have felt with Tobin from the beginning. Like she can just TALK to her, just BE with her. 

But she can’t.

How is it possible that something feels so easy and so hard at the same time? That being with someone can feel so right when the timing is just so wrong? 

“Do you need any help?” Christen asks, gesturing to the large equipment bag. 

“Um…” 

Christen can see the hesitation in her face, can see the way her eyes flit over her, the way her cheeks color a darker shade of pink. She’s about to say nevermind, about to say she’ll just go. 

“Yeah. Thanks,” Tobin manages with a smile. 

Christen lets Tobin direct her, lets herself get close, but she doesn’t let herself focus on the way that she feels warm when she’s near Tobin, or the way that her skin tingles when they bump elbows. 

When everything is set up, Ali and Ash (predictably) are still in their room, picking out clothes. Either that, or giving them space. Christen isn’t sure which is more likely. 

Either way, the lack of something to physically do leaves Christen feeling awkward in her own skin. She wishes they were back in Portland, on a soccer field, with a ball at her feet. She knows what to do then. She feels more at ease, then. 

“It’s nice to see you,” Tobin says, rubbing the back of her neck like she does when she’s feeling unsure about something (and Christen’s not sure what that says about how easily she recognizes the gesture). 

“Yeah. You too,” Christen replies, but then the silence descends upon them again, lingering between them, palpable, like another presence in the room. “Sorry I haven’t texted more. Practice with the team has been a bit intense since I got back. Have to make up for time missed, build that chemistry back with those teammates, you know?”

It’s a weak excuse and she can tell that Tobin knows it, but she nods anyway. “Yeah, it’s cool. I haven’t- I’ve been busy, too. With the pictures.”

“Right.” Christen nods. 

“You, uh- You look great.”

And Christen can’t help herself, can’t help recall the first time they met, when Tobin was adorable and a bit bashful and stumbled over her own words, and she says, “Fate.”

And Tobin grins, a knowing gleam in her eyes as she remembers, too. 

For a moment there’s a charge between them and Christen wants to throw everything to the wind and go to her and kiss her. 

She doesn’t though, and neither does Tobin. 

And then Christen realizes that she hasn’t returned the compliment. “You look good, too.” 

And God, she really does. With her tank top and shorts and the snapback now backwards on her head, her tanned skin and muscles on full display. 

Tobin blushes again and turns away with a mumbled, “Thanks,” but Christen can’t drop it. 

“Really. You look- Really good.”

Tobin peers sidelong at her and opens and closes her mouth. Christen can tell she wants to say something, but she doesn’t know what. She doesn’t even know what she hopes it might be. 

In the end, Tobin says, “Were you serious? About friends? I’d- I’d really like it if we could...you know, like keep in touch, and stuff. I’d-”

“Yes!” It’s too quick, too effusive. 

Tobin notices, too. There’s the hint of a smirk on her face, where a moment before she’d looked uncertain and self-conscious. 

Before either of them can say anything else, though, Ashlyn appears in the room and gives a twirl to show off her outfit. 

“Well, bitches?? What do you think??!”

  
  
  


She’d forgotten, somehow, what it’s like to watch Tobin work. It’s not like it was when she was shooting for the team during training, so maybe that’s why. Christen hasn’t properly gotten to watch her work, watch her focus like this since the original photoshoot. 

There’s an authority to her, a calmness, a sureness, that is so incredibly sexy. 

That’s not the way to think about a friend, Christen knows, but she can’t help it. She can’t help admiring Tobin’s muscles as she brings the camera to her eye or squats down to shoot from a different angle. She can’t help noticing the way that Tobin bites her lip as she contemplates a new shot or the way she sticks her tongue out between her teeth when she’s focusing hard. 

And it wouldn’t be a big deal. 

It wouldn’t.

Except that she gets caught staring. 

Tobin glances her way, like she can feel her eyes on her, and she offers a little smile, her eyes far too knowing, but the curl of her lips far too hesitant. 

It serves as a reminder to Christen that she did this. She is why they’re in this weird situation. Well, no, really her friends did it. But she is the reason that there is some awkwardness between her and Tobin. She had kissed Tobin. She had turned her down. She had insisted on just friends. And here she is staring like a horny teenager, eyes dragging slowly over muscles, dipping to cleavage, watching Tobin’s ass as she shifts position. 

And apparently Tobin isn’t the only one who catches her at it. 

“You look a little thirsty there, Chris. You can help yourself to something to drink, you know!” Ash calls out. 

And Christen can feel her cheeks burn. Friends. They’re going to be friends.

And she needs to not thirst over Tobin if she’s going to properly be her friend. Which means -

“Yeah, well, Florida is too fucking hot,” she grumbles. She hopes it’s enough to explain away her thirst and her blush. She tears her eyes away from Tobin and makes her way to the kitchen, pours herself a tall glass of water, and gulps it down like it’s a lifeline. 

“Friends,” she mutters to herself. She puts her head in her hands and sighs. “I’m such a fucking idiot.”

  
  


Saying goodbye is-

It shouldn’t be hard.

It shouldn’t somehow be harder than walking away from Tobin after their kiss, and yet-

And yet when everyone meets up after the game despite Orlando’s 2-1 loss to Utah, when Tobin is there laughing at Kelley’s jokes across Ali and Ash’s living room, and Alex is poking at her side, when Christen is watching Tobin’s easy smile and knowing she could be having it aimed at her, she feels the countdown to goodbye somehow so much more acutely. 

“You should go talk to her!”

Christen startles at Marta’s words in her ear. “Hmm?”

“Your photographer friend. She is cute and you want to, so do it! Don’t waste time,” Marta advises with a gleam in her eye that comes from being able to read an old friend maybe a little too well. 

“She’s busy,” Christen finds herself making another excuse. 

“Go be busy with her,” Marta answers with a shove. 

So Christen does, feeling the ache in her chest grow with each step. 

And then Tobin is turning to her with a shy smile, and Kelley is muttering some lame excuse and dragging Alex away by the hand and Christen is left standing there, with an ache in her chest, the word “friend” echoing in her head. 

“You played amazingly,” Tobin says, her voice low and a little hoarse. “Seriously, it was- God, you’re so fast, you know that? I’m so glad I don’t have to play against you.” Tobin laughs and the sound sends butterflies through Christen’s stomach. 

She feels her cheeks growing warm, knows there’s a blush forming on them, but she can’t stop from smiling in reply. “Thanks.”

“No, I mean it. You’re SO good. I don’t know why you don’t get more starts for the National Team because- Wow! And that goal!” Tobin kisses the tips of her fingers and opens her hand. “Perfection, Chris.”

And there’s something about the way Christen’s nickname falls from her lips so easily, something in the way that Tobin’s leaning in closer-

She repeats the word “friends” in her mind, but it feels like more of a lie. 

“I’m just glad we could hold on for the win. It’s always nice to come away with three points.”

“Especially when you curve one into the back of the net around Ash like that. I mean- Wow. I know I’ve seen you at practice, but this was different.”

Christen feels herself blushing harder. Tobin is being so effusive. She’s not letting it drop. She’s not moving on. She’s-

Maybe she’s trying to get a reaction, Christen thinks. 

And her eyes drop to Tobin’s lips. She tells herself it’s just to see if she’s smirking, but she’s not and now Christen doesn’t want to look away. She can practically feel those lips on hers, can feel the way she’s leaning in closer, the way her whole body wants to close the gap.

But then Tobin clears her throat, and Christen’s eyes snap up, and she knows she’s been caught, but instead of a smirk on Tobin’s face, there’s surprise. “So when do you guys fly out?” 

“Tomorrow,” Christen replies. 

“Right, yeah, Kelley said,” Tobin comments, almost absentmindedly. 

“What about you?”

“Um, I guess Ali and Ash want me to do a photoshoot of the dogs too, so I’m hanging out until Tuesday, then flying home.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I’m glad I was able to see you here,” Christen says. She notes the way that people are starting to make their departure, sees the way that Toni is tugging at Marta’s elbow, the way that Ali is yawning. She feels herself running out of time. 

“Yeah. It was- It was good. I’m glad- I’m glad we got to talk,” Tobin replies. 

It feels like there’s more that Tobin wants to say, feels like there’s more that she’s holding back. Then again, maybe Christen is just projecting. Thoughts whir through her mind that half of her wants to just spit out, and the other half wants to lock away. She opts for the latter and smiles. She makes up her mind to leave before things get harder. “Well, I should probably head back to the hotel.” 

She opens her arms for a hug and lets Tobin step into them. She maybe squeezes a little tight, holds on a little long, as the ache in her chest becomes, just for a moment, almost overwhelming as she breathes Tobin in. The scent is warm and familiar and she tells herself it doesn’t feel like home. 

“Travel safe,” Tobin murmurs into her hair, and then she’s pressing a faint kiss to her cheek, just a hint of one. 

It definitely shouldn’t leave a lingering tingling sensation like it does as Tobin steps back with a small smile. 

“You too. I’ll- I’ll text you soon, okay? Or you can text me?” Christen offers. 

Tobin nods, and Christen offers a small wave before turning and forcing herself to walk away even as her body yells at her to turn back around. 

Friends, she thinks as she steps out into the humid night air, is going to be difficult. 


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin and Christen text and Tobin gets hijacked by the Thorns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay home (if you can), stay safe, read fic. To any of you who are sick: please get better soon. To any of you who have to work: thank you. I hope this offers everyone who reads it a brief bit of escapism. 
> 
> Also: happy early birthday to ChaoticallyPeaceful! I know this isn't necessarily one of the ones you wanted as a present, but it's what I could get out in time! Hope you like it anyway, dude! <3

** _[Chris 3:15 p.m.]_ ** _ Kelley is being insufferable today.  _

Tobin can’t stop the grin that spreads across her face. It’s stupid, and she’s not really getting her hopes up or anything, but she’s definitely not sad about the way that Christen is texting her a lot more since they got back from Orlando. They’re friendly texts. There isn’t any flirting. But just hearing from Christen makes Tobin smile. 

** _[Tobs 3:16 p.m.]_ ** _ What’s she doing? _

** _[Chris 3:16 p.m.]_ ** _ You mean besides trying to nutmeg me approximately 10K times at practice? _

** _[Tobs 3:17 p.m.]_ ** _ LOL! Sorry. That’s probably my fault.  _

** _[Chris 3:18 p.m.]_ ** _ ...Why?? What’d you do?? _

** _[Tobs 3:19 p.m.]_ ** _ Bet her she wouldn’t be able to.  _

** _[Chris 3:19 p.m.] _ ** _ Oh, so by “probably” you meant “definitely” your fault.  _

** _[Tobs 3:20 p.m.]_ ** _ Yes. Sorry. :/ _

** _[Chris 3:20 p.m.]_ ** _ You’re forgiven. Kelley, on the other hand, is not.  _

** _[Tobs 3:21 p.m.]_ ** _ Haha, why am I forgiven and she’s not? _

** _[Chris 3:22 p.m.]_ ** _ Because you didn’t also knock my coffee this morning and make me spill it all over me.  _

** _[Tobs 3:23 p.m.]_ ** _ Ooooh noooo! Was it hot? Are you okay? _

** _[Chris 3:24 p.m.]_ ** _ It was that perfect warm where you can drink it down fine without it scalding you but it’s not on the verge of cold yet and it ended up half down my 2nd favorite shirt instead of happily in my mouth. _

Tobin tries not to think about Christen’s mouth. She tries not to think about kissing her mouth, about swiping her tongue into it, about the way that felt, about how much she wants to do it again. Instead she tries to focus on how annoyed she would be in Christen’s situation. 

** _[Tobs 3:25 p.m.]_ ** _ Ugh, that sucks. Sorry! _

She can’t help opening up her messages with Kelley too. 

** _[Tobito 3:27 p.m.]_ ** _ Okay the bet is off about megging Christen. _

** _[KO 3:28 p.m.] _ ** _ Why? Is she getting to you? You can’t back out just because you have the hots for her. That’s not fair. I have 1 more day to do it and then you owe me a case of beer. Bet’s a bet Tobin. Don’t flake on me now. _

** _[Chris 3:28 p.m.]_ ** _ Not your fault! Though sometimes maybe I wish you were my teammate instead of Kel. _

Tobin feels her chest contract. It’s a joke. She KNOWS it’s a joke. But it’s also the closest to anything even vaguely flirty that they’ve exchanged and that-

Well, that does something to her. 

She chooses to respond to Kelley first, to give herself a second to calm her racing heart before she replies to Christen. 

** _[Tobito 3:29 p.m.] _ ** _ It’s not flaking. It’s being considerate! And I don’t have the hots for her. We’re friends. _

** _[KO 3:30 p.m.]_ ** _ Yeah okay. Sure, Tobin. Friends who kiss.  _

** _[Tobito 3:30 p.m.] _ ** _ Friends who KISSED. Past tense.  _

She needs to respond to Christen. Technically it’s not an open-ended text, but if she DOESN’T respond it’ll get weird. Maybe not for Christen, but it will weigh on her. She’ll think about it and overthink her response and end up texting something stupid at a point when Christen has already forgotten about the entire conversation. 

** _[Tobs 3:32 p.m.]_ ** _ Ha. I don’t think I’d be a great left back. _

** _[Chris 3:33 p.m.] _ ** _ I don’t know. I wouldn’t underestimate you.  _

Another text comes in from Kelley, but she swipes up, doesn’t flip to it. Instead her eyes focus on the words that Christen sent. It’s not flirting. But it feels like maybe flirting lite. Obviously there’s no tone in a text message, but Tobin swears she reads one in the words anyway. 

** _[Tobs 3:34 p.m.]_ ** _ If you don’t let Kelley meg you I’ll buy you a drink next time you’re in town.  _

She tells herself she’s not offering a date, but she’s not sure she believes it. 

  
  


“You’re coming to the game Saturday night.”

“What? Who is this?” Tobin asks into the phone. 

“Emily. Sonnett. You’re coming to the Thorns game Saturday night. Bring your camera. We got you a press pass.”

Tobin’s brows furrow in confusion.

“Get it? PRESS pass?” Sonny adds. 

And now Tobin rolls her eyes. “You’re not playing the Royals. Chris said she’s got a home game.” 

“Oooooh! So the lines of communication are still open! That’s good. That’s promising.”

“Sonnett,” Tobin warns. 

“No, look, okay, we’re playing Sky Blue, so you’re going to come and photograph us kicking Carli’s butt. Don’t tell her I said that. She’d probably kick my butt.” 

Tobin snorts. She can just picture that. 

“The point is,” Sonny continues, “we miss you, and we live in the same town as you, so you’re coming to our game and you’re going to shoot it from the sidelines and then we’re going to hang. Got it?”

“Do I get a say in this?” Tobin asks with a sigh. 

“No,” Sonny replies. 

“Do I get paid for this?”

Tobin hears some muffled murmurs on the other end of the line and then Sonny says, “We’ll buy your drinks?”

Tobin snorts and rolls her eyes. 

“You know you miss us,” Sonny declares. 

And, well, she’s not wrong. “Fine. Saturday. See you then.” 

  
  


Seeing the Thorns play from the sidelines, camera in hand, feels magical. It’s not that she’s never been to a game at Providence Park. Of course she has. But somehow it feels different from down here with the “press” badge hanging around her neck. 

And then there’s the way that Sonny shoots her a double thumbs up as she’s jogging back to the tunnel, and pauses to grab Lindsey and point at Tobin, so that then Lindsey is grinning and waving, and AD catches sight of that and then she’s bounding over with a smile and a high five, and Tobin sees Christine Sinclair pause and look her way and turn to Sonny with a question, and Tobin thinks that possibly she’s never actually been more star struck than in this moment with Christine Sinclair looking back her way with a smile. 

And then the team is gone, down the tunnel, and the photographers near her are giving her surprised looks and she hears a few spatterings of “Who is that?” from the stands, and she feels her face turning red. 

  
  


After the game Sonny pulls her onto the field. She poses goofily for a few pictures, and then drags Tobin around to introduce her to teammates. Maybe it shouldn’t be overwhelming. Not when she’s literally photographed the entire USWNT naked. But somehow standing here in front of players she’s watched play for years from the stands, in front of one of the all-time greats, her favorite player, Christine Sinclair-

God, she’s more than a little self-conscious. And then Sonny is saying, “Tobin plays too!” and Captain Sinclair looks right at her with an eyebrow raised and says, “Oh yeah?” and Tobin melts. Or she wishes she could. She wishes that the pitch would open up and swallow her whole. 

And then Lindsey is saying, “She ‘megged our whole team.” And AD is adding, “Sadly, including me.”

And then fucking Captain Christine Sinclair, G.O.A.T., is looking at her with a gleam in her eyes asking, “Think you could ‘meg me?”

“Oh hell yes!” Sonny declares and she runs off to fetch a ball, and Tobin is standing there with her cheeks flushing wondering how exactly she wound up here. 

There are still plenty of people in the stands, and many of them are calling for autographs. There are reporters talking to the coaches and Tobin is sure that Sinclair, who scored one of two goals tonight, will be required to go give an interview sooner or later. There are other photographers, some on the field, some still further away, snapping pictures and she KNOWS that some of those pictures will now include her. 

Meghan Klingenberg has been filled in about the nutmegging and is actively recruiting others to come watch (and there had been a knowing look in her eyes when she’d been introduced to Tobin, she knows who she is, and Tobin knows that she used to be on the national team, she’s played with Christen, and she can’t help wondering…)

Other teammates are starting to gather around with interest and Sonny kicks a ball right to Tobin’s feet, and Tobin has never felt more out of place with a soccer ball at her feet EVER. 

“Come on, Tobito! ‘Meg her!” Sonny calls. 

She kicks the ball up, juggles it for a few touches, but her third touch is off and it shoots out at Emily Menges and when Tobin flinches her camera thuds a little painfully against her chest. 

“Not with the camera guys. Maybe another time?” she suggests. 

“I can hold it for you!” Sonny volunteers. 

Tobin studies her for a second, then reluctantly takes the camera from around her neck and hands it to AD. “Do you mind?” 

AD laughs as she takes it and Sonny lets out an offended, “Hey!”

“Smart choice,” Lindsey replies, and Emily Menges kicks Tobin back the ball with a smile. 

“Sorry,” Tobin mumbles. 

“No worries,” she replies. 

Tobin kicks the ball from one foot to the other, little taps, then looks up at Christine Sinclair. 

She KNOWS she’s outclassed. Even if she had somehow pushed and tried to go pro, she can’t imagine being at the level of one of the greatest international scorers of all times. But she HAS nutmegged Megan Rapinoe. And Alex Morgan. And Christen Press. 

She takes a deep breath and does a lame attempt that’s easy to block. All she does it keep her legs close together. 

“I can’t do it if you’re all standing around expecting it,” she mumbles, feeling her cheeks flush. 

“Here,” Sinclair offers, “I’ll ‘meg you.” 

And before Tobin can react the ball is between her legs. 

Sonny goes, “Oooooh!” and Lindsey is laughing, but Tobin somehow feels a little better, especially at the grin that Sinclair is giving her. 

And, as if it’s fate, a member of the coaching staff comes up and tells her that she’s wanted for an interview right now. 

As Sinclair walks away, Tobin retrieves the ball and jogs towards her, getting the ball barely between her legs. 

Sinclair laughs the rest of the way to the reporter as Sonny and Lindsey and AD lead a cheer for Tobin, and Tobin wonders, just for a brief moment, if this might be a world that she wants to look into being a part of on a more regular basis. The Thorns might need a staff photographer. She’s not sure. She’s never thought about it. Surely they already have one, but there would be no harm in finding out. 

Sonny leaps onto her back and AD is offering her back her camera and Tobin can’t help the way that she’s grinning from ear to ear. 

“You ladies owe me drinks,” she reminds them. 

“Showers first,” Lindsey declares. “And before that some love for the fans.”

“Always love for the fans,” Sonny agrees. 

“The best fans in the world,” AD says, throwing those still waiting a wave. She’s met with a cry of “She’s our keeper!” that makes Tobin chuckle. 

“But then drinks?” Tobin asks. 

“Then we buy you drinks and you tell us about how your crush on Christen is going now that you’re in different states,” Sonny replies. 

“Or just the first half of that,” Tobin counters. 

“Ha, you wish,” Lindsey mutters heading off towards the waiting fans. 

And just like that she’s back to thinking that her normal photography business is probably just fine after all. 

  
  


“Okay, but come on, you’ve gotta give us something,” Sonny coaxes. 

Tobin rolls her eyes. “I don’t, actually. There’s nothing to give.”

“We know you saw her in Orlando,” Lindsey counters. 

“Yes, where we were friendly just like we were when everyone was here,” Tobin replies. 

“That’s not the way Adri tells it.” 

Tobin turns to Emily, who, up until that very moment, Tobin had thought of as AD’s very lovely fiancée. “What exactly has she been telling you?”

“That there was heavy flirting and it was adorable and you’re totally meant to be together.”

AD at least has the decency to look a little sheepish as she nudges Emily with her leg and mutters, “You weren’t supposed to share that last bit.”

Tobin glares. “There was light flirting at best, and we decided being friends made more sense with the distance and busy schedules and everything,” Tobin explains. 

So she doesn’t mention the kisses, or the longing looks, or the way it had felt being in the same place as Christen again. So she doesn’t mention the way that saying goodbye to Christen a second time was so much harder than saying it the first time, even though there was none of the uncertainty about where she stood this time. It’s not a big deal, and it’s definitely none of their business. 

As if actively trying to betray her, her phone vibrates and a familiar name is on the screen when she checks it. A smile tugs at the corners of her lips without her express permission. 

** _[Chris 9:42 p.m.]_ ** _ I am soooo tired. Did you watch the game? _

** _[Tobs 9:43 p.m.]_ ** _ Sorry, your teammates dragged me to theirs instead. They bribed me with drinks afterwards.  _

She doesn’t add, “I’d much rather have been watching you,” but that doesn’t stop her from thinking it. 

“Let me guess,” Lindsey says, leaning across the table towards her and trying to peer at her phone, “Christen?”

“It’s just a friend,” Tobin replies, technically not a lie, as she moves her phone closer to her chest so that Lindsey can’t see. 

** _[Chris 9:44 p.m.]_ ** _ So you went to a Thorns game, then? You know you’re really a Royals fan at heart, right?? _

Tobin laughs. She can’t help it. 

** _[Tobs 9:45 p.m.]_ ** _ Yes, a Thorns game. Lindsey and Sonny arranged it so I was on the sidelines with my camera and it was awesome. I met I think the whole team afterwards.  _

** _[Tobs 9:46 p.m.] _ ** _ I megged Sinclair! _

** _[Tobs 9:46 p.m.] _ ** _ Thorns > Royals. Tell Kelley. ;) _

“No, it’s totally Christen. Look at that smile,” Sonny says. “That’s a ‘my crush just texted me’ smile if I ever saw one.”

Tobin’s smile drops quickly once she’s aware of it. She doesn’t mean to smile every time she’s texting with Christen, but she can’t help it. She can picture Christen’s cheeky smile and her bright eyes, she can hear the musical quality to her voice and she can-

“Dreamy look in her eyes too,” AD adds. 

Tobin groans. “You all suck.” 

** _[Chris 9:47 p.m.] _ ** _ *gasp* Take it back! _

** _[Tobs 9:47 p.m.]_ ** _ Never lol _

** _[Chris 9:48 p.m.]_ ** _ Pretty sure you now owe me two drinks. One for not letting Kelley meg me and one for being so very wrong in your club allegiance. _

Tobin feels her heart rate speed up. It’s not a date. It’s not flirting. It’s just some playful banter. That’s all. 

** _[Tobs 9:49 p.m.]_ ** _ I think I can handle 2 drinks. Not because I’m wrong though. _

She doesn’t type out, “Just because you’re cute.”

“We suck, but you’re the one texting your crush when you’re out with friends,” Sonny points out.

** _[Chris 9:50 p.m.]_ ** _ Lol, I’ll win you over yet. Tell Sonny and Lindsey and AD I say hi. _

“Chris says hi,” Tobin mumbles before she’s thought better of it. 

“Oh my God! See? I knew it was Christen!” Sonny declares and Lindsey is laughing and AD and Emily are exchanging a look, and Tobin can’t do anything but groan. 

“You all suck,” she repeats. 

“You love us,” Sonny counters. 

And the worst part is, she kind of does. 

  
  


“Auntie Toto?” 

“What’s up, kiddo?” Tobin asks, lifting Jrue into her lap. 

“Can we play with Auntie Christen again soon?”

Tobin feels her throat clench and her chest go tight. She swallows thickly and looks over Jrue’s head to find Lauren looking back at her, eyes sympathetic. 

She clears her throat and tries to explain, “Um, Auntie Christen is back with her team in Utah, JT.”

“But can she come for a playdate?” 

The look on Jrue’s face is so innocent, so hopeful, it makes Tobin well up with emotion. “I’m sorry, sweetie. Utah is a little far away for that.”

And Jrue’s sweet little face falls, her lower lip pouting out, and Tobin finds herself scrambling to help her feel better. 

“But we could call her! Do you want to Facetime her?” Tobin offers. 

“Tobs, it’s okay, we don’t-” Lauren starts to say, but Tobin waves her off. 

She can handle a Facetime call with Christen. It’s not for her. It’s for Jrue. It’s not like she’ll be caught staring at Christen’s radiant beauty and making things uncomfortable because Jrue will be the one on screen. It’ll be fine. 

She’s making the call before she can properly think it over, before she can overanalyze the fact that although they’ve been texting, they haven’t so much as talked over a normal phone call without video. Christen might be busy. She might not want to Facetime. She might-

“Hey!” There’s confusion evident in Christen’s voice and on her face, but there’s also a smile that takes Tobin’s breath away and Jrue cries, “Christen!!!!”

“Jrue was asking for a playdate with Auntie Christen, so I said we could call. I’m sorry. We can do this another time if you’re right in the middle of something. I should’ve texted first.”

“Auntie Christen?” Christen echoes, her voice soft, and Tobin can see the way she’s melting at the phrase, can see how touched she is. 

“That’s you,” Jrue explains in a tone of voice that suggests that that should be obvious, and Tobin thinks, not for the first time, that it’s amazing how much attitude can fit into such a small body. 

“Well of course!” Christen declares with a grin. 

“If you’re busy-” Tobin starts again, more half-heartedly this time. 

“Not busy,” Christen says quickly. “It’s nice to see you guys.”

Tobin thinks that Christen’s eyes focus on her, just for a moment, as she says that, but it’s so hard to tell through the screen, and then Christen is saying, “Especially you, Jrue! How is my favorite future soccer star?” 

“I’m good. Can you come play?”

“In a few weeks maybe. When I have a game there. Would that be okay?”

Jrue nods, and Tobin feels something surging in her chest, an emotion she doesn’t want to name. It’s too soon. They barely know each other. And yet the way that Christen is with Jrue, the way that she’s fitting into her life even when she’d said she couldn’t- 

Tobin can’t help the longing feeling in the pit of her stomach. 

She catches Lauren’s eye again, over the top of her phone, and she sees the knowing on her friend’s face. 

Christen isn’t just a crush she’s going to get over. Not quickly. Not easily. 

Christen is-

Well, she’s something more. 

  
  


Tobin doesn’t recognize the number that’s calling, but that’s not uncommon. Not everyone likes to book online for a session. 

“Hello?” she answers, already pulling up her calendar on her computer so that she can check her availability, not that she really has too many shoots on the books right now. 

“Is this Tobin Heath? The photographer?” 

“Yes it is. How can I help you? Would you like to book a shoot?”

“Hi, Tobin. This is Andy with Teen Vogue. We’re doing a piece on Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe about sexuality in sports and they have requested that you be the photographer for the article…”

Tobin tunes out a bit, her mind racing at the possibility that her photos might be in Teen Vogue. That’s...it’s kind of crazy! And exciting, all at once. 

“Does that work for you?” Andy’s voice at the other end of the line brings her back to reality. 

“Hmm? Oh. Yes. Right.”

“Okay, great, I’ll send you out a contract and if you could be in Seattle next weekend…?” 

“Yeah. Sure. That’s- Of course.” 

“Great.”

Andy talks over some more details with her, with a promise that all of this will be repeated in the contract, and Tobin hangs up in a daze about twenty minutes later. 

Seattle isn’t that far, just about 3 hours drive. Still, the fact that Megan Rapinoe thought of her to come do the shoot when she found out about the article-

Tobin can’t lie, that’s pretty cool. Her photos are going to be in a major magazine that will grace checkout lines and newsstands all over the country. Sure, technically the calendar will probably be sent all over the world once it drops, but that’s not really the same thing. 

Next weekend she’s driving to Seattle and photographing for a major publication! She can’t stop her squeal of excitement as she immediately dials Amy. 

“You are NOT going to believe the phone call I just had!”

  
  



	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen has a game to play in Seattle and she really shouldn't be surprised at who she runs into there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sincerely hope your week has involved less water damage and leaks than mine has. Hang in there! Stay healthy if you are, get healthy if you're not, and keep staying home if you can.   
xx

She probably should have been suspicious. It’s not like she doesn’t know her teammates. And after Orlando-

Well, she really should have had at least a slight inkling of what was to come. 

But Tobin isn’t based in Seattle. She’s based in Portland. And that’s a few hours away. And Pinoe isn’t engaged. She isn’t married. She doesn’t have any kids. There’s no obvious excuse for a photoshoot. So Christen didn’t question when Pinoe sent out the text inviting her over to hang out after training. Pinoe is one of her best friends. Of course she’d happy to spend the time with her and Sue. 

Except that she rings the doorbell and Sue greets her with a warm smile and a firm hug and a sheepish expression. 

And there’s Tobin, crouching on the ground, just packing up her stuff, looking as gorgeous as ever in a simple white t-shirt and some faded jeans, her tan skin contrasting beautifully with the pale clothes. 

And then Tobin’s looking up, surprise evident on her face, blush gracing her cheeks, and it takes Christen’s breath away. It takes her breath away to be in the same space as her unexpectedly AGAIN. 

And it’s not like they haven’t talked recently. Which is why she blurts, “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to be here?” 

Tobin shrugs and blushes. “I didn’t know if you wanted to know about my work. I didn’t tell you about shooting the Thorns game until afterwards and that was only because it naturally came up.” 

Tobin stands up straight and approaches cautiously, and Christen decides fuck it. Because if her teammates insist on throwing them together this often, the least she can do is greet her like the friend she’s trying to be. So she wraps Tobin in a tight hug and she does her best not to breathe her in too much, not to breathe in the soft scent of soap and detergent and Tobin. And she steps back with a smile and says, “Of course I want to know about your work! But...What exactly are you shooting Pinoe for this time?” 

“She’s shooting both of us, actually. And nice to know that I’m chopped liver compared to Tobin, even in my own home,” Pinoe says, stepping forward and giving Christen a quick hug and a peck on the cheek. 

“Hi. Sorry. Hi, P. What do you mean she’s shooting both of you?” 

“For Teen Vogue,” Tobin supplies. 

Christen can tell that she’s trying not to smile too big, trying not to be too proud, but, well, there are some things one should be proud about. 

“Oh my GOD! Really?? That’s amazing!” The second she gushes, Tobin holds herself a little higher, smiles even brighter. 

“They wanted to do a piece on us. We trusted one particular photographer to shoot us at home,” Pinoe explains with a grin. 

“And let me guess, it had to be this weekend?” Christen asks a little pointedly. 

“Well, you know how hard it is to find a weekend when we’re both in town,” Sue replies, but her eyes are telling. 

Christen doesn’t call her on it, but when she turns back to Tobin, she can see that she’s not fooled either. 

“ANYWAY, now that you’re both here, how about I get you both a drink?” Pinoe suggests. 

“P, we have a game tomorrow,” Christen points out. 

“Well your drink can be water,” Pinoe replies, unperturbed. “And Tobs can have a beer.”

“Um, I don’t have to-” Tobin starts to say, but Pinoe cuts her off with a wave of her hand and a, “Babe, come help me get drinks. I only have two hands!” 

Sue is quick to follow after her, but not remotely subtle, and Christen turns back to Tobin with a thin smile. 

“Sorry about my teammates,” she offers. 

Tobin shrugs. “Teen Vogue is Teen Vogue.”

“True. And that’s awesome. I love the work that they’re doing right now.”

“Me too. It’s kind of cool thinking that my pictures are going to be on newsstands all over.”

Christen grins. “It’s really cool, Tobin. It’s amazing. I’m really-” she stops herself, but she’s not really sure why, so in the end she just says it. “I’m really proud of you.” It’s something friends would say. It doesn’t have to mean more. 

“Even if I only got it because your friends are trying to push us together or something?” Tobin asks. 

“They wouldn’t have chosen you if they didn’t also love your photography. Pinoe is pretty particular about her image.”

Tobin smiles, the adorable little smile that shows off her dimples, and Christen feels her heart flutter, just a little. She doesn’t miss the slight tinge of pink that spreads across Tobin’s cheeks. “Thanks.”

“I mean it.”

Tobin nods. “I know.”

“I am sorry about my teammates being pushy, by the way. I know we’ve- We’re friends, and they-”

“It’s fine,” Tobin says, but it’s a little too quick. 

It’s not fine. It’s annoying. Christen will have to have words with Kelley later. She’ll have to get her to make everyone lay off. 

“It’s good to see you again,” she offers, because it’s true. Truer than she maybe wants to admit. 

Tobin’s smile then shows her teeth in that radiant way that always makes Christen’s heart skip a beat. “Yeah. And, hey, I’ll get to see you play again!” Tobin declares. “And as payback for the setup, I’ll root against Reign,” Tobin adds with a giggle, just as Pinoe and Sue come back into the room carrying drinks that it definitely did not actually take this long to get. 

“Heeey! There’s no need for that! This isn’t a set up! It’s just we figured that since we all know each other, we should all hang out while everyone is in town!” Pinoe informs them. 

“Then where’s Kelley?” Tobin points out. “And Becky?”

“And Allie?” Christen adds. 

Tobin points at her like “yeah, what she said,” and Christen grins. 

“This is a smaller hangout,” Pinoe replies. “Like a more personal hangout. With me and Sue and the two of you.”

“Like...almost like a double date,” Sue adds. 

“Subtle,” Christen mutters. 

“We’re just friends,” Tobin informs them. 

“Yeah! Of course! A double date where one couple isn’t a couple,” Pinoe says, waving away the protest. 

Christen mouths “sorry” at Tobin who grins and shrugs, and it makes her feel a tiny bit better about her meddlesome teammates. 

“Come on. You two come sit on the couch. Sue and I will sit here,” Pinoe invites, perching on the arm of an armchair as Sue settles in it. 

“Comfy,” Christen hears Tobin mutter under her breath, and she snorts in response. Tobin flashes her a grin as they sit down on the couch. 

It feels less forced than it did in Orlando. Maybe it’s just because they’re surer of where they stand now. Maybe it’s because they’ve had fairly regular conversations (mostly via text, but Christen can’t help melting every time she thinks back to the conversation with Jrue and how she’d been called “Auntie Christen”). Then again, clearly they’re not talking enough if Tobin didn’t know she was playing here this weekend and she had no idea that Teen Vogue had hired Tobin to shoot Pinoe and Sue. 

As if reading her mind, Tobin leans over, her breath ghosting hot against Christen’s cheek, as she says, “Maybe you should send me your schedule. So we know the next time your teammates are up to something.”

Christen flashes her a smile that she hopes hides the way she shivers at having Tobin so close, her warmth radiating off of her, flooding through Christen’s body. “Yeah. I’m honestly surprised Sue and Pinoe pulled this off so well.”

“Hey, we’re right here!” Pinoe protests. 

“And we didn’t pull anything off. This was not a set up,” Sue adds, but Christen shoots her a look that makes it clear that she knows that that is a complete lie. 

When Tobin doesn’t really shift further away again, Christen tries not to read too much into it. She tries not to feel it every time Tobin laughs beside her, arm brushing against her own. She tries not to notice the way that Tobin’s hand touches her arm when she’s telling a story about Pinoe being ridiculously drunk after the world cup and making her laugh. She tries not to feel EVERYTHING about Tobin so incredibly much. 

They’re friends. They’ve settled into friends. And, okay, they see each other more than she thought they would, but that doesn’t mean that she’s ready to upend her life with a long distance relationship. It just doesn’t. 

She pushes away the fluttering in her stomach and the way the heat pools between her legs and she smiles at Tobin like she’s any other friend. 

She just hopes that her eyes don’t betray her. 

  
  


“So how’s Tobin?”

Christen should’ve known that Kelley would know. She DID know, but she was in such a good mood when she was heading back to the hotel that she didn’t really think about confronting her about it. That is, until Kelley is sitting cross-legged in the middle of her bed with Corsie looking on in amusement. 

“You let her in?” Christen accuses. 

Corsie shrugs. “She’s entertaining.”

Kelley beams, then turns serious. “Stop deflecting. How’s Tobin? How was seeing her again?”

“You would know if you’d come,” Christen replies, sticking her tongue out at Kelley. 

“Okay, but was there swooning?” Kelley persists. 

“No! We’re friends.”

“Yeah, sure. I always moan my friend’s names when I’m alone in my room,” Corsie mutters as she pushes up her glasses, attempting to hide her smirk. 

“OH MY GOD, WHAT?” Kelley demands. 

Christen glares, even as she feels her cheeks flush. “RACHEL!”

“Sorry, love. The walls in the apartment aren’t THAT thick,” Corsie says, barely containing a chuckle. 

“Please, PLEASE tell me that you were moaning Tobin’s name for the reason that I think you were moaning it!” Kelley says, practically bouncing off the bed. 

“I wasn’t- It was just-” Christen shoots another glare at Corsie who is not even trying to repress her laughter anymore. 

“It definitely was,” Corsie counters.

“Oh my GOD! This is the best! Pressy gets herself off thinking about Tobin!”

Christen leaps at Kelley, clamping a hand over her mouth as Corsie laughs and Kelley shrieks. 

“I hate you both!” Christen groans as Kelley licks her palm and Christen snatches her hand away before collapsing on the bed beside Kelley. 

“You love us both,” Corsie counters. “Just not as much as Tobin.”

That freezes Christen in place, and her breath catches in her throat. “I don’t- I don’t love Tobin. I-”

Her heart is pounding. She doesn’t. That’s-

Well, that’s way too much of a statement. There’s attraction, a crush, sure. She can admit there are some feelings there. But love is-

“That’s way too much. There’s no love. It’s just- We’re friends.”

“Do you masturbate to all of your friends? OH MY GOD HAVE YOU MASTURBATED ABOUT ME, PRESSY?” Kelley demands, bouncing on the bed again. 

“NO!” Christen exclaims, rolling over and burrowing her face in her pillow with a groan. “God no,” she mutters. 

“It’s okay, Pressy. I know I’m hot,” Kelley informs her with a smack to her ass. 

Christen blindly swats her away. “I do NOT get off to thoughts of you, Kelley.” 

“Sure, sure. That’s okay. You don’t have to admit it right now. We’re talking about how you get off to thoughts of your ‘friend’ Tobin.” 

Christen takes a deep breath and sits up to face Kelley. “Look, I have eyes and she’s hot. But- It doesn’t happen a lot. And- Anyway, we’re friends now, and that’s what matters.”

Kelley studies her for a long moment, then relents. “Okay, okay. Well did you have fun seeing your FRIEND today?”

Christen takes another deep, centering breath, and nods. “Yeah. I did.”

“Great. So does Corsie need to come chill in my room so you can work out some of the repressed sexual tension before tomorrow’s game? Or-” 

Christen does not hesitate even for a second about smacking Kelley with a pillow. “Get out, O’Hara!” 

Kelley leaps out of bed and blows Christen a kiss. “Room 521 if you need, Rach!” 

Christen throws another pillow after her. “You all suck.”

Corsie laughs. “So do I get to meet Tobin tomorrow after all I’ve heard about her?”

  
  


Reign is a challenge. Pinoe is a good friend and a great teammate, but she’s an intimidating opponent. In all honesty, Reign is a bit better of a team. Their connections this season have been better, their possession higher per game. Probably by rights they should win. 

But Christen feels good tonight. She feels on fire. Everytime the ball comes her way she finds it easily. She feels like she’s dodging defenders left and right, the ball going exactly where she wants it to every time. She strikes a long cross and Stengel is there to shoot it back across the net. 

It puts them on the board first. 

Of course, Christen is not alone on the team, and there’s a rare miscommunication between Becky and Barnie that sees Pinoe slip one past her to tie it up, but there’s a voice shouting loud in the stands, one that seems to carry over the normal ruckus. And when Christen looks that way, she can pick Tobin out easily. 

“LET’S GO ROYALS!” she’s shouting, and Christen grins and gets back to work. 

  
  


The game stays tied through the half, but Christen feels more alive than ever as she jogs through the tunnel towards the locker room, Tobin’s beaming grin emblazoned in her mind. 

The pep talk from Laura is quick and to the point, and Becky gives a bit of a morale boost as well, talking about how well they’ve kept things together so far. Christen can see the way she’s disappointed in herself. She can see the weight she’s carrying in her shoulders for the miscommunication, and she resolves to make sure they pull off the win, if not for the team and the three points, then for Becky. 

When they jog back onto the field to start the second half, it’s a call of, “WHOOO! GO CHRISTEN!” that has her turning with a smile to the stands. Normally she tunes out the noise, letting just the roar of it fuel her, but this time, this time she knows who it’s coming from. 

She locks eyes with Tobin, just for a moment, and then she takes her position, feeling fire burning in her veins. 

  
  


It’s the 87th minute when the ball finds her feet with only one defender between her and goal. She has them beat before they even realize it, and then it’s just her versus the keeper. She fakes left, then right, then chips it right up over her head and into the back of the net. 

There’s a chorus of groans from the Reign fans, and a smaller set of cheers from the small section of loyal Royals fans, but it’s Tobin’s voice, again, that cuts through, and Christen can’t help but look straight at her, but search her out in the crowd. She can’t help the way she points right at her and grins just before Lo slams into her followed quickly by Kelley. And then she’s lost in the celebration, but she knows, she knows that somewhere deep down inside, it wasn’t the Royals or Becky or anyone besides Tobin that she scored that goal for. 

That knowledge terrifies her just a little. 


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin gets some more invitations and Christen and Tobin are learning to communicate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a short chapter, but hopefully you like it anyway. Thanks to commenter MissyFanatic for helping inspire this chapter!

She should probably have just googled “Utah Royals Schedule” or something to that effect. Something related to the team rather than a specific player. 

Her search results were-

Well…

** _[Tobs 6:45 p.m.]_ ** _ Do you know that there are people who think you and Kelley are together? _

She clicks on another link, a combination of curiosity and dread washing over her. 

She can see it, she guesses. If she didn’t KNOW them. If she didn’t know that Kelley was just one of those touchy-feely people. If she didn’t know soccer culture and how much there wasn’t really that self-consciousness about exposing abs or touching butts or whatever. She can see how the number of pictures with Kelley’s arm slung around Christen’s shoulders, with how often Kelley seems to be the first one to her for a celebratory hug…

And then there are what appear to be fan-taken pictures of them whispering together at some event or another. 

** _[Chris 6:58 p.m.]_ ** _ Yeah, it’s a whole thing. Kinda hilarious. Also WHAT are you doing that you came across this? _

** _[Tobs 6:59 p.m.]_ ** _ Googling you? _

Tobin feels her cheeks flush as she presses send and clicks on another link. And this one- 

This one is different. 

Her phone rings a moment later. 

“Why are you googling me?” 

Tobin blushes even more, not helped by the images on her screen. 

“I was trying to see if you were playing in Chicago next weekend?” Tobin says, but it comes out sounding more like a question than a statement. 

“I am, but why?”

“Tierna texted. She wants me to fly out and do a photoshoot of her and AJ and their dog. Family portraits she called it.”

She hears Christen sigh on the other end of the line, can just picture her closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose. 

“Of course she did,” Christen said. “You’re probably going to get one from Julie, too, inviting you to dinner while you’re in town.”

“I am?”

“Yes, because she just texted inviting me,” Christen relays in a tired voice. 

“I love your teammates, but they really are not subtle.”

“They really aren’t. I told Kelley to call them off, but-”

“She insisted she hadn’t done anything?” Tobin suggests. 

“Of course,” Christen agrees followed by another heavy sigh. 

“Honestly do you think they think we don’t know what they’re doing?”

“Maybe? It’s hard to tell. I can tell Julie I can’t make it to dinner if you want.”

“No! Don’t be silly!” Tobin counters. “It’ll be good to see you. If we’re going to be in the same city, may as well, right?” 

It’s maybe a little too eager. It’s maybe a little too telling of how much Tobin WANTS to see her, WANTS to spend time with her. “I mean that way they can at least think they’re doing something and then we get to hang out as friends.” Smooth. Subtle. She’ll never catch on. 

Tobin rolls her eyes at herself and continues scrolling down the page, and her heart skips a beat when she sees her own picture. 

“Hey you know when you pointed at the stands after your goal in Seattle?” She thinks,  _ when you pointed at ME. _

There’s a pause, a slight hesitation, and maybe Tobin’s imagining it, but she thinks it’s there before Christen says, “Mhm?” 

“There are pictures of it, and there are people trying to figure out who you were pointing at.”

“Are you STILL googling me?”

Tobin’s blush comes back full-force. “I was just kind of browsing while we talked,” she mumbles. 

“I’m not a riveting enough conversationalist for you?” Christen teases. 

“Yep. Super dull,” Tobin shoots back quickly, unable to stop the smile on her face. 

“Oof. Ouch. Way to wound a girl,” Christen replies and Tobin giggles. 

“Okay, but someone has posted a picture of when you and Kel and Harry came over to say hi to me after the match, saying they think it was me.”

Christen groans. 

“And then there’s ANOTHER picture of me on the field with Lindsey and Sonny from when I shot the Thorns game as like ‘proof’ that I’m just in with the team. And someone is arguing that that proves you were pointing at me and someone else is saying that you were just pointing to the fans in general and all it proves is that I know you guys.”

Christen groans again. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“What? Why?”

“For pointing at you after I scored,” Christen replies, and Tobin feels her heart skip a beat and her breath catch in her throat at the confirmation. 

“Oh, I-”

“I should have known you’d end up dragged into this. The fans are amazing. I love them. We couldn’t do what we do without them, but it means less privacy and you didn’t sign up for that. I’m sorry.”

“It- No, it’s fine. I mean nobody knows who I am. And it’s a little weird seeing my pictures online, but- It’s fine. Honestly.”

“You say that now, but-”

“Chris! It’s- I like that you pointed at me. I wasn’t sure, but- It- I liked it, okay?”

There’s a long pause on the other end of the line. Long enough that Tobin checks her phone to make sure the call hasn’t been dropped. 

Finally Christen says, “Okay.” 

“Good.”

“But maybe don’t google me. There’s a lot of fiction on the internet. You know us. You KNOW I would never date Kelley.”

Tobin laughs at that. 

“But really, don’t- I never google me. Let them speculate, but I don’t need to see it. I know me. And I know you. And-”

She cuts herself off and Tobin really wishes she hadn’t, but she lets her anyway. 

“Yeah,” she agrees. 

“So I’ll see you in Chicago soon, I guess?” she suggests. 

“See you in Chicago soon,” Tobin agrees. 

  
  


“I can’t believe you’re missing another weekend game,” Amy groans as she launches the ball a little hard past Tobin. 

“I know, but soccer doesn’t pay my bills,” Tobin points out as she jogs after it. Not that she’s hurting at the moment. She got the rest of the check from US Soccer for the calendar photoshoot now that they’re in production, due to come out soon. And the Teen Vogue check will float her for a few months no problem. Still, a job is a job, and with the extra enticement of seeing Christen-

She’s not going to say no. She passes the ball right to Lauren’s feet. 

“It kind of does though,” Lauren counters, kicking the ball back to Tobin. 

Tobin kicks the ball up, does a second touch, then passes it straight to Amy’s thigh. “Huh? What do you mean?”

“I mean that if you didn’t love soccer you probably wouldn’t have tried to get that calendar shoot job, and then since you’re you the team loved you and now you shoot soccer players on a regular basis,” Lauren explains, trapping the high pass from Amy and settling the ball before passing it on. 

Lauren maybe has a point. Soccer kind of does pay her bills. “Okay, but playing for this team does not pay my bills,” Tobin argues, juggling the ball high, spinning around, then catching it in the hollow of her ankle before passing it on. 

“Show off,” Amy mutters. 

“Besides, I’ll be back for the game on Wednesday night,” she offers.

“I’m just saying, if we lose, it’s on you,” Amy says, reversing directions again and sending the ball back towards Tobin. 

“Uh-huh. Sure. If only this team had any other good players,” Tobin replies pointedly, kicking the ball to Lauren. 

“Hey!” Amy argues, and then she gets it. “Oh.”

Lauren just laughs as she passes her the ball. 

“Oh, hey, Tobs, any chance you could watch Jrue for me for a bit Thursday afternoon? I’ve got a doctor’s appointment and Big Jrue is working and I really don’t want to drag her to the doctor with me so that she can touch absolutely every surface and bring home God knows what.”

“Yeah sure!” Tobin replies. “See? I can travel for work and still be here for my friends.”

The coach blows the whistle to gather everyone, stopping any further discussion, but Tobin can’t find it in herself to feel bad about missing the game. As much as she loves playing and she loves her team, there is more to life, and, well, maybe she’s still holding out hope that Christen is part of that “more”. 

  
  


“Can we call Auntie Chris ‘gain?” 

“What, no hello?” Tobin laughs as Jrue runs right to her and climbs into her lap. 

“Thank you!” Lauren calls from the doorway, dropping her bag. “I’ve gotta run or I’ll be late because SOMEONE refused to put her shoes on for fifteen minutes, but thank you. I love you. I’ll be back in...an hour? Hopefully?”

“Lauren, get yourself some coffee or something after. It’s fine. We’re good.” Tobin waves her off. 

“JT, Mommy will be back soon! Be good for Auntie Toto, okay?”

Jrue nods. 

“Okay, love you, sweetheart!”

“Love you, Mommy!”

“Tobin, you’re the best! I love you!” 

“TELL AMY!” Tobin calls after Lauren as the door to her apartment shuts. 

“Can we call Auntie Chris?” Jrue repeats, tugging on Tobin’s sleeve. 

Tobin laughs. “We can try.” 

She’s not sure why she’s always caught off guard by how beautiful Christen is, but from the second that Christen’s face appears on her screen, she feels the now familiar tightness in her chest. 

“Jrue!” Christen cries in delight. “What a wonderful surprise!” 

“Auntie Chris! Auntie Chris! I scored a goal on Luke!”

“Oh my goodness! Future soccer star! Awesome job!” Christen replies. 

“Hey, you didn’t tell me that!” Tobin protests. “Also, hi, Chris.”

“Hi,” Christen replies, and maybe it’s her imagination, but Tobin thinks that maybe there’s a fondness to her tone. 

“I’m watching Jrue and she immediately demanded we try to call you. I feel like I’ve been replaced,” Tobin jokes. 

Christen giggles, and Tobin tells herself her heart doesn’t swell at the sound. 

Except-

Well, except that Christen didn’t want to be together because of the distance, but recently it feels more and more like the distance is hardly there. 

Maybe that’s silly. Maybe it’s just as much of an issue. 

Tobin keeps thinking about what it might be like to try to date someone who isn’t around most of the time, to not be able to take them out regularly, to not be able to kiss them when she felt like it, or hold their hand, or snuggle in bed or-

It feels like a lot, and yet when she’s smiling at Christen through her phone, when she knows exactly when she’ll see her next- 

It feels manageable too. 

To her. 

Maybe not to Christen. 

“You definitely haven’t been replaced,” Christen counters. “Nobody could ever replace Auntie Toto, right Jrue?” 

“Right,” Jrue agrees. For emphasis she presses up and places a wet kiss on Tobin’s cheek. 

“Aww, thanks, kiddo,” she replies, pressing a kiss of her own to Jrue’s forehead. 

“Auntie Chris? How long until our playdate?”

Christen frowns. “Still a few weeks, Jrue. I’m sorry.”

“So not tomorrow?”

Christen shakes her head. “Not tomorrow.” 

“Next week?”

Christen shakes her head again. “Sorry, sweetheart.”

Jrue sighs so dramatically for such a small child that Tobin has to laugh and she catches Christen trying not to. 

“Soon, though, okay? And I promise we’ll have the best time, okay?” Christen asks. 

“Okay.”

“Can Auntie Toto come too?” 

Jrue seems to consider this possibility until Tobin gasps and tickles her side until she’s collapsed into a fit of giggles. “Okay!” Jrue relents. 

“That’s right, okay!” Tobin replies. She ignores the way her heart beats a little faster at the implication that Christen wants to spend more time with her. That’s not her teammates’ doing. That’s all her. 

“We’ll beat her at soccer. You’ll be on my team, right Jrue?” Christen asks. 

“Heeeey!” Tobin protests as Jrue eagerly agrees. 

“Auntie Toto, can I have a snack?” Jrue asks. 

“Ah, the bottomless pit has returned! I knew she’d make an appearance,” Tobin teases and she’s rewarded by another giggle from Christen. “I guess that’s my cue,” Tobin sighs. “Say bye bye to Auntie Chris first.”

“Bye Auntie Chris!” Jrue says, already sliding out of Tobin’s lap to run to the kitchen. 

“She is so adorable. I can’t get over it,” Christen comments. 

“She is,” Tobin agrees with a smile. 

“See you this weekend?” 

“Can’t wait.” 

It’s too honest, but maybe it’s worth it with the smile that Christen wears as she hangs up. 

  
  


** _[AD 9:14 p.m.]_ ** _ Hey, you’re gonna be around in two weekends, right? Could I get you to do an engagement shoot for me and Emily? _

** _[Unknown 9:40 p.m.]_ ** _ Hey, I hope it’s not too late to text. This is Kristie, Sam Mewis’s sister? She gave me your number. She says you’re an awesome photographer and I was hoping that you could come and do a shoot of our dog in like 3 weeks? I’m in Houston. We can help with airfare. _

Tobin laughs and screenshots both texts, then sends them to Christen. 

** _[Tobs 9:42 p.m.]_ ** _ So subtle.  _

** _[Chris 9:45 p.m.]_ ** _ OMG. What am I going to do with them? _

** _[Tobs 9:46 p.m.] _ ** _ Guess we’re hanging out the next 3 weekends.  _

** _[Chris 9:47 p.m.]_ ** _ Can’t wait. :) _

  
  



	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen deals with some jealousy in Chicago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that there's been a certain sameness to the chapters lately. Hopefully this spices things up enough. Peep the total number of chapters (though, it's me so this is subject to change). I hope everyone is staying safe out there.   
xx

There’s no pretense this time. Tierna does apparently really want a photoshoot. Enough that Tobin is busy with her and AJ for a few hours. And Julie does invite them separately to dinner, but she also casually drops, “Oh, I invited Tobin, too,” into conversation ahead of time. Maybe it’s a sign that her teammates are getting tired of this charade. Maybe it’s just that they know that her and Tobin have caught on, that they’re keeping in regular contact, that it’s going to be harder to keep the element of surprise. 

Her teammates are good at so very many things. Subtlety is not one of them. 

Regardless, Christen finds herself waiting outside the restaurant for Julie and Zach and Tobin to show up with butterflies in her stomach. 

It’s silly. 

She just saw Tobin. She just TALKED to Tobin on the phone last night. This isn’t a surprise. She shouldn’t be nervous. 

Except-

Except that the reasons that she’s built up in her head, the reasons she can’t be with Tobin, they feel like they crumble more every time she talks to her, every time she sees her. Tobin’s job travels. Okay, it’s not ideal to not get to see your partner every day, but she’s seen Tobin so much more than she anticipated. And, yes, it’s her teammates’ doing, but that could be kept up for a while. And the more people who find out about Tobin’s photography, the more people will want to hire her, of that Christen is sure. 

Of course she still has reservations. There’s more than distance holding her back. She lives her life in the public eye and already Tobin is seeing the repercussions of that, already she’s been photographed, her identity questioned. It’s-

It’s a lot. 

Christen has learned never to google herself, to ignore the comment sections on articles and instagram posts, and mentions on twitter. She’s learned, through time, to develop a thicker skin, to take things with a grain of salt. The person that she needs to please is herself. The person she needs to worry about disappointing is herself. 

She just can’t tell if she’s letting herself down by not letting Tobin in more, by not giving her a proper chance as something MORE. 

“How do you always look so stunning?” 

Christen turns and feels a blush creep up her cheeks as she sees Tobin’s easy going smile as she walks towards her. 

There’s that, too. The way she always responds to Tobin. The way her BODY responds to Tobin. And that...That wasn’t a friendly greeting. Right? That was a bit flirty. 

“I don’t. I’m just wearing-”

“A gorgeous top and nice jeans, but you could be naked and you’d look just as gorgeous. Trust me. I’ve seen,” Tobin replies. There’s a cockiness to her that wasn’t there last time, like she’s feeling more bold about everything. 

It’s kind of sexy. 

“You know, when I took the pictures,” Tobin adds a moment later, like she’s worried she overstepped. “All of you look good naked. ANYWAY, hi.” 

Okay, maybe she’s not THAT cocky. Christen picks out the blush spreading across her cheeks and can’t help but smile as she pulls Tobin into a hug, her body warm against her own. 

“Hi,” she echoes, her lips close to Tobin’s ear. “You look good too.”

And she does. Another white T-shirt, v-neck, and ripped jeans. She’s not sure how Tobin always manages to make such a simple outfit look so hot, so cool. It’s a little infuriating. 

“Thanks,” Tobin mumbles, looking down at her clothes then back to Christen. “Should we go in and get the table?”

Christen is about to respond when she spots a familiar face over Tobin’s shoulder.

“CHRIS!” Julie calls out. 

“JJ! Zach!” she greets them both with a hug as they reach them. 

“Hey, Chris,” Zach replies, then he looks expectantly at Tobin, who Julie is now hugging. 

“Oh, Tobin, this is my husband, Zach. Zach, meet photographer extraordinaire, Tobin.” 

“So nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you. You’ve made quite an impression on the whole team,” Zach greets her warmly, but Christen can tell, by the sidelong glance he throws her way, that that’s not all that Julie has told him. 

They only have to wait a minute once inside for the hostess to lead them back to their reserved table in a private room. It’s not a big deal, but with her and Julie, plus Zach it’s nice to be able to relax without people interrupting for an autograph. Something else that Tobin shouldn’t have to deal with in her day to day. 

If Tobin cares, she doesn’t say anything about it as she takes her seat beside Christen and across from Zach. 

Christen can’t help the way she leans into her a little, the way she smiles at Tobin, the way she feels the warmth radiating off of her. 

It’s doesn’t mean-

She’s not flirting. It’s friendly. 

That’s all. 

And then she turns her smile on Julie and Julie is smirking back at her with one eyebrow raised and she realizes, maybe she’s just a smidge too close. 

  
  


It’s easy to fall into conversation with Julie and Zach and Tobin. It’s easy to talk soccer and opportunities and reminisce about her time at CRS. They discuss ideal travel destinations and joke about potential future holidays. Maybe that’s why the waitress gets the impression that she does. Maybe that’s why when she’s taking the orders she asks, “And how are we going to do the checks today? All together or by couple?”

But Tobin really doesn’t have to be as quick to respond as she is. She doesn’t have to lean away and straighten as she says, “Oh, we’re not a couple,” gesturing between her and Christen. 

It’s true, obviously. Of course it’s true. And it’s true because Christen wants it that way, it’s just-

Tobin makes it seem like it’s horrible that that was assumed. 

It shouldn’t hurt. By all rights Christen shouldn’t feel hurt by Tobin’s words, but she is. Just a little. Not a lot. Not worth mentioning, really. 

And then Zach is saying, “Uh, one check, please,” with his charming smile and commanding presence, and Christen takes the second of attention being on him to compose herself. 

It’s fine. Tobin spoke nothing but truth. There’s no reason for this random waitress to assume they’re together. In fact, it’s better that she doesn’t. Who knows? She might be a soccer fan. She might try to post about it. 

“Okay, great, so what can I get everyone. What about you first?” the waitress asks, and her eyes are on Tobin, and she’s biting her lower lip a little and smiling cutely at Tobin, who grins back and orders easily, and-

It’s nothing.

She’s overreacting. Besides, Tobin’s not hers. She’s allowed to flirt and be flirted with. It’s not an issue. 

“And for you?” 

The lip bite is gone, Christen notes, and then she remembers that she’s expected to actually answer the question. 

“Oh, um…” 

She knew just a second ago what she wanted to order, and now her mind is blank. She can feel her cheeks flush as she scans the menu again, and relief washes over her when she spots what she’d wanted. She orders with a smile that she hopes doesn’t look fake, and hands over her menu. 

And then Julie and Zach order, and then the waitress, four menus tucked under her arm, puts her hand on the back of Tobin’s chair and looks right at her with a smile as she says, “Okay, I’ll get your orders in and if you need anything at all just wave me down, okay?”

Christen tells herself she doesn’t feel her blood boil. She tells herself that she doesn’t have to take a second to unclench her jaw as Tobin turns back towards the table. She tells herself that Julie’s expectant look at her doesn’t mean anything at all. 

  
  


“Okay, I’m not crazy. She’s flirting with Tobin, right?” 

She can’t help it. It feels like the waitress has barely left their table. And now that Tobin is in the bathroom and the waitress is finally GONE, she feels ready to explode. 

“There’s maybe a little bit of flirting happening,” Zach says carefully. 

“She’s 100% angling for an invite back to Tobin’s hotel room,” Julie replies. 

“Ugh!” Christen closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “It’s fine. It’s fine. She’s not- She’s not flirting back, though, right?”

Zach and Julie exchange a look and that is answer enough. 

“Fuck,” Christen mutters.

“Okay, but you two...aren’t together?” Zach’s tone of voice is cautious. 

“No. Of course we’re not,” Christen admits. She gets his point. She doesn’t actually have a right to be-

She’s not really-

It’s not like it’s full on-

She’s not JEALOUS. 

Not properly. 

It’s more like mild annoyance. A slight irritation. They’re all clearly out to dinner together. The waitress needs to leave them to it. It’s not like they get that much catch up time together. 

“Maybe if you asked her out-” Julie starts, but Christen’s shaking her head before she’s halfway done with the sentence. 

“No. No! No. It’s fine. She can flirt with whoever she wants. She’s free to-”

And then Julie’s motioning to cut her off and Tobin’s taking her seat beside her with a smile asking, “What’d I miss?” 

Just like that the waitress is back again, hovering, leaning close to Tobin. 

“Hey there,” she says, and it’s just a touch too familiar, her gaze lingering a touch too long on Tobin. 

“Hi,” Tobin says, and fuck, there’s that slight husk, the one that Christen usually only hears when she’s got Tobin a little bothered. 

“Are you all good here? Anyone need a drink refill?” 

“No!” Christen snaps, and she knows her voice is a little bit harsh, so she tries to tone it down when she adds, “Thanks. We’re good. We’ll let you know when we need the check.” 

Julie’s eyes are a little wide and Tobin’s brows are a little furrowed as the waitress says, “Oh, okay,” clearly a bit put out. “Well, just wave if you need anything,” she adds with a smile before heading off. 

“Chris!” Tobin says. “You...I’ve never seen you be rude before. What’s wrong?” 

“What’s wrong? What’s- Nothing. Sorry. I just don’t like her hovering. Makes me feel like I have to rush my meal.”

Tobin’s eyes stay focused on her, boring into her, and Christen can’t meet her gaze. She can’t let her know-

It’s not really a big deal anyway, and she doesn’t want to make it one. It doesn’t mean-

“So the calendars come out next week! I’m so excited to see the final product!” Julie declares, and Christen has never been more thankful for the change of subject in her life. 

“Yeah, me too. Not that I don’t know how sexy you are already,” he adds directly to Julie, and Christen looks away from the adorableness as Julie pecks him quickly on the lips. 

“But your shots from training are incredible, Tobin, and Julie said you were so meticulous on the day of the naked shoot, I just know that the final product is going to be spectacular,” he finishes with a smile directed at Tobin. 

“Oh, um, it’s easy to take good pictures when I have such stunning subjects,” Tobin mumbles, her cheeks flushing. 

Christen feels torn. On the one hand Tobin is flirting with the waitress, which, obviously, she’s free to do. On the other hand, she’s calling her stunning. Or, well, all of them stunning. 

Christen picks at what’s left of her meal, suddenly not so hungry anymore. Her stomach is twisting in knots that have nothing to do with dinner and everything to do with the woman sitting next to her, but she wishes desperately that they would just leave her alone. 

“She was so good at putting everyone at ease. Honestly I didn’t think I’d feel as comfortable as I did naked,” Julie’s saying, but Christen’s only half listening. Instead she’s replaying the subtle flirting with the waitress, the quick way that Tobin had said, “Oh, we’re not a couple.” And she realizes-

That’s why things have been less awkward. And okay she’s still felt the tension on her side, but that doesn’t mean Tobin still feels it. 

She blew her shot. 

Tobin has moved on. 

Or is moving on. 

Or wants to move on. 

She’s not-

Fuck. 

  
  


“Hey, you okay?” 

Tobin’s hip is warm as it bumps against her. They’ve said goodnight to Julie and Zach. Christen doesn’t really know why Tobin hasn’t headed back to her hotel yet, why she’s walking down the city street beside her still, matching her pace. 

“Hm? Yeah. Fine.”

It takes Christen a moment to realize that Tobin has stopped and another moment for her to stop in confusion and look back at her, and Tobin is frowning at her, eyebrows furrowed. 

“What?” Christen asks, feeling her cheeks flush. 

“That’s what I want to know. What? What is going on? You were so quiet at the end of dinner and now you’re- I don’t know. You’re acting different.” 

“No, I’m not.” It’s a lie. It’s a BLATANT lie. And Christen doesn’t like to lie, but she says it anyway. 

“Yes. You are,” Tobin counters. “I’d like to think I know you well enough to tell, Chris.”

Tobin takes a step forward, but Christen matches her with a step back to keep the distance between them the same. 

“As well as you’d like to get to know the waitress?” Christen mutters. 

“What?”

The look of confusion on Tobin’s face makes Christen feel momentarily bad, but then she’s replaying the way that the waitress had slipped Tobin her number, not even trying to be subtle, and her blood boils. 

“The waitress? The one you couldn’t stop flirting with? The one whose number I’m sure you can’t wait to use?”

Tobin frowns and shakes her head. “Chris-”

“No, I know, I’m sorry, I get it. It’s not like I’m expecting you to wait around for me forever. I mean, at all. Clearly. We’re not- I told you no, and you have every right to move on I just thought- I don’t know. I don’t know what I thought. I guess I thought you’d at least refrain from flirting with people in front of me.”

“You’re jealous.”

“No, I’m-”

“Jealous,” Tobin cuts her off, and she’s wearing this infuriating smirk on her lips and her arms are crossed in front of her in a way that makes her arm muscles flex, and-

“Could you maybe stop looking so attractive while you’re feeling all smug about this?” Christen grumbles, crossing her own arms and looking away. She can feel the blush on her cheeks. She can feel the way this emotion that she doesn’t want to name sits heavily in her stomach and pulls tightly at her chest. 

This time when Tobin steps closer, Christen doesn’t step back. 

“I went on a date,” Tobin says. 

Christen’s stomach churns. 

“Oh.”

“Not with the waitress.”

“Right, yeah, I figured.” Christen tries to muster up a smile, but she’s pretty sure it looks more like a grimace. “Well, how was it? Did you have fun?”

Tobin doesn’t answer, and Christen feels like the silence drags on and on until she can’t stand it anymore, and she finally looks up at Tobin, just to find her watching her thoughtfully. 

“Does it bother you?”

“No.” The answer is too quick. Too telling. “A little,” she admits. “I know I don’t have a right for it to, I just-” Christen cuts herself off and looks away. 

“It was horrible,” Tobin says and Christen’s eyes flash back to her. She has a small smile on her face as she elaborates. “It was a blind date that Amy set me up on. I had to explain to her afterwards that just because we’re both gay doesn’t mean we’re compatible.” She lets out a low chuckle that floods Christen with warmth. 

But then she remembers, Tobin went. She tried the date. She-

“You can date other people. It’s not- I don’t want you to turn down someone you’re interested in just because of me. If you really want to call the waitress-”

Tobin’s hand is warm on her wrist as she reaches out to grab it, then she slides it down, threading her fingers through Christen’s until they’re holding hands. “I don’t want to.”

“Okay.”

“Maybe I’m crazy, but I guess I’m still hoping you might change your mind.” Tobin gives her hand a little squeeze, then pulls her hand away, looking suddenly bashful, as Christen’s mind still processes her words, butterflies fluttering in her stomach, replacing the nausea she’d felt moments before. 

“Anyway, I should get back to the hotel. I’ll watch you guys play tomorrow. Tell Kelley I’ll be cheering for Utah.”

“You’d better,” Christen replies. There’s maybe a hint of flirtiness to her tone. It’s not a BIG deal. Tobin’s words are still echoing in her head, after all, so it’s not like she’s really thinking things through. 

“Good luck tomorrow. Go Royals.”

“Go Royals,” Christen echoes. And then Tobin is offering a shy smile and a wave and heading off in the opposite direction. 

Christen watches until she disappears into the crowd. 

_ I’m still hoping you might change your mind. _

The words play in her mind all the way back to the hotel, all the way back to the room she’s sharing with Lo, all the way through her shower. 

As she lays back in bed and stares at the ceiling, knowing full well she needs to close her eyes and get some sleep, she thinks,  _ Me too. _


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin and Christen kind of fail at not flirting, and they finally call some of Christen's teammates out on their antics.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting to wrap up, guys. Hope you enjoy. xx

It’s only been a week. 

It’s too much to expect too much to change in a week. 

And yet, Tobin feels her heart beating erratically in her chest as she waits with Jrue, kicking a soccer ball to her, trying to focus, trying to remember to cheer every time she manages a good trap or kicks it back with good power behind it. She’s definitely an athlete in the making. 

Jrue winds up extra big, taking a running start to kicking the ball and it flies past Tobin, just out of reach, a little too off target, but Tobin hears a familiar voice cheer, and wonders if maybe it wasn’t on purpose as she turns to face Christen with a smile. 

“That was the best kick I’ve ever seen!” Christen enthuses, shooting Tobin a smile as she moves to hug Jrue, who is now eagerly running towards her. 

“Auntie Chris! Auntie Chris! You’re here!”

“Of course I’m here!” Christen wraps her in a tight hug and Jrue clings to her neck, refusing to let go even as Christen tries to stand up so that Christen is forced to lift her and hold her. 

Christen grins over Jrue’s shoulder at Tobin, and Tobin feels her whole body flood with warmth. 

“She was a liiiiiittle bit excited,” Tobin says. 

Christen chuckles. “I can tell.”

“Get down, kiddo. Auntie Toto wants to get to hug Christen, too.”

“But you’re old!” Jrue protests. 

“Ooof! Kids know just how to hit you,” Tobin says, pretending to be really offended as Christen giggles. 

Tobin holds her hand to her heart and staggers dramatically. “Old people don’t need hugs?” 

“No!” Jrue replies with a cheeky grin. 

“What? I don’t think that’s true!” Tobin says, sneaking still closer as Jrue starts to laugh. “I don’t think that’s true at all Miss Jrue!” she adds, coming in for a tickle attack, poking Jrue in the ribs to make her laugh and squeal until she’s wriggling out of Christen’s arms and running away. 

“Can’t catch me, Auntie Toto!”

“Why? Am I too old?” Tobin teases. 

“Yes!” Jrue calls back and Tobin gasps dramatically and runs after her, being sure to let her stay a step ahead for a little while before scooping her up with a “Gotcha!” and smothering her in kisses. 

“See? I still need hugs and kisses even though I’m old!” Tobin declares, setting Jrue back down in the grass. 

Christen is laughing too, now, and Tobin beams at her and approaches. 

“You don’t look that old to me,” Christen murmurs as Tobin draws near and she opens her arms to wrap Tobin in a hug. 

“I’d better not,” Tobin replies, sinking into the warmth of Christen’s embrace. She can’t help the way her words come out a little flirty. She can’t help the way she squeezes a little tightly, taking a deep breath in and breathing in everything Christen. 

And then Christen’s lips brush her cheek, just a little, just a quick peck, but she feels the touch tingle through her skin like electricity. 

“It’s nice to see you,” Christen murmurs. 

“Yeah, nice to see you, too,” Tobin replies, voice low, eyes lingering on Christen’s features as they move apart. And then she remembers where they are and who is with them and she says, “It’s nice to have you back in Portland, even if only for a quick visit, right Jrue?”

“You can’t stay long?” Jrue asks, pouting out her lip. 

“No, I’m sorry, sweetie, BUT I talked to your mom and guess what?” 

Jrue’s eyes go wide. “What?” she asks. 

“You’re going to come to our game tomorrow night! You, your mom, and your dad!” 

“What about Auntie Amy and Luke and Ryan?” 

“Them too!”

“Wait really? Also, you talked to her mom?” 

“Yep! And you didn’t really think they let me leave brunch without their numbers, did you?”

Brunch. They haven’t mentioned it since the painful goodbye, since the fierce kisses that ended in heartache. Not in text and certainly not in person, and yet it’s just rolled off of Christen’s tongue like it’s nothing, like it doesn’t conjure memories of stolen make out sessions to Tobin’s mind. 

“Ha, okay, well, that does sound like them,” Tobin manages to respond, her voice a touch on the husky side. 

There’s a faint flush to Christen’s cheeks, too, as if she’s suddenly remembered what else happened at brunch too. 

“Does Auntie Toto get to come?”

Christen opens her mouth to answer, but Tobin beats her to it. “Auntie Toto is gonna photograph it. That means I’ll wave to you from the sidelines and then I can hang out with you after, okay?”

“‘Kay.” 

“So enough about tomorrow. Are we gonna beat Auntie Toto at soccer today?” Christen asks, holding out a hand for a high five. 

“Yeah!” Jrue cheers. 

“You two wish!” Tobin counters. 

It’s only been a week, but Tobin can feel it, she can feel the change coming. She hopes, at least. 

“I start with the ball!” she calls over her shoulder as she dashes past them to the ball. 

“Hey, no cheating! Let’s get her, Jrue!” Christen encourages, and Tobin finds herself grinning broadly as she dances away, not so fast that Jrue won’t be able to catch her, with the ball at her feet. 

  
  


Christen is magic. That’s the only conclusion that Tobin can really draw. And she’s seen her play up close before at this point, of course she has, but somehow from the sidelines, with her camera poised to try to get that perfect shot, Christen seems even more amazing. 

Her focus is absolute. Her touches to the ball are all careful, exact, and so, so fast. Christen Press in game mode is almost too fast for Tobin to track with her camera. 

And Tobin is trying to. Well, she’s obviously trying to get the best shots, but it’s hard not to think that Christen should be in those. The way that Kelley connects with her on the field, too, is amazing, their history playing together obvious by the way that Kelley seems to find Christen with every cross she sends without even looking. AD is GOOD, though, and Sonny fouls Christen more than once just to get her to stop, just to keep her from getting within the 18 yard box. She picks up a yellow in the process, but the score on the board stays a level 1-1 until the 86th minute when a cross from Raso finds Sinclair’s head, and the ball finds the back of the net through Barnhart’s outstretched fingertips.

When the final whistle blows a few minutes later, Tobin feels her heart sink as Kelley kicks at the ground before going to shake people’s hands with a smile that’s a little forced until she reaches Sonny and ruffles her hair. And then she moves her eyes to Christen, sees the way she’s still smiling radiantly, chatting with AD for a second, then Menges, then she’s hugging Lindsey, all the while with that massive smile, a few sighs, a few shrugs, but the smile doesn’t falter. She’s lost a game, her team walks away without any points, and Tobin KNOWS that that stings, that she feels that disappointment inside, but she’d never know it to look at her here in this moment. And then Kelley is slinging an arm around Christen’s shoulder and Tobin snaps it, captures the way that Kelley throws her head back and laughs at whatever Lindsey has said, and Christen grins at her, the way the love and friendship is obvious, the way that just having Christen there seems to help Kelley return to herself. 

Kelley beckons her over, and she sidesteps an intimidating looking security guy who makes no move to stop her, and then she’s being greeted with hugs and Sinclair pauses to offer her a high five, so she might have a bit of a bounce in her step by the time she reaches Christen and Kelley and Lindsey. 

“Tobito! You better have gotten my good side!” Kelley declares, throwing her arms around Tobin’s neck. 

“I didn’t know you had one,” Tobin’s quick to shoot back, earning an “Oooooh!” from Lindsey, who shakes out her hand in a snap, and a laugh from Christen. 

But Kelley drops her arms and pinches Tobin’s side, making her yelp, and then it’s Kelley who’s laughing. 

“Jerk. I bet you’re going to say Christen doesn’t have a bad side,” Kelley prods. 

“Well, she doesn’t,” Tobin replies. She can’t help the way her eyes flick to Christen, and catch her shy smile as she ducks her head. 

“I feel like you’re a little biased,” Lindsey counters before wrapping Tobin into a hug of her own. 

“Nice win,” Tobin murmurs. 

“Thanks,” Lindsey replies. 

“I can’t believe you’re congratulating the enemy!” Kelley scoffs. 

“I can’t believe you had AD have me do a photoshoot this weekend just to make sure I’d be here for this game.” 

Kelley gives her a blank stare and for a split second Tobin thinks maybe she’s misjudged things, maybe Kelley isn’t actually behind everything after all. “I don’t know WHAT you’re talking about,” Kelley declares, but there’s the slightest hint of amusement on her lips, and Lindsey is suddenly finding the grass incredibly fascinating. 

Tobin looks at Christen who rolls her eyes, and she steps towards her and gets wrapped in a sweaty hug. “She’s an idiot.”

“I am no such thing! Look, AD volunteered.”

Kelley slams her hand over her mouth, like she hadn’t meant to say that. 

“Is there a shared Google calendar about us?” Tobin asks. 

“No. Obviously not,” Kelley balks. 

“It’s probably a group text,” Christen muses. 

“I wouldn’t- I don’t know what you’re talking about. Still. Obviously.”

Sonny chooses that moment to bound over and say, “Hey! What’re we talking about?”

“They’ve figured out the group text set up,” Lindsey mutters, and Christen cries, “Ah-ha!” triumphantly, as Kelley groans and throws her hand over her face. 

Sonny, for her part, looks momentarily panicked, then points over Tobin’s shoulder and says, “Hey I think Sinc wants to talk to you!”

Tobin isn’t that stupid, though. She doesn’t even turn. 

Which, in retrospect, might have been a mistake, because she practically jumps when a moment later Christine Sinclair puts a hand on her shoulder and says, “Hey, Tobin? Could I talk to you for a minute about maybe getting some prints of some of your photos?”

Tobin knows that her eyes are wide and she’s maybe a little on the shaky side as she nods meekly and lets Sinclair lead her away. She catches a glimpse of Kelley laughing and Christen elbowing her in the side before she turns all of her attention to the conversation at hand and the superstar she’s having it with. 

  
  


“Is it silly that I don’t want tonight to end?” 

Tobin doesn’t answer right away. She’s not sure she can. Not with the way her heart soars at the potential implications. 

And so Christen continues, “I mean, we didn’t even win the game, but hanging out tonight, all of us, was nice, and this city is…” She trails off and waves her arms, stretching them out wide as if to say, “well look at it.” 

“I do love Portland,” Tobin agrees. There’s something else, though, on the tip of her tongue. Something she’s been biting back even from herself, forcing the thought away anytime it’s dared to start to rear its head. She swallows it back now. 

“Yeah,” Christen agrees. 

They walk along a little more, keeping pace with each other naturally. 

“Kelley’s gonna give you shit for not going back to the hotel with her, you know.” It’s not what she means to say, but it’s what comes out. 

Christen lets out a small laugh. “Yeah, I know. I just...wasn’t ready for tonight to end.”

Tobin nods. Her mouth feels dry and cottony and her heart is pounding far faster than it has any right to right now, but it only speeds up as the backs of her fingers brush against Christen’s between them. 

“Hey, so the calendars are selling really well!” Christen changes the subject. “Which I’m both excited and terrified about.”

Tobin chuckles. “Yeah, I’ve seen some of the figures. I have to say that I’m glad that I’m not naked in it.”

“I don’t know. That would’ve been hot.”

And just like that the air between them is heavy. And Tobin can’t. She can’t keep up with this...whatever. With the tiptoeing the line. 

She stops in her tracks and it takes Christen a second to notice, but then she’s turning with a small smile on her face and squishing up her face as she says, “Too much?”

“Chris, I like you.”

“I know, Tobin, and I like-”

“A lot. I like you a lot. I- We have a real connection, and I know you feel it too. And I respected your reasons for not giving us a chance when you first said them because they seemed reasonable. Your life is all over the place and mine was here, but recently-”

“It hasn’t been,” Christen finishes for her. 

Tobin nods. She swallows thickly, but her mouth still feels dry and her hands are clammy where they’re clenched into fists at her side. She unclenches them and shakes them out as she tries to find the right words. 

“I know,” Christen says. “You’ve been- We’ve been able to see each other pretty regularly.”

It’s a small concession, but it feels big. Christen might as well have just said that a fundamental argument she had against them being a them is faulty. And maybe that’s why Tobin presses on. 

“I know that you have a lot going on, practices and games and travel and recovery, and I do still have a life here in Portland, but- I’m not asking you to give us a chance. I mean I am, but I’m not. I’m-”

Christen’s lips are soft on hers. Softer than she remembers them being. Until they’re not. Until she’s forced to take a step back to steady herself with the sudden force of Christen’s lips, of Christen’s body pressing into hers. 

And then too soon, before she’s even properly responded, Christen’s gone, stepping back, fingers on her lips. 

Tobin swallows again, her heart hammering out of her chest at a mile a minute, her brain feeling a little foggy, and she tries to continue her original train of thought. It’s important that she says this. It’s important that Christen knows. “I’m asking you to consider it, to consider that maybe you were wrong enough-”

“Tobin?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I’m considering.” 

“Okay.”

“I think it’s- I want to- Just a little more time? I didn’t mean to-”

She’s so fucking cute and embarrassed and her cheeks are bright red, and Tobin thinks that maybe-

She leans in and kisses her again, slowly, keeping it chaste but letting it linger. “I’d really like to get to do that whenever I want.” She whispers the words against Christen’s lips.

Christen nods, her forehead pressed against Tobin’s. “I’ll have an answer for you in Houston, okay?” 

Tobin pulls back. “In Houston,” she agrees. 

  
  


She’s just leaving her studio on Monday when a call from a blocked number comes in. She frowns. She doesn’t really turn down potential clients, but blocked numbers always make her a little uneasy. 

She lets it ring once, twice, three times. 

She sighs. She’s being silly. 

She picks up halfway through the fourth ring. 

“Hello?” 

“Hello, is this Tobin Heath.” 

“Yes it is, would you like to book a photoshoot?” 

“Not exactly. Ms. Heath, I’m calling from ISI Photos.” 


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christen shows up in Houston for camp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. My brain is on an "I want to only write new ideas" kick. But I haven't forgotten about my wips. Happy pride everyone!  
This is chapter is a wedding present for a dear friend! Congrats, dude! You know who you are.   
Thanks to lesbianrobinhood for the beta.  
Enjoy. xx

Christen doesn’t want to read too much into the way that she’s barely heard from Tobin this week. She’s just giving her space, giving her time to think. That’s what she tells herself over and over again. And it makes sense. She’d basically asked for that. Again. And Tobin had again said what she wants, had made her feelings clear. 

The thing is:

Christen knows what her feelings are. She does. She likes Tobin. She cares about Tobin. She maybe even lo-

Anyway, her feelings for her aren’t really the question at this point. The thing is, though, that having a relationship with her isn’t like having a relationship with other people. She’s in the public eye. She’d had Kelley google her after the Portland game, and sure enough there were pictures of her hugging Tobin with questions circling about her identity. Already people were making leaps, trying to connect her to Christen and others on the team, trying to link them romantically. If they were actually together, even if they weren’t public about it, the speculation would just get worse, the invasion of Tobin’s privacy would escalate. It wouldn’t be long before someone found her photography website, which had her phone number, her studio address…

Just the thought of the possibility of it put her on edge

And then there was the kissing. 

That put her on edge in a completely different way. She shouldn’t have, she knows. She shouldn’t have given in and kissed her, but she couldn’t help herself. Tobin had been standing there, blurting out all these words, looking so adorable and sincere, and Christen just...had to. And then Tobin had kissed her back. It had been so chaste, and yet she’d felt it all the way down to her toes, had felt the emotion behind it, had felt-

God, had just felt so much. That’s what Tobin does. She makes her feel so much. 

“If you keep bouncing your leg, I’m going to cut it off,” Kelley threatens, putting her hand firmly on her knee.

“Sorry. I just- When am I even going to see her this weekend? With camp, it’s just…”

“I know, but we’ll work it out,” Kelley replies, her face softening into a smile. 

Christen nods and looks out of the window. They’re approaching the hotel and somehow some fans have found out already. She can see a few of them in their jerseys lingering near the door of the hotel. 

“Can I really bring her into this life?” Christen sighs. 

Kelley leans across her to see what she sees, then she shrugs. “I think it’s her choice, Chris. And she seems like she wants it.”

Christen sighs again. Why did she have to go and give herself a deadline? But she knows why. She can’t keep Tobin hanging on forever. It’s not fair to either of them. And the jealousy she’d felt in Chicago wasn’t fair either. Not with what they currently are. 

She just wishes that life were easy and straightforward sometimes. 

  
  


Christen doesn’t know when Tobin is getting into Houston, but her text asking goes unanswered. She tries not to think of it as a sign. She tries not to think about other questions that linger unanswered. She tries to unwind from the travel and settle into the hotel. Kelley gives her a bit of space, some down time to meditate and journal while she goes to pester Becky into playing her at ping pong since the hotel boasts a table. 

She’s no closer to an answer by the time she finishes those activities, so she goes off in search of company rather than stare at her phone waiting for a text back. 

She ends up getting roped into a ping pong tournament that Lindsey ultimately wins, and it’s a good enough distraction while it lasts. 

There’s still no text when she heads to bed that night, though, and Christen isn’t sure which is more of a sign: that Tobin hasn’t bothered to text her back about when they might next see each other, or the ache she feels deep in her chest at the fact that she hasn’t heard from her. 

Maybe it’s the universe’s way of saying that she needs to make up her mind, for sure, one way or the other, before she gets to see Tobin again. 

  
  


Then again, maybe not. 

“Tobin?” 

Tobin smiles wide and bright. “Hey, Chris!”

Christen’s eyes dart around. Kelley’s grinning like the Cheshire cat. Pinoe is looking at her nails with a barely repressed smile. JJ is watching with a big grin. Sonny is bouncing on her feet looking ready to explode. 

“Did you guys plan this?” she accuses. 

Kelley shakes her head, but her smile doesn’t fade at all. 

Christen furrows her brows, but steps into the offered hug from Tobin. 

Something digs into her stomach awkwardly as Tobin squeezes her close, and she pulls away, looking down, and that’s when she notices. 

“Tobs, why do you have press credentials around your neck?”

Kelley’s bouncing now, too, and Tobin’s smile has only grown wider and Christen feels like she’s missing something major. 

“You’re looking…” Tobin starts, picking up her credentials and looking down at them as if she’s reading them, “...at the new USWNT team photographer!” 

Christen’s mind starts to race. It feels like a joke, like some elaborate hoax. And yet -

Tobin is standing there, beaming, waiting for a response. Her teammates have their eyes on her, all expectant. 

“What?” is all she can manage to blurt. She’s trying to wrap her head around how this might have happened, around everything that it could mean if it’s true. 

“ISI Photos called. Brad wanted to retire and they loved what I did for the calendar and for you guys, and apparently some people put in some good words for me so they just...called and offered me the job!” Tobin declares. 

Christen can read the excitement in her body, in the way that she’s up on the balls of her feet, in the way she can’t seem to stand still, fidgeting with the press badge, raising and lowering her shoulders. 

And Christen knows. 

She KNOWS that an answer is expected out of her, that she needs to react, but she feels kind of blind-sided. 

“But you never mentioned in any of our texts and -”

“I wanted to surprise you,” Tobin replies with a grin and a shrug. She bites her lower lip and raises her eyebrows, waiting, hoping. 

Christen swallows thickly. “That’s - That’s great, Tobs. That’s - It’s really great! Congrats! I’m - That’s great.”

And slowly Tobin’s grin fades, her brows furrow, and Christen wants to stop it, wants to stop the hurt that she can see seeping into Tobin’s body, but she just -

“I just remembered I forgot something in my room. I’ll be right back.”

She barely hears the words, “Well, that is not how I saw this going,” chasing her down the hall. 

  
  


“Chris! Hey! Christen!” 

She catches her at the elevator, just as she’s debating taking the stairs instead. 

She should have, clearly. 

Nothing clears her head like exercise. 

“Hey,” Tobin says as the elevator dings and the doors open. 

“Hi,” Christen replies. She manages a forced smile and then steps into the elevator, willing Tobin to give her space, to stay here in the lobby and let her process this new information. 

Tobin steps onto the elevator beside her. 

Christen holds her breath. 

The floors ding by slowly: 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th. The air is thick between them, suffocating. Christen doesn’t dare look her way. 

When they hit the sixth floor, the doors open and they both step out. 

And Christen realizes that at this point she has no choice BUT to actually go back to her room and figure out something she could have conceivably forgotten. 

“So,” Tobin says as she follows Christen down the hallway. 

“Mm?”

“I kind of thought that you’d be a little happier here.”

And she knows. She KNOWS that she’s being ridiculous. She’s just caught off guard. This is a dream move. This is -

“I mean it’s an amazing opportunity for you! I’m really proud. That’s great, Tobs!” she says as she digs her roomkey out of her short’s pocket. 

She slides the keycard in and pushes down on the handle the second the light turns green, moving quickly into the room. 

Tobin follows. She catches the door as it starts to fall shut and invites herself in, and part of Christen just wants to scream and the other part of her just wants to pin her to the door and have her way with her. 

She does neither. 

Instead she moves to her bed and sits down, perched on the corner, eyes focused on her hands in her lap. 

“Did I...do something wrong by accepting this job?”

And it hits her. It hits her like a sack of bricks. 

She wanted to be in on this decision. She wanted to have a say. Of course the say would have been yes. Of course she wants it. She wants Tobin! That’s the whole -

“Fuck!”

“Oooookaaaaay.” Tobin’s shoulders slump and she starts to turn away and Christen is on her feet before she gets halfway there. 

“No! Tobin! I -” Christen sighs, trying to organize her thoughts. “I’m sorry. I was surprised and I - You didn’t do anything wrong. You’re -” Christen bites her lower lip. “You’re -”

She lets out a long, calming breath, and steps into Tobin, pulling her in, holding her close. “You’re here,” she breathes into Tobin’s shoulder. 

She feels the hesitance, feels the way Tobin’s arms hover for a moment before settling around her. 

“Yeah.” 

“Like really here. To stay. You’ll be here every camp.”

Tobin’s arms tighten around her, giving her a squeeze and Christen lets herself bury her nose in her hair, breathe her in. 

“Yeah,” Tobin echoes. “I will. And other photoshoots.”

She’s going to be there. She’s going to be around. They could actually -

“I mean I’ll still be in Salt Lake City a lot. And LA visiting my dad.” 

“Most people say ‘Congratulations’ when their friends get a new job. They don’t dole out their whole schedule.”

She knows that Tobin is smirking that ridiculously attractive smirk before she pulls back to see it. She rolls her eyes but can’t keep the smile off her lips. 

“Congratulations!”

“Thank you,” Tobin replies. “Also, I haven’t told you the best part yet.”

Christen steps back, lets the empty space settle between them. They’re close, but they’re not yet - She hasn’t given her decision yet, and - 

“What’s the best part?” she asks. 

She takes one deep, calming breath, then another. Her heart keeps racing in her chest anyway. 

“So US Soccer is trying to boost the NWSL, too. Something about more international appeal. Anyway, I’m doing feature photoshoots for each team, following around some team members, highlighting the USWNT players and how you up the caliber of the league and stuff.”

“You’re -”

“So basically, after camp I’ll spend a week in Houston shadowing Dash players, then I’m heading to Utah for two whole weeks.” Tobin beams so brightly she may as well be radiating light. 

And Christen feels her heart flutter, feels her decision being made. It was already made, she knows, but now she’s accepted it. “Two weeks,” she murmurs. 

“Mhm, and then the next camp is another week after that,” she points out. 

“So it is.”

“So, I guess I was wondering…” 

Christen watches as Tobin shifts her weight, bites her lower lips, hesitates. She sees her body language turn unsure, a little shy. Christen takes a small step closer. “Yeah?”

“Well, I was wondering if, in light of this new information and all, you need more time to consider. Because, if you recall, you owe me an answer in Houston and, well…” Tobin gestures around the room as if to say, “Here we are.”

“Hmmm,” Christen says. She brings her hand to her chin, taps her nose with her index finger, pretends to contemplate. “I mean, this is really new information. It’s a lot to process.”

She sees a glimmer of disappointment in Tobin’s face. 

“You know what I was thinking, though?” Christen says. She feels light and airy, like all of the weight she’s been carrying for weeks now has suddenly lifted off of her. 

“What?” Tobin asks with a frown. 

And Christen lets herself take it in, lets herself think hos fucking adorable Tobin looks with her lower lip pouting out a bit. She takes another step closer. 

“We never really got our drinks together in Portland. Remember you owe me two, I think it was.”

Tobin’s face breaks out into a grin again. “Is that right?”

“Mhm,” Christen agrees. She reaches out a hand and finds Tobin’s hip, feeling it firmly beneath her hand, relishing the pressure, the warmth, the way Tobin leans into the touch. “You should definitely take me out for them. Sometime soon. Say, the end of camp? Or Maybe in a few weeks in Utah?”

“I think I could manage that,” Tobin replies. She’s swaying closer and Christen can feel the tension between them, can feel the magnetic pull that Tobin has always had over her growing stronger. 

She could give in. Just for a moment. Just one -

She wraps her other hand around Tobin’s side, guides her forward, settles her fingers around her hipbone. “Just so we’re clear?”

“Mm?” Tobin hums, her eyes focused somewhere below Christen’s eyes, and Christen smiles as she starts to lean in. 

Her heart is racing and her palms are a little clammy, but her mind is at peace. “I don’t need more time to decide. Let’s try this, Tobin. Let’s - Let’s try us.”

Tobin’s lips are warm and soft and they move slowly against her own. 

And then not so slowly.

One moment becomes two, becomes more, as Tobin’s tongue sweeps into her mouth and Christen’s hands slide up her back. 

It takes all of her willpower to break the kiss, to step away, to not give in completely. 

“There’s no girlfriends at camp, Tobin.”

It’s hard not to take in the way Tobin’s lips are red and a little swollen, the way her eyes are dark. It’s hard not to think how fucking sexy she looks. 

Tobin murmurs, “Yeah, but has camp really started yet?” and Christen gives in, lets herself be kissed again, let’s Tobin press her back against the wall of her hotel room. 

But then she presses against her chest with a gentle, but firm hand. 

Tobin sighs and steps back. She bites her lower lip. 

“No girlfriends at camp,” Tobin echoes. 

Christen nods, smiles apologetically. “It sucks, but it’s a rule for a reason. Even Ali and Ash follow it.”

Tobin takes a few more steps back, and Christen feels the distance between them acutely. They’re so much closer than they’ve been in a week, and yet it still feels much too far away. 

“Well, we’ve waited this long. What’s another little while?” Tobin asks with a rueful smile. 

“I swear, the day camp ends, I am going to take you on such a nice date!” 

“I thought I owed you drinks.”

“Well you can buy the drinks but I’m buying dinner,” Christen counters with a smirk. 

“Two weeks,” Tobin murmurs, and Christen wishes instantly that this camp wasn’t so long. 

“Two weeks,” she agrees. 

“Work first,” Tobin says, “then play,” she adds, letting her gaze trail slowly over Christen’s body in a way that Christen is sure she’s never fully let herself before. 

It makes her shiver. 

“Okay? I know it’s not ideal, but it’s our lives, and if we’re working AND playing together -”

Tobin holds up a hand and cuts her off. “It’s a plan. We can do this.”

Christen smiles at her. “Maybe one more kiss first?” 

And Tobin wastes no time in giving in. 

  
  



	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobin and Christen take their moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've been away from this for a long time. You might notice that I've changed the total number of chapters so that this is the last one. I've got a lot of feelings about this story and not all of them are good. I feel like I let you guys down a lot with the last one, but I hope this one makes up for it. At some point maybe I'll get motivated and write the epilogue I'd initially planned. Right now I can't see a way to write it without writing Kelley, and that's not something I'm currently willing to do. If the epilogue doesn't happen, I'm pretty happy with where this chapter leaves things. For those of you who are still reading, who have stuck with this through the slow burn and the last chapter: Thank you. I appreciate you. I'm sorry for the long delay.   
Enjoy!

She hates waiting. It feels like torture. They’re both there, they’ve both finally given in, admitted that there’s SOMETHING there, something between them, something worth exploring, something more than a crush or a fling. And now they’re not doing anything about it, they’re waiting, they’re being good, they’re being professional, and it’s all a bit...disappointing. 

But professional photographers do not grab the player running past them and pull them to them to kiss them in front of the whole team and all the coaches. Professional photographers find the perfect shots, adjust for lighting, make sure they’re using the right lens for the right situation, and - this one she has to keep reminding herself - take pictures of EVERYONE, not just the woman who has occupied her thoughts and dreams for weeks on end. 

Weight lifting workouts are the worst. 

Christen’s muscles ripple, the sheen of sweat she’s worked up making her skin shimmer in the light, and she’s not waiting on a ball, not studying the play, not running down the field, so she keeps shooting Tobin these LOOKS. 

Looks that Tobin feels from the top of her head to the tips of her toes, flushing her body with heat, giving her thoughts that she REALLY should not be having here in a gym surrounded by the entire team. 

And the team seems to know, too. 

They’ve laid off the pushing them together strategy. They’ve stopped their attempts to get them alone together. 

Now they just tease. 

“Chris is looking hot today, huh?” Ash asks with a knowing smirk as Ali’s eyes dance in amusement. 

Tobin takes their picture, hides her blush behind the camera. 

“Chris, it’s kinda hot in here. Nobody will mind if you take off your shirt and lift weights in your sports bra. Especially not the photographer,” Rose teases in a loud voice. 

Tobin faces the opposite direction, snaps a picture of Alyssa doing a deadlift. 

“It’s okay if you end up with mostly pictures of Christen this camp. We understand,” Becky jokes. 

Tobin narrows her eyes and Becky smirks. 

Tobin’s not sure which is worse. 

And then Christen is wandering off to a corner where the light coming through the windows frames her perfectly, and Tobin can’t do anything but follow, hiding behind her camera once more. 

  
  


There’s plenty to keep her busy, even in the downtime or while the team is recovering. US Soccer and ISI Photos expect new photos to post multiple times a day. That means she has to be on top of editing, of picking the best shots, of sending emails, and being in touch. And there’s her own professional instagram account to grow, her numbers spiking as she posts more pictures of some of the world’s favorite athletes. 

Plenty to keep her busy, but not to keep her mind off of Christen. 

Not when her eyes follow the lines of her body across every close up, wondering when she’ll get to touch, to taste. Not when she picks her out unconsciously in every group picture. 

And then she’s feeling the need to stretch her legs, to get out of her hotel room, to ease the tension from her shoulders that comes from hunching over a desk for the past hour and a half. 

She finds Christen in an ice bath with Crystal and Pinoe, towel wrapped around her neck for warmth, shirt pulled up to expose tensed abs, goosebumps evident on the skin of her arms. She’s so taken by the sight, her mind racing ahead to settings where she’s the one lifting up Christen’s shirt and the goosebumps are caused by something other than ice, that it takes her a second to process what Crystal is saying. 

“Girl, if I had that hottie waiting for me, I would not be waiting. That’s all I’m saying.”

Tobin feels her cheeks flush. 

“Crys, you’re straight,” comes Christen’s response, and then she looks up, as if she can sense Tobin’s presence, and her eyes lock on hers. The smile that breaks across her face is dazzling and it makes Tobin feel warm all over. “Hey!”

“Hey, um, don’t mind me. I just needed a break. I didn’t mean to -” She fades out, unsure what she’s trying to say. 

Crystal shoots Christen a look that unmistakably says, “Told you so,” and Pinoe starts giggling. 

“Wanna join us, Tobs?” Pinoe offers. 

“Yeah, no way.” She’s all about getting closer to Christen, but she’s not about to jump into an ice bath she doesn’t need. 

“Chicken?” Pinoe challenges with a smirk and a raised eyebrow. 

“Just not insane,” Tobin shoots back, and Christen giggles. 

She feels something well up in her chest at the sound and she knows -

She knows it’s dangerous. It’s more than just want. 

But she’s not going to run from it. 

Not with Christen. 

Christen’s only brought opportunities into her life and Tobin is pretty sure that Christen is the biggest one yet. 

She just has to be a little more patient. 

That’s all. 

  
  


She doesn’t expect the knock on the door. Not at eight in the morning. Not when she’d stayed up late going through pictures in the hope of relaxing a little today on the team’s first day off. 

She’s groggy as she opens the door, hair still sticking out at odd angles from how she slept, and then -

And then Christen’s lips are on hers, her body strong as it pushes her back hard against the wall. 

“I’m done waiting,” Christen gasps against her lips. 

And Tobin is suddenly wide awake as the door clicks shut behind Christen. She wraps her arms around her, pulling her in closer, feeling the pressure of Christen’s body firmly against her own. 

“No ‘no girlfriends at camp’?” Tobin asks. 

“Fuck ‘no girlfriends at camp’. I’ve waited long enough.” Christen’s eyes are fierce as she looks into Tobin’s, but her hands are soft where they cup her face, the touch tender. “Tobin, I have wanted you since I met you and every moment I’ve spent with you has only made me fall for you more. I’ve been denying myself for months because I felt like I should. I’m done. I don’t want to wait anymore. I don’t…” Christen’s words falter as her eyes drop to Tobin’s lips. She brushes her thumb along her bottom lip and even that simple touch sends a shiver down Tobin’s spine. “I’m so into you, Tobin, and I just...I want to give in. Just for today? Can we pretend like we’re not at camp? Like this day is just ours? Say we’re done waiting?” 

Tobin searches her eyes for a moment, the normally pale green darker, her pupils wide. “Sounds perfect,” Tobin replies, and then they’re kissing again. 

  
  


The fierceness of their initial kisses, the pent up neediness, the longing finally coming to fruition, fades as they make their way to the bed, as the reality of what they’re about to do sets in. Tobin feels surprisingly shy as Christen pulls up her shirt, hands warm against Tobin’s stomach, her ribs, her -

Oh!

Christen’s eyes go wide when she realizes that Tobin isn’t wearing a bra, when her palms ghost against hard nipples. 

And then Tobin’s shirt is off and Christen’s eyes are raking down her chest so intently that Tobin can feel the heat from it. She’s blushing down her neck and across her chest and Christen reaches out delicately, her touch barely there as she traces along ribs and brushes along the underside of Tobin’s breasts. 

Tobin gasps when Christen cups them more firmly, her tongue darting out between her lips, wetting them, her eyes watching intently as she rolls Tobin’s nipples between her fingers. 

And Tobin can only watch her, can only feel the sensations rippling through her body, can only arch into the touch. 

“Fuck,” Christen whispers. “God, you’re so sexy.” Her voice is almost reverential, and all Tobin can think is, “You clearly haven’t seen yourself.” 

She swallows hard, then cups Christen’s cheek, pulls her in, kisses her softly at first, then a little deeper. Christen’s hands fall to her waist, her thumbs stroking against the hollow of her hips, then tracing lower, along the waistline of her shorts, and Tobin -

“You’re wearing too many clothes,” Tobin murmurs into Christen’s mouth. 

“Then fix it,” Christen challenges. 

Her bra is black and lacy and it feels like it’s designed solely to entice Tobin. She almost doesn’t want to take it off of Christen, the dark fabric contrasting with the lightness of her naturally tan skin, teasing hints of what lies beneath drawing Tobin in. She brushes her thumbs across the front of it, feels the hardened nipples beneath, takes in the way that Christen’s eyes flutter shut, the way she presses her chest forward into the touch, the way she bites her lower lip to stifle a moan. Tobin does it again, harder and Christen does moan aloud. 

“Off,” Christen whines. “Take it off. Want your - Want your hands on me, Tobin.” 

Tobin’s breath catches in her throat, her heart racing at the husky quality to Christen’s voice, at the knowledge of what she’s about to fully uncover. 

And she’s seen her naked. Part of her knows that.

But not like this. 

Not when it’s just the two of them, alone in a room. 

Not when she’s allowed to look, allowed to touch. 

She holds her breath as she undoes the clasp and then the bra straps fall down Christen’s shoulders, the cups dropping away as the bra falls to the floor. 

Tobin swallows hard, her mouth feeling dry, as she lets her eyes trail down, over the perfect little curves, over the dark skin of her areolas, the hard nubs of her nipples. 

She reaches out slowly, as if this gift that she’s been given might disappear if she moves too fast, and then she’s touching, cupping the warm skin, feeling the bumps and the dips and the way that Christen reacts. 

She pinches Christen’s nipples, aware, still, of the way that Christen’s hands are back on her hips, are teasing at her shorts, her touch burning into her. 

It’s almost too much contact already, but also not enough at all. 

She kisses her a little fiercely, but she slows down quickly, letting her lips travel across Christen’s jaw, licking at her pulse point, letting her tongue flick against her earlobe. She pinches Christen’s nipples again, a little harder, encouraged by the sharp intake of breath followed by a low groan. She grazes her teeth along the bare skin of Christen’s neck, Christen’s head falling back to give her better access. 

The world feels like it’s moving in slow motion, every touch, every taste drawn out, lasting an eternity, the two of them lost timelessly in each other. 

And then Christen’s lips ghost against the shell of her ear asking, “Can I?” as her fingers dip beneath the elastic of her shorts. 

Tobin nods, bites her lip, feels the flush of self-consciousness once more as Christen drags her shorts down, taking her boxers with them. 

And she’s naked, standing before a half-naked Christen beside a bed in a hotel room. She feels bare, exposed, and Christen steps back, looks unabashedly. 

“You know I had to force myself not to imagine what you’d look like naked when you were taking my pictures that first day? I didn’t want to get too aroused. I wasn’t sure if you’d be able to see through the camera.” 

There’s a faint blush on Christen’s cheeks but it feels like nothing compared to the fire that is burning across her skin at Christen’s gaze. 

“You’re so beautiful. Fuck, Tobin, I just want -”

She kisses her hard but slow, their tongues dancing languidly together, as if the knowledge that they have all day, that this time and space is just for the two of them, is driving their pace. 

Christen walks her back until her knees hit the bed and then she pushes further, knocking her back, collapsing on top of her. 

Christen breaks the kiss, slides off the bed, sheds the remainder of her clothes, careful to keep Tobin’s gaze on her, and then they’re both naked, scooting up the bed hands finding the curves of each other’s spines, the dips of their hips, their lips seeking lips and tongues and throats. 

Christen’s nipples tickle against her skin as she rolls on top, hovering there, barely touching, strong arms flexing as they hold her up. 

Tobin looks to where their bodies are connecting, where she feels the pressure of Christen’s hips pressing into hers, their legs slotted together, and then she drags her gaze up, over Christen’s breasts hovering just above her skin, to meet her eyes. Christen’s eyes are dark and full of want as they bore into hers. They search for something unspoken and Tobin knows what it is, hopes she shows her with her eyes, hopes to show her all day long with her body. 

Christen’s breath shudders against her lips as she presses down into her, all air and space between them disappearing, and then they’re kissing again. 

It’s long and slow and Tobin can’t get enough. She can’t get enough of the way Christen’s lips feel against hers, the way she tastes, the way that for once Tobin isn’t worried that this is all about to disappear, that Christen is going to run, that this chance is going to evaporate. Something in their every movement is so intentional, so permanent feeling, that Tobin knows that Christen isn’t going anywhere. 

Her entire body is on fire, the ache pooling between her legs almost overwhelming, but she doesn’t rush and Christen doesn’t either. They kiss and they kiss, their hands roving over expanses of skin but skirting around anywhere that might push things further. 

And then Christen’s leg slots a little higher between hers, putting pressure right between her legs and Tobin rocks into it. 

“Fuck,” Christen gasps. “You’re wet.”

She sounds surprised, but Tobin doesn’t know why. How can this gorgeous, incredible woman not understand the effect that she has? 

“You drive me crazy,” Tobin replies, as if that explains everything. 

Christen bends her leg a bit more, presses up, and Tobin moans into her mouth. 

It’s as if she’s been waiting on that noise, waiting on Tobin to vocalize how much she’s into this, because Christen’s hands stop ghosting around and start moving with intent. 

Christen kisses down her throat, pauses, sucks, teeth grazing along the sensitive skin before she licks it, soothes it. Tobin doesn’t doubt that she’s left a mark, one high enough that people will see above the collar of her T-shirts, that people will know. 

“You’re mine,” Christen growls against her skin, and it only confirms her suspicions, the word hitting her right between the legs. 

“Completely,” she sighs as Christen’s fingers caress down her abs, her lips pressing across her collarbone, tongue teasing across her breasts. She moans as Christen sucks first one nipple and then the other into her mouth, hot and wet, tongue flicking expertly against the hardened nubs. 

Tobin reaches for her, tangles fingers in her hair, holds her against her skin as first her lips then her teeth pinch just a little at her nipples. And then she’s travelling down, kissing Tobin’s stomach, tracing her fingers along each rib, tongue darting along her skin, making her tense, making her ache in the best way in anticipation of what’s to come. 

And Tobin watches, lifts her head to see Christen press kisses to the inside of her hip, to the top of her thigh. She watches as Christen’s fingers trail up her legs, sending shivers of excitement through her, spreading her wider, exposing her, and then Christen looks up, green eyes intense as they meet hers, biting at her lower lip. 

“Can I? I want - Fuck I want you so much, Tobin.” 

Tobin nods, lets her head fall back at the first touch, at the barest hint of Christen’s fingers rubbing through her, tentative at first. The next pass goes a little deeper, not nearly enough, but something, sliding into her, sliding out. 

Tobin rocks her hips up, silently asking for more, needing more, but Christen doesn’t hurry. She does it again, humming softly to herself. 

Tobin knows how wet she is, knows that Christen could have two fingers buried to her knuckles with no problem, but there’s something about this, about the hesitance to rush, the subtle exploration, as if she wants not just this moment but all the future ones, too, as if she’s trying to learn her body. 

She sinks her fingers in a little deeper, spreads them, curls them, and Tobin squirms, moans, gasps as the touches change, as Christen hits the right spots, as she starts to find a rhythm, her lips pressing tender kisses to her hips, her pelvis, her stomach. 

“Chris, fuck!” Tobin moans, because already she feels things building too fast. All of her longing, all of her imagining, it’s nothing like the real thing. This is so much better, even if they’re just learning each other’s bodies Tobin has never been more into sex with anyone in her life. 

She leaves one hand tangled in Christen’s hair and reaches out the other for purchase on the sheets, twisting them around her wrist, grabbing at something as Christen thrusts deeper, finds the right spot, hits it over and over and over. 

“Fuck, baby, I’m -” A gasp at a sudden angle change. Somehow she’s made it better, she’s hitting more, she’s -

“I’m gonna come baby.” 

It’s too soon. She wants this to last, but her body is hurtling towards climax. 

And Christen murmurs, “Come for me, sweetheart.” 

And then Tobin is crying out, practically screaming, because Christen’s tongue is on her clit, sure and hard, licking, and she’s moaning against her. 

There’s a brief moment when Tobin thinks, “Christen is tasting me. Christen is fucking me.” And then she has trouble forming any kind of coherent thought at all. 

Christen rides out the orgasm with her, slides back up her body, kissing slowly, tenderly, taking care to caress each inch of skin. Tobin moans at the taste of herself on Christen’s lips when she reaches them. She feels her body spasm again. She wants more, craves more, but first…

First she needs to give. 

“My turn,” she whispers into Christen’s mouth. 

  
  


She has freckles. So many more than Tobin had expected. Constellations of them, down her chest, across her stomach, and Tobin traces each one, maps, connecting the dots, first with her fingers and then with her tongue, her lips. Christen shivers under her touch, her muscles flexing, tensing, anticipating. And Tobin explores. She explores the way that Christen moans when her nipples get pinched. She explores the way Christen pushes her lower impatiently if she lingers on her stomach too long. She explores the way that Christen gasps when she presses into the hollows of her hips, kissing, caressing, holding her. 

She explores the way that Christen whimpers and squirms as she leaves her own mark, dark and red against Christen’s skin, low enough her jersey will cover it, but a reminder all the same that just as she is Christen’s, Christen is hers. 

She explores and she looks, memorizing every inch of skin before sitting back on her heels between Christen’s legs and looking at the big picture, looking at the most beautiful woman she’s ever met lying naked before her, legs spread, wetness revealing her arousal, and Christen looks shy, throws an arm across her breasts, but Tobin reaches up, takes her hand, gently tugs it away. 

“You’re breathtaking,” Tobin tells her. She lets her eyes travel slowly over every line, every curve, pausing on the reddish-purple of the mark just above Christen’s breast, smiling at her handiwork. She trails her hands up the inside of Christen’s thighs, spreading her wider, letting herself properly look at what awaits her. 

And when her eyes flick back up to meet Christen’s she sees trust there, even though her cheeks are tinged pink in a blush. 

“So fucking beautiful,” Tobin murmurs. 

And then she kisses her deeply, tells her with her lips and her tongue just what she’s feeling. 

Christen’s fingers are strong where they grip her shoulders, holding Tobin to her as she kisses back fiercely, and then she’s gasping, “Tobin! Fuck! Touch me!” 

Who is Tobin to deny her? 

She full on moans at the first touch of her fingers to Christen’s folds. She’s so wet. She’s so into this, so into HER. And that spurs Tobin on. 

She slides in with first one finger, then two, feeling the soft wetness that awaits her, feeling the way that Christen’s already sort of clenching at her fingers, like she’s just as affected by all of this as Tobin is, like she feels just as much. 

She adjusts her wrist, adjusts her movements, until Christen is whimpering into her mouth, more panting than kissing her back, eyes clenched closed, fingernails leaving crescent shaped marks in Tobin’s back. 

And then Tobin builds, kisses at Christen’s throat, flicks her tongue against her pulse point, rocks in with her hips on each thrust to give Christen more pressure against her clit. She rubs and thrusts and builds up speed and she can feel Christen coming undone beneath her as she sucks another mark onto Christen’s collarbone, as Christen moans and pants and swears and says, “Don’t stop! Fuck! Don’t stop! Tobin! Right there! Fuck! Don’t stop!”

And Tobin doesn’t stop. She doesn’t because this is exquisite, the taste of Christen’s skin on her tongue, the feel of her muscles flexing beneath her, the way she responds to the smallest adjustment of Tobin’s fingers, the way she sounds as she gets closer and closer. 

Christen falls over the edge just as quickly as Tobin had, screaming Tobin’s name over and over and over as she holds her close. 

Tobin rides it out with her, holds her close, rocks slower and slower, but she already knows she’s not done. THEY’RE not done. Of course they’re not. If they only take today during camp then they need to make it count. But Tobin’s not done in this moment either. 

As the spasms subside, Tobin slides her fingers out, then moves down the bed, down Christen’s incredible body that she no longer just gets to look at, no longer has to simply fantasize about, but now gets to experience, gets to touch, gets to taste. 

She slides down and then she licks through her, eyes closing at the taste, at the salty sweetness on her tongue, on her lips, coating her fingers and the tops of Christen’s thighs. She licks through and Christen bucks up, cries out, moans, threads fingers through her hair and pulls, tugs her back, tugs her away. 

“I’m so sensitive,” Christen moans. 

“Then orgasm two shouldn’t take long,” Tobin teases with a kiss to Christen’s thigh. 

She licks again, gentler this time, probing, exploratory. She does this a few times until Christen’s grip on her hair starts to relax, and then she sets to work. 

She learns Christen with her tongue, what she likes, what makes her tug Tobin back, how sensitive her clit is after an orgasm, what makes her squirm against Tobin’s mouth, what makes her moan. She licks and she tastes and she savors every single moment because Christen’s legs are already clenching on either side of her head, her fingers tightening in her hair. 

“Fuck! TOBIN!” 

She can’t do anything but smile and keep going as Christen comes for her again. 

  
  


It’s early afternoon before they break for food, room service coming to the rescue. They’re wrapped up in the plush hotel robes, curled up in each other on the bed, fingers occasionally dipping beneath, straying to places that might lead to them being otherwise occupied when the inevitable knock comes to the door, but Tobin simply can’t help herself. 

“You’re incredible,” she breathes into Christen’s hair as Christen snuggles into her chest. “Everything about you.” 

“I’m human,” Christen counters, and Tobin can hear the hint of apprehension in her voice. They may be just learning each other’s bodies, but their words, their tones, that they’ve already been learning for months. 

Tobin brings her hand to Christen’s chin, lifts it so that she can look into her eyes. “I’m human too. You don’t have to be perfect, to be perfect for me.” 

She watches as Christen swallows hard, feels the weight of her holding her gaze, and then -

“Is it too soon to tell you I love you?” 

Christen’s answering smile is shy, but it reaches all the way to her eyes and Tobin knows that she can hear the way her heart is suddenly racing. 

Christen lifts her head, presses a chaste kiss to Tobin’s lips. “I don’t know. Is it too soon to say it back?” 

Tobin beams. It is. They know it is. But at the same time...maybe it’s not. 

The knock sounds at the door breaking the moment. 

“Oh thank God! I’m starving!” Tobin declares. 

“And here I thought you’d already eaten,” Christen teases as she lays back in the bed, letting Tobin go answer the door. 

Tobin throws a grin over her shoulder. 

  
  


Later -

When their bodies are sated, when their muscles are spent, and they’re wrapped in each other’s arms, Tobin feels happiness flooding through her. 

“Jrue is going to be so psyched her Auntie Chris is with her Auntie Toto.”

Christen chuckles into the crook of her neck, places a tender kiss on her shoulder. “You think so?” 

Tobin nods. “Oh yeah. I mean her two favorite aunties together? It’s a dream come true.” 

“Here I thought I was the favorite auntie.”

“Mmm, I’m pretty sure it’s a tie,” Tobin counters. 

Christen’s lips place a soft kiss on her cheek. “Well, I won’t argue about a dream come true. Because I’m pretty sure you’re mine.” 

Tobin’s heart soars and she presses her lips to Christen’s, kisses her deeply. “I think it was fate,” Tobin counters, the memory of their first meeting coming to mind. 

Christen giggles against her lips. “Totally. Fate,” she echoes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again. In case the epilogue doesn't get written (likely, tbh), please know they live happily ever after, they get married, they have a baby, and Jrue becomes the BEST babysitter/big cousin EVER.   
xx


End file.
